DM Iron-Dice We Be Goblins! (Game) (Inactive)

Game Master Iron-Dice

"Mr. Toads wilde ride comes to an end."- Awesome : )

THud looks around quietly for a long moment then a very small and very frightened sound comes from somewhere deep inside him and he keels over.

deRaged and Fatigued 8 rounds- bleck.

THud looks around quietly for a long moment then a very small and very frightened sound comes from somewhere deep inside him and he keels over.]

And what a glorious rage it was. Two dogzessess, part of a horsessess and one giant toddie. Sweeeeeeeeet.

Thok looks at the fallen Grimlek, then up at Vorka. Then, in honor of all the goblins out there...he throws more fire. At Vorka.

Elemental Ray 3/4 vs Touch AC: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10

Damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6

Somehow...I doubt that hits

Glop looks at Thoks elemental ray and shakes head. Glop surveys the othe gobs. Knowing Grimlek needs help and Vorka is likely to kill him as soon as she has opportunity Glop moves down the latter and is next to Grimlick. ( I think I stepped in Toothlizards poo) Glop touches Grimlek and sings gob healing song -

Grimlek gleam and glow, Let your power show
Heal what has been hurt, Change the fates design
Make the clock reverse, Bring back what once was cursed.

After Glop heals Grimlek - she hands Grimlek a flask of oil - set Vorka on fire burn her with her own flame!

Cure Light Wounds (DC 12)
1d20 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 2 = 8

Healing 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

:( very sad

Vorka leans aside as Thok's ray flies past.
Licktoad soceror ha' weak spell. Vorka's better az I send ya tu HELL

Glop darts down the ladder to the lower deck. Laying hands on Grinlek, he brightnes up with a big smile. Oh, and there was healing also.

Vorka's delight fades away faster than dog heads meeting Thuds club.
She looks down at the aberrant behavior below.

Ayeeeeeeee! Stew meat iz alive ag'in. By Lamashtu's hammer, I sh'll avenge yu!
Pretty girlz ma'ke em bett'r. Bad pretty girlz. Bad pretty. Ma now take away heal'n an ro'st ya inta cruncky nuggetz!

Vorkas flaming hand snaps towards Glop and a ball of hot fire shoots forth.
Ranged touch attack, no penelty for range 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (16) + 3 = 19
screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. FOOM!

Vorkanator damage 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 3 = 7

Hahyahhh! Extra crunchy. Mmmmmmm Mmmmmmm. cackle cackle

Vorka's delight fades away faster than dog heads meeting Thuds club.

She looks down at the aberrant behavior below.

Ayeeeeeeee! Stew meat iz alive ag'in. By Lamashtu's hammer, I sh'll avenge yu!
Pretty girlz ma'ke em bett'r. Bad pretty girlz. Bad pretty. Ma now take away heal'n an ro'st ya inta cruncky nuggetz!

Vorkas flaming hand snaps towards Glop and a ball of hot fire shoots forth.
Ranged touch attack, no penelty for range 1d20 + 3
screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. FOOM!

Vorkanator damage 1d6 +3

Hahyahhh! Extra crunchy. Mmmmmmm Mmmmmmm. cackle cackle

GOB HEROEZ GO!

*MAP* of carnage

OOWWWEEEEEEEE!!!!! -4

Glop lays on the deck unconscious. Where she once stood helping Grimlek she now has no idea what is happing.
Glop's last through before the blackness takes her "Kill Vordka"

Stablizing Check - 1d20 - 4 + 1 ⇒ (16) - 4 + 1 = 13
Yeah - no additional damage this round

Glop- Con bonus applies and once you stabilize you don't need to check again.

Thud rouses himself upon hearing Glop's crunchification and gets the heck out of the nasty Witchin' Kitchen. He takes the ladder to the next level and starts trying to climb the mast toward Vorka.

HP: 6, Condition: fatigued- -2 Str and Dex

climb 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (17) - 1 = 16

Thud sprints our the door, up the ladder and spans the highest deck to the mast.
20 movement to get there
He starts climbing the well used mast easy DC 12 climb check
it's 15 feet to the top, or stop where you run out of movement.
1/4 movement penalty for climbing strait up.

Thud sprints our the door, up the ladder and spans the highest deck to the mast.

20 movement to get there
He starts climbing the well used mast easy DC 12 climb check
it's 15 feet to the top, or stop where you run out of movement.
1/4 movement penalty for climbing strait up.

GO THUD GO!!!!

so if it's a double move to climb to safety, Thud will take cover behind the mast at the end of his move this turn and take the next full round bolting up the mast. if that's ok.

so if it's a double move to climb to safety, Thud will hide behind the mast at the end of his move this turn and take the next full round bolting up the mast. if that's ok.

Smart Thud! That way your not a standing target 40 feet up on Vorka's turn. Clever clever Thud.

Thud cowers like a scared youngling girl on the east side of the mast-stack. Our mighty Licktoad hero in action!
:-)

Grimlek is about to reach down to return the favor to Glop before realizing that he didn't remember da healzes today. Grimlek yells and hurls Eyegouger at stupid Vorka eyes.

Attack 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (15) + 5 = 201d4 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

HA takeses dat! Grimlek looks around to see if other gobs saw how awesome he is with his throw.

Watching the throw, Thok starts to applaud. As he does so, he remembers they are still fighting Vorka, and fires off one last Elemental Ray at her.

RTA vs Vorka:1d20 + 4 ⇒ (17) + 4 = 21

Damage:1d6 ⇒ 3

A satisfied nod, Thok decides an exit, stage Wheelhouse is appropriate, and books it inside, being extra careful to be really, really quiet once inside.

Stealth once inside the wheelhouse:1d20 + 8 ⇒ (18) + 8 = 26

Varka clings confidently to the rigging cackling with delight.
cackle caclke Oweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! she screams as Grinlek's eyegouger pierces her side.
Her attention focuses on the spear in her ribs, distracted she reels as Thok's ray of ouches breaks her defenses. Oweee! Ooooooooooooooooeeee!

Keen Goblin eyes may notice the Vorka is now bleeding from her newly inflicted spear wound, instead of just absorbing the punishment.
That's a clue she is at or over 1/2 HP damage. Something I adopted as a reference point for PC's to gauge the battle by.

Vorka looks down then all around
Wh'a all ma tastee treatz a'go?
She gestures to where she thought the Gobbarrian had gone, looks down for the scorcher sorcerer.
Comz out comz out wh'a ev'er ya are. I'lz cookz ya tu. But 'till den, i'll killz dez tu.

Vorka eyes Grinlek, who was dead, standing over the now dead looking girlz that made him not-dead but is now dead. Shaking her head over that mental puzzle, Grimlek is her only non-dead target.
killedz ya once ai did, now ai killz ya twice. Makes ya tender jucy an nice
Throws flame from her hand
Ranged touch 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (16) + 3 = 19 damage 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (2) + 3 = 5

And he's back down!
The imaginary referee kneels down besides him, counting down rounds.

Glop floating in the world of unconsciousness has random thoughts:
I hope Toothlizard is not eating me!
If I die I hope I haunt Vorka.
And Ayo, Gobs let's go!
Con check 1d20 + 1 - 4 ⇒ (14) + 1 - 4 = 11

praying for a natural 20

At least no additional damage this round - wahooooo!

Thud sneakily inches up the mast.

sounds like the 16 got me halfway up. dice don't fail me now...

climb #2 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

aw. crap.
acrobatics 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (18) + 3 = 21

at least thud lands on his feet.

at least thud lands on his feet.

Oops. This could end bad for the heroez.

that was a full round of climbing, but Thud bravely keeps the mast between himself and the witch. I think Thud will be cowering with Thok in the wheelhouse next round.

that was a full round of climbing, but Thud bravely keeps the mast between himself and the witch. I think Thud will be cowering with Thok in the wheelhouse next round.

Oh no, Gobs hideo!

Thok, tired and sickened by the sights in the Wheelhouse, takes a moment to try and snipe the rigging under the wicked witch, light it on fire, and drop her to the deck.

RTA vs Rigging:1d20 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10

Damage:1d3 ⇒ 3

Stealth Check for Sniping:1d20 - 12 ⇒ (17) - 12 = 5

Thok's ray of fire flies straight and true. The moldy and dank rope bundle at first resists burning, but slowly due to Thok's uncanny fire starting knows-of-stuff it begins puffing out thick grey smoke as damp burning things tend to do.
Ooh. Tricksey lil' gobbie. Ma make purdy necklace out'a yo teef

Embers can be seen through the smoldering smoke.
50% to break this round, +10% each additional 1d100 ⇒ 57

Vorka squats to pee out the flames only to find she's empty due to the happy dance earlier on. She then looks around for the two remaining breathing Licktoads.
Ya c'n run an ya c'n hidez. Vorka still find ya an eatz ya insidz

Needing a better vantage point to attack, Vorka moves back to the top of the stack-mast.

Updated *MAP*

Glop smells the wet rope burning and memory of Licktoad camps swims into her imagination.

"There is no place like home"

Con Check - 1d20 + 1 - 4 ⇒ (14) + 1 - 4 = 11

one thing I liked about playing in person - I could change the dice if it was not being kind to me - made me think I had more control of my rolls - PRAYING FOR A NATURAL 20, PLEASE!

At least no additional damage this round. WHAOOOO!!!! - Can someone please kill Vorka.

Alright Thud, now is your chance. Climb that mast and stomp on Vorka a few times. XP

easy for you to say. the deck is stacked against me while i'm fatigued. hey, that was a pun. deck could be cards or the floor of the boat. ha, ha. is it obvious i'm stalling?

Proving why goblin barbarians rarely make 2nd level, Thud makes another attempt on the mast.

climb 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (9) - 1 = 8
climb 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (10) - 1 = 9

and gets nowhere...

"THud...tired."

Now Eh gotz ya wh'r Eh want'z ya, Ma Gobbarrian delicacy.
Drool drips down from Vorka's over wide salivating mouth.

This could all end badly for the Heroez

Hrm...did Thok happen to see where Vorka grabbed her booms?

There does not seem to be a boom stash in the "Wheelhouse of Horrors"
The first boom she pulled from her craggy folds (clothing?)
The second was plucked from the top of the mast-stack.

I see you found the secret "Ganny" pocket in the robe of useful things that are usefull. :-)

Thok have granny pocket? Maybe throw Thok granny at Vorka. Thok Granny vicious woman...

Thok, becoming very cautions concerning the other fire wielder, carefully moves around and starts to head up the stairs, taking his time to watch for any more fire thrown at his head.

Full Defensive as a standard action, moving to the rigging square of G5. No attacking yet...she moved out of range of all my cantrips.

Vorka looks down at the roof of the wheelhouse

Ohhhhyaaa. Ma yummies ah' a com'n bak outs ta play.
Me'sa like'sa dis game

Singing
Catch'a Goblin, cut 'em inta bits
Catch'a Goblin, roats 'em on da spits
Catch'a Goblin, put 'em in'da pot
Catch'a Goblin, boil da wata hot
ScreeeHeeeHeeee

She raises her fiery hand to deliver a fatel strike.
sputt sputt Ssssssssssssss *puff* the flaming had goes out
Ayeeee! Ma used itz all ups. Durdnerbit!

Me'sa bring out bitey bites ratsesses to nibble away the ugly parts and make's ya deadz.
Holding a small piece of red cloth she mumbles and gyrates. The next moment the ship's deck trembles as out of nowhere a swarm of rats washes over the deck as a wave and impacts on Thok.

Rat's nibble nibble nibble attack on Thok 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4

Thok is apparently skilled at evading rat swarm nibbles! Yea Thok!

Nooo! Ya' suppos'ta bites green gobber, not each o'ter. Stupid rattesses

Glop faintly hears the tune Vorka sings - it is catchy but somehow every wrong.

Con Check - 1d20 + 1 - 4 ⇒ (2) + 1 - 4 = -1

come on 20

NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Glop very sad -1 What the? :( really want to change dice right now.

wow. I think that's the first neg result i've seen :P

Thud is taken aback by the swarm of rats. Not even he can eat that many rats! He seems nervous about climbing the mast again although the rats are some incentive. Thud thinks hard and then asks Thok, "THok, where is BIG...ladder?"

Thok pauses...then points. Over by the Gang plank, the ladder can be seen resting kinda cock-eyed, tossed aside with the rest of the stuff gathered from Lots-Legs. "Get Glass Swishy Things...and Candy too!"

Since I did the nifty acrobatic stuff, I figure it got set aside with the rest of the stuff, and that seemed the best place for it...

Thok pauses...then points. Over by the Gang plank the ladder can be seen resting kinda cock-eyed, tossed aside with the rest of the stuff gathered from Lots-Legs. "Get Glass Swishy Things too!"

who has the crossbow that we got from lots o legs den of Mini lots o legs ?

can thud just grab the ladder to the upper deck and use it to go up the mast?

Thok pauses...then points. Over by the Gang plank, the ladder can be seen resting kinda cock-eyed, tossed aside with the rest of the stuff gathered from Lots-Legs. "Get Glass Swishy Things...and Candy too!"

Since I did the nifty acrobatic stuff, I figure it got set aside with the rest of the stuff, and that seemed the best place for it...

Glop consciousness floats towards the memory of the taste of the candy!

first neg result - have to be the first for something! :)

Glop consciousness floats towards the memory of the taste of the candy!

first neg result - have to be the first for something! :)

Keep rolling like that and Glop be first for death too! Then you will be first for TWO things! BTW, Sorry for my sporadic posting, moving houses and lots of other things going on IRL. It may continue to be sporadic for a little while until things settle. Please feel free to NPC me whenever necessary.

can thud just grab the ladder to the upper deck and use it to go up the mast?

Brilliant! Standing on the top rung would put you at head height with the top of the mast.

Thud THUD wrote:

can thud just grab the ladder to the upper deck and use it to go up the mast?

Brilliant! Standing on the top rung would put you at head height with the top of the mast.

Go Thud Thud Go!

Thud quickly yanks the ladder up and secures it against the mast as he gets ready to rush up and introduce nasty Vorka to Gorey Guttons.

Full round action? 3 rounds of fatigue left :P

Trying to get out of the swarm of rats, Thok carefully weaves his way around, trying to avoid being nipped and snacked on and get away from the persistent rats.

Staying Full Defensive, current AC: 19

Save for Grimlek 1d20 ⇒ 4 Oops. Strike 3? Anyone tracked where he's at.

Vorka looks down at Thok running in circles with a swarm of her precious rats swirling around him. It looks pretty, like water swirling in a pot after stirring. Mmmmm. Rat and Thok stew. Yummmmmm-o! She's got to remember that.

So mesmerizing and pleasing was watching Rat-Thok stew, she payed no heed to Thud muscling up the ladder and placing it against the mast.

The rats, still under Vorka's spell, attack Thok.
Nibble Nibble Nibble Teef Teef Teef 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 2 = 22
BITE BITE BITE! 1d6 ⇒ 5

Vorka is pleased.
Eata'a all ya wants'a ma ratsissess! I'm'a gon'a puts ya in'a da stew alsa. HaaaHaaaaa.

She looks down at Thud.
Me'a gots a present fur ya. A perty dartsesses to poke in'ta ya brain! Yahhhhhhhehhhhhehhh!
Game o' darts with Thud 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (6) + 5 = 11
Arrrrg! Dab-nerbit dartsisses
Wh'y won't ya'll just die!

Do you lay down and surrender?
Runaway?
Attack?
Pick yer butt and delay giving Vorka another go at it?

Ha! Thok show Grimlek and Glop. Thok be first to die!

Thok is now at -2. Saving throw to stop bleeding...

Con Check:1d20 - 2 ⇒ (20) - 2 = 18

Or not? What happens when one gets a Natural 20 on a con check?

Ha! Thok show Grimlek and Glop. Thok be first to die!

Thok is now at -2. Saving throw to stop bleeding...

Con Check:1d20-2

Or not? What happens when one gets a Natural 20 on a con check?

You sir, are one luckey Gob. The nat 20 puts you at "0" hp, and awake. As long as you are at 0, you can only take one action. Standard or movement, not both.

Thok, bitten by rats and mostly singed hits the ground...and stays awake. Unused to this circumstance, Thok does his best to keep from being rat food and tries desperately to figure out how long till he truly stops being rat food.

Uh, full defensive as a standard action. Also...I am prone with the swarm, aren't I?

Spellcraft Check to Identify the Spell Vorka Cast, and its Duration:1d20 + 5 ⇒ (11) + 5 = 16

Thok normally would drop prone, but since you hit a nat 20 on the first try, you could have just been "on the ropes" and never blacked out completely or hit the ground. Your choice.

Concentrating on Vorka's spell, you can deduce that the summoned swarming rats were materialized from a summon swam:Rats spell. Duh! Even Glop figured that out :-)
More importantly she appears to be Druish, and you know those Druid spells last about two rounds after she stops concentrating. Since she got bored with you after the first round, that leaves two before the rats go looking for less combative food.
sceeeee sceeee sceeeee nibble nibble nibble

swarms don't threaten or have to roll an attack. They automatically damamge anyone in their space at the end of their turn.

Thud scampers up the ladder and tries to plug Vorka with the magic dogslicer.
"Eat THIS!"

hp:6 ; condition: fatigued- 2 more rounds

Hi-ya! 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (3) + 5 = 8
damage 1d4 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6

oops.

Thok is one lucky Gob. I STILL WANT NEW DICE ;)

Con Check 1d20 + 1 - 5 ⇒ (16) + 1 - 5 = 12
YEAH no additional damage this round. Please someone kill Vorka so I can wake up. This is not very hero like. Glop sits at the corner of the table of the game (figuratively) and is looking annoyed - do not want to die. :)

Ah, kinda wish I had known that earlier. Can Thok get away from the swarm, instead of standing there like an idiot?

Thok hears his inner voice deep within his skull
Thok smart. Thok no dumb dumb. Thok no ID-E-OT like poo poo hu-manz. Thok kno fire. Must be big smartz to kno fire stuffs. Thok hungry. Vorka's skirt blowing in the wind. Dont look up. Thok no look up. okay, Thok look a little. EAWOEEEEEEEEEEEE! *barf*

No real way to get away from the swarm. The stick like glue. No tripping or outrunning.
Standing up or prone is really just exposition.
Full defensive is good to keep from getting damaged. If some better ideas hits you, we can modify this turn up until Vorka goes again.