Not everybody that plays Pathfinder uses the Golarion setting.
I will apologize for this one, assuming that thou meant me. It was not my intention to point to the entire Pathfinder system. I have a habit of thinking Golarion = Pathfinder, since I use Golarion a lot. At one point in the discussion, I did mention that I wasn't referring to the "main" rulebooks, but I guess that got lost.
I don't view it as discriminatory at all to not have homosexuality in my campaigns. Perhaps they do exist, but if they do, it is not the concern of the players and doesn't interest them. Pointing out the fact that the bards are gay is about as useful as pointing out that the bartender and the barmaid are flirting with each other. It is nothing more than a flavor element, and one that I personally find unnecessary.
Pathfinder is a rule system. If other GMs and players wish to include homosexuality, that's fine. I personally do not. That is how I "handle homosexuality in my campaigns." Disagree with me if you will, and if you do I will listen, but as Ms. Price said, "we're not going to change each other's minds."
I've not said the gagging bigot thing, but never mind. Again, read a little more closely.
My original post may have been unfortunate in it's choice of words, but it had the effect of people jumping down my throat because of that. Now i have nothing against discussion that is not one sided, but what this thread has been is people saying their opinions, ignoring what others say (myself included in both)...
I'm not ignoring your opinion; on the contrary, I'm trying to drag your opinion out of you. You guys are making generalizations, and then won't cite your sources. You keep playing the victim telling me that everyone is calling you a homophobe when no one is. No one is ganging up on your or jumping down your throat, people are disagreeing (as one is expected to in a discussion!)
I want to have a conversation with you about your side - you don't have to name-call yourself.
What in the f$*$ are you talking about?I don't even know how to respond to something so silly and absurd. I was unaware there were only two options at extreme ends and no middle ground. Apparently I can't support something to one degree or to another. I either am uber pro guns and shoot them in my yard like Yosemite Sam or I say guns in only certain circumstances (a moderate stance) which means I want to use the second amendment as toilet paper because I'm not all in so I don't support it at all.Like how in a few places homosexuals get partially executed. Yeah. Something like that.
Yeah...um, what? What's "partially executed", and what does it have to do with anything?
I'm not ignoring your opinion; on the contrary, I'm trying to drag your opinion out of you. You guys are making generalizations, and then won't cite your sources. You keep playing the victim telling me that everyone is calling you a homophobe when no one is. No one is ganging up on your or jumping down your throat, people are disagreeing (as one is expected to in a discussion!)
I want to have a conversation with you about your side - you don't have to name-call yourself.
Some of us who respectfully disagree with the other side may be wary of the political correctness issue. I was banned on another gaming website due to a post on a thread about this issue. None of us wish to be banned from the Paizo Community, yet feel for one reason or another, the desire to participate in this conversation.
Again, to use myself as an example, I do not "hate" homosexuals. But what I define as discrimination (denial of human or citizen rights) differs from other people's views of discrimination. Some people think that even speaking a dis-favorable opinion of certain homosexual causes is a hate crime.
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I've not said the gagging bigot thing, but never mind. Again, read a little more closely.
My original post may have been unfortunate in it's choice of words, but it had the effect of people jumping down my throat because of that. Now i have nothing against discussion that is not one sided, but what this thread has been is people saying their opinions, ignoring what others say (myself included in both)...
I'm not ignoring your opinion; on the contrary, I'm trying to drag your opinion out of you. You guys are making generalizations, and then won't cite your sources. You keep playing the victim telling me that everyone is calling you a homophobe when no one is. No one is ganging up on your or jumping down your throat, people are disagreeing (as one is expected to in a discussion!)
I want to have a conversation with you about your side - you don't have to name-call yourself.
Ok...i generally don't pay too much heed about sexual orientations, because I, personally don't care about them. As for inclusion in the game, I will include it, if it will in some way, improve the gaming experience, otherwise, NPCs in my games are for all intents and purposes genderless, because players won't bother too much with them beyond basic conversation. If a player takes an interest however, i will flesh out that NPC, and while doing the fleshing out will decide on the sexual orientation of said NPC. Usually i roll dice for that.
The most bothersome aspect of this thread to me is the sentiment that if you don't let a cause completely consume your life, you are a part of the problem.
The only person that was saying that was me, and my choice in words wasn't clear. I think that it was over-generalized, and I'm sorry it didn't make any sense.
I think that if you believe in a cause, you should be willing to defend it. I don't go out to protests, either, but I do speak up when I need to. What I do think, however, is that saying "I support this, but here is a statement to the contrary" is, well, contrary.
Even as someone who could care less about sexuality and supports equal rights, I'm glad to know that employees of the game are going around trying to interject their own fervent views of morality. How about the spectrum of being overly whiny and oversensitive vs. being crude and overcritical?
In the spirit of fairness how bout this? Since gnomes (and others) get a racist bonus for hatred vs. goblins..how about a race with a +2 vs. homosexuals? (no I'm obviously not being serious but making a point that it's just a game)
Just because you don't include gays in the game doesn't mean they don't exist. Homosexuality isn't at the center of medieval culture. If you don't specifically say anything about gays it would probably be assumed they exist in their normal proportion to the populace in either open or closeted relationships.
This post just came across, to me, with a tone-deaf dismissiveness that only makes things worse, and doesn't sound like someone who would actually be interested in equal rights.
But that's my opinion, and maybe the author wasn't clear in her/his meaning, either.
I'm not ignoring your opinion; on the contrary, I'm trying to drag your opinion out of you. You guys are making generalizations, and then won't cite your sources. You keep playing the victim telling me that everyone is calling you a homophobe when no one is. No one is ganging up on your or jumping down your throat, people are disagreeing (as one is expected to in a discussion!)
I want to have a conversation with you about your side - you don't have to name-call yourself.
Some of us who respectfully disagree with the other side may be wary of the political correctness issue. I was banned on another gaming website due to a post on a thread about this issue. None of us wish to be banned from the Paizo Community, yet feel for one reason or another, the desire to participate in this conversation.
Again, to use myself as an example, I do not "hate" homosexuals. But what I define as discrimination (denial of human or citizen rights) differs from other people's views of discrimination. Some people think that even speaking a dis-favorable opinion of certain homosexual causes is a hate crime.
Nobody is going to ban you here as long as you remain civil, as you have. Again, please stop being the victim; no one is accusing you of a hate crime, and saying stuff like that only proves to discredit you.
I was unaware there were only two options at extreme ends and no middle ground.
When you live in a place where one can be executed for homosexuality. When you live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND. You fight, or you conform. You cannot be partially executed. You either care that they get killed, or you don't. If you are doing nothing more than giving lip-service "equal protection" then youu really don't care.
The point I, at least, was making was that explicit sex is not the same as sexuality. If you have a married couple in your game, you have sexuality in your game, even if you only briefly mention that they're married.Unless you have no characters in any sort of romantic relationships, you aren't playing in a sexuality-neutral setting.
Saying "I don't have gay characters in my game because I don't have sex in my game" when you have characters that are called out as straight (that is, it's mentioned that they're married, or in love, or widowed, or whatever) is basically saying "straight=relationships, gay=sex" which is a) not true, and b) at best, unfairly heteronormative.
I think this bears repeating because it seems no one responded to this specifically, and it was one comment I think was actually driving the conversation forward by making a new point.
It's hard to think about specific NPCs when I tend to run adventures that only last a half a year (and as such create a lot of NPCs that show up and then disappear), but I'm definitely guilty of this from time to time. It's not my fault if I instinctively jump to hetero couples when I think of married or "together" NPCs because those are the type of romantic relationships I have, but that doesn't mean I could ignore it, especially if I claimed a "sex-free" game (which I don't).
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I was unaware there were only two options at extreme ends and no middle ground.When you live in a place where one can be executed for homosexuality. When you live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND. You fight, or you conform. You cannot be partially executed. You either care that they get killed, or you don't. If you are doing nothing more than giving lip-service "equal protection" then youu really don't care.
Sorry, i don't live in such a place. And i can't care about the entire world. Nor would i want to. I care about people close to me and about people in my immediate vicinity.
I feel bad for victims of hate crimes, but the only thing i can do to help them is to try and stop hate crimes around me, not everywhere.If you can't understand that, than it is you who has a problem, not me.
It's hard to know where to draw the line - how active should one be in fighting against stereotypes and/or being inclusive?
I've had have a smattering of gay characters over the years, yet this thread makes me slightly embarassed to realise that the only black characters are tribal native types from the Mwangi expanse (or similar, in other worlds).
Should I be worried about that? Should I include polynesians? The fact is, I make all my fantasy world caricatures of reality - the villains are ultra-bad Mr Burns types, and the good guys are saintly and pure incarnations of Ned Flanders. It doesnt surprise me that my subconscious inclination is for race to be a very localised phenomenon - since it provides a pretty convenient narrative shortcut (amongst my similarly culturally sheltered group of friends).
When you live in a place where one can be executed for homosexuality. When you live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND. You fight, or you conform. You cannot be partially executed. You either care that they get killed, or you don't. If you are doing nothing more than giving lip-service "equal protection" then youu really don't care.
In most of Europe and in the US of A, all homosexuals are treated with the same respect as other human beings. There are no more real anti-sodomy laws, with Lawrence v. Texas (2003) ending the last one that I am aware of. They can vote, purchase goods, be in pretty much any organization, freely practice their lifestyle, etc. The only places where they are not "allowed" are groups like the Boy Scouts, which retains the privilege due to Freedom of Association. You are not really persecuted here.
As for places like the Middle East where homosexuals are killed, my answer is...join the club! There are bombings of Christian and Jewish churches all the time over there. Pretty much everyone is persecuted there. So...we're really both in the same boat in countries like that. Only in places of freedom and Constitutionally Federated Republics can we openly discuss our differences.
I was unaware there were only two options at extreme ends and no middle ground.When you live in a place where one can be executed for homosexuality. When you live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND. You fight, or you conform. You cannot be partially executed. You either care that they get killed, or you don't. If you are doing nothing more than giving lip-service "equal protection" then youu really don't care.Sorry, i don't live in such a place. And i can't care about the entire world. Nor would i want to. I care about people close to me and about people in my immediate vicinity.
I feel bad for victims of hate crimes, but the only thing i can do to help them is to try and stop hate crimes around me, not everywhere.
If you can't understand that, than it is you who has a problem, not me.
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Pathfinder is a set of rules created to facilitate gameplay. How you utilize said rules is up to you. Thousands of people play RPGs, from satanists to Christians. Wildly different games, using the same ruleset. If you would like to have sexuality in general enter your campaign as more than an aside, that is your decision. Leave your views out of my campaign.
You don't care about an absence of sexuality. In fact, an absence of sexuality would be weird. You just want an absence of homosexuality. And that's because...
I oppose discrimination of any kind, but I do have certain religious beliefs that come into conflict with certain lifestyle beliefs.
"I oppose discrimination of any kind, but I'll be damned if I tolerate homosexual relationships being represented with the same level of respect and attention as heterosexual relationships receive."
Laughable.
People don't purchase Pathfinder to see the designer's views on social issues.
People don't purchase a fantasy literature product to see the designer's views on social issues?
Are you serious?
But anyway, this is a topic that cannot be freely discussed. It is impossible to have one of these threads without mods wildly deleting posts for content that they disagree with, or don't think is pertinent.
You're just bitter that your intolerant views weren't tolerated.
In any event, such a discussion is beyond the scope of this thread, and would undoubtedly be construed as "hateful," even though I mean no hate towards anyone.
You're the sort of person who says things like, "No offense, but you're a terrible person," huh?
I think that throwing "...bricks, flares, Molotov cocktails and bottles..." makes Belgrade a place where people "...live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard".
Ok...i generally don't pay too much heed about sexual orientations, because I, personally don't care about them. As for inclusion in the game, I will include it, if it will in some way, improve the gaming experience, otherwise, NPCs in my games are for all intents and purposes genderless, because players won't bother too much with them beyond basic conversation. If a player takes an interest however, i will flesh out that NPC, and while doing the fleshing out will decide on the sexual orientation of said NPC. Usually i roll dice for that.
I'm not trying to single you out, Hama, but to instead offer a point for consideration. If a group's game already includes mentions of an innkeeper and wife, or the king and queen and their children, or the PC's own family, then it already includes sexuality. Hetero players often don't think about it anymore than breathing because the hetero narrative is innate to their existence as hetero social creatures. But when the game materials and participants keep including these plot hooks and background flavor, and they are all heterosexual-centric, then it stands out like a sore thumb to most of us LGBT/QUILTBAG folks.
I don't believe anyone is suggesting an LGBT-inclusiveness mandate in what you play in your home games. I'm certain that nobody here is suggesting you roleplay out any form of sexual act. I'm just suggesting if your game already mentions hetero relationship dynamics, ask yourself why and maybe mix it up occasionally.
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in the US of A, all homosexuals are treated with the same respect as other human beings.
This is false. Not just a little false. Super false. It would be hilariously false, but unfortunately there's very little humor to find in the sort of discrimination we're talking about.
So is that something you actually believe? Or is it just something you say on the internet to make you feel better about your apathy? I'm just wondering what compels someone to type something like, "Gay people are respected just as much as everyone else in the United States."
Confession time!
I run a number of...well, there's no way around it, I run a number of very highly-sexual games.
One is centered around a fantasy settlement-turning-metropolis that the Kingmaker rules would have been really handy to have in its inception, focusing on a city of drow inspired by the Ellistraean offshoot-cults and who have as their figurehead leader a bard who is the diplomancer and nookie-oracle, to coin a phrase. It's shameless, fanservicey, and yet chock full of drama more resulting from politics with neighboring nations than swordplay and spellflinging.
One is a collect-them-all monster hunt. It is sexual because the players' patron is creating himself a harem of monstrosity + obsceneness that would make Lammashtu gmile. None of the 'action' happens 'on-screen', but the players all know about it.
One is effectively Not Freaking Harry Potter: the 3.x/Pathfinder campaign of a 2e spellfilch who eventually was reincarnated as a dragon (don't ask) and ended up the guardian of an artifact and self-proclaimed master of the magical arts, with a focus on capturing certain spots in the world where magic coalesced and condensed into liquid form, in essence mana ley line nodes. Sexuality is implied in focus characters purely on account of relationships and offspring, but the focus is more on atracting students to his main lair/tower home and collecting insanely lucrative tuition and study fees...and convincing would-be retiring dwoemercrafters to take up the teaching profession. Also, there's crossover with the first game due to shared world.
There's people of every shape, sort, variety, orientation, and taste in my games...in theory.
Mostly, however, unless it is relevant to the situation at hand or a plot I'm working with, the field is set to a question mark rather than a specific function, mostly out of apathy and/or lack of desire to focus on it unless it, again, is central and relevant. There's plenty of couples of all varieties and some solo individuals raising children or being close or what have you, but if it's not in focus, it's ambiguous enough to appease without being the focus.
Of course, I also am inclined to pander, when suitably bribed, and that applies to things that aren't even my personal taste, within some measure of reason, so I've written plenty of scenarios and discussed plenty of intimate occasions that left me personally cold, but did happy things for players.
I had a point somewhere along this discussion, and lost it, so I think it's pretty much a 'orientation is undefined until observed and a fornicative noun is given'.
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Yep...last year the gay parade was cancelled, because it was deemed too big a security risk. Because my country is full of self-righteous bigoted idiots who believe that there is something wrong with being gay.
I vehemently oppose those people. Unfortunately, they are the vast majority.
What i don't understand is what you think i can do except donate to LGBT organizations to further their cause, tell off people who oppress LGBT people and defend them when i can.
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Again, having negative things in the setting does not make the setting a racist or homophobic setting. There's racism and homophobia in America that doesn't mean America is racist and homophobic.
Compared to a lot of places, it is.
And the fact you may live in backwoods Mississippi and think you'll get killed for being gay (unlikely in todays America..more likely driven out or beaten up)
Oh, just driven out of town or assaulted? Is that all?
I don't have to devote my life to YOUR cause to support it. And the fact I disagree about how central gayness should be in a game is completely irrelevant to what I'd do if someone was about to be lynched.
Do you believe that homosexuality deserves to be treated in a way similar to heterosexuality in games? Because that's what we see in Pathfinder. Nothing more, nothing less.
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People don't purchase Pathfinder to see the designer's views on social issues.People don't purchase a fantasy literature product to see the designer's views on social issues?
Are you serious?
With the exception of the novel line, Pathfinder is not literature. It's a game system, and associated support products (supplements and adventures).
Yep...last year the gay parade was cancelled, because it was deemed too big a security risk. Because my country is full of self-righteous bigoted idiots who believe that there is something wrong with being gay.
I vehemently oppose those people. Unfortunately, they are the vast majority.
What i don't understand is what you think i can do except donate to LGBT organizations to further their cause, tell off people who oppress LGBT people and defend them when i can.
When you live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND.Sorry, i don't live in such a place.
Confession time!
I run a number of...well, there's no way around it, I run a number of very highly-sexual games.
A sexventure, perhaps?
I feel like we aren't talking about gaming anymore...
When you live in a place where one can be executed for homosexuality. When you live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND. You fight, or you conform. You cannot be partially executed. You either care that they get killed, or you don't. If you are doing nothing more than giving lip-service "equal protection" then youu really don't care.In most of Europe and in the US of A, all homosexuals are treated with the same respect as other human beings...
Except that they can't get married in most of the states, which excludes them from a variety of legal benefits.
"I oppose discrimination of any kind, but I'll be damned if I tolerate homosexual relationships being represented with the same level of respect and attention as heterosexual relationships receive."
None of my players are homosexual. All of them are Christian. All of them are good people who oppose discrimination based upon sexual orientation(one of them is on a school board opposing such things), but none of them believe that homosexual marriage should be condoned. All of us think that marriage is more than just pleasure, we see it as a bond between a man and a woman, instituted as a sacrament by God. So while we oppose violence, hate, or denial of equal human rights, we are not proponents of gay marriage.
Are you serious?
Please explain sir, I do not quite understand what you mean by this. My apologies.
You're just bitter that your intolerant views weren't tolerated.You're the sort of person who says things like, "No offense, but you're a terrible person," huh?
Go read what happened in Serbia. Go see what happens in certain Middle Eastern countries. That is intolerance. As for your second line, it is loaded with irony. But again, I mean no hate, nor do I want to be rude or disrespectful, I simply have a differing opinion. Unlike in Serbia, I peacefully disagree, and prefer to discuss our differences openly and without rancor.
Go read what happened in Serbia. Go see what happens in certain Middle Eastern countries. That is intolerance. As for your second line, it is loaded with irony. But again, I mean no hate, nor do I want to be rude or disrespectful, I simply have a differing opinion. Unlike in Serbia, I peacefully disagree, and prefer to discuss our differences openly and without rancor.
Go read about what happens to us every day in the "good ol' US of A. It's no better. The only rancor you receive is when your opinion stops being your opinion and falls into the realm of unresearched falseness.
With the exception of the novel line, Pathfinder is not literature.
Ignoring, for the moment, the fact that the novels are part of what makes up Pathfinder as a whole, the only way you could be correct about that is by using a really narrow definition of the word "literature". A pointlessly narrow definition, I would argue.
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I think that throwing "...bricks, flares, Molotov cocktails and bottles..." makes Belgrade a place where people "...live in constant fear that you are going to be attacked or killed for not conforming to societies gender standard".
I live in Belgrade and know a lot of gay people. There are a few gay bars, and i went to one once with a few gay friends. There was no band of people charging in there throwing molotovs and bricks at people. You can't form an opinion about a country or a city from a single article. AFAIK, there has been no attacks on the gays here for a long time (if you don't take attacks from public figures on TV as attacks, and those i don't take seriously, because everyone knows those people are nutcases).
Truth is that Serbia is largely against homosexuality, mostly because it does not know better. But, given time, it will become more tolerant.
None of my players are homosexual. All of them are Christian. All of them are good people who oppose discrimination based upon sexual orientation(one of them is on a school board opposing such things), but none of them believe that homosexual marriage should be condoned. All of us think that marriage is more than just pleasure, we see it as a bond between a man and a woman, instituted as a sacrament by God. So while we oppose violence, hate, or denial of equal human rights, we are not proponents of gay marriage.
I would very much like to have a calm conversation with you about why I think this belief is problematic (from my viewpoint as both an American and as a student of scripture) but I don't think this is the place for it.
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Except we have quite a few post here that strongly imply that if someone's campaign doesn't feature homosexual relationships at least occasionally, then they must be a gagging homophobic bigot.I don't see that; please cite your sources.
Well, see everything Scott Betts has to say during this thread, both the things he's already posted and undoubtedly the things he will post here in the near future.
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This is running hilariously off topic, so I'm going to pack up before the thread gets closed. I've said my opinion, and I thank those who disagreed with me for sharing their's. I rather enjoyed the conversation, and I truly appreciate the lack of mudslinging (seriously, I was afraid this would get bad).
If anyone is interested in continuing this conversation in a thread in the Off-Topic forum, I'd be glad to join there, but until then, we aren't talking about the original thread any longer.
Thank you all!
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None of my players are homosexual. All of them are Christian. All of them are good people who oppose discrimination based upon sexual orientation(one of them is on a school board opposing such things), but none of them believe that homosexual marriage should be condoned.
Then they don't oppose discrimination based upon sexual orientation.
This is tantamount to saying, "All of them are Christian. All of them are good people who oppose discrimination based upon skin color (one of them is on a school board opposing such things), but none of them believe that inter-racial marriage should be condoned."
The only difference is that we're talking about sexual orientation instead of skin color. You and your friends have deluded yourselves into believing that you are proponents of equal rights, but the reality is that your closely-held religious beliefs prohibit you from being actual proponents of equal rights.
Please explain sir, I do not quite understand what you mean by this. My apologies.
Just as with science fiction, fantasy literature is not only about creating a fantastical world, but using the backdrop of that fantasy world as a way to explore modern social issues by examining it from the perspective from a society different or removed from our own. Examination of social issues is rampant in nearly all forms of fiction.
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What i don't understand is what you think i can do except donate to LGBT organizations to further their cause,
What you can do is the simplest thing, and that is to not treat lgbt people and their relationships as if they don't exist, because when you do you reinforce the idea, however passively, that they are abhorrent.
Well, see everything Scott Betts has to say during this thread, both the things he's already posted and undoubtedly the things he will post here in the near future.Except we have quite a few post here that strongly imply that if someone's campaign doesn't feature homosexual relationships at least occasionally, then they must be a gagging homophobic bigot.I don't see that; please cite your sources.
It's unfortunate that you see it that way, Kthulhu.
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With the exception of the novel line, Pathfinder is not literature.Ignoring, for the moment, the fact that the novels are part of what makes up Pathfinder as a whole, the only way you could be correct about that is by using a really narrow definition of the word "literature". A pointlessly narrow definition, I would argue.
Except we aren't in a Campaign Setting forum. And most people have taken to calling the campaign setting Golarion. Pathfinder is the rule system.
People don't buy rule systems to see the designer's views on social issues.
Well, except for FATAL. :P
Except we aren't in a Campaign Setting forum. And most people have taken to calling the campaign setting Golarion. Pathfinder is the rule system.
People don't buy rule systems to see the designer's views on social issues.
I agree.
So where, exactly, in the rule system has Paizo discussed homosexuality?
Or heterosexuality, for that matter?
Or is it maybe possible that when people are saying, "Keep homosexuality out of Pathfinder," they mean more than just the rule system?
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None of my players are homosexual. All of them are Christian. All of them are good people who oppose discrimination based upon sexual orientation(one of them is on a school board opposing such things), but none of them believe that homosexual marriage should be condoned. All of us think that marriage is more than just pleasure, we see it as a bond between a man and a woman, instituted as a sacrament by God. So while we oppose violence, hate, or denial of equal human rights, we are not proponents of gay marriage.
Yes, but you do understand that many Christian denominations (and non-Christian religions) are fine with same-sex relationships, especially monogamous ones that lead to marriage. Heck, most Roman Catholics in the United States support same-sex marriage and equality even when their church hierarchy does not.
"Good Christians" doesn't universally mean opposition to same-sex marriage and LGBT equality.
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I took the comments as more in the interests of self-improvement (being Gamer Life and all that). Perhaps it's worth considering what "there's no sexuality in my games" means if you do have heterosexual couples - I think that's the point. Maybe by perpetuating those relationships as 'normal' (to the point of being ubiquitous) you are inadvertently affecting friends of yours at the table in ways you havent considered.
That's how I took it anyhow. I dont really think anyone actually cares how I run my game beyond my players.