GM Aeon's We Be Goblins (Inactive)

Game Master d'Eon

Chuffy, go check red chest for trappy booms she says pointing at the chest.

The pustulent goblin giggles and does so.

Check for traps: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (16) + 5 = 21

Chuffy finds no evidence of any traps. Inside the chest there are a number of fireworks, enough to satisfy Gutwad for at least a week. Rummaging through the piles of filth turns up a few interesting items as well. Many of the objects depict colorful serpentine dragons, towering cliffs, delicate humanoid figures, and strange pointy human buildings. The most interesting part about this stuff is it's all made of cloth, paper, and bamboo, and is thus quite flammable.

Among the more obviously valuable objects are some big people coins, a bejeweled silver and jade lantern built to look like a coiled dragon, a dozen masterwork shuriken, an ivory and gold fan depicting a gecko walking amid cherry blossoms worth (the reverse side of this fan has been used by Vorka to draw a crude map of Brinestump, not unlike the one Scribbleface created), a long hairpin with a red pearl at one end, a wand, and an elixir in a crystal vial shaped like a heart. The fireworks in the chest consist of 14 Desnan candles, 20 paper candles, and seven skyrockets.

Reta likes the heart shaped vial. This purity! she says.

Got everything we come looking for? she asks. [b] Let's go home! [/ooc]

Chuffy grins widely. "We have all the fireworks and the shinies? Burn everything else, so the pinkskins will see it and be scared of us!"

Burn baby burn! she cackles with glee

"Oooh, yes! Poog burn, Poog burn!"

The remaining treasures on the ship burn quite nicely, and little remains of them but ash very soon.

And that is pretty much it! Who's carrying the fireworks back home?

The trip back home is rather uneventful, and Slorb and Chief Gutwad summon you to the Chief's Hut immediately upon your return. Gutwad bellows from high atop the Teeter Chair, "What news of your most important task, my heroes?"

Poog will attempt to haul the fireworks back, though I assume his party is less than likely to agree.

"Good news, Chief Gutwad! Poog find many fireworks to make Zarongel happy, and Poog also kill lots of dogs and a horse, and Lotslegs Eat Goblin Babies Many and meanie Vorka who eat goblins!"

Chief Gutwad narrows his eyes. "Poog did all this by hisself? Did other heroes get lazy?"

Poog looks around.

"Yes."

Chuffy shakes his head indignantly and hits Poog. "Poog lies! Chuffy and Reta and Mogmurch all fought good!"

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"Chuffy is correct, we all contributed, though poog mainly fell of ladder while everyone else fight. I make many burnings

Poog do nothing but stink and fart. says the gobliness.

"Not true," the goblin cries in protest. "Poog do other things too! Poog blow Vorka up with big firework and slice dog's throat!"

Chuffy nods scornfully. "Poog use biggest firework to blow up Vorka--after Mogmurch made her dying! Poog wasted firework, when we could have captured Vorka and brought her back here for you to kill special and slow!"

[b[ Poog is a poo poo, a poo poo ca ca [/b] laughts the Reta

Chief Gutwad holds up a filthy paw. "Enough! Poog seems honest goblin, and Chuffy agree Poog blow up Vorka. In honor of this deed, Poog shall marry my daughter, Gupy Wartbits!" An extremely corpulent goblin in a filthy dress waddles in at the sound of her name and claps with glee at the sight of the cleric in his armor. "Ooh, a hero! C'mere honey!" Gupy rushes to Poog and attempts to drag him away, showering him with kisses.

Gutwad clears his throat and continues. "Now then, you are all great heroes of Licktoad Tribe, and shall be rewarded as such! Mogmurch, you shall be the Boss of Big Fire! Study the fireworks and learn to make more!"

Gutwad looks to Reta, "Reta, you shall be Head Village Watcher! Watch for bad stuff, and do bad stuff to it!"

"And Chuffy, you are good at stabbing, you are now the Overseer of Stabbings! It is what it sounds like!"

With that, Gutwad waves you out into the cheering village, where a few huts are already on fire from the fireworks you brought back.

Chronicles should be up later tonight!

Chuffy opens his mouth as if to say something at the chief's first pronouncement, then shuts it with a grin. Better Poog than me! Stupid Poog! When his new title is granted, though, his smile broadens even more. "Thank you, mighty Chief!"

Thanks for running! I was going to say that I had a blast before realizing that I actually did, thanks to Poog.

This was a lot of fun. Thanks so much