Both Hugo and John attempt to open the fight with one-liners instead of one-two combos. Both suffer the consequences for their lameness
*POW!* Hugo takes a fist to the face!
"BAM!" John takes a knee to the gut!
As both men stagger back, the Ringmaster laughs in delight. The fight is on!!!
Brooke play-acts a sort of hissy that, if this weren’t a movie and she weren’t a costar, would draw a lot of attention. Especially in a bikini.
She slams her Round 1 sign to the ground— (Sound effects make slamming cardboard possible.) —and says, “C’mon, boys!” The two men in Ring 1 both stop fighting and give Clara quizzical looks. “Not you.” One man immediately punches the other, who cusses and hits back. Blood gushes from nostrils! (It’s a close-up. God only knows who hit whom.)
Clara looks to Ring 2. “Show the chump who’s champ!” To Ring 3, “Beguile that f*#+er!”
She then climbs up to where the flying trapeze is normally performed. She grabs the swing by the handle and cheers!
“Johnny Johnny Johnny go!
Not Hollywood I mean John Snow!”
She flips in the air, falls to the net, bounces up and splits-jumps!
“Snowball Fight time! Johnny go!
Kick his butt not his balls though!”
"OOF!" John doubles over when the Viper's knee hammers the air from his lungs. Audio effects leave ringing ears for the audience that slowly fades back in with Clara's encouraging chant.
"A-alright. Looks like- wheeze- The crowd wants an AVALANCHE! Snowstorm lashes out in retaliation with a straight left.
The snap strike throws the Viper off, and John follows it up with a right hook that rattles his opponent. The camera zooms as he finishes it with a hard boot to the man's jaw, a tooth spins away in slow motion as he sprawls to the ground! Johnny straightens his tank top and flashes Clara a thumbs up and a wink.
Secretly, Christopher hopes that tooth is a prop because he can't actually remember.
Hugo takes the punch to the face and spits some blood out onto the floor, "It appears the fight has finally begun." Implying that the fight hadn't begun until right this instant, which would have made much more sense if there was any sort of banter between his opponent and him.
Still internally hitting himself for the terrible one-liner, he goes to sweep at the lumberjack.
And naturally, Hugo is unable to land a sweep on the Lumbering Jack, due to him being so used to riding on logs.
"Well then. Guess I need to change my strategy."
He wasn't a bad fighter, he certainly had the physicality for it, but later on he would be swearing that the fight choreographer just gave him bad tips... Everyone else would know that Johnny Hollywood was notorious for improvising lines and fight maneuvers .