Here's hoping for better days, SunshineGrrrl
:ahoy:
I'm not sure exactly the context but an old guy at the table next to us mentioned transvestite. It might have been about us or it might not have been
The old guy, even if he was talking about your group, could have been saying "I think they are transgender not transvestites" or may not know the difference. Or he could be an offensive ignorant twit.
Sorry to hear about the delay in your planned surgery. That is a major bummer and i hope things work out.
Sooo some insurance things are changing and while it may or may not be a bad thing it's put me in a really bad head space as I now have to postpone for a few weeks my preapproval for surgery that I've been waiting to get for over 20 years. Also, I'm not sure exactly the context but an old guy at the table next to us mentioned transvestite. It might have been about us or it might not have been but combined it's really hard to live in my skin today.
I am sorry to hear that Lissa=(
Here, have all the hugs; *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *hug* *huuuuuuuuuuuuug*
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Here's hoping it is a pause for breath on an arduous journey and nothing more, sunshine.
I'd like some advice.
As I mentioned, in my other post, I am a straight guy, from a conservative part of the country. Hell, on the surface, I come off as a straight-up redneck. I'd like to know, how I can help in having a discussion on transgender issues with people around here.
Despite, the stereotypes of intolerance in the Midwest, a lot of people here are not intolerant, just ignorant. They don't have a bigoted bone in their body, they just don't even know that being gay, and being transgendered are completely different. From reading other posts here, I'm uniformed myself on some issues. What is a good resource for educating?
What's the best way of responding when the topic comes up, without sounding like I'm pontificating from a cue card? The last time a transgender topic came up, it almost became a brawl, because my friend was pissed I got in his face for using the word "tranny".
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Well that is a bad word in our community. Your friend probably doesn't understand that and that's kind of fine. There have been a lot of discussions on the word even in the community. I would steer clear of that particular word and use trans or transgender. I come from the southwest and had to teach my gamer friends who were my best friends all about it. They were also almost universally in the armed forces so it was a little hard for some of them to swallow but they bucked up like the good guys they are and made the effort.
For that particular issue, I would just note that, that word is a common slang. It refers most often to transgender porn. It is also often the world yelled at us across the street when someone is trying to make fun of us. It's also sometimes last word someone hears before waking up in the hospital or occasionally not waking up in the hospital. It has extremely negative connotations and I feel should generally be avoided. The drag community kind of wants to "take it back" I guess but they largely get to take their makeup off at the end of the night and have to deal with those particular consequences a little less.
If you have specific questions, you can always pm me.
I had used the word tranny on this thread and I got a message from Big Norse Wolf which told me it was offensive. I don't think it has the same meaning in Australia, where its used as trans is in the US.
But maybe I am wrong. I had a close friend who was trans but lost contact with them 32 years ago, as has her whole family. That is plenty of time for things to change. And I have little if any contact with trans people except, well here.
On porn, I can only recall TV/TS or maybe its the other way round. Which always seems to refer to a person with both a penis and breasts, and a young, attractive and aroused one at that. This kind of thing must get very old very fast for trans people. It makes you wonder how straight some people who consume straight porn are though.
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There is really no such thing as straight porn. At least not in the XXX movie variety. The standard formula always includes the obligatory lesbian scene that transforms midway into a threesome with two women and one guy (supposedly every straight guy's fantasy, to "cure" a couple lesbians).
So there is bisexual porn, but no truly straight porn.
And don't pick on me for knowing that. One of my college friends did several classes on film theory; and I like porn. Can't help myself.
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There is really no such thing as straight porn. At least not in the XXX movie variety. The standard formula always includes the obligatory lesbian scene that transforms midway into a threesome with two women and one guy (supposedly every straight guy's fantasy, to "cure" a couple lesbians).
So there is bisexual porn, but no truly straight porn.
And don't pick on me for knowing that. One of my college friends did several classes on film theory; and I like porn. Can't help myself.
I respectfully disagree. Most porn's "lesbian" scenes are entirely designed for titillation of straight guys. Having seen actual lesbian porn, it's woefully apparent.
Bisexual porn is a lot more fun than straight porn, anyway.
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There is really no such thing as straight porn. At least not in the XXX movie variety. The standard formula always includes the obligatory lesbian scene that transforms midway into a threesome with two women and one guy (supposedly every straight guy's fantasy, to "cure" a couple lesbians).
So there is bisexual porn, but no truly straight porn.
And don't pick on me for knowing that. One of my college friends did several classes on film theory; and I like porn. Can't help myself.
I respectfully disagree. Most porn's "lesbian" scenes are entirely designed for titillation of straight guys. Having seen actual lesbian porn, it's woefully apparent.
Bisexual porn is a lot more fun than straight porn, anyway.
Agreed.
As someone whose Tumblr consists of Erotic Artists (as well as Wes and Jessica's) and who watches and reads a lot of pornographic and erotic works I can safely say there's lesbian porn, and then there's porn with lesbians in it.
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As someone whose Tumblr consists of Erotic Artists (as well as Wes and Jessica's) and who watches and reads a lot of pornographic and erotic works I can safely say there's lesbian porn, and then there's porn with lesbians in it.
I can't really disagree with that. But since my point was that what is commonly referred to as straight porn is does not exclusivity portray straight sex (even if portraying fantasies of supposedly straight people) my comment still stands.
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I had used the word ****** on this thread and I got a message from Big Norse Wolf which told me it was offensive. I don't think it has the same meaning in Australia, where its used as trans is in the US.
I have a good friend in Australia who disagrees. It's a hateful word and you probably shouldn't use it.
Sorry I had no idea until Big Norse Wolf told me.
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There is really no such thing as straight porn. At least not in the XXX movie variety. The standard formula always includes the obligatory lesbian scene that transforms midway into a threesome with two women and one guy (supposedly every straight guy's fantasy, to "cure" a couple lesbians).
So there is bisexual porn, but no truly straight porn.
And don't pick on me for knowing that. One of my college friends did several classes on film theory; and I like porn. Can't help myself.
? I have tons of straight porn. And at least one with lesbians in it. And one with Transgender folks in it. Most on vhs.
Anyone remember vhs?
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No... was that like Netflix?
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I'm old enough to remember thinking that VHS 300s were awesome, because they had five hours of recording time on them.
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On porn, I can only recall TV/TS or maybe its the other way round. Which always seems to refer to a person with both a penis and breasts, and a young, attractive and aroused one at that. This kind of thing must get very old very fast for trans people.
Uh, yes. Very offensive, we trans people hate that kind of thing.
*deletes browser history*
And now there is no evidence I don't, I mean we don't.
I'm old enough to remember thinking that VHS 300s were awesome, because they had five hours of recording time on them.
Five hours?! I usually had vhs that held between hour and half and three hours...
My mother generally used 180s and 240s, but I'm sure she had at least one 300.
On porn, I can only recall TV/TS or maybe its the other way round. Which always seems to refer to a person with both a penis and breasts, and a young, attractive and aroused one at that. This kind of thing must get very old very fast for trans people.
Uh, yes. Very offensive, we trans people hate that kind of thing.
*deletes browser history*
And now there is no evidence I don't, I mean we don't.
I can proudly defend my one trans folk porn tape by saying noone is attractive or young. Well, maybe one person is. Lots are aroused, though. The name of the video itself is offensive, however.
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On porn, I can only recall TV/TS or maybe its the other way round. Which always seems to refer to a person with both a penis and breasts, and a young, attractive and aroused one at that. This kind of thing must get very old very fast for trans people.
Uh, yes. Very offensive, we trans people hate that kind of thing.
*deletes browser history*
And now there is no evidence I don't, I mean we don't.
also, as a cyclist, I face serious injury on an almost daily basis. I also watch/view/read a lot of porn. I am working on an app that will delete your browsing history the moment you have to call 911.
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No... was that like Netflix?
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No... was that like Netflix?
You are giving cars for Christmas?!
Damn. I don't have driving license...
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No... was that like Netflix?You are giving cars for Christmas?!
Damn. I don't have driving license...
well, I was gonna go all Oprah and be like, "look under the thread! You're getting a car! And you're getting a car and you're getting a car and you're getting a car!"
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I'm new here, both to this particular thread and to the Paizo forums in general. I'm jumping in because I'm so darn EXCITED to see this post here.
I'm bisexual, though most of my players and family aren't aware of it. Being married and monogamous, it largely doesn't come into conversation much, so I let sleeping dogs lie.
Except when it comes to games. I both play and GM (Pathfinder rules, mostly homebrew setting) and for my character building, I use utterly elaborate sexual orientation and gender identification charts to define the sexuality and gender of my characters and NPCs. I've broken it down by cultural area and race, too. I've spent what some people might call an abnormal amount of time thinking about how my characters relate to sex and gender.
For an upcoming game I'm GMing, I've already asked my players to define their character's sexuality on the Kinsey scale (or to include a complete backstory explaining their asexuality, if they choose). Part of it is because my brother-in-law is playing a female socially-licensed prostitute and I want all the players and characters to have decided beforehand how they might feel about being in close quarters with her for long periods of time.
I'm including elements of orientation and gender identity in a game for teens I run with our local library, too. The kids don't know this because they haven't talked with her extensively, but I have a transgendered cleric in town; she was born male but when she answered her god's call, she was granted a body which reflects her identity. It's caused her to be a little neurotic about adhering to her clerical calling for fear the god will take back the blessing if she proves a disappointment.
Something I read on Tumblr a while back really emphasizes how I feel about gender identity and sexuality inclusion in fantasy games: it's hard to escape onto a world if you don't see elements of yourself reflected there. It's true of books, visual media, and games, any escapist media. It's why it's important to me to include LGBT characters in my fantasy worlds; if I can make the world, I'm going to make it reflective of how I think the world should be. So my games include gay characters, trans characters (both those with a deific blessing and those without), straight characters, asexual characters. I want to see a world where these things aren't an issue and where differences are embraced rather than reviled.
...and I'll shut up now. Hello, I'm happy to be here.
Good to see ya! :D
Welcome to the club! BI REPRESENT *double knuckle pound with bisexual tattooed on the knuckles*
(that's not actually a thing I have but I'm kinda tempted.)
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Welcome to the club! BI REPRESENT *double knuckle pound with bisexual tattooed on the knuckles*
(that's not actually a thing I have but I'm kinda tempted.)
It's nice to not feel alone. :) When my gaming group is all either family who don't know my orientation or kids with whom it's inappropriate discussion, it's nice to have a place to talk about gaming and how sexuality affects it.
I had used the word tranny on this thread and I got a message from Big Norse Wolf which told me it was offensive. I don't think it has the same meaning in Australia, where its used as trans is in the US.
But maybe I am wrong. I had a close friend who was trans but lost contact with them 32 years ago, as has her whole family. That is plenty of time for things to change. And I have little if any contact with trans people except, well here.
On porn, I can only recall TV/TS or maybe its the other way round. Which always seems to refer to a person with both a penis and breasts, and a young, attractive and aroused one at that. This kind of thing must get very old very fast for trans people. It makes you wonder how straight some people who consume straight porn are though.
I'm Australian and the word 'tranny' is not offensive. And Generation X and below in Australia generally don't have the prejudice shared by the older generation or by more conservative countries.
So the division of language is less needed.
I have a good friend in Australia who disagrees. It's a hateful word and you probably shouldn't use it.
That is what I thought, Morzadian. But see the quote.
Certainly in the US the term is a bit like calling a black person a n####,at least for younger people, so its an emotional topic. Me I am not going to use the term any more just in case.
I hope you are right about the lack of prejudice in Australia. I know things have improved a lot, that far?
I have a good friend in Australia who disagrees. It's a hateful word and you probably shouldn't use it.That is what I thought, Morzadian. But see the quote.
Certainly in the US the term is a bit like calling a black person a n####,at least for younger people, so its an emotional topic. Me I am not going to use the term any more just in case.
I hope you are right about the lack of prejudice in Australia. I know things have improved a lot, that far?
Yeah I can see you point, and I don't want to offend people either. Especially as I'm not prejudice against anyone.
Against LGBT yes things have improved vastly, our national broadcaster the ABC is left-wing and pro-gay rights and the Mardi Gras has become mainstream.
With generational shift there has been massive change, but still a long way to go.
Edit: Australia also has Carlotta (Trans) and she is a national treasure. Something other countries don't have especially something so public, historical and widely accepted.
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With all due respect, and meaning no offense, I don't believe it is your place to say what is "no longer offensive".
Please understand that it is very difficult to understand just how painful this sort of thing can be from the outside, and that just because someone does not object does not mean they weren't hurt.
I believe that you do mean well, so please don't take offense.
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With all due respect, and meaning no offense, I don't believe it is your place to say what is "no longer offensive".
Please understand that it is very difficult to understand just how painful this sort of thing can be from the outside, and that just because someone does not object does not mean they weren't hurt.
I believe that you do mean well, so please don't take offense.
Joynt's comments were not meant to offend, that was the point I was driving at.
Totally agree Kalindlara.
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also, as a cyclist, I face serious injury on an almost daily basis. I also watch/view/read a lot of porn. I am working on an app that will delete your browsing history the moment you have to call 911.
On porn, I can only recall TV/TS or maybe its the other way round. Which always seems to refer to a person with both a penis and breasts, and a young, attractive and aroused one at that. This kind of thing must get very old very fast for trans people.
Uh, yes. Very offensive, we trans people hate that kind of thing.
*deletes browser history*
And now there is no evidence I don't, I mean we don't.
If something happens to me, and someone checks my browser history, they are going to find a goodly amount of gay porn. And I don't worry about that, since no one will be shocked to find out that CH likes to watch hot men having sex...
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I don't think porn's alignment is determined by volume.
Good aligned porn shows consenting adults enjoying sex.
Evil aligned porn is exploitative, cruel or involves children.
Lawful porn conforms to one sexual taste.
Chaotic porn is more eclectic.
The description of Celestial Healer's porn sounds like it would be Lawful Good Gay porn.
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I don't think porn's alignment is determined by volume.
Good aligned porn shows consenting adults enjoying sex.
Evil aligned porn is exploitative, cruel or involves children.
Lawful porn conforms to one sexual taste.
Chaotic porn is more eclectic.
The description of Celestial Healer's porn sounds like it would be Lawful Good Gay porn.
Which means it would be PFS legal!
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I don't think porn's alignment is determined by volume.
Good aligned porn shows consenting adults enjoying sex.
Evil aligned porn is exploitative, cruel or involves children.
Lawful porn conforms to one sexual taste.
Chaotic porn is more eclectic.
The description of Celestial Healer's porn sounds like it would be Lawful Good Gay porn.
STEAMY PALADIN ON PALADIN ACTION.
LAY ON HANDS ONE... MORE... TIME, SIR LANCELOT.
YOU KNOW YOU'VE REACHED SEVENTH HEAVEN WHEN YOU GET TO MOUNT CELESTIA.
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YOU KNOW YOU'VE REACHED SEVENTH HEAVEN WHEN YOU GET TO MOUNT CELESTIA.
You are terrible, Limey. :p
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I don't think porn's alignment is determined by volume.
Good aligned porn shows consenting adults enjoying sex.
Evil aligned porn is exploitative, cruel or involves children.
Lawful porn conforms to one sexual taste.
Chaotic porn is more eclectic.
The description of Celestial Healer's porn sounds like it would be Lawful Good Gay porn.
STEAMY PALADIN ON PALADIN ACTION.
LAY ON HANDS ONE... MORE... TIME, SIR LANCELOT.
YOU KNOW YOU'VE REACHED SEVENTH HEAVEN WHEN YOU GET TO MOUNT CELESTIA.
So about that daily Obedience...
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I don't think porn's alignment is determined by volume.
Good aligned porn shows consenting adults enjoying sex.
Evil aligned porn is exploitative, cruel or involves children.
Lawful porn conforms to one sexual taste.
Chaotic porn is more eclectic.
The description of Celestial Healer's porn sounds like it would be Lawful Good Gay porn.
STEAMY PALADIN ON PALADIN ACTION.
LAY ON HANDS ONE... MORE... TIME, SIR LANCELOT.
YOU KNOW YOU'VE REACHED SEVENTH HEAVEN WHEN YOU GET TO MOUNT CELESTIA.
So about that daily Obedience...
Don't forget Lymnieris!
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I actually had a great time roleplaying an aasimar sorcerer devoted to Lymnieris. What great memories!
Right now I have a satyr sorcerer devoted to Desna and Chadali who fills a similar function. Plus a psionic half-orc chaladin. For some reason I just can't resist making all my high-Cha dudes scantly-clad flirts. It just fits! XD
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I actually had a great time roleplaying an aasimar sorcerer devoted to Lymnieris. What great memories!
Right now I have a satyr sorcerer devoted to Desna and Chadali who fills a similar function. Plus a psionic half-orc chaladin. For some reason I just can't resist making all my high-Cha dudes scantly-clad flirts. It just fits! XD
I routinely min/max for Charisma, which amuses my husband (since I often end up with low Wisdom instead). He says it reflects me pretty well: pretty and able to win someone's attention, but with a bad habit of putting my foot in my mouth without having a clue as to why.