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Technically, if your item looked like that, you never made it as far as the cull, since it contains a good number of causes for disqualification (exceeding word count and being a weapon instead of a wondrous item, to name a few).
But yeah - don't do that. Thanks for digging up the link, Eric.
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For all the new voters who weren't around in 2010, the item in this screenshot is Sean K. Reynolds's example of how not to design a wondrous item. (Actually, it's his demonstration of the submission tool preview button in action, but it's also a textbook example of how not to design a wondrous item.)
hey! i didn't give him permission to use that!!!!! :)
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I don't know, it's not that bad...
After all, it did kill Hitler.
;)
Hey, what the heck.. gets my vote.. pass it through!
*Can't wait to see the module!*
Goblins invaders attack England... Orc's attack Poland and by the Gods of many myths- the Moth Men attacked America!
I say give that sword to some assorted 70s pop star (Cough* Sir Elton John) and let's get the war won already!
The visual is killing me..
Ok back to 100 more votes..
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To be more explicit, here are lessons to learn from this:
1) Your entry should be a Wondrous Item. This item is not a wondrous item -- it's a weapon. This can get you DQ'd. I've seen several items that were daggers and such in the competition.
2) Your item should do something you cannot completely replicate with a spell, feat, or class feature. If your item replicates a spell, it needs to do so in an interesting or novel way that fits the item's theme. An item that does nothing but let the user cast fly once per day is boring.
3) Your entry should NOT be a unique item. Only major artifacts can be unique items. Wondrous Item descriptions are basically recipes for characters to build. You can't say your item is a legendary cape that Bob the Epic Fighter used when any 3rd level spellcaster can craft one.
4) You should devote very little to description. As my own personal rule, I spend no more than one sentence describing the item's appearance and background. Your item mechanics can speak for it if you design them well.
5) Your item should give typed bonuses. In nearly all cases, an item should never give untyped bonuses. See Magic Item Pricing in the CRB for typical bonus types. The most common bonus types for wondrous items are enhancement (for ability scores), competence (for skills), and resistance (for saves).
Obviously, there's way more than this, but these are five of the common traps I've seen -- and now see less often after the cull.
Gandalf wasn't an elf...
You're thinking of the non-elf Gandalf. This is Gandalf the elf. He's much cooler, because his sword was uber-badass, and he killed Hitler.
The Norse Gandalf is referred to as an Elf.
Didn't Gandalf the elf work for Santa?
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I don't know, it's not that bad...
After all, it did kill Hitler.
;)
Forilla. To be honest, Sean's sword made me want to totally abandon "legitimate" D&D/Pathfinder and play with that sword's designer as my only GM for all time. I think Sean secretly wants to play that kind of game from now on too. It's like how Blake accused Dante of getting so much more inspired when he was writing about Hell than Heaven.
I'm starting to concoct a desperate and deluded plot in my head that allows me to become a child again, only terminally ill, so that the Make a Wish foundation will ask me what I want and I will tell them that I want Sean Reynolds to run a Pathfinder campaign for me, except he has to do it entirely in the persona of the man who created Sean Reynold's Sword of Killing Hitler.
Crap.....
Well I guess that means that my "Phaser of Red Shirt Doom" didn't make the cut....crap.
Next year will be my year...I know it!
I'll start work now on the "Toupee of the Shatner"!
Hey, what the heck.. gets my vote.. pass it through!
*Can't wait to see the module!*
Definitely!! Are you freaking kidding me?? Straight to the top! Total backfire post on Sean's part. He accidentally wrote the coolest item of all time. Maybe his post was actually intended to prove that you can break every single rule and still make it to the top 32...
4) You should devote very little to description. As my own personal rule, I spend no more than one sentence describing the item's appearance and background. Your item mechanics can speak for it if you design them well.
This is also a sub-issue of your third item. If it is a recipe that any Xth level caster could make, you can bet some of them want it to look different. An analogy I've used elsewhere is that a particular magic item description should describe a car, not a specific make, model, and year.
But so did Hitler! The sword just killed Hitler even sooner than Hitler did. Which means the sword of killing Hitler is more Hitlery than Hitler!
There isn't enough LIKE in the world for this statement
Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9
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Hey, what the heck.. gets my vote.. pass it through!
*Can't wait to see the module!*
Goblins invaders attack England... Orc's attack Poland and by the Gods of many myths- the Moth Men attacked America!
Actually, many years ago a friend of mine introduced an alternative real world in some D&D tournaments for the rpga.
You didn't live through those settings but many times in his adventures there were mentions about the Germany of Aldorf Histler and his Elven supremacist party. Or the war the Americans fought in Deadnam.
Gandalf wasn't an elf...The Norse Gandalf is referred to as an Elf.Both correct. Tolkien borrowed a whole bunch of names from the Norse Eddas when he wrote "The Hobbit".
Later, after he wrote "The Lord of the Rings" and combined the "Hobbit" world with his "Silmarillion" mythology with all its meticulously invented languages and very detailed background, he came to regret that (at least in the case of the dwarves, maybe not specifically Gandalf) - there's some quote about a "rabble of Eddaic-named dwarves".
He stole from the best! Gandalf is an aspect of the Grey Man, The Wanderer, any many more names.
I love this thread.
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7
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So I can be clear though, the only thing that would get this item disqualified is the fact that it identifies itself as Sean Reynold's submission, correct? Not the missing Slot/Price header or the fact that it goes over 300 words?
If anybody else made a Sean Reynold's Sword of Hitler-Killing it would still be a valid submission, albeit one that hit many pitfalls, since that wouldn't identify their item?
Actually, word count >300 is a firm disqualifier.
And if it was just under 300, but missing necessary template info (like Slot or Price) that would put it over the word count, it would also be disqualified if someone caught it.
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There are many reasons why that item is a DQ. :p And many, many other reasons why it is an awful attempt. :p
I kind of liked the part where it already had the wielder on it performing an action they hadn't yet/have already/will perform. Time loops are funny.
At least he got Wonderous right. Err, wrong? You know what I mean :)
Actually, it really should be Wondermous...