GM Advocate's Hell's Vengeance (Inactive)

Game Master Sir Longears

I vowed then that I would find him and get my daughter back. Heaven and the Glorious Reclamation have taken everything from me. My powers are gone, taken the moment I used them against one of my own kind but I don’t care. I will find them, I will fight them and I will destroy them. This is Cheliax, home of Hell on Golarion and if I have to sell my soul to do it I will destroy them and I will find my daughter!”

Ahreni closed the diary quickly, so that her tears didn’t smudge the charcoal. “But first,” she murmured quietly, looking out of the wagon at the approaching town. “First I bury my husband. Then I take revenge.”

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SPECIAL ABILITIES
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Bonus Feat: Humans select one extra feat at 1st level.

Skilled: Humans gain an additional skill rank at first level and one additional rank whenever they gain a level.

Weapon and Armor Proficiency
Dune drifters are proficient with all simple and martial weapons, the whip, and with all firearms. They are proficient with all light armor. This replaces the cavalier's normal weapon and armor proficiencies.

Challenge (Ex)
Once per day, a cavalier can challenge a foe to combat. As a swift action, the cavalier chooses one target within sight to challenge. The cavalier's melee attacks deal extra damage whenever the attacks are made against the target of his challenge. This extra damage is equal to the cavalier's level. The cavalier can use this ability once per day at 1st level, plus one additional time per day for every three levels beyond 1st, to a maximum of seven times per day at 19th level. Challenging a foe requires much of the cavalier's concentration. The cavalier takes a –2 penalty to his Armor Class, except against attacks made by the target of his challenge. The challenge remains in effect until the target is dead or unconscious or until the combat ends. Each cavalier's challenge also includes another effect which is listed in the section describing the cavalier's order.

Mount (Ex)
A cavalier gains the service of a loyal and trusty steed to carry him into battle. This mount functions as a druid's animal companion, using the cavalier's level as his effective druid level. The creature must be one that he is capable of riding and is suitable as a mount. A Medium cavalier can select a camel or a horse. A Small cavalier can select a pony or wolf, but can also select a boar or a dog if he is at least 4th level. The GM might approve other animals as suitable mounts. A cavalier does not take an armor check penalty on Ride checks while riding his mount. The mount is always considered combat trained and begins play with Light Armor Proficiency as a bonus feat. A cavalier's mount does not gain the share spells special ability. A cavalier's bond with his mount is strong, with the pair learning to anticipate each other's moods and moves. Should a cavalier's mount die, the cavalier may find another mount to serve him after 1 week of mourning. This new mount does not gain the link, evasion, devotion, or improved evasion special abilities until the next time the cavalier gains a level.

Have Gun
At 1st level, the dune drifter gains Amateur Gunslinger and Gunsmithing as bonus feats. The dune drifter uses his Charisma modifier (minimum 1) in place of his Wisdom modifier when determining his maximum grit points and for any other abilities which use grit. Additionally, he also gains a battered gun identical to the one gained by the gunslinger.
This ability replaces tactician.

Order of the Lion
Edicts: The cavalier must protect the life and lands of his sovereign at all costs. He must obey the commands of his sovereign without question. He must strive to expand the power and prestige of his realm.

Challenge: Whenever an order of the lion cavalier issues a challenge, he receives a +1 dodge bonus to his AC against attacks made by the target of his challenge. This bonus increases by +1 for every four levels the cavalier possesses.

Skills: An order of the lion cavalier adds Knowledge (local) (Int) and Knowledge (nobility) (Int) to his list of class skills. An order of the lion cavalier can make Knowledge (nobility) skill checks untrained. If he has ranks in the skill, he receives a bonus on the check equal to 1/2 his cavalier level (minimum +1) as long as the check involves his sovereign.

Grit (Ex)
A gunslinger makes her mark upon the world with daring deeds. Some gunslingers claim they belong to a mystical way of the gun, but it’s more likely that the volatile nature of firearms simply prunes the unlucky and careless from their ranks. Whatever the reason, all gunslingers have grit. In game terms, grit is a fluctuating measure of a gunslinger’s ability to perform amazing actions in combat. At the start of each day, a gunslinger gains a number of grit points equal to her Wisdom modifier (minimum 1). Her grit goes up or down throughout the day, but usually cannot go higher than her Wisdom modifier (minimum 1), though some feats and magic items may affect this maximum. A gunslinger spends grit to accomplish deeds (see below), and regains grit in the following ways.
Critical Hit with a Firearm: Each time the gunslinger confirms a critical hit with a firearm attack while in the heat of combat, she regains 1 grit point. Confirming a critical hit on a helpless or unaware creature or on a creature that has fewer Hit Dice than half the gunslinger’s character level does not restore grit.
Killing Blow with a Firearm: When the gunslinger reduces a creature to 0 or fewer hit points with a firearm attack while in the heat of combat, she regains 1 grit point. Destroying an unattended object, reducing a helpless or unaware creature to 0 or fewer hit points, or reducing a creature that has fewer Hit Dice than half the gunslinger’s character level to 0 or fewer hit points does not restore any grit.

Amateur Gunslinger
Benefit: You gain a small amount of grit and the ability to perform a single 1st-level deed from the gunslinger deed class feature.
At the start of the day, you gain 1 grit point, though throughout the day you can gain grit points up to a maximum of your Wisdom modifier (minimum 1).
You can regain grit using the rules for the gunslinger’s grit class feature. You can spend this grit to perform the 1st-level deed you chose upon taking this feat, and any other deed you have gained through feats or magic items.

Quick Clear (Ex): At 1st level, as a standard action, the gunslinger can remove the broken condition from a single firearm she is currently wielding, as long as that condition was gained by a firearm misfire. The gunslinger must have at least 1 grit point to perform this deed. Alternatively, if the gunslinger spends 1 grit point to perform this deed, she can perform quick clear as a move-equivalent action instead of a standard action.

Gunsmithing
Benefit: If you have access to a gunsmith's kit, you can create and restore firearms, craft bullets, and mix black powder for all types of firearms. You do not need to make a Craft check to create firearms and ammunition or to restore firearms.
Crafting Firearms: You can craft any early firearm for a cost in raw materials equal to half the price of the firearm. At your GM’s discretion, you can craft advanced firearms for a cost in raw materials equal to half the price of the firearm. Crafting a firearm in this way takes 1 day of work for every 1,000 gp of the firearm’s price (minimum 1 day).
Crafting Ammunition: You can craft bullets, pellets, and black powder for a cost in raw materials equal to 10% of the price. If you have at least 1 rank in Craft (alchemy), you can craft alchemical cartridges for a cost in raw materials equal to half the price of the cartridge. At your GM’s discretion, you can craft metal cartridges for a cost in raw materials equal to half the cost of the cartridge. Crafting bullets, black powder, or cartridges takes 1 day of work for every 1,000 gp of ammunition (minimum 1 day).
Restoring a Broken Firearm: Each day, with an hour’s worth of work, you can use this feat to repair a single firearm with the broken condition. You can take time during a rest period to restore a broken firearm with this feat.

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MOUNT
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Str 16, Dex 13, Con 15, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 6; Special Qualities low-light vision, scent.

HP 16 (2d8+4 Con+3 Toughness)
BAB +1
AC 15 (10 + 1 Dex + 4 Natural Armor)
Fort +5 Ref +4 Will +1

Size Large; Speed 50 ft.

Feats: Light armor proficiency, Toughness

Attacks bite (1d4), 2 hooves* (1d6)
*Secondary attack

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GEAR/POSSESSIONS
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Carrying Capacity
Light 0-33 lb. Medium 34-66 lb. Heavy 67-100 lb.
Current Load Carried - 31lbs
Money 15 GP 0 SP 0 CP
Pistol - 4lbs
Gunsmith’s kit - 2lbs
Chain Shirt - 25lbs
Military Saddle

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SPECIAL ABILITIES
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Weapon and Armor Proficiency
Monks are proficient with the club, crossbow (light or heavy), dagger, handaxe, javelin, kama, nunchaku, quarterstaff, sai, short sword, shortspear, shuriken, siangham, sling, spear, and any weapon with the monk special weapon quality.
Monks are not proficient with any armor or shields.
When wearing armor, using a shield, or carrying a medium or heavy load, a monk loses his AC bonus, as well as his fast movement and flurry of blows abilities.

AC Bonus
When unarmored and unencumbered, the monk adds his Wisdom bonus (if any) to his AC and CMD. In addition, a monk gains a +1 bonus to AC and CMD at 4th level. This bonus increases by 1 for every four monk levels thereafter, up to a maximum of +5 at 20th level.

These bonuses to AC apply even against touch attacks or when the monk is flat-footed. He loses these bonuses when he is immobilized or helpless, when he wears any armor, when he carries a shield, or when he carries a medium or heavy load.

Bonus Feat

At 1st level, 2nd level, and every 4 levels thereafter, a monk can select a bonus feat. These feats must be taken from the following list: Catch Off-Guard, Combat Reflexes, Deflect Arrows, Dodge, Improved Grapple, Scorpion Style, and Throw Anything.

At 6th level, the following feats are added to the list: Gorgon's Fist, Improved Bull Rush, Improved Disarm, Improved Feint, Improved Trip, and Mobility.

At 10th level, the following feats are added to the list: Improved Critical, Medusa's Wrath, Snatch Arrows, and Spring Attack. A monk need not have any of the prerequisites normally required for these feats to select them.

Flurry of Blows

At 1st level, a monk can make a flurry of blows as a full-attack action. When making a flurry of blows, the monk can make one additional attack at his highest base attack bonus. This additional attack stacks with the bonus attacks from haste and other similar effects. When using this ability, the monk can make these attacks with any combination of his unarmed strikes and weapons that have the monk special weapon quality. He takes no penalty for using multiple weapons when making a flurry of blows, but he does not gain any additional attacks beyond what's already granted by the flurry for doing so. (He can still gain additional attacks from a high base attack bonus, from this ability, and from haste and similar effects).

At 11th level, a monk can make an additional attack at his highest base attack bonus whenever he makes a flurry of blows. This stacks with the first attack from this ability and additional attacks from haste and similar effects.

Stunning Fist

At 1st level, the monk gains Stunning Fist as a bonus feat, even if he does not meet the prerequisites.

Unarmed Strike
At 1st level, a monk gains Improved Unarmed Strike as a bonus feat. A monk's attacks can be with fists, elbows, knees, and feet. This means that a monk can make unarmed strikes with his hands full. There is no such thing as an off-hand attack for a monk striking unarmed. A monk can apply his full Strength bonus on damage rolls for all his unarmed strikes. A monk's unarmed strikes deal lethal damage, although he can choose to deal nonlethal damage with no penalty on his attack roll. He can make this choice while grappling as well.

A monk's unarmed strike is treated as both a manufactured weapon and a natural weapon for the purpose of spells and effects that enhance or improve either manufactured weapons or natural weapons.

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GEAR/POSSESSIONS
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Carrying Capacity
Light 0-58 lb. Medium 59-116 lb. Heavy 117-175 lb.
Current Load Carried -
Money 35 GP 0 SP 0 CP

Concept:
-Lawful Neutral at first.
-Absolute loyalty - Dartanian's loyalty is unshakeable and it is this loyalty that will lead him to the dark side.
-He does not believe himself evil - Dartanian does evil things because he thinks they are right and just, he is a student of mixed interests and has created a life code based on loyalty, sacrifice and 'the greater good'.
-His parents blessed him with good looks, he has the face of a hero, and so he can get away with things others may not.
-His worship of Asmodean is personal and perhaps not all to deep, his true loyalty is to Thrune and Cheliax.

Goals:
-One of Dartanian's only 'rebellions' in life is that he does want to find out about his father.
-Dartanian would love to one day be a personal warrior for Abrogail herself.
-I personally would like to explore his 'fall' to Lawful Evil and see where it leads. I could see either him becoming darkness impersonified, or going the other way and leaving the party. (Some GMs might not like this possibility as it may cause conflict with the players, but I am perfectly okay with my character being killed by the party if he ends up their enemy through developement. I just want him to be the character shaped by his actions and the actions of those around him).

Secrets:
-Dartanian does not speak of his 'lack of faith' in Asmodean.
-Dartanian does not know that his father was a Taldoran Paladin or that Anastasia is his mother.

Relations:
-His mother Anastasia is one of the closest people to him. He is devoted to her and she is to him.
-His childhood friend Porthos who he greatly enjoys to debate with, they often do so in secret as they will take sides that would not be popular with the Sisters.
-One of the Sisters of the orphanage: Nadine. She has always found something about the relationship between Dartanian and Anastasia as strange and has done her best to sabotage it.

Quirks and Mannerisms:
-He strokes his chin and paces while thinking. (Or just when he is stressed)
-He is overly tidy and easily bothered by messes.
-Is always early to any meeting.

Anarxos took great pleasure in studying History under Calixarr's guidance, and came to realize the common saying was true - "Knowledge is Power". He grew up with this in mind, his thoughts focused on the achievement of great reknown and power. For this, he knew he had to make himself a necessity for the right people. He perfected his skills in writing, eventually catching the attention of representatives of the Thrune government. Thus, he was selected to work at the Ministry of Historical Accuracy, a part of the nation's authorities aiming to establish the One and Only Truth - the vision of the Thrunes, their perception of Chelish History. Rising quickly in the ranks of that organization, he was also trained, then entrusted with the interrogation of those who hold heretic beliefs in the eyes of the Thrunes. His emotionlessness and sense of observation became assets for the young man. His career was well on its way!

It was then he was sent to Longacre to spot and excise the veterans who'd claim themselves as members of the Glorious Reclamation. A welcome assignement indeed, for his most zealous rival at the Ministry was about to unleash her wrath. As he arrived in Longacre, he received dire news. His brother, now a Hellknight in the ranks of the Order of the Godclaw, was missing since the attack of the Iomedaeans upon Citadel Dinyar... This was now a personal affair.

Goals
- Anarxos's most prominent project and goal is to author a book in the field, to write History as it is happening. Maybe the rise of the Glorious Reclamation will prove to be the opportunity he's looking for.
- His goal is to prove his worth to his masters, so that they eventually allow his house (a minor noble house) to eventually rise as a major house. He may not think about it consciously just yet, though.

Secrets
- Anarxos likes other to think he hates people. To think otherwise would prove a weakness, a soft spot that his enemies and rivals could use against him. There is one exception he's hiding, though: his former mentor, Calixarr Oberigo. See the tied people section below.

- The Historian isn't aware of it yet, but his sexuality may be very different from what he expects. For many years, Anarxos has had numerous intercourse with girls, although all of them were based on him asserting his power over his concubine. Yet for all of his experiences, he has never experienced love. However, Anarxos's relationship with his mentor - based on a mix of power held over him, a passion for History going beyond words, and the fact that Calixarr has always been the one to initiate Anarxos to things that really mattered for the young man - everything points to a possible "awakening" to a homosexual relationship with his mentor. In some respects that relationship already exists on a platonic level, but the blooming (or discovery by an ill-intended third party) of that relationship could bring great shame to Anarxos in one way or another. Feel free to tell me if you aren't comfortable with this, and we can either play it down, or change it to another secret.

Three people tied to Anarxos
- The first and most important person in Anaroxos's life by far is Calixarr Oberigo. Also a member of a noble house of Chelish aristocracy, the teacher - who's twenty-five years older than Anarxos - has always managed to mix benevolent authority and the ability to awaken passion in the young man's heart. The mentor gave lessons to Anarxos since the latter was five, and managed to draw the attention of the young man towards History, knowledge, and the art of observation. He taught Anarxos to read, write, and ultimately rewrite History in a fashion that would please House Thrune. Anarxos quickly excelled in that craft, and caught the attention of members of the Ministry of Historical Accuracy in Egorian. Thus, the young man - now twenty-two years of age - left his manor house to pen his future with a deft hand. That being said, he hasn't forgotten his mentor, but he shields himself from thinking too much about him, preferring to devote himself to his work.

- The second person of note is Anarxos's elder brother Aricas Voralius. The relationship between the two brothers has always been difficult when they were young, as they were constantly pushed against one another by their father in hope to hone their combativity and character. From that confrontation, a feeling of mutual respect came to be. Aricas eventually became a Hellknight of the Order of the Godclaw. After three years as an Armiger, Anaraxos's brother became a full-fledged Hellknight not long before the Glorious Reclamation attacked Citadel Dinyar to retrieve Heart's Edge. Anarxos doesn't know yet if his brother is dead or alive, but one powerful feeling swelled in the young man: Aricas has failed House Voralius, he has shamed us. Now it is up to me to show what we're capable of. I was always the better one. thought the Historian.

- The third person that had a meaningful role in Anarxos's life so far is Catylinia Maledetta, who also works at the Ministry of Historical Accuracy and is Anaraxos's arch-rival. Many historians have come to envy the young man's quick rise in the ranks of the ministry's hierarchy, but none can match Catylinia's mettle and desire to see Anarxos brought down and humiliated. The two were lovers for a time, though both of them envisioned the relationship as a power play to sway the other and make him an obedient ally. Needless to say, both failed and the breakup was messy. When I mean messy, I mean blood on the walls and merciless deathmatch-messy. But with a sense of civilization, of course - we are in Cheliax, after all. Anarxos tried to frame Catylinia as an Arodenite, attempting to see her removed from office for illegal possession of dangerous literary material that could endanger the legitimacy of one of Cheliax's major noble houses. The plan failed since the "proof" that were planted proved inconclusive, an observation that Anarxos took as a personal slight since he had spent so many nights working on it. Catylinia's move is yet to be seen, but it's bound to be bloody.

Three mannerisms
- Anarxos revels in excitement as he beholds his "prey" - the person he's interrogating or confronting - squirm before him.

- He strokes his beard when he's about to discover something new.

- He delights himself in asserting his superiority by being overly pedantic, and resorting to unnecessarily verbose sentences.

Defense
AC 15, touch 12, flat-footed 13 (+3 armor, +2 Dex)
hp 10 (1d8+2)
Fort +1, Ref +4, Will +2

Offense
Speed 30 ft.
Melee rapier -1 (1d6-1/18-20)

Investigator Extracts Prepared (CL 1st; concentration +4)
. . 1st—comprehend languages, shield

Formula Book, level 1
Comprehend Languages
Heightened Awareness
Longarm
Monkey Fish
Shield

Statistics
Str 9, Dex 14, Con 12, Int 17, Wis 10, Cha 12
Base Atk +0; CMB -1; CMD 11

Feats Fast Learner[ARG], Skill Focus (Knowledge [history])

Traits bruising intellect, chelish noble

Adventuring Skills
Bluff +1 (+2 vs. members of Chelish aristocracy)
Craft (alchemy) +7 (+8 to create alchemical items)
Diplomacy +5 (+6 vs. members of Chelish aristocracy)
Disable Device +4 (no tools yet)
Disguise +1 (+2 vs. members of Chelish aristocracy)
Intimidate +7
Knowledge (local) +7
Knowledge (planes) +7
Perception +4
Sense Motive +4
Spellcraft +7
Use Magic Device +5 (+6 vs. members of Chelish aristocracy)

Background Skills
Knowledge (history) +10
Knowledge (nobility) +8
Linguistics +7

Languages Celestial, Common, Draconic, Halfling, Infernal

SQ alchemy (alchemy crafting +1), inspiration (3/day), trapfinding +1

Other Gear studded leather, rapier, alchemy crafting kit, backpack, bedroll, belt pouch, earplugs, flint and steel, ink, inkpen, journal, mess kit, noble's outfit, pot, scroll case, signet ring, soap, waterskin, 20 gp, 15 sp, 7 cp

Special Abilities
Alchemy +1 (Su) +1 to Craft (Alchemy) to create alchemical items, can Id potions by touch.
Inspiration (+1d6, 3/day) (Ex) Use 1 point, +1d6 to trained skill or ability check. Use 2 points, to add to attack or save.
Trapfinding +1 Gain a bonus to find or disable traps, including magical ones.

A quick note about Anarxos - since I've long studied history, one of the kind of evils that immediately came to my mind was a revisionnist. What fouler crime is there to warp the collective memory of a civilization to serve the interests of an elite ruling class? Thus was Anarxos born.

Please let me know what you think! Any feedback is very welcome, and nothing is set in stone.

Now, a couple questions regarding her background:
-Where were you born? In which town/village/city and in which kingdom? I assume it was in the north (Irrisen or Land of the Linnorm Kings), since Winter Hags are inhabitants of cold forests, probably the Hoarwood Forest (Irrisen) or Grungir Forest (Land of the Linnorm Kings). If so, add Skald to your languages.

-Normally a hag gives some leeway to the daughter for her to join her or not, which makes things easier for the changeling to avoid the mother since she is really powerful. In Ahti's background, her mother went after her, so she must be special. There is not much information about changelings but I think it is safe to assume that the hag has some way to find her daughter, so how you managed to flee from her from the north all the way towards Cheliax? Did you get some help? What is keeping your mother to take you? Perhaps her bauble? Perhaps the Hellknights helped her?

-Regarding the Hellknights, there are no hellknight in Longacre... if there were there wound be no need for the PCs in this adventure. The nearest order is the Order of the Scourge in Citadel Demain, near Cheliax, almost 200 miles from Longacre. If you were coming from the north you could have crossed paths with the Order of the Nail in Varisia. Regarding the 'security in Longacre', it could not be a result from the Hellknights, since they are too far away. What is your business with the Hellknights?

-About her bauble, how she got it and why she kept it? Her father gave her, or perhaps a fey since it is tied to one of the Eldest? What this bauble means to you?

-Your tied NPCs seems too random to me. What I asked for was someone with a meaningful relation to Ahti, not two guys who merely know her in the past two weeks only thanks to commercial transactions. Perhaps someone from your travels or a Hellknight?

-From what I read, I could not find anything that really makes her evil... she looks more like TN. Is she really evil? If so, why?

Now a couple observations and questions about your background:
-Does your mother, a hedgemage from Senara, simply agreed when an orc from the mountains asked her 'hey want to have a baby?', or she was kidnapped/raped? After your birth, she escaped or your father released her?

-From what I see/read, a magus is a learn based class, much like a wizard, so it makes little sense to me that he accidentaly burnt a bully... his magic is not tied to his blood or he'd be a sorcerer or a bloodrager. Perhaps he learnt magic from a shaman?

-Regarding him going to Longacre, there are two problems... first, there is no Asmodean Church in Longacre and second, why would the clergy teach him about arcane magic? Also, why Longacre ~300 miles away and not Senara (which almost 3x the size of Longacre) that is ~100 miles away from the mountains? If he wanted to learn about magic, Senara was the best option both in lore/knowledge and in social acceptance.

-As I said, Longacre is a small town around 1600 inhabitants, so there isn't realy guards patrolling the streets nor Hellknights anywhere nearby, so this training in a asmodean church needs to have been held elsewhere... and if it is the case, why did you ended up in Longacre? Also, if you are the only hope of the tribe and your father is waiting for you, why did you not return to him now that the training is over?

-You picked a ganasa as your weapon but it is not a common weapon neither for the orcs nor for the chelaxians... Where did it come from?

-Destro is LE but he comes from an orc tribe, which are mostly Chaotic. Why he became lawful? Is his whole tribe lawful or at least non-chaotic? If so, why? If he is LE and his tribe is Chaotic, what is his thoughts about it?

-How many years is Sarvin? A tiefling reaches adulthood at 60 so there is a pretty good chance that both the priest that incited the rabble against your father and the man how murdered your mother are dead (or around 90). If so, will you take revenge on the church (because both of them were devotes) or you intend to search for their sons and grandsons to seek revenge?

-This question is tied to the above... depending on your age, your biological father could also already be dead. Of course I could make him an aasimar/tiefling to extend their life span but in this case Sarvin would have to have proof that he is still alive to seek his vengeance.

-When you escaped, did you bring the halfling with you or he was left behind? How long have you been in Longacre?

-You mentioned that you were building a homestead in a remote location in Cheliax but then there were investigators, local government and your exile... so were you in the middle of nowhere or in a town/city? If so, which one?

-Since he was exiled and ancient tomes do not grow in trees, where you went to acquire your knowledge? Was it a big city or even an arcane academy (even if difficult since he is an exile)? The Mage of the Veil archetype is tied to Qadiran magic tradition... how you manage to learn of it so far away?

-There are three citizens in Longacre that could have the knowledge you mention but only two of them are 'available': Tealan Ruckleer and Nisra Wilmore.

-About your contacts, there are a couple more questions... My intention to do this is know about meaningful NPCs for Vigan. What does his sister represents to him? How are their relationship? Who is this contact inside the Thrune and why would he help an exile instead of just reporting you?

-If you are an exile, why would you seek the help of the Thrune, who are the proper law in Cheliax? Why would not they just turn you in? Also, there is another major point that is your goal relating to the shadow plane... there is nothing to connect it to the plot so when you get this book, why would you continue with the Thrune if you have grater goals?

-The academy you mention would be the Egorian Academy of the Magical Arts I guess... if so, are your sisters also wizards?

-You mention that your sister died and you wish to return her to life... Do you already have her corpse? If so, have you taken any care to avoid her decomposition? Where is she buried?

-What problems you have with the Pathfinders? You mention that you'd not be happy about knowing Olyssia joined them but why?

-This is tied to your family's business... what is the kind of business opportunity you are looking in Longacre? The town has little farming productivity and low consume of goods... perhaps something to do with lumber or herbs from the forest or even savage animal species?

-A minor quirk... there is no mayor in Longacre and the man how acts as a 'mayor' is Archbaron Fex. For story development reasons, this is not the man for you to have something against. There are also just a few shops in town so I think we'll need to change the last couple sentences in your background. Also, if you have the resources and a legitimate business, why would you risk yourself with Cimri?

-If you allow me to give an idea: How about you were sent to Longacre to actually build something, like a subsidiary and are finding little help from the townsfolk regarding workforce? You think that it would take a while for you to build it, your gold will not last forever, and you do not wish to go home and ask mom for more gold... also if you fall in the graces of the government it could help you to speed everything.

-Unfortunately there is no activity of the Bellflower network in Longacre, once more because it is too small. In the future adventures they will come in play but not now.

-You have a Nodashi... even if it is not an exotic weapon, it is pretty rare in Cheliax... how you managed to get it?

-About the whole Cult of Pazuzu I do not see a way to work with it... first there is no council in Longacre since it is run by Archbaron Fex and in the past was governed by a mayor and second there is no sense for a cult of Pazuzu (worshiped by winged creatures like harpies and tengu). There is an option though that could fit: Haagenti. How about your father was investigating some sort of drug/poison (that turned people into demonic creatures that only thought about destruction) and followed the trail until the fringes of Longacre, in the Wisperwood?

-About the Glorious Reclamation and your assignment, it will also not work simply because there would not be time for this... the first book happens before the Glorious Reclamation is considered a threat so you'll need another reason to go to Longacre... how about someone has some clues that you were the responsible for you captain's death and Atrius advised you to leave town just for precaution... not knowing where to go, you went to Longacre, a place you always wanted to go to learn more about your father's death.

-Cimri also has no idea about the Glorious Reclamation but your contact with her could be just that you are almost broke and need some coins to remain away from Ostenso.

-We have a problem with you being friend with Cimri. She is 17-18 years old and Longacre is too small there are not really a criminal crew there. She was not always a 'ne'er-do-well' so there is no chance for you to have seen her as a master criminal. How about you met her when you were a kid but you were really just kids and friends. Just like her you longed for the chance to leave the boring small town and one day you bought yourself a one way passage to Egorian in a merchant caravan. Once there, you were out of your luck and involved with the criminals and so on...?

-There is also an issue with Lord Barozzo and you being a Thrune Agent... this is indeed the objective of the AP but not in the beginning! How about you screwed up your last job and this Lord is not fond of failures... afraid of being killed by the other agents under his pay, you abandoned him and headed back to the only other way you once called home: Longacre.

-About your mount... where and how you got it? A camel is for sure not a native species from Cheliax. Also, why a camel? If the reason is just because it is the only other available mount, I'd like to let you know that I'd allow other kinds of mounts... just ask and I'll give you the statistics!

-There is also a huge problem with the reason she is in Longacre: There is no way for Tamard to have sent you and Sathursta after Kol for him to have helped with the fall of Longacre to Iomedae because it hasn't happened yet! The Chelish government and the Asmodean Church are yet unaware of the danger that the Glorious Reclamation could represent to Cheliax or Longacre... they just declared a martial law.

-There is an alternative if you allow me to give my opinion: Clariona is actually part of the Glorious Reclamation and during their many reconnaissance missions she recognized Kol. Since then, she 'left' the GR to take revenge on you by blackmailing him into reveling your location and than sending a letter to Tamard, tricking him to send you and Sathursta after Kol.

-The reason of why you are in Longacre aside, there is another important question: Why would you join Cimri? She has nothing to do with the GR and is just trying to score some gold for herself...

-So, just to be clear, are you still a slave? If so, who is your master? How long have you being a slave? If you are not seeking your freedom, why would your master let you run around?

-Slaves are quite valuable, especially halflings. The slave markets normally take place in the big cities, which Longacre is not so an hypothetic caravan would stay 1-2 days at the most unless there is some pretty good reason.

-How have you joined your faith in Groetus? You never wished to escape or you adopted this 'give up' cult after numerous unsuccessful attempts?

-Why would you have interest in helping Cheliax or the house of Thrune? How it would benefit you or further your goals?

-There is no Bellflower agent or operation in Longacre also.

-Why your parents remained in Cheliax and not simply moved to somewhere nicer? Why were your parents killed (it is not against the law to worship Iomedae... Longacre has no Asmodeus temple but has an Iomedaean one).

-I have no problems with you being sent to Longacre to root out heretics but bear in mind that your superior has no idea about the Glorious Reclamation so far... this mission would be a simple 'inquisitor business' and quite random...

-Also, is there a special reason of why your brother have chosen the Order of the God Claw, since there are at least 3 other orders close to Westcrown?

-Just to let you know, I'm completely ok with the homossexual part.

-With your advanced age, it means she had already worked for the whole Fex family... and your rivalry with both Cimri and Yukas are actually comical... a 147 half-elf trying to best a 17 girl or trying to best a man that is already on his 80-90 (probably senile).

-Also, as an unrelated matter to your background, if accepted I need you to take a read on a couple guides about the proper way to post in a PBP game... it looks like you are used to past a lot of emoticons and I really do not like it (it breaks the atmosphere of the game IMO).

-Your background is around the fictious hamlet of Stoneford and how it was attacked by the Glorious Reclamation. The problem is that the GR is still on the beginning during the first book so this attack is limited to the region nearby Citadel Dinyar (in Isger). It is fairly easy to assume that Stoneford was in that region and quite plausible that the Asmodean rule there was weak since it is a pretty desolate region.

-The next problem is how you managed to reach Longacre since Stoneford would be ~300 miles away. There is a river nearby that will, eventually, reach the Whisper River, about 40 miles from Longacre. During her last fight, Ahreni could have been adrift atop a plank until she reached Longacre where Cimri rescued her... this could make Ahreni think she must repay Cimri somehow, giving a perfect hook for the adventure but also means two things: Ahreni wasn't able to bury Damien and she thinks Anya is dead. This would not mean that she doesn't want to avenge them, especially when she learns that Braxus has her daughter!

-In an unrelated matter, can we change the Braxus name to Graxus? It is an important member in the GR in the future...

I don't personally own any resources giving much detail about Cheliax beyond the player's guides for this and Hell's Rebels. I noticed that Egorian was the capital and that it was reasonably close to Longacre (2 cities away, at least, without consulting a scale for distance). I figured if there were a city appropriate to have such a place, Egorian had to be it. I think you've confirmed my suspicion. :) Can you tell me anything more about the Order of the Scourge and Citadel Demain? (or point me to a good online resource? I'll google it too, to see what I can find) If you'd like me to incorporate any additional details, I'd be happy to. As I mentioned in my submission, I wanted to keep some of the elements a little loose in case they could be either adventure hooks or could be replaced for connections to the party that you ultimately select.

As for the camel, I did select it because it wasn't a horse. I recognize that it's not native (and hope I highlighted that in my background by referencing the stares it drew as she rode into town). I do like the spit attack, and think that could be useful and will be fun to roleplay for a level or two. That said, I would love to explore different mounts. How far afield would you permit me to go? (Animals, magical beasts, outsiders?) It would be very cool and thematic if the mount could be something LE, but that may be better as something to build to; the beast rider does get to swap out mounts at every level, so the decision at level 1 is in no way binding.

I have an idea for where she got the camel, but I'll wait to commit anything to paper until I know that's what the mount will be. I'm going to start doing some reading, both on the Cheliax topics and the mount; I'm sure I'll be back with more thoughts before long. If you have answers or other suggestions in the meantime, I'll keep checking back. Thanks!

2.Trevor is a 'trustee' He is lent out to lend his skills and hasn't made an escape attempt and so is considered a 'Good Slip'(Sort of ironic since Halflings are popular due to only taking up half the resources one would think that they are cheap.)

3.Trevor was born into slavery and any vague notions of escape faded into nilhism. 'Nod. Get Treat.' Gets him through the day and he gaze upon the moon and had a mystical awakening. He believes only Pharesma and Groteus are the only deities of worth.One to usher people in and then out, and one to shut off the lights when closing time comes.

4.Thrune/Cheliax is currently a prime spot for him to practice his faith/methods. He isn't that interested in Thrune and believes that given time, it will eventually go the way of other empires and just be and entry in an old book that will crumble to dust.. So 'helping' them is at most delaying the inevitable.

-Where you lived? Which war are you talking about? If you are talking about the Chelish Civil War, it happened and ended 75 years ago... is Penance that old?

Starting ages for gnome inquisitors is between 49-94 years old so yes, he is that old. He was born shortly after the war started. The family hid out in Brastlewark where they had hoped to blend in.

-Why your parents remained in Cheliax and not simply moved to somewhere nicer? Why were your parents killed (it is not against the law to worship Iomedae... Longacre has no Asmodeus temple but has an Iomedaean one).

Besha, his mother, was crippled in an engineering accident, as were many other bystanders when a recently constructed tower collapsed in on itself. She became paralyzed from the waist down which made traveling difficult. Her magic was not strong enough to heal her condition. They were killed when it was discovered that they were hiding old copies of the officially published history books detailing the pre-rewritten actual histories of Cheliax and Thrune.

-I have no problems with you being sent to Longacre to root out heretics but bear in mind that your superior has no idea about the Glorious Reclamation so far... this mission would be a simple 'inquisitor business' and quite random...

That's fine. I envisioned his assignment to Longacre as more of a 'find out what the newer military veterans who opposed Thrune are up to' kind of blind mission.

I am in the process of editing his background to include all of this.

As for the mount, something that looks like it could be interesting, and perhaps a little less strange, is a moose. Looking over the stats, it would likely be pretty balanced. There would probably need to be a little stat-massaging done to bring it in line with the horse/camel power level, but not much. It would certainly be native, though still out-of-place as a mount (something that I do feel is important if I'm taking the beast rider archetype). I could see Pava balancing the lance in the moose's rack as it charges into battle, head down. That wouldn't suck. :) Most of the other animal choices are explicitly made available by RAW at level 4 or 7, so I don't think they make sense now, as that would be early access. If you want to suggest a magical beast or outsider, I'll listen, but both seem like they'd be overpowered, and I like your focus on "reasonable power" with the 15 point-buy, etc.

My thought on the camel, should we choose to keep that, is that Pava (probably with Octana and/or Ruve) went to a circus when it was stopping in Egorian. It ended up being horribly bad entertainment. Most of the animals were poorly trained, and there was a mishap with some acrobats that caused a sudden "nothing to see here" kind of scene. But at the end of that boring day, there was a camel act. It also didn't go well, but Pava found some unintended comedy when the camel vomited bile on its trainer in protest of the act. Pava was enchanted, and had to have the beast; she wouldn't leave the circus until Ramael was hers. Btw, just so you know, I intend that all of Pava's mounts will be named Ramael, but each will have a different epithet. This camel is "the spitter," a turtle might be "the snapper," a lion "the golden-maned," etc.

Anyway, it is what it is. and obviously the story does not work as written.

Would it be Ok to have some 'weak tielflings traits', (cosmetic only) and rework stats for Sarvin as a human?

The above would make his story work and he could also be the subject of tiefling discrimination without even being a tiefling.

If the above is not Ok, I cold make Sarvin be from a community of aasimar or have aasimar involved in the story.

Thoughts?

Just with the beast rider archetype you'd be limited by animals only. I'd allow, in addition to the camel, a riding version of an aurochs, an elk, or a wolf. In the future, if you are willing to burn a feat taking leadership, you'd be able to select a more powerful mount in place of a cohort, opening a couple magical beasts and outsiders.

EDIT: You were faster... yeah, a moose could work, similarly to an elk.

Well I guess the slave caravan doesn't really work and it seems that halflings just don't work as PCs do to the nature of the game so I will withdraw.

• Alexander's Birthplace and Family residence: I thought of Westcrown, but Remesiana sounds good. The business is mostly a lumber company, but always looking to expand. The family is also interested in shipping business with supplying lumber for shipwrights and shipping of lumber.

  With heading to Longacre, Alexander would have been sent to see about getting a Lumber Yard and a Lumber Mill started.

• Yes, Alexander went to Egorian Academy. His older and younger sister are both wizards as well. The youngest sister is a Sorcerer. All the sisters joined the Pathfinder Society. As I said before, Alexander doesn't even know that Olyssia, the youngest sister even joined the Society.

• The elder sister's corpse is in the family crypt. Possibly cast restore corpse with permanency. Though if not, once he knows how, Alexander would cast restore corpse upon it. Since that would bring the body back to when it just died. Doesn't say anything about the soul though.

• He doesn't like the Society because his elder sister was killed shortly after she joined. His younger sister joined soon after to find out why she didn't return and sent the body of Reilly back afterwards. So all sisters joined the society. And one of them died because of it.

• As I have written earlier, went to Longacre to see about trying to get either a lumberyard or a lumber mill going for the family business. So maybe if not the Arch Barron, it could be a local land owner or something that has a decent sized forest on his land. I can see him going to a bar, and talking with Cimri. Might think that helping her might be interesting, and depending on what it might be, might help with business opportunities.

• And I agree entirely about everything you suggested. Sounds like a good plan. Yes, definitely agree with everything you said. Would not want to bother his mother when he was sent out to specifically to do this. And yes, he does believe if he becomes an agent of the Government, thinks that will improve his family's standing, and business. And again, I agree wholeheartedly with what you said.

In the months it took to return him from the front, Marcellus's condition had improved incrementally - enough that he could stagger around with a cane, just barely. In his anguish he sought the comfort of religion, beginning to attend services at the church of Iomedae. Sermons on the nature of sacrifice and heroism mollified his bitterness at being cast out from the Chelish Navy, and he began to accept his lot in life.

It was at the church where he met Isabella, and struck up a friendship with her. A beautiful young woman, Isabella's husband was deployed along the contested Andoran border. The Thrunes maintained that these soldiers were to defend against "Andoran aggression," but it was well known such soldiers were engaged in shady incursions into Andoran territory for the purpose of forcibly "repatriating" what Cheliax saw as treasonous Chelish citizens from within Andoran's borders. It was one one of these raids gone wrong that Isabella's husband lost his life. Devastated, Isabella turned to Marcellus for comfort, and the two quickly fell in love. They were married a year after Isabella's first husband's death.

The five years that followed were the happiest in Marcellus's life. For the first time since leaving the military, he was content with his role in life, and had plans to start a family with Isabella and have children of his own. Years of trying did not deter him at first, but eventually this dream began to fade as nothing worked. The realization that his family name would die with him began to gnaw at Marcellus, and began the downward spiral into despair that would grip him for years to come.

By now, Marcellus's injury had healed greatly. He still possessed little of his youthful flexibility, and stabbing pains shot through his body from time to time, but he could walk without assistance and no longer felt like a burden to those around him. He had become possessed of a nervous energy, needing to burn it off with rigorous exercise and physical training. It had been more than a decade since he had needed them, but he began to oil and clean his armor and weapons from his old military days, using them to drill and train once more to distract himself from his growing despair that his legacy would never amount to anything.

In 4707, a traveling evangelist of Iomedae named Ivanos Perevel stopped in Longacre. The townsfolk had never seen a cleric of the Inheritor capable of such blessings in diabolic Cheliax, and membership in the local church surged as a result of his short stay. While he was there, Perevel performed several 'miracles' for the town, using his divine magic to heal two men of blindness and one woman of a wasting sickness in her legs. Amazed, Marcellus pushed forward to be healed himself, dreaming of at last sleeping through the night without pain or sprinting again without doubling over in spasms. The healing powers of the goddess washed over him, erasing his pain... but for only a moment. With a terrible surge of agony, the spasms returned, causing Marcellus to cry out. Perevel examined the man's wound and explained that the injury was beyond his power to heal. The arrowhead, so long embedded in the base of his neck, had fused with the bones of his spine, impossible to remove. Marcellus was dumbfounded with shock. He had dared to hope his condition could be cured, and had those dreams crushed. In his fury he smashed a statuette of the goddess, rushing from the temple. He would never again return as a member of the church.

Isabella did not lose faith, continuing to pray to the goddess for guidance and strength for her devastated husband. Marcellus could not reconcile the powerlessness of Iomedae with his wife's refusal to abandon her beliefs, growing ever more angry at the woman for what he saw as a betrayal. He withdrew from her further, spending nearly a year drinking himself into a bitter fury each night, eventually growing violent. After one too many fistfights turned into incidents worthy of the Sheriff's attention, Marcellus, not entirely by choice, purged himself of his habit for drink and threw himself fanatically into his physical training once again. It has been more than five years since Marcellus has had a drop of alcohol.

In recent months, Marcellus has begun to suspect his wife has begun an affair with a man named Evren Crosberg, a musician much younger and handsomer than Marcellus, who is a devout follower of Iomedae and a close friend of his wife's for years. He has no proof, but in his mind the man's guilt is almost assured.

Today, Marcellus is a aimless man with tremendous passion but nowhere to direct it. Offered an opportunity to accomplish greater things by Cimri, he will at last have found a purpose once again, and a second chance to reclaim glory for himself.

Step 2: List at least 2 goals for the character.
Character Goal: Marcellus wants to be given the respect he feels he deserves, and to accomplish something significant under his own power before he dies. His thoughts turn to his eventual death every morning when he awakens and feels the ravages of age begin to prey upon him, and his struggle to "achieve more" will never truly be over. He would be sorely tempted by the prospect of bargaining his soul for restored youth, particularly eternal youth.
Player Goal: I want Marcellus to be consumed by his insecurities. He understands strength and power, not subtlety and peace. Throughout the course of this game, he will destroy his marriage, cause irreparable harm to the liberty and happiness of his nation, and ruin the lives of many - but he will achieve his goals even if it means the destruction of everything else around him.

Step 3: List at least 2 secrets about your character. One is a secret the character knows, one is a secret that involves him but that he is not actually aware of yet.
Marcellus Knows: Marcellus's fears are his greatest secret. While he projects an outward appearance of brutality, resiliency, and stoicism, he suffers from numerous insecurities and often feels that all of his goals have eternally been out of his reach.
Marcellus Doesn't Know: His wife is pregnant with his unborn son, a fact which will shock him to his core. After years of trying to produce a child, Marcellus believes himself to be infertile, as his wife had a child from a previous marriage who died in infancy. If he discovers her pregnancy, his first thought will be that she carries another man's child.

Step 4: Describe at least 3 people that are tied to the character.
Friendly: Marcellus's wife, Isabella Vossler. Born Isabella Flynn, Marcellus married the widowed but young and beautiful woman shortly after retiring from his time at sea in the Chelish navy. She still manages to love her husband, but worries that his newfound paranoia and jealousy are changing him for the worse. His suspicions that she may be unfaithful to him are unfounded, but he is driving her away by becoming more and more controlling and possessive. She has grown closer to her Iomedean faith as a result, which only fuels his anger.
Friendly: Zachariah Mechler was Marcellus's shipmate onboard the Stygian Lash warship in the Battle of Westcrown Harbor, and fellow resident of Longacre. Perhaps each others' only true friends, the two are close companions and confidants, respecting one another for the bond they shared in battle. Mechler is satisfied with his new lot in life, however, while Marcellus is not.
Hostile: Erven Crosberg, a musician and devout preacher of Iomedae's teachings, is the man responsible for re-igniting Marcellus's wife Isabella's passion for her faith in the Inheritor. Marcellus blames Erven for his wife growing more distant from him, and even suspects that she is having an affair with the man (which is false). He can prove nothing, but he has made no secret of his hatred for the man.

Step 5: Describe at least 3 mannerisms, or quirks that your character has.
1. Marcellus has a wild-eyed and crazed stare when in battle, gripping his wickedly-barbed heavy flail with knuckles turning white from the strain. He shrugs off injuries with a stone-faced stoicism, seeming to his opponents to be immune to pain. He treats every skirmish, no matter how small, as a deadly affair worthy of the utmost seriousness.
2. He talks down to people he doesn't respect, especially young people. In youth, he sees everything he wishes he could possess again - health, vigor, and potential. Secretly, he is envious of them.
3. In combat he has a tendency to bark orders, and expect them to be obeyed. He is not the most clever tactician, but he is confident that strong leadership is better than a wishy-washy leader taking the time to think things out when a single sword blow could end a life.

-Irrisen, near the Hoarwood.

-Normally a hag gives some leeway to the daughter for her to join her or not, which makes things easier for the changeling to avoid the mother since she is really powerful. In Ahti's background, her mother went after her, so she must be special. There is not much information about changelings but I think it is safe to assume that the hag has some way to find her daughter, so how you managed to flee from her from the north all the way towards Cheliax? Did you get some help? What is keeping your mother to take you? Perhaps her bauble? Perhaps the Hellknights helped her?

-From what I can tell, Changelings seek out the Hag. Mostly it's just been luck and decent Disguise uses. More in a PM I'll sent shortly. It's very likely she had Hellknight help though.

-I had thought she'd work with them. Not as an official member, of course, but more of a on-call mercenary. For some reason I hadn't realized there were no Hellknights around.

-The bauble was just a bit of a flavor piece. Like a holy symbol for the Eldest.

-I admit I have trouble creating contacts and allies for characters. It's not my strong suit, but with her travels it probably wasn't going to be easy anyway.

-Bitterness and a slow-stewing desire for revenge.

2) I actually completely forgot to talk about the relationship between House Voralius and religion. It is known to all that the Thirce-Damned House Thrune decided to make Egorian the capital city of Cheliax after the end of the civil war, forsaking Westcrown and its "old guard" nobility. One of the reasons is that several of these houses weren't too keen to worship Asmodeus at first, though they understood the necessity to bow to the Thrune. Such an hestiation proved unhealthy for House Voralius, who traditionally worshipped Abadar, patron of urban civilization and trade. In the aftermath of the war, the Voralius were deemed a "less worthy" house in the Thrunes' eyes, and became a minor house. Since then, they've struggled between their customary worship of different patrons - accepted in the order of the Godclaw - and saving their public face towards the Thrunes, paying their respects to Asmodeus as well. Old habits die hard, and the customary worship has persisted until today. Seeing the Order of the Godclaw as a way to reconcile their beliefs with the Asmodean Cheliax, Athis Voralius pulled some strings so that his eldest son Aricas could enter the order and pave the family's way to religious reconciliation with the Thrunes.

As for Anarxos, he has always seen religion as a mere tool, and refused to indulge in the family tradition. Instead, he has realized that worshipping Asmodeus - a god much closer to his won beliefs anyway - could prove very beneficial for his own career. Hence he decided to publicly renounce Abadar and embrace the Asmodean faith. This has also contributed to weaken his relationship with his father and his brother. When word of the Godclaw's failure to defend Citadel Dinyar spread, the resentment towards his brother become all the more intense.

To be honest I only noticed their extended life span when I built one last year! I'm completely fine with making him a human. If you are interested, you could take and refluff the Foul Brand (face) drawback, having instead of a brand some tiefling features and then take a trait that gives you some 'tiefling-like' ability.

I think that's a great idea!

I'll rework the PC this weekend with the changes you suggested.

-What about changing Erven Crosberg's name to Riley Kels? It will be far more rewarding!

For him, the added benefit would be to gain allies within the town to eventually help him track down his quarry. Since this is his first mission on the field, he'll make sure to put every chance of success on his side.

As far as the Bellflower network goes I'll drop that portion. Is it still reasonable to assume that they would use the town or surrounding area to support their efforts (My thought is a town of malcontents would be more likely to look the other way). If so I'll maintain the slave hunter angle and just remove the Bellflower specifics.

On a related note I'm currently just working off the information in the Cheliax book and players guide for the AP. In your opinion would it be worth looking a the town description in the AP itself? I have access to it but generally avoid cracking them open until after I've played/DM'ed them to avoid spoilers.

It was my character who introduced her mistress to the handsome son of the master of the stables. It also was her that encouraged them to start dating and to keep things secret. It was her that consoled the girl after the girl's mother forbade her to ever see the boy again after she found out, as my character intended. She then used this slight to widen the gap between mother and daughter, advising the girl that the best way to hurt her mother was slander their family reputation. It didn't take the girl long to earn the nickname 'Harlot of Corentyn'. When the girl finally realised she hadn't just ruined her family but most of all ruined herself she took her own life, after some encouragement from my character.
After that it was a simple thing to convince the mother to tear up the ownership papers for my character. She had done her thing, their daughter was dead and she had many scars from their daughters abuse. Besides, she knew all the details of what her daughter had done and how she did it and there was no need to further blemish her daughter's name. It all made sense to the mother at the time and by the time she came to my character was gone.

In fact she was reborn. For the first time she had a name, a real name and not 'doll', 'dolly' 'slip' or 'slave'. That name was Caela.

-Your background is around the fictious hamlet of Stoneford and how it was attacked by the Glorious Reclamation. The problem is that the GR is still on the beginning during the first book so this attack is limited to the region nearby Citadel Dinyar (in Isger). It is fairly easy to assume that Stoneford was in that region and quite plausible that the Asmodean rule there was weak since it is a pretty desolate region. Yeah, I figured that Stoneford was an early move by the GR. It being nearby would explain how the GR knew that Ahreni was there as well.

-The next problem is how you managed to reach Longacre since Stoneford would be ~300 miles away. There is a river nearby that will, eventually, reach the Whisper River, about 40 miles from Longacre. During her last fight, Ahreni could have been adrift atop a plank until she reached Longacre where Cimri rescued her... this could make Ahreni think she must repay Cimri somehow, giving a perfect hook for the adventure but also means two things: Ahreni wasn't able to bury Damien and she thinks Anya is dead. This would not mean that she doesn't want to avenge them, especially when she learns that Braxus has her daughter! Your ideas make sense to me. Cimri rescuing her makes life much easier and if Damien had relatives in Longacre, she can still tell them that he died, just not bury him - which keeps the original idea intact.
Thinking Anya is dead is great for me as a storyteller and extra bad for Ahreni! She will be hoping that Anya is alive (since she was was, last that Ahreni knows) but the suspense will be terrible - all the better for RP-ing with! :)

-In an unrelated matter, can we change the Braxus name to Graxus? It is an important member in the GR in the future... Sure :) If the rival is important then his fall will be that much sweeter! :D

Let me know if that all seems to fit.