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I'm a guild leader and interviewer sitting behind a large desk covered in numerous applications, letters, and notes.
You are the enterprising adventurer and interviewee who has come to sign up for the grand quest through the dangerous land in the hopes of obtaining the glorious treasure.
How might you go about explaining your character's mechanical strengths and weaknesses to me, in game, without bringing down the fourth wall?
Please post your in-game response in your post, then post the metagame information in a spoiler, like so:
Good afternoon sir. I am Daren Mott, also known as "the Northern Giant," martial artist and traveling sage. I am as swift as a crane, and as ferocious as a dragon. Like the dragon, I exemplify physical prowess, supernatural cunning, and potent magical ability. I am a master of the quarterstaff and am quite competent in a myriad of other weapons, common and exotic alike. You would not regret hiring me for this venture, as I can serve you and your team as a capable scout, accomplished spellcaster, or fearsome skirmisher. I am equally comfortable in the open field, dark dungeon, or alien demesnes.
I'm hoping this thread will allow people to become more comfortable describing abstract game mechanics in a manner that makes sense within the context of the campaign world. In short, a thought exercise.
alright RD I was going to post like me for a second but instead I will be your huckleberry
*opens the door without knocking and sits down, putting his booted feet up on your desk*
"Now, 'fore you git yer bloomers in a bunch, jus' take a look in yer top drawer, there. If y' kin figger out what I took, well, then I'll jus' give it on back."
*looks over toward the closed window*
"Might wanna check yer locks. Oh, an' that trap a' yers is gonna have ta be reset."
*looks back, tipping up the brim of his hat with one finger*
"Git a new guard downstairs, too. That fella ain't 'xactly th' mos' 'bservant-like, if y' follow me. Heh, he sure di'nt."
*smiles*
"Now, when y' figger out which one a yer papers I jus' stole and why yer sittin' on one a' mah knives, then y' kin tell me that I jus' got yer lil'...'mployment 'pertunity."
Skree'chak the Goblin ranger/alchemist enters silently and waits patiently. He picks his nose idly and ponders when you'll realize that the pouches of alchemical glue he hid in your seat cushion broke open when you sat down some time back, and whether the bag of brewed reek and marker dye he rigged to fall on the first person who opened the supply closet should have been connected to a small explosive charge instead.
He notes the window and fingers the thunderstone/flashbomb party favor he has palmed. His dire bat, Batty Bat (no relation to AM BARBARIAN'S cohort) will aid in his escape should he need to make a hasty exit - all he need do is whistle. Then he switches from picking his nose to digging earwax out of his right ear as he grins at you like an idiot.
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An immaculately dressed tiefling with a sickly complexion opens the door, removes his hat, and bows slightly before taking a seat.
"Ah, good afternoon, sir. Your guild comes highly recommended, and I trust you've found that I am as well. I believe you've seen my resume, but I brought an extra copy; just in case."
The diminutive man removes from his satchel a bundle more like a tome than a folio, its cover prominently emblazoned with a Glyph of the Open Road.
"This contains brief reviews of my exploits and transcripts of my published Pathfinder Chronicles. From pages 212 through 317, you'll find testimonials of several of my traveling companions. I assure you that those are... particularly enlightening."
"As you've no doubt gathered from my reputation, my primary strength lies in amplifying the natural abilities of my cohorts. By offering them certain... performance enhancing admixtures, my beneficiaries may vanish from sight and strike down our enemies with little fear of retribution; or confront an army without fear of their blows. Indeed, some may even find that, when mortally wounded, Pharasma herself turns them away and entrusts them once more to my care."
"But don't let the deeds of my companions overshadow my own. Those who oppose me quickly find themselves awash in a sea of fire and force. What few enemies my artillery fails to destroy are left debilitated and disoriented, as willing to wound their friends as their foes, but unlikely to succeed at either."
"I see you still have reservations. Perhaps you've heard whispers that I hail from beyond the grave? I assure, those rumors, while not unfounded, are almost entirely fallacious. It's true that these bones no longer sustain the warmth one would expect in a living being, nor is it blood that pumps through my veins. And yes, I do spend my nights awake, pursuing studies that many of my colleagues deem occult. But Sarenrae's warmth still removes my wounds, and I certainly have no hunger for the flesh of the living. I hesitate to confess that none without leaves and roots need fear these gnashers."
"But I fear you have other pressing obligations. After you've consulted my references, you may call on me at the Grand Lodge. I bid you adieu."
"Oh, and one more thing: if you cannot find companions worthy of my boons or wise enough to apply them well, pray save my time and their good health by leaving my talents for a more suitable mission."
With that, the tiefling stands and bows once more as an almost unseen tail ferries a colorless potion to his hand. A single drink, a barely audible popping, and he is gone.
(Azimuth Ingersoll, Alchemist 12)
I'm a guild leader and interviewer sitting behind a large desk covered in numerous applications, letters, and notes.
You are the enterprising adventurer and interviewee who has come to sign up for the grand quest through the dangerous land in the hopes of obtaining the glorious treasure.
How might you go about explaining your character's mechanical strengths and weaknesses to me, in game, without bringing down the fourth wall?
Please post your in-game response in your post, then post the metagame information in a spoiler, like so:
Good afternoon sir. I am Daren Mott, also known as "the Northern Giant," martial artist and traveling sage. I am as swift as a crane, and as ferocious as a dragon. Like the dragon, I exemplify physical prowess, supernatural cunning, and potent magical ability. I am a master of the quarterstaff and am quite competent in a myriad of other weapons, common and exotic alike. You would not regret hiring me for this venture, as I can serve you and your team as a capable scout, accomplished spellcaster, or fearsome skirmisher. I am equally comfortable in the open field, dark dungeon, or alien demesnes.
** spoiler omitted **
I'm hoping this thread will allow people to become more comfortable describing abstract game mechanics in a manner that makes sense within the context of the campaign world. In short, a thought exercise.
Lol, my character goes to a job interview? Urgh, real life intrudes again. You are breaking the fourth wall!
The answer is my char would seek out the opportunities on his own or with his group, gather the intel and set off without need of an interview. Damn chaotic adventurers. Thieves, brigands and murder hobos need no stinking job interview.
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Krom Barbarian. Krom smash good. Krom am about level 12/mythic tier 6.
Puny man got problem with that? Then puny man get SMASHED!
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Krom laugh at your four stages of interview!
WHAT? NO MOGG SMASH. MOGG FIND NEW FRIEND? MOGG SMASH FRIEND
A rail-thin hooded man enters. Without a sound beyond a creaking knee, he sits down, his face still in shadow from his worn black cloak's hood. Around his waist is a simple frayed rope.
"Perhaps you have heard of me... I am Delgath the Rotted."
He removes his hood, revealing a face the colour of bleached porcelain, skin sagging over what used to be muscles. He does not smile, indeed, his face seems utterly unsuited to doing so.
"I heard you are mounting an expedition. Good. That interests me. I have an offer to make you."
Another long pause.
"I see you have been recruiting for a little while. I am sure the heroes-du-jour have been pestering you already. As I am sure you understand, while a farmboy with a knife can be useful, he remains a farmboy. I have a completely different model for the expedition."
He closes his eyes for a little while, then trains his cold eyes on you as he pushes a small leather pouch your way.
"Hire them all. Then serve them a little welcoming drink containing this. After that, I will make the farmboys into something infinitely more useful."
He doesn't seem to be the mirthful type, otherwise he might have chuckled.
"For a mere fifty per cent of your profit, I provide you with not having to pay the farmboys, the stable hands, indeed anyone else in the caravan. I have all the obsidian I need to provide this. As I am sure you understand, I am a master of the dead, a necromancer. My magic is tuned to death, and I can both deal it and defy it, should I wish. Even regarding other magical arts, there are few who even come close to my knowledge."
He sits there for a while, studying you.
"Of course, you may come to another conclusion. If you do, remember that my expertise also covers poison and disease."
Other response, definitely botch up the interview, just to see what happens.
Charismatic swordsman or knight acts like a complete dolt, to see if the bureaucrat falls for it and what conclusions they jump to.
A requirement of a social performance can turn out very funny, or the dm could punish the player for not playing along as he intended.
Example:
Player: so I deliberately fail it pretty hard, stutter, gaps in memory, delays, knock things off their desk.
Dm: ...
Player: I'll make a bluff to seem inept. Okay, 23.
Dm: that is pretty inept. You don't get the job.
Player: just like real life eh?
Dm: :(
Player: so where do we go from here?
You see, this seems to be a variant of another scene that was forced on a pc I was running, a not so joyous piece of railroading. So on a merc frontier everything was very official, it became quite dull. Interview, recorded name, signature, magic bindings so that you would be forever marked as an oath-breaker, if you broke any part of the contract. It was quite annoying for the chaotic rogue I was playing and I did not go along. Didn't sign anything, barely gave any intel or information. I didn't sit down to play a game of excitement filled fantasy to go through a job interview, holy Groetus.
I remember walking into the guild leader's office and the first thing I noticed was the wart. It's the first thing you'll notice about guild leaders. They always have a wart. It's an immutable law of the universe.
This man's wart was on his crooked nose. No, seriously, he was some green paint, a pointed hat and flying monkey away from being the Wicked Witch of the West. I considered the flask of water at my side. Maybe if I melted him I could take his job. A sort of "you kill it, you bought it" kind of deal. Yeah, probably not.
On his desk was a sign. It read "Tell me what strengths you bring to the table and what weaknesses the party I place you in must cover for." He pointed at the sign and grunted. A man of few words. I could live with that, being a man of more words than necessary, myself.
I considered for a moment. "Well...
I am the very model of a college trained American!
I've studied engineering, both electrical and robotican.
I'm quite good at lying (which might be a pathology),
because I am an expert (which I know is a tautology).
Ability to craft ranges from jewelry to armor I can-
I am the very model of a college trained American!" Singing that probably wasn't the best choice, and it left some things out, especially my magical training. But you do better on the spot with no prep time. So, in order to add in my wizardly skills, I followed up my performance with "Also, I can kill you with my brain." Nailed it.
I also had to let him know about my deficiencies. "Well, I'm not the greatest man. I am not as swift as the coursing river. Nor do I have all the force of a great typhoon, unless you count force of personality. I do not have all the strength of a raging fire. Perhaps more like a decent sized torch. And I'm not even sure how one would define being 'as mysterious as the dark side of the moon'." I paused a moment. "On the other hand, after that month I spent as a woman, if I was needed for some kind of undercover work as a woman, I could probably do well enough. And I did mention the part about being able to kill you with my brain, right?" He nodded.
"Cool. I'll be outside. I was busy translating a conversation between that elf and goblin in the lobby when you called me in. And I need to finish translating this book from ancient Thassilonian soon or my publisher will have my head."