The LGBT Gamer Community Thread.


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Pathfinder Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
Kalindlara wrote:
I still want to play a PFS character who works up to purchasing such an elixir. My table might get mad at me though...

That was actually the original goal of my -10. 'Make enough money between entertaining and adventuring to afford some means of setting things aright' (He's a bard, before your brain goes into the gutter further)

But given recent events and encounters, the 'trust fund' he's set up for that has been... woefully tapped for much needed gear upgrades.

Maybe someday...


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Freehold DM wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:
... as an example of experience from my own transition. There is value in doing things the hard way and in this case, that's experience.
I learned to zip my fly slowly, as a lad. I have nothing but sympathy for those who are going through a crash course.

Button flies! They stay done up, and you can't snag anything in them!

Try singing it to the tune of 'Goldfinger'. It almost scans.


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Re fly-zipping: Tuck things safely out of the way first and the process gets easier.

This has been an informative discussion, and has me wondering what the best way is to integrate the transition portion of a character's development into a campaign.

Were I to integrate it into a PFS-type setting I might start by figuring out how the elixir of sex shifting came about in-game. It seems to me like there should be a support group for transgendered people either in Golarion or within the Pathfinder Society, the exact composition of which I'm too removed from the issue to suggest. Probably this would include some higher level caster who develops items for people the group has properly vetted, and are sure will be comfortable in their new body.

A thought for gaining the elixir without creating purchasing power concerns, write a short module wherein a group of pathfinders help this support organization gather the materials they need for the elixir/transitional alchemical substances. The process could explore/raise awareness of trans issues in Golarion, with the PCs helping a specific NPC in each scenario. At the end provide the elixir as a boon from the organization.

Dark Archive

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Kalindlara wrote:
I still want to play a PFS character who works up to purchasing such an elixir. My table might get mad at me though...

Well, in a wonderful mirror of real life: It really isn't any of their business to tell you what your PC should or shouldn't do with their gold =D.

I've debated playing a Vigilante whose Social Persona/AE are different genders to represent a "gender fluid" PC; ideally an Arshea or Shelyn worshipper. It may have to wait for a home game, though. There are a number of conversations that I'd probably have to trudge through repeatedly at PFS tables with the PC that wouldn't be fun, especially when I make it clear this isn't something I'm playing for laughs.


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Well.

Coming out happened.

I don't know if what happened during it added up to make it a bad one, or a good one, but I guess I'll summarize.

What Happened:

As few of you know, I'm still in school and thus live with my mom and her boyfriend. My mom is amazing-she can get kinda stressed easily though (must come from being a middle school teacher for five years, then attempting to manage a floundering business, that did eventually fail, before finally settling down as a librarian)-and, contrary to the cliche, my mom's boyfriend is awesome too. He's what introduced me to D&D, videogames, and got me into a variety of nerdy adventures.

So why was I scared of coming out? Because he got angry. A lot. He would never hurt a fly, but he would get pissed like you wouldn't believe. Considering that I am a slacker and somewhat of a Cloudcuckoolander, I got a considerable number of tongue lashings. He is, at heart, still a nice guy. But he doesn't take anybody's crap.

He was also kind of a big guy. Never laid a hand on me, but the fear was still there. I'm a person who's a cynic who wants to be an idealist, but I'm a cynic nonetheless.

When I finally got so tired of living something of a lie, I wrote a letter. Just one draft. I let way too much of my fear of him sink in. And then I put it in his bedroom, and took off like a bat outta the Abyss for Pathfinder.

That wasn't a great plan.

I was a nervous wreck during the whole session. Although I managed to freak out my players with this horror adventure I prepped (I came out to all of them already, so I told them about things), I ended up almost vomiting in the library toilet and hiding under a bench while attempting to calm down. It didn't work.

When I walked home and mom met me on the way, I had something of a nervous breakdown. Not the silly, casual kind, but the kind that actually means something. She held my hand as we walked home. I hid under my covers for the rest of the day.

The next day, my mom's boyfriend walked into my room. We had an awkward talk. A really awkward one. Turns out he was more offended by the fact that I was that scared of him when he's angry than the fact that I'm trans. But what really pissed me off is that he thought that I didn't mean it. I didn't-and haven't-said anything due to me still being scared because, like I said, he's scary when he's angry, but he thought it was just a teen phase.

The worst part is that now I'm doubting myself, when before I was absolutely sure I am a woman.

So that sucks.

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder PF Special Edition, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
Trekkie90909 wrote:
Were I to integrate it into a PFS-type setting I might start by figuring out how the elixir of sex shifting came about in-game.

Presumably the first sex-shiftng elixir was invented by a jaded Taldoran alchemist looking for a new diversion. It has since come into the attention of others who have different needs and reasons for obtaining one. Those needs can vary from folks who feel mistakenly gendered, to assassins and spies who use it to build a disguise foundation upon. While the elixir is not a full disguise, in that one might recognise the person as an opposite gender incarnation of the other it does get rid of the different gender DC modifier, when doing further work on assuming a disguise.

For some alchemists who have learned the skill of crafting these elixirs, they prove an occasional bonus to income.

Dark Archive

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LazarX wrote:
Trekkie90909 wrote:
Were I to integrate it into a PFS-type setting I might start by figuring out how the elixir of sex shifting came about in-game.

Presumably the first sex-shiftng elixir was invented by a jaded Taldoran alchemist looking for a new diversion. It has since come into the attention of others who have different needs and reasons for obtaining one. Those needs can vary from folks who feel mistakenly gendered, to assassins and spies who use it to build a disguise foundation upon. While the elixir is not a full disguise, in that one might recognise the person as an opposite gender incarnation of the other it does get rid of the different gender DC modifier, when doing further work on assuming a disguise.

For some alchemists who have learned the skill of crafting these elixirs, they prove an occasional bonus to income.

I'm guessing Shelyn, Arshea, or a similar faith that encourages worshippers to explore gender and identity is more likely the source.


The Doomkitten wrote:

Well.

Coming out happened.

I don't know if what happened during it added up to make it a bad one, or a good one, but I guess I'll summarize.

** spoiler omitted **...

*hugs*

That is not that different from what happened when I came out to my dad. And I was an adult at the time. Coming out gets extra complicated when there are other relationship issues involved. You'll get through this. And you can feel free to PM me if you ever just need to talk about it. I may not have the answers, but I can at least listen.


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Also, his thinking it's just a "teen phase" is his denial. A pretty standard phase in accepting new and disturbing ideas. It has nothing to do with your actual nature. It's all on him.


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Thanks guys. This really helps. Internet hugs for all! *hugs*

It also helps to know that I'm not the only person out there who had panic attacks while coming out, strangely.

And, yeah, I suppose I should talk to my parents about the... transitioning counselor? No idea what the proper name for it is... Anyways, its their job to determine whether I should start taking hormones, so it'll help them too if they know that a professional is giving their opinion on it. Did that make sense?


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You did it.

One of the most powerful sentences in the English language, and it applies here, in full.

Make them as much of a part of the process as you are comfortable.

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder PF Special Edition, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
bdk86 wrote:
LazarX wrote:
Trekkie90909 wrote:
Were I to integrate it into a PFS-type setting I might start by figuring out how the elixir of sex shifting came about in-game.

Presumably the first sex-shiftng elixir was invented by a jaded Taldoran alchemist looking for a new diversion. It has since come into the attention of others who have different needs and reasons for obtaining one. Those needs can vary from folks who feel mistakenly gendered, to assassins and spies who use it to build a disguise foundation upon. While the elixir is not a full disguise, in that one might recognise the person as an opposite gender incarnation of the other it does get rid of the different gender DC modifier, when doing further work on assuming a disguise.

For some alchemists who have learned the skill of crafting these elixirs, they prove an occasional bonus to income.

I'm guessing Shelyn, Arshea, or a similar faith that encourages worshippers to explore gender and identity is more likely the source.

Arshea and Shelyn might encourage their followers to be open but given the price of the elixir, it's pretty much out of the conceivable price range for all but the richest and most decadent of their followers.


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Sorry to hear that, Doomkitten. :(

For what it's worth, one strategy I've encountered for dealing with the whole "it's just a phase" thing is to milk it for all its worth. I'm not exactly sure what would be liberating for you, but for other trans* people I've met it was things like putting on make-up, changing their outfits to be more "them" and the like. Basically, just start experimenting with things you were too afraid to try out before now. If they walk in on you trying out different lipsticks or whatever, they'll just sigh and roll their eyes because "it's just a phase."

In the meantime, you are using that time to learn more about yourself without stressing out or having to hide things.

Getting your mom's boyfriend to shift gears from "it's just a phase" to "My girlfriend has a trans* kid" is the harder part, but all the time you'll spend figuring out what works for you and what doesn't, is going to give you the confidence to say "This is who I am." It's not going to be easy, but sometimes in life it pays to make the most out of a less than ideal situation.

If he's not accepting this right off the bat, don't waste your time trying to convince him. Go and do all the things you were afraid of doing. You did a really brave thing. Make it count. :)

Silver Crusade System Administrator

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The Doomkitten wrote:

It also helps to know that I'm not the only person out there who had panic attacks while coming out, strangely.

First of all, congrats on taking a big step! It's super hard and it gets a little easier afterwards.

I had panic attacks constantly. I transitioned in Oklahoma which is not a state known for it's kindness to people like me. During a portion when I was not out and really just getting started, I was working on a website about transissues and forgot to turn it off on my laptop before coming to work. About 30 minutes before I had to leave, I got a message from one of our system admins that I should probably turn off my web server. I went home that night and didn't sleep and called in sick the next day. The day after I got an email from one of my friends at the office. It helped ease me a lot and it all ended up working out but it was definitely one of the most stressful days of my life.

You are not alone. ^_^ It's pretty natural to be scared especially about how things will go.


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Limeylongears wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:
... as an example of experience from my own transition. There is value in doing things the hard way and in this case, that's experience.
I learned to zip my fly slowly, as a lad. I have nothing but sympathy for those who are going through a crash course.

Button flies! They stay done up, and you can't snag anything in them!

Try singing it to the tune of 'Goldfinger'. It almost scans.

sweatpants. Metal teeth in that area are a non starter who the heck came up with THAT idea....


BigNorseWolf wrote:
Limeylongears wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:
... as an example of experience from my own transition. There is value in doing things the hard way and in this case, that's experience.
I learned to zip my fly slowly, as a lad. I have nothing but sympathy for those who are going through a crash course.

Button flies! They stay done up, and you can't snag anything in them!

Try singing it to the tune of 'Goldfinger'. It almost scans.

sweatpants. Metal teeth in that area are a non starter who the heck came up with THAT idea....

people who apparently weren't satisfied with the idea of overlapping flaps of cloth + possible button serving as a fly.


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Aniuś the Talewise wrote:
BigNorseWolf wrote:
Limeylongears wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:
... as an example of experience from my own transition. There is value in doing things the hard way and in this case, that's experience.
I learned to zip my fly slowly, as a lad. I have nothing but sympathy for those who are going through a crash course.

Button flies! They stay done up, and you can't snag anything in them!

Try singing it to the tune of 'Goldfinger'. It almost scans.

sweatpants. Metal teeth in that area are a non starter who the heck came up with THAT idea....
people who apparently weren't satisfied with the idea of overlapping flaps of cloth + possible button serving as a fly.

It's all an Illuminati Plot to bring in a One World Government controlled behind the scenes by zipper manufacturers.


Lissa Guillet wrote:

The Elixir of Sex Shift is handy and a certain percentage might find a way to get them but there are plenty of other means to transition and often provides for a more interesting story and or character. At least in my opinion. Alchemical hormones is a slower more nuanced approach and one that has been employed for centuries. Also, Elixer of Sex Shift might not be for everybody even if it can be afforded, though it's pretty expensive all things considered.

I would note that it is also not an either or. One could transition on alchemical hormones and later on get an elixir of sex shift. It's also kind of interesting going through a second puberty. There are some experiences there that are pretty unique, like opening a door and accidently hitting your chest because aren't used to things being there and since they are developing they cause you to black out. With an elixir, I imagine you just come in as developed as you are. For most adults, that's likely going to mean you'll completely skip the uber-painful stage. =)

Most painful stage for me was going up a bra size in 4-5 weeks as my first symptom of pregnancy....


Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:

The Elixir of Sex Shift is handy and a certain percentage might find a way to get them but there are plenty of other means to transition and often provides for a more interesting story and or character. At least in my opinion. Alchemical hormones is a slower more nuanced approach and one that has been employed for centuries. Also, Elixer of Sex Shift might not be for everybody even if it can be afforded, though it's pretty expensive all things considered.

I would note that it is also not an either or. One could transition on alchemical hormones and later on get an elixir of sex shift. It's also kind of interesting going through a second puberty. There are some experiences there that are pretty unique, like opening a door and accidently hitting your chest because aren't used to things being there and since they are developing they cause you to black out. With an elixir, I imagine you just come in as developed as you are. For most adults, that's likely going to mean you'll completely skip the uber-painful stage. =)

Most painful stage for me was going up a bra size in 4-5 weeks as my first symptom of pregnancy....

O.O

Wow.


Freehold DM wrote:
Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:

The Elixir of Sex Shift is handy and a certain percentage might find a way to get them but there are plenty of other means to transition and often provides for a more interesting story and or character. At least in my opinion. Alchemical hormones is a slower more nuanced approach and one that has been employed for centuries. Also, Elixer of Sex Shift might not be for everybody even if it can be afforded, though it's pretty expensive all things considered.

I would note that it is also not an either or. One could transition on alchemical hormones and later on get an elixir of sex shift. It's also kind of interesting going through a second puberty. There are some experiences there that are pretty unique, like opening a door and accidently hitting your chest because aren't used to things being there and since they are developing they cause you to black out. With an elixir, I imagine you just come in as developed as you are. For most adults, that's likely going to mean you'll completely skip the uber-painful stage. =)

Most painful stage for me was going up a bra size in 4-5 weeks as my first symptom of pregnancy....

O.O

Wow.

if I needed the toilet during the night, I had to cup them and walk slowly or it hurt too much. :)


Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:

The Elixir of Sex Shift is handy and a certain percentage might find a way to get them but there are plenty of other means to transition and often provides for a more interesting story and or character. At least in my opinion. Alchemical hormones is a slower more nuanced approach and one that has been employed for centuries. Also, Elixer of Sex Shift might not be for everybody even if it can be afforded, though it's pretty expensive all things considered.

I would note that it is also not an either or. One could transition on alchemical hormones and later on get an elixir of sex shift. It's also kind of interesting going through a second puberty. There are some experiences there that are pretty unique, like opening a door and accidently hitting your chest because aren't used to things being there and since they are developing they cause you to black out. With an elixir, I imagine you just come in as developed as you are. For most adults, that's likely going to mean you'll completely skip the uber-painful stage. =)

Most painful stage for me was going up a bra size in 4-5 weeks as my first symptom of pregnancy....

O.O

Wow.

if I needed the toilet during the night, I had to cup them and walk slowly or it hurt too much. :)

O.O

Silver Crusade

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Limeylongears wrote:
Aniuś the Talewise wrote:
BigNorseWolf wrote:
Limeylongears wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:
... as an example of experience from my own transition. There is value in doing things the hard way and in this case, that's experience.
I learned to zip my fly slowly, as a lad. I have nothing but sympathy for those who are going through a crash course.

Button flies! They stay done up, and you can't snag anything in them!

Try singing it to the tune of 'Goldfinger'. It almost scans.

sweatpants. Metal teeth in that area are a non starter who the heck came up with THAT idea....
people who apparently weren't satisfied with the idea of overlapping flaps of cloth + possible button serving as a fly.
It's all an Illuminati Plot to bring in a One World Government controlled behind the scenes by zipper manufacturers.

Not far from the truth, given that Japanese manufacturer YKK makes 90% of all the zippers in the world.

Shadow Lodge

The Doomkitten wrote:

Well.

Coming out happened.

I don't know if what happened during it added up to make it a bad one, or a good one, but I guess I'll summarize.

** spoiler omitted **...

It takes some time to sink in. Hopefully he'll come around to fully understand; but never doubt yourself just because somebody doesn't quite understand yet.

Shadow Lodge

Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:

...

Most painful stage for me was going up a bra size in 4-5 weeks as my first symptom of pregnancy....

O.O

Wow.

if I needed the toilet during the night, I had to cup them and walk slowly or it hurt too much. :)

O_o Ouch.

Why do I have a feeling that the only thing that bothered you more than the pain and discomfort was the unwanted attention from some people?


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Usual Suspect wrote:
Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:

...

Most painful stage for me was going up a bra size in 4-5 weeks as my first symptom of pregnancy....

O.O

Wow.

if I needed the toilet during the night, I had to cup them and walk slowly or it hurt too much. :)

O_o Ouch.

Why do I have a feeling that the only thing that bothered you more than the pain and discomfort was the unwanted attention from some people?

>_>

<_<

Don't know what you're talking about.

Silver Crusade System Administrator

Hormones are weird. =) They'll mess you up.

Liberty's Edge

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Biology is weird and horribly messy. It's already messed you, any you, up in subtle and profound ways.

It makes me wonder how anyone can believe in intelligent design.


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Just because it's intelligent doesn't mean there isn't a measure of sadism behind it.


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Aniuś the Talewise wrote:
BigNorseWolf wrote:
Limeylongears wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Lissa Guillet wrote:
... as an example of experience from my own transition. There is value in doing things the hard way and in this case, that's experience.
I learned to zip my fly slowly, as a lad. I have nothing but sympathy for those who are going through a crash course.

Button flies! They stay done up, and you can't snag anything in them!

Try singing it to the tune of 'Goldfinger'. It almost scans.

sweatpants. Metal teeth in that area are a non starter who the heck came up with THAT idea....
people who apparently weren't satisfied with the idea of overlapping flaps of cloth + possible button serving as a fly.

Any decent pants have overlapping flaps of cloth between the metal teeth and the business parts.


Krensky wrote:

Biology is weird and horribly messy. It's already messed you, any you, up in subtle and profound ways.

It makes me wonder how anyone can believe in intelligent design.

Well... When one does not believe that the creation or the creator is perfect or benevolent...

Liberty's Edge

Drejk wrote:
Krensky wrote:

Biology is weird and horribly messy. It's already messed you, any you, up in subtle and profound ways.

It makes me wonder how anyone can believe in intelligent design.

Well... When one does not believe that the creation or the creator is perfect or benevolent...

True, but pretty much everyone pushing that idea does, so the argument is sorta moot.


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Lissa Guillet wrote:
The Doomkitten wrote:

It also helps to know that I'm not the only person out there who had panic attacks while coming out, strangely.

First of all, congrats on taking a big step! It's super hard and it gets a little easier afterwards.

I had panic attacks constantly. I transitioned in Oklahoma which is not a state known for it's kindness to people like me. During a portion when I was not out and really just getting started, I was working on a website about transissues and forgot to turn it off on my laptop before coming to work. About 30 minutes before I had to leave, I got a message from one of our system admins that I should probably turn off my web server. I went home that night and didn't sleep and called in sick the next day. The day after I got an email from one of my friends at the office. It helped ease me a lot and it all ended up working out but it was definitely one of the most stressful days of my life.

You are not alone. ^_^ It's pretty natural to be scared especially about how things will go.

Wow. Thank you for sharing that letter. While I'm not going through any of those issues, seeing what he wrote to you restored a bit of my faith in humanity.

I have an aquaintence starting her transition and have watched her struggle with all that comes with it through Facebook. I've decided today that I'm going to contact her and offer to file her name change with the courts pro bono when she's ready.


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For the record, I've gone "commando" for years in all but my dress clothes and I've never had a mishap. It just takes practice.

Silver Crusade System Administrator

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MeanDM wrote:

Wow. Thank you for sharing that letter. While I'm not going through any of those issues, seeing what he wrote to you restored a bit of my faith in humanity.

I have an aquaintence starting her transition and have watched her struggle with all that comes with it through Facebook. I've decided today that I'm going to contact her and offer to file her name change with the courts pro bono when she's ready.

Nice! That's a lovely gesture. I had to do that on my own but the judge, while completely unable to look me in the eye, was nice enough. =) It took a lot of research and tracking down info to write the request.


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Keep this up, we'll have to call you SweetDM.

Silver Crusade

Chief Cook and Bottlewasher wrote:
if I needed the toilet during the night, I had to cup them and walk slowly or it hurt too much. :)

...I hate to see a woman doing a man's job...!

(I'm joking! Please don't kill me!)


So, I got diagnosed with Aspergers and ADHD some time ago, and have just started medicating for the ADHD. But, I've gotten thinking, is there some kind of correlation between being LGBT and being neurodivergent? It seems like nearly everyone neurotypical I know is straight, and nearly every autistic person or with ADHD is ace, gay or bi (I don't think I know any straight trans people).

Googling around it doesn't seem like there's any established link; a single study showed some correlation but it's too small to make any conclusion based on it. but I talked to an acquaintance in Norway who had the same experience. Have you noticed some kind of correlation like that?

Contributor

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Gaberlunzie wrote:

So, I got diagnosed with Aspergers and ADHD some time ago, and have just started medicating for the ADHD. But, I've gotten thinking, is there some kind of correlation between being LGBT and being neurodivergent? It seems like nearly everyone neurotypical I know is straight, and nearly every autistic person or with ADHD is ace, gay or bi (I don't think I know any straight trans people).

Googling around it doesn't seem like there's any established link; a single study showed some correlation but it's too small to make any conclusion based on it. but I talked to an acquaintance in Norway who had the same experience. Have you noticed some kind of correlation like that?

Totally outside my area of expertise, but it's tempting to suspect that there might be some shared causes. I'm not up on the literature though, and only going on my own experience and selection biased anecdotes.

Here's the most recent paper I've seen: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4345542/


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One thing to keep in mind when it comes to studies relating LGBTQ+ folk and X or Y subject: those are only the self-identifying LGBTQ+ folk. There are an unknowable number of LGBTQ+ folk out there who, for their own individual reasons, have chosen not to identify with any label other than "straight" and "cis".

As for the other bit, it's also entirely possible that neurodivergent people feel more comfortable accepting themselves for who they are. Neurotypical people would have no event that forces them to acknowledge that they are different from the rest, so they would find it easier to deny or hide their sexual orientation (or even, perhaps, their gender identity) if it diverged from the norm.


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What is interesting is that if you consider the profiles of people with ASD, they have a profile of interests that is more typically male. This goes for both men and women with ASD. Why this is is as far as I know unknown.

Just to speculate, I would say that with a huge common culture with serious expectations on how you ought to live your life, and with the severely applied punishment for not conforming to that culture, comes a certain consequence: If being "different" carries a cost, but being "more different" isn't necessarily much worse, it will be easier for someone who already can't conform to choose to conform even less than for someone who has the choice to conform to start not doing so.


Basically, what I mean to say (as Sissyl more eloquently put it), is that the correlation may not be "more likely to be LGBTQ+" but "more likely to admit to being LGBTQ+."


Gaberlunzie wrote:
So, I got diagnosed with Aspergers and ADHD some time ago, and have just started medicating for the ADHD. But, I've gotten thinking, is there some kind of correlation between being LGBT and being neurodivergent? It seems like nearly everyone neurotypical I know is straight, and nearly every autistic person or with ADHD is ace, gay or bi (I don't think I know any straight trans people).

I ahem, may have had a few reasons for poking around in some of the links between those. A few random thoughts on the matter...

ADHD isn't A thing. Its many different things and varieties.(many of which while inconvenient to the modern educational system and office environment, have an occurrence rate high enough to be pretty normal)

If you have Aspergers chances are pretty good that you just don't find people all that interesting. People just don't click with you on an emotional level to engage your interests. That includes the teacher trying to maintain your attention on a whole lot of really boring stuff. Without that emotional connection you're more likely to put your mind elsewhere.

Apsergers has also been described as a very male brain. Males are particularly prone to ADHD. It would make sense that a brain even more strongly wired that way would be more prone to it.

Likewise without that connection going off you're less likely to be really engaged with people and get twitterpated. Imagine someone that's the gender of your usual amorous interests but that you have no sexual interest in. Then imagine that everyone is boring like that.

To top it off if you don't like being touched the thought of touching/being touched in a sexual matter = a creepy feeling = negative feedback= less likely to be interested in sex. Its kind of like having an internal shock collar for that subject matter.


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Speaking as someone on the autistic spectrum, I know it's much more likely that you will be male, in need of glasses and/or have one or more physical or sensory intolerances, such as food allergies or sensitivity to loud noise. I don't believe that your chance of hanging out in this thread is significantly affected, however.

I can definitely agree with BNW on quickly losing interest in people or things that don't engage you. For me, intimate relations is highly likely to be one of those things too.

Silver Crusade

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One's observation of this may also be skewed by one's circle of acquaintances. I wouldn't be surprised to find like-minded neurodivergent LGBTQ people gravitating toward one another, and more neurotypical LGBTQ people doing the same. We do tend to seek out groups of friends who are like us in certain ways. If one found oneself in the former circle acquaintances, it would be easy to speculate that most LGBTQ people are neurodivergent.

My own experience (again anecdotal) is that most of my neurodivergent friends and acquaintances are het-cis, and most of my LGBTQ acquaintances are not, to my knowledge, neurodivergent.


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BigNorseWolf wrote:
Apsergers has also been described as a very male brain. Males are particularly prone to ADHD. It would make sense that a brain even more strongly wired that way would be more prone to it.

the idea that autism is a 'male brain' is an outdated pseudo-science, I'm afraid. "aspergers" is also no longer a diagnosis as of the DSM-V. the idea that a separate form of autism existed called 'aspergers' was mistaken and appears to be an artifact of two separate professors (Hans Asperger being one of them) making separate studies of autism and giving their observations different names. In reality they were studying the same disability.

also, it isn't that males are more likely to have adhd, it's that females tend to be underdiagnosed. girls tend to be socialized to remain quieter than boys, as a result their symptoms manifest as daydreaming or whatnot and are more easily missed. the fact that adhd has had a history of being stereotyped as 'rowdy problem student" hasn't helped either (seeing as the socialization of boys tends to encourage them to be such and the socialization of girls frames it as not a possibility), but I think it has gotten better in recent years (too recent for those adults who were diagnosed as kids or missed that chance, unfortunately).


I tend to not get along with people who are both straight and neurotypical, and have had too many bad experiences with such people. And as for the ones who are nice, it is usually simply not meant to be, we have nothing in common besides possible interests, and even then overlap is a lot less likely than with people who are lgbtq or neurodivergent.


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Given that "the autistic spectrum" is a thing, suggesting that Asperger's is just the same as autism is not very helpful. Whilst the DSM is very influential, that hardly means that its authors have the last say on matters they cover. It's rather like saying that two shades of red describe the same colour, therefore one shade of red should no longer exist because it's unnecessary for it to do so.


Pathfinder Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

This does raise an interesting thought, though.

Not sure how you would boil it down scientifically, but for the hypothetical...

What if someone could narrow down a good portion of mental illness as not being 'illness' of the 'self' but rather an expression of 'self-wellness'?

And concurrently, what if actualizing the self reduced the mental stress and trauma both for a given patient and their surroundings?

NOTE: Not a medical professional, using English terms I think mean what I'm trying to say, if I've used some in error please let me know?


i might just be biased due to an incredibly bad personal experience with the word 'aspergers' but I see no point in the word's existence when it is already clear that there is an infinite myriad ways of being autistic, more ways than there are words for them.

the DSM still considers autism to be a spectrum, it just doesn't use the aspergers diagnosis anymore. good riddance in my opinion.


Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


This does raise an interesting thought, though.

Not sure how you would boil it down scientifically, but for the hypothetical...

What if someone could narrow down a good portion of mental illness as not being 'illness' of the 'self' but rather an expression of 'self-wellness'?

And concurrently, what if actualizing the self reduced the mental stress and trauma both for a given patient and their surroundings?

NOTE: Not a medical professional, using English terms I think mean what I'm trying to say, if I've used some in error please let me know?

could you rephrase that? I don't understand what you're trying to say.

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