Its "A" Dungeon (Inactive)

Game Master Terquem

Fort save, because our dorf is ridiculi: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

"Warn an elf before you do something like that!"

Teirist coughs and his eyes water as he moves forward even more.

Ballar, laughing at the wizard's reaction to the spicy nacho, grabs a handful himself, Oh, sorry Teirist, just try not to rub ya eyes lad, Stuffing them into his mouth, the dwarf's eye's widen and his face turns crimson red. A second later his eyes well over and his nose opens up like a tap. Fanning his mouth and tongue, Ballar puts down his pack and starts rummaging around for some water.

Spicy Nacho Challenge: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (15) + 6 = 21
Time spent drooling: 1d4 ⇒ 4

Day 6, turn 73 (approximate time of day, 11:50 am) (turn 1 of 6)

Moving quickly, but cautiously down the newly discovered stairs to the fifth level of the Dungeon, the party takes a quick break, and decides to try and enjoy a unique blend of nacho seasoning, with somewhat disastrous results…

The party is credited with a ten minute break

When everyone has sufficiently recovered from the assault of the world famous spices, Berenwyr sends a small cluster of lights to the south, and a four way intersection is revealed…

"Look Berenwyr, infinite possibilities!
For values of infinity approaching 4."

Well, technically...3, after all, the direction you are coming from is the fourth

...approaching 4."

Tierist looks back at the group and says, "All this talk of math makes me want to stab something. Can we go find something, or are you going to spend the rest of the ...day, is it still day?" He looks up at the ceiling.

"Hey, Berry, send the lights down the right hand passage please."

Jim points to the right, knowing Berry has had trouble with such things in the past.

Having had enough fun watching the wizard sweat bullets, Ballar casts prestidigitacion on his fingers and mouth, removing all traces of fiery nacho powder. As Berenwyr's lights float down the passage, the dwarf squints, straining to see what's ahead.

Perception: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (15) + 4 = 19

Phillistines, Berenwyr grumbles. I should put out the lights and leave them to find their own way out...

Nevertheless, he steps forward into the intersection and sends his lights through the right hand archway, then straight ahead, then to the left.

Berenwyr shrugs and suggests, Let's try the door.

Jim considers the door, wondering if it looks worth trapping at all.
Intuition (traps): 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (18) + 9 = 27

Rats!

Jim spots the workings of a sisniter looking trap built into the door frame. Very small holes, blackned and scorched, are well concealed in the wooden door frame, suggesting that this trap probably produces a spray of several jets of flame at anyone foolish enough to try to open the door.

Assuming Jim relates this information to the rest of us.

I've got a scroll somewhere around here the elf pats at his robes until he finds his scroll case, It'll give you some limited protection against fire, if you want to try to disarm it and you're worried about setting off the trap. He shrugs, Or we could just skip the door.

"Looks pretty dangerous. Maybe we're not ready for this level yet." Jim admits. "I bet Teirist couldn't even touch it without setting off this trap."

Berenwyr grins, Only one way to find out. Hey Teirist, come here and touch this door!

Rubs his chin, Could try'n burn down tha door...

I got nothing, just guidance and lots of acid....splash that is

Maybe I could summon something to set the trap off.

Ah don't know if sett'n it off'll help, tha door'll still be lock'd. Ballar points at the scorched areas near the frame of the door, 'Sides, don't these thangs reset?

We never seem to open much on the first crack. Move on? The door will still be here for another time.

Berenwyr shrugs, As you like it. Let's go back and try the left passage.

Berenwyr walks back to the intersection of corridors and prepares to explore the passage on the left hand side.

To be clear, the passage on the left if you're standing on the stairs and facing down.

eeek, that's a lot of mapping to update. I'll get to it tonight

As Berenwyr approaches the intersection Ballar exclaims, Listen! the dwarf pauses for a second, Do ya smell someth'n?

Jim licks the wall. "Yes, it looks like..."
...what does it feel like, Terq?

Day 6, turn 73 (approximate time of day, 11:50 am) (turn 1 of 6)

Nice reference Ballar

As Berenwyr sends a small group of lights down to passageway he they illuminate a small intersection of three Chambers. Columns, on the left , right, and ahead indicate the presence of three typical chambers.
Suddenly, the air is filled with the howling of many small monkeys, and as you all watch in horror, two groups of monkeys come pouring out of the chamber’s on the left and right. They are screaming in hostile fashion, and charging toward you. Then from the left chamber a huge four armed ape-like humanoid comes out, standing behind the charging monkeys as if it is their god.

Monkey Initiative: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (10) + 2 = 12

Initiative: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (8) + 4 = 12
"It's nice to see you again, Mrs. Feladrannil."

When do I get to kill monkeys: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (5) + 4 = 9

Got's a monkey on me back: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (17) + 1 = 18

Blimey! Ballar's eyes widen as the monkey horde advances down the hall. Taking up his silver tankard of Cayden, the dwarf's eyes go crossed and his speech begins to slur; mumbling something like, Jim! Break out tha bananas! Teirist, smear tha peanut butt'r on tha wizard! Tha should buy us some time! Finishing, Ballar puts down the holy symbol and unhooks his Dorn-Dergar. Down the hall, a ball of force on a chain materializes behind the monkey god. Swinging, the ball hurls towards the big bad monkey...
SW Att.: 1d20 + 4 + 3 ⇒ (8) + 4 + 3 = 15
SW Dmg.: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7

Jim's MAGE ARMOR was cast Day 6, turn 68 (approximate time of day, 11:10 am) so he's got 20 min left | SA casts SPIRITUAL WEAPON in the form of a smaller Dorn-Dergar/ Round 1 of 4/ Att. BAB plus Wisdom / 1d8 force damage per hit, + 1 point per three caster levels | MA prepares Dorn-Dergar |

Day 6, turn 73 (approximate time of day, 11:50 am) (turn 1 of 6)

There is little cause for humor. The cold dungeon air reverberates with the low murmur of the animal calls emanating from the south as the gathering storm of monkeys, led by their apparent “monkey-god,” make their way slowly toward the party. Their pace is controlled, deliberate, but as they advance they jump in place, slap their hands on the floor and walls, hoot and howl, filling the heroes with a sense of impending…

Ring, ring-ring

Suddenly a bicycle appears in the hall. The Dungeon minion is riding the bike. She is dressed in a smart uniform that is blue, with red trim. Her normally long hair is tucked up under a small, stiff brimmed flat-top cap that has the words “Telegraphia Perplexia” stenciled on the front.

Ballar's Magical Phantom Weapon freezes in mid air

Telegraph for Mr. Berenwyr the Dungeon minion announces with a loud voice, and the monkeys, stop, stare in disbelief, and curl their lips in disgust

The Dungeon Minion, says, Oh, excuse me, ahem, ee-ee, oh-oh-oh, eh-ee-oh

The Monkeys listen, smile and nod in understanding, stand upright, and a few of them take out cigarettes and begin taking a smoke break.

Yes, ahem The Minion takes a letter out of her jacket, as Berenwyr approaches and identifies himself.

The Minion Reads the telegraph, Mister Berenwyr, stop, have run into a slight problem, stop, seems that Jacquelyn is not only ravishingly intelligent, but also an accomplished snooker player, stop, need four thousand gold pieces in a hurry, stop, sincerely, Mister Doctor Jasper Hellispont, stop

When she finishes, she points toward the stairs, and Berenwyr sighs heavily, hikes up his robes and jogs away going up the stairs as quickly as he can

The Minion then takes another small telegram out of her jacket and reads it as two new heroes come down the stairs narrowly avoiding being trampled by the harried wizard.

Please allow these two heroes to join your party, stop, I prefer for monkey mess to be contained to as narrow an area as possible, stop, sincerely, your host, It’Dupree, stop, p.s. Teirest, please enjoy your new Goggles, stop, Am working on the glitch associated with all wishes granted within the dungeon, stop, until then, do try to encourage your old and new friends to try and die in a nicely organized pile

The Minion reaches into the basket of the bike, and hands Teirist a plain, brown paper package.

"Whe...what...huh?"

Billy looks back at the fast departing wizard, and shakes his head. "Elves."

"Ooh, there you are, pretty minion. You know, I hear the bar back upstairs have some nice specials they hide under the counter. What say you and I get..." He pauses when he sees the motley group hanging out near the monkeys. "Are you the guys I'm supposed to hang with and bail out from time to time? Name's Billy. Oh, and let me introduce you to my pet Fluffy. Hey Fluffy! Where are you? Get down the stairs and meet our new friends."

Taking a peek over at the loafing monkeys, Billy turns his attention back to the Minion while waiting for his little cat to join him. "Say, since we're taking a quick break, would it be ok if I just pull out my little bow here and, you know, check the string on it or something? Or is that like a little bit of cheating?"

Jim facepalms at the question about cheating. "You're going to get us kicked out, 'Billy'."

Teirist quietly shakes the departing wizard down for any loot he held for the party. He then flirts with the Minion as he is wont to do. "Thanks for the package, now I got something for you, if you want to meet me at the inn, I can show you a good time."

Teirist then opens the sack and pulls out the goggles. He tries them on, realizing quickly he can't see much past arm length he flips the lenses out of the way so he can see the monkeys. He then pulls his short swords and nods to the newcomers.

"Nothing wrong with cheating, the Lich cheats all the time, so we just cheat right back. Now, let's stop monkeying around. Wait. The hottie minion said there were two." He looks around.

Watching the famed wizard depart, Ballar remarks, Ya know forra minute, Ah thought tha elf was all-ergact'ta peanuts. Ballar wipes his brow in relief.

The red haired dwarf raises an eyebrow to Billy's flirtatious advances on the hottie and whispers to Teirist, I think tha new guy's muscl'n in on ya girl ladd.

Teirist's math throws Ballar for a loop. He looks around, counting on his fingers, One, two...Oi! Does tha cat count as an elf orra monkey?!

REMINDER: Jim's MAGE ARMOR was cast Day 6, turn 68 (approximate time of day, 11:10 am) so he's got 20 min left | SA casts SPIRITUAL WEAPON in the form of a smaller Dorn-Dergar/ Round 1 of 4/ Att. BAB plus Wisdom / 1d8 force damage per hit, + 1 point per three caster levels | MA prepares Dorn-Dergar |

Teirist shrugs then says, "Hey you said Bob's you name? Billy? Anyway, leave the minion, she's got a big crush on me, I've played hard to get rid of and she's about to get what she's wished for. Anyway, we lost a wizard Ballar, don't we get one back? Way it's worked in the past. Like for you, lost the super pretty cleric, got you and nachos. Lost the warrior, got Jim. Or was Jim just an extra...no matter..Anyway, goggles! Teirist moves the lenses around here and there.

"Wait. I was a sub-in? I thought you were the sub-in."

"Never you mind that Jim. Them elves never do understand these social interactions appropriately. In the end, we'll be the heroes. 'Cause us humans always come through and save the day!"

"And get the girls, too."

"Uh, did I just say that out loud?"

He shakes his head and looks over to the elf. "How come you don't have a robe on? I thought robes are standard elf attire. And are you telling me we don't have a wizard with us? No team is complete without a wizard!"

Glancing over and making sure the monkeys are still hanging around, he turns back to the stairs and mumbles. "No wizard. Sheesh. And where is that cat of mine. Doesn't she know if we let these monkeys get away, she's out of luck for the meal?"

"I don't wear robes because I am a butcher. Robes are very hard to clean blood out of. Besides, not elves are stuck up jerks...just most." Teirist says as he winks.

He turns to Jim. "I was, in fact, a sub for some halfling the group had prior to me, but, I've been here longer than all the rest of you, so respect your elders...or something."

Teirist flips the lenses up and down and then sighs. "That cat of yours always this late? Perhaps she got lost in the mail? Did you come parcel post?" he asks Billy.

As some of you look around expectantly for Fluffy, you notice a dark skinned elf with white hair standing motionless against a wall. He avoids eye contact at first, a slight smirk upon his face. The area immediately around his person is abnormally darker than his surroundings. After a moment you hear him whisper to himself, Now the big reveal. With a deep breath, a slight gesture and a grandiose flourish, he steps forward, the shadows following him like a blanket.

Music plays from nowhere in particular as he stands tall and proclaims, I am here! Keryth Tarathiel at your service! Are these monkeys bothering you?

Hunching over and in a hushed tone, he adds conspiratorily, his hand blocking the monkey's view of his mouth, Sorry I'm late! I just got the call a few minutes ago. So excited that all the time I have been putting in as Berenwyr's understudy is finally going to pay off!

Standing ramrod straight again, and with a wink to his newfound companions, he turns to address the simians massed in the hallway, Prepare to meet thy doom foul villains!

Upon hearing the new wizard not only knew Berry but studied under him, Tierist breathes out a single word, "F#)$%ck!"

"Some folks have all the luck."

Ballar smirks, Is therr-a r'turn address on tha package?
Pulling down his mask he mutters, Prestidigitacion. Smoke and a small flashing light manifest at the bottom of the stairs, Per'aps tha new wizard's wait'n ta big entrance? Ballar begins humming an upbeat dwarven rock anthem... Na,Na,Naa, Na, Na,nana!

Darned slow refresh rate... :(

A large cat comes down the stairs slowly looking all around, then she removes her sun glasses, places them in her purse and holds up a sign that says

I got lost, so what?

the map is updated, can we get the initiative of the new characters, and the next post will start the battle

initiative: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

-Posted with Wayfinder

"'Bout time you got here Fluffy. Look. Monkeys! I think it's feeding time!" Billy gestures over toTeirist. "That elf over there said he's a butcher too! May be he'll slice one or two of them up for you."

Initiative: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (16) + 5 = 21

Upon hearing the new wizard not only knew Berry but studied under him, Tierist breathes out a single word, "F#)$%ck!"

Keryth gives Teirest an odd look, before shaking his head and correcting his obviously confused friend. No. Not a "flock". A group of monkeys is commonly referred to as a "tribe" or a "troop".

"Heh. Learn something new everyday." Billy peers down the hall, and then looks up and down the supposed new resident wizardy elf. "I don't know...you sure you want to go up there and send THAT...", pointing in the general direction of the BIG monkey, "big boy to his doom? He might swat you. Elves don't handle getting swatted too well, I hear."

This might be an awkward time to ask, but did that robe clinging elf that ran upstairs take those dancing lights with him? Are we in the dark after the Minion leaves?

Oh, yes, it is dark, so dark even the regular Monkeys cannot see.

As the Lights go out in the passageway, you hear the voice of the Dungeon Minion,

You silly boys make me laugh and feel all tingly inside. If I get a break, maybe I'll come back and watch you play

And then you hear the ringing of the bike bell fade away into the distance