Reta cuts Mogmurch free!
Mogmurch cackles, rubbing his wrists, then picks up the dogslicer and frees Reta in return.
With Reta and Mogmurch free, but still in the pie, it's anyone's game!
Chuffy takes first out of the pie, but there's points for second and third, too!
Poog rolls and rolls, but the thick goo still impedes him!
Mogmurch hops out of the pie, grabbing a handful and stuffing it in his mouth in celebration.
Reta gets second place and Mogmurch third! With that, the contest is over!
Wise Mummy Sprattleharsh examines each of you amidst the cheering. Finally she shuffles forward and places the Crunchy Crown of Chiefdom upon Poog's head! "Poog am chief, but you rest am subchieftans, since you am very impressive, too. All hail the Chiefs!" The Birdcrunchers cheer and whistle as they hoist you onto their shoulders.
Furthermore, you are granted access to the treasury, which currently holds the following treasures: Among the 840 gp in assorted coins, art objects, trophies, jars of pickles, shiny rocks, dented armor fragments, broken dogslicers, and bird parts in various stages of decay are the following items of particular interest: four potions of cure moderate wounds, a potion of fire resistance, a wand of lesser restoration (9 charges), a +1 flaming dogslicer, a Small cloak of elvenkind, a bead of force, a necklace of fireballs (type I), and 5 ounces of sovereign glue.
That night, you feast and party. At dawn the next morning Wise Mummy Sprattleharsh awakens you with kicks and cane pokes. "Time to be chiefs! You go kill the Munchmeats!"
Wise Mummy Sprattleharsh has a few words of advice for the PCs before they set off—she warns them that the fire-breathing pigs breathe fire, and that Pa Munchmeat hits hard. He also casts spooky plant spells and has a mean daughter with a pet weasel bigger than a horse, and there might be other monsters living on the farm as well. She gives the PCs a crude map of the area that shows the way to Pa Munchmeat’s farm before shooing them on their way, implying (if not outright saying) that the PCs shouldn’t bother returning to the Birdcrunchers until the task is done.
Mogmurch snatches the cloak, watching the others with narrowed eyes to see if anyone else will make a move towards it.
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Chuffy steps forward to accept his crown and is crushed when the old deaf, dumb and blind woman calls out Poog as the winner.. "Ummm we demand a recount! Did you count my hanging chads?"
His disappointment is short lived however when he sees the pile of cash in the treasury. GOLD GOLD! I bet I can carry lots of this...
The glint in his eyes however blind him as the other 'chiefs' make off with all the useful stuff for the most part. "Dammit.." As he scoops up a healing potion and eyes the fire resistance potion. "Chuffy too fast to get burned by fire. Someone else should take this or Poog will burn you like his cooking! Ha!"
You set out way too early for comfort, as the sun's rays rise above the Birdcruncher caves. The map is crude, but seems accurate and you follow it mostly.
45 minutes into your walk, you find yourself in the middle of a field covered with edible berry bushes. Suddenly there is a commotion in the bushes!
Chuffy spots a hulking porcine shape in a nearby berry bush!
Round 1:
Goblins!
Piggy!
Mogmurch cackles with glee. Piggy is no horse, but he will still gladly eat it. He tosses a bomb right at the piggy's snout. "Burn piggy!"
Chuffy fires, hitting the boar and eliciting a squeal of pain and anger. Poog follows up with another scorching burst, giving the area the smell of roast pork. Mogmurch's bomb hits hard, shaking the bushes and adding to the pork-smell. Reta strolls forward, but the sudden blaze causes her dogslicer to miss by inches!
The great boar squeals and stamps its hooves. He lunges at Reta! for damage!
Reta's swing almost misses, but catches the pig on the back swing!
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Chuffy laughs, and drools a bit at the same time as the heavenly smell starts to work its way to him Smell so gud!
He frowns when Reta gets in the way of his next shot, but smirks a bit when she gets gored by the pig. "We're coming to stab too Reta, don't do all the stabbin' without us!" He hustles around the back of the pig, drawing out his own dogslicer in the process.
Mogmurch shouts, "Stupid goblins let the piggy fry!" and waits for the boar to move, holding a vial of acid at the ready.
Chuffy moves around, which Mogmurch throws another pig-roasting bomb! Reta slices, but the piggie is a little on fire and terrified and hyper-aware and she misses! Poog moves up and slices, too, but the flaming piggie dodges him, too!
The flaming piggie bites down on some gourd around its neck and belches fire at Reta and Poog! damage and a Reflex save DC 12 for half!
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Chuffy smiles, mouth agape a bit as the pig breathes fire Wow, we needs to learn to do that King! Maybe after we get done stabbin' it!
Chuffy starts to do a dance of glee when Reta moves across from him, turning the pig ever so slightly that his soft vulnerable bits are presented right before Chuffy, perfect for stabbin. "Oh this is gonna be FUN! Hold on tight piggy, this is gonna hurt!"
Just as he's going in for the kill the pig's tail smacks his blade and throws off his aim. "NOOOO dammit!!"
Reta flanks with Chuffy after the pig's sudden flaming belch, and cuts deeply into its side. It falls to the ground and Chuffy finishes it off with a stab!
Around the pig's neck are two more of the strange gourd he ate just before belching fire!
Mogmurch comes bounding into the carnage and takes a big bite out of the piggie's ear. "That's the best part."
He is distracted by the gourds and is antsy to take them for himself. Fire fire fire fire fire I could BREATHE fire fire fire fire fire...
It's fairly easy to trace the piggy's trail back to the source: the dreaded Munchmeat Farm! Surrounded by a rickety wooden fence and thick mud, Munchmeat Farm slumps in a soggy valley between two low tors. A slimy-looking creek winds through the farm, which is barely anything to look at. A house in the center of the fenced-in area leans against two hefty buttresses holding up three large beams. It’s balanced on numerous thick log stilts that create a cage-like hollow in the mud below the building. North of the house are a few filthy chicken coops, and to the west an upturned boat, propped against the fence, has been built into an impromptu shelter. A shed sits to the south of the building, and south and east of this shed are a few tired stretches of garden that look like they’re best at growing mud and weeds.
You approach from the south, eyeing the place warily. A single rickety farm gate allows passage through the wooden fence here, below an archway made of broken branches and bleached bones. A sign hangs from the arch, its words scrawled onto the wood with what looks like blood. Three severed, maggot-covered goblin heads sit on poles driven into the ground to the left of the gate. A second sign leans against these poles under the heads.
The signs read, though no decent goblin would ever read them, “Trespsrs wil b eatn!” The one near the three goblin heads reads, “Yous gobluns taste YUM! Send moar gobluns!”