Yes. I was working on classified special weapons, as you can probably guess. Most of my work was more....conservative than these designs....new tanks, fighter jets, armored transports, the usual.... After Cthulhu invaded, I pulled out some of my more radical designs, such as these.... The president even examined them himself.... It was decided that the manpower and cost to produce even one of my designs could be better spent combatting Cthulhu with existing weapons and vehicles.... Well, you saw how that turned out.
I've been wondering ever since Cthulhu showed up, what happened to Obama? Is he hiding out in some underground super-bunker somewhere? Or was he in the White House when Cthulhu turned it into a heap of white rubble?
That, I don't know.... I have a feeling that, if I managed to live this long, surely the president of the United States managed to get to safety in some relatively secure location.... I know of several hidden underground bases he could be at.... I just don't know whether he made it to one of them or not.... After communications satellites were downed by Cthulhu's star spawn, information was basically limited to what you could see with your own eyes.... He would have more resources to survive with than any of us, but then, none of us was a specific target for an evil god, like all the world leaders were....
We never really stood a chance against the first wave.... Who could see that coming? I mean, besides those of us at Pandora's Box.... And even we didn't know where or how it would happen....
I've been wondering why we didn't nuke R'lyeh....or however you pronounce the damned place....
Free of dinner with Aaron and Sun, Radsworth comes across the tail end of the conversation.
"How much foreknowledge did Pandoras Box have? I remember Solomon emailing me some nonsense in 2009, but like any sane person, I ignored it. I was still just a professor and archaeologist in Boston. Everyone in New York retreated away from the sea. I figured the Midwest would be safest, and traded away my entire savings for a ride to Dallas with a trucker."
Rad frowns.
"After he got eaten in Tennessee I took his truck and kept running to Dallas, although it was pretty obvious by then the midwest was no safer than anywhere else. I hid in a library. If I was going to die, better surrounded by books than in the streets. It was then I found Magus Novicia. A spell book with two spells, Detect Magic and Read Magic. That's what led me to Traveller and my current spellbook. It was some strange adventure, a scared professor making a tour of every library he could, discovering how much arcane was hidden among the mundane books of libraries...I imagine it was much easier for those who were in Pandoras Box the whole time."
From what Solomon and Al have told me, the Order of the Elder Sign has had an idea that Cthulhu would rise again on Winter Solstice of 2012 for a long time.... At least since the early 1930s.... The order itself was originally founded by a group of scientists, professors, and occultists attached to Miskatonic University in Arkham, Massachusetts, back in 1934.... Over the decades, various dedicated members kept the order going, passing on a growing body of evidence, secret case studies, and eldritch lore to carefully selected successors.... I was recruited only a few months before the s@#+ hit the fan, so I really only know what Solomon and Al have told me....
Rather than grow angry, Radsworth finds himself empathizing with Dirge and the others.
"Imagine. The burden of not only knowing that Cthulu would come, but also knowing that if you told anyone at all, you jeopardize being able to resist him at all. Cthulu's cultists had the advantage of knowing that anyone who tried to speak out against them would be written off as insane. Even worse, those who spoke out still never learned who the cultists were, but revealed themselves to their machinations."
Rad sighs, then checks over Traveler.
"The best odds came from letting the world die, then fighting back as best you could. I do not envy their forewarning at all."
In fact, nuclear weapons were deployed against R'lyeh....but were somehow neutralized.... According to reports I heard, incoming missiles were....drawn....into some kind of, uh....extradimensional rifts, or....holes....that seemed to open in parts of the alien city.... I can't claim to understand how....
Dr Grimm nods in agreement with Radsworth, and takes another drink from his bottle of Jack Daniels....
MJ considers Radsworth's words, rubbing the stubble on his chin....
Yeah.... That must have been a burden to see this coming, but know that if you tried to warn everyone else, you'd be laughed at at best, or kidnapped and sacrificed to demons at worst....
Hooty turns the Tomahawk southeastward and flies at full speed, beads of sweat glistening on his brow....
Jesus Christ.... It's....it's following us.... That....that's not a tornado back there....
Omigod.....Omigod.... It's gaining on us! It's gonna catch us!!
Jewels peers back through a side window at the whirlwind chasing the chopper, about 100 yards behind....
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Let's see if a few .50-cal rounds discourage it any....
Dwayne Lee slides open the side door and rolls the .50 caliber machinegun mounted on a swiveling track out the door, turns the barrel back toward the pursuing Ithaqua-whirlwind, and presses down on the trigger, releasing a hail of bullets at the Great Old One....
RA-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT....
.50 caliber machinegun at Ithaqua-whirlwind with -6 range penalty fails to pierce DR....
Dammit.... I don't think I hit it.... If I did, it didn't slow it down any....
The shamans say you need magic cold iron bullets to harm these demons....
I can accommodate....
Dwayne Lee draws Daisy and lets loose a volly of magic rounds (treated as cold iron due to +5 enhancement) at -6 range penalty....
to confirm crit damage
109 total piercing and bludgeoning to Ithaqua!
RRRROOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGHHHH!!!
The pursuing whirlwind falters and falls back 100 feet....
Bear-Strong gives Dwayne a thumbs up signal....
Good shooting, Dwayne! It's working!
YEEEEE-HAAAAA!! TAKE THAT, M$+!@@$&##%&!!!
Dwayne aims Daisy at the receding whirlwind, but holds his fire, not wanting to waste rounds that would likely miss at this distance (400 feet)....
Oh, thank God! Is it going away!?
I think so....
Hooty keeps the Tomahawk speeding on course for the Grand Canyon, hoping the Great Old One has decided to give up the chase....
After another few minutes that seem like an eternity, the whirlwind is no longer visible behind them....
Vash appears out of the night sky riding on Glaza's back, on the starboard side of the chopper, and waves....
There's Vash, looks like he made it.... But I have a bad feeling about Nate....
Me, too.... But there was nothing we could do, right?
Jewels vainly scans the starry sky in search of an owl that might be the Elven Druid....
G*@+%&mit! I knew we should've waited for him!
We'd be f&$+ing monster-food right now if we'd waited a second longer, Dwayne, and you know it!.... Look, maybe.... Maybe he found a safe place to hide and is making his way home as we speak....
Right! And maybe some pigs will fly outta my ass and turn into pork chops and chicken wings....
The Weresquatch Squad ride home in gloomy silence, frequently casting apprehensive glances back to the northwest to see if Ithaqua has resumed pursuit, or hopefully but vainly searching for some sign of Nature Boy....
The whirling blades of the Tomahawk echo in the darkened depths of the Grand Canyon sometime after midnight, and the weary and crestfallen adventurers retire quietly to their tents....
Jewels seeks out Derrik, finding him brooding over Excalibur by a campfire in a shallow cave at the edge of the new Box....
Hi, baby! I missed you so much.... Me and Dwayne Lee, and Greg Bear-Strong, and Hooty, and Vash 'n Glaza....and Nature Boy....went to Texas to hunt weresquatches.... And we saw this....tornado or something, that Hooty said was a Great Old One, and Greg said was a demonlord.... I think it got Nature Boy, Derrik!
Jewels runs to Derrik and throws herself in his arms, sobbing on his neck....
Nature Boy's gone, Derrik.....*SOB!!*....That f@*+ing thing ate him, I know it!!....*SOB!!*....*SNIFF!!*
Jewels crushes Derrik in a powerful hug that squeezes a gasp out of him....
Omigod! I'm sorry, baby!.....*SNIFF!!*
She eases her grip on Derrik, giggling through wet tears....
You always make everything seem a little better, baby.... I love you so much.... I don't know what I'd do if Cthulhu ever chowed down on you.... I'd totally flip out and chop him into calamari bites!!
The pretty young orcess makes "doe eyes" at Derrik....
Love me, Derrik.... she sighs, melting in the magnetic young hero's arms....
Kailin laughs quietly as the Professor is unceremoniously dragged away to his dinner.
Have a nice meal Rad.
Kailin spends most of his time in the box fluting outside his tent.
Around midnight of April 23rd-24th, a gray coyote dances with obvious grace and humor to Kailin's piping, emerging from the shadows at the edge of the campfire, black eyes sparkling and reflecting the flames, brilliant with intellect and mirth....
For as long as Kailin plays, the coyote dances around the edge of the camp, and the Navajo shamans and people emerge from their tents to join in the dance.... A dance which the Navajo ever after celebrate and recreate at midnight on April 23rd, calling it the Coyote Flute Dance....
All humans on Earth gain a +10 morale bonus on Profession (farmer) and Survival checks for the next 72 hours, and a +4 morale bonus on Profession (farmer) and Survival checks made for 24 hours after subsequent annual Coyote Flute Dances are performed by 4 or more shamans of 8th level or higher, while a bard of 8th level or higher performs on a flute....
Yingzen wonders off to find a place where he can practice his sword and meditate in peace. He sets about working with his sword,his movements are fluid and graceful.
As Yingzen is returning to his tent after his meditations and swordplay practice, he hears a hypnotic flute riff echoing in the canyon, played by the aasimar bard Kailin Kros....
He is met on the trail leading into the camp by a gray coyote that dances with obviously divine grace and humor, tongue wagging merrily and eyes glittering with glee....
Yingzen feels a strange sense of kinship with this dancing coyote, and feels the urge to join him in a mystical dance around the camp....
He finds that the Navajo tribes feel this pull to dance to Kailin's piping as well at the camp, for there the shamans dance and sing, along with the people....
Hell fuggin' yeah! I like what Kailin and the Tribes are cookin' up over there.... See ya, guys 'n gals! If you wanna shake your booty with me an' the Red Men, come along!
Mikey Jay begins to groove along with the hypnotic piping of Kailin Kros, and joins in the First Annual Coyote Flute Dance, popping and locking, shuffling and sliding along with the shamans, the people, and Coyote the Trickster....
What the f%%!!? HAHAHAHAHA!! Check out that coyote!! Holy f$$*in' s!$@!! What.... Is that Merlin!?.... That s&!~'s f~+*in' funny!!
When Kailin sees the coyote he leaps to his feet and begins dancing around the camp fluting all the while.
Nay, Mikey Jay, 'tis not I.... responds Merlin from the shadows, who begins to caper and prance in spite of his centuries of age....
I ken it be some native deity of this land.... Worshipped by yonder Red Men.... It hath come to bless us in some fashion, to strengthen us against Cthulhu and his ilk....
Amber Lynn grabs Mikey Jay and begins to dance with him....
Someone trained that coyote to dance like that, right? she laughs, overcome with joy and swept up in the Coyote Flute Dance....
Andy finds himself moved to try to dance, though he had never before felt so compelled.... He rises and grins awkwardly at the others assembled around his plans....
I'll be happy to answer any questions about my designs after this....dance....I just can't resist....
Captain Kermit jukes and jives.... He does "the robot"....
Professor Radsworth, my good fellow.... I do believe we are at a crossroads, cosmologically speaking.... A very rare, perhaps unique conjunction of time and space in which metaphysical matters are more tangible than ever before.... Magic is strong once again, as it was in Merlin's time for awhile, and as it has been many times in antiquity....
AAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Coyote dances with his people, blessing them....
Daisy dances with wild abandon, seeking out Koran and taking him by the oversized hand, enraptured by the Coyote Flute Dance....
Wait a sec.... Y'know what would make this even more magical?.... Molly!
Doc pops two pills with pictures of Spongebob Squarepants on them, washes them down with a Miller Lite, and begins dancing....
Grimm seeks out Kate and dances with her, twirling her around and kissing her often....
Dwayne Lee dances with some of the women rescued from Lido Key....
Bear-Strong joins the dance along with his people....
Radsworth watches all the dancing and partying with some concern. Losing yourself in a song was too much like being taken by an enchantment to Radsworth. He was relieved however, to find Sun Mi dancing without a male partner.
"I'd say Chesterfield, that is probably the only reason I can channel enough energy to light a candle. I certainly fear I don't have half the natural talent the Magi of old did. I cannot help but wonder if humanity would had been better served if a better novice than myself had found Traveler and taken up this quest."
He watches the dancing a bit more, then heads back to finally scribe the spells Merlin gave him.
"Do you wish to stay with the party Chesterfield? I don't mind if you do."
The option given, he heads back to his rooms. Though he will ask Merlin if he has had a chance to scry the location of the Cthulu Symbols creator.
Hell-No Kitty, Aaron Crux, and Sun Mi join the dance, laughing and clapping....
Koran reluctantly dances with Daisy, somewhat clumsier than before his transformation.
He dances up beside greg. Hey Bear-Strong, wanna arm wrestle?
Hooty is relieved by the festive atmosphere, following his harrowing flight from Ithaqua....
The dancing, music and laughter seems to be a balm to his shaken soul....
Yingzen joins in the dance with Coyote. It seems for a moment that a huge wieght is lifted off of Yingzen
Koran reluctantly dances with Daisy, somewhat clumsier than before his transformation.
He dances up beside greg. Hey Bear-Strong, wanna arm wrestle?
Bear-Strong looks up at the giant tiefling and laughs....
You nearly tore me in half when we wrestled, Demon-Hammer!.... I think I'd rather keep my arm in its socket, bro! Haha!
Kate laughs and dances with Grimm, radiant with beauty and happiness....