Just for that you'll have to wait until next year for a new rant.
Rant incoming!
Welcome back Rant fans! This rant is all about our neighbors in the Great White North, aka Canadians. Personally, I have no (expletive deleted) beefs with Canada. They seem like nice people and Ryan Reynolds is Canadian and he’s a cool guy so really I have nothing to complain about….except how (expletive deleted) polite these people are. Who do they (expletive deleted) think they are? I mean…nope, I just can’t do it. Doing a rant about Canadians is like kicking a puppy, and I don’t want to be that (expletive deleted) guy. That guy is the guy nobody likes, the (expletive deleted) elitist dirtbag who thinks his (expletive deleted) doesn’t smell. Well guess what pal, it does. Man do I hate those guys. I even feel bad when I watch South Park episodes where they make fun of Canadians. I mean I’ve never met any Canadians personally but I hear lots of good things about them. So, because I’m not going to rant about Canadians…I guess I’ll rant about Cold Weather. That’s pretty topical if you live above the equator. Cold weather (expletive deleted) sucks…you know what I’m really not feeling too good about this rant. I mean ranting about (expletive deleted) French people is one thing but I just can’t shake the feeling of how wrong this feels. It’s like on the Simpsons when Homer gets mad at Flanders for being a nice guy. Seriously, how can you be mad at someone so nice? Whatever, this (expletive deleted) rant is over.
Tune in next time when I rant about…Ginger Gnomes. Is this a South Park reference? Because that’s hilarious as I just (expletive deleted) made a South Park reference in this very rant.
Additional bonus ranting comments: I just realized that Justin Bieber and Celine Dion are both Canadian. So now, I’m taking back all the nice things I said about Canadians and wish to say they can (expletive deleted) their (expletive deleted) while their “prime minister” (expletive deleted) all over the (expletive deleted) faces of those two (expletive deleted).
Updated list:
Ginger Gnomes
Hot Weather
Power Outages
“Performance Anxiety”
Being sick
Cyclist who ride their bikes in the middle of the road at night.
I have kept my end of the bargain. Now post for me monkeys.
Type this, rant-boy. ;-)
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I am glad the rants have still been coming. I would like to see some new rants this year and I will work on posting more often as well. But in my defense I have been away in Belize and honestly there is not really a reliable internet down there making going on line more of a hassle than anything else. But it was a great vacation nice to get away from technology for a little bit.
Moar! Moar!
Wait so are we supposed to rant in here too? Because I very definitely can.
All rants are welcome.
I'm assuming you are all out there making new rants.
+2 Rant Points
You have to look it up in the CRB*.
*Core Rant Book
{searches through CRB} Are rants considered vermin, swarms, or both? {gently taps glass on her rant farm, puts it back on the counter}
Rants are not monsters.
I take it we are taking weekends off?
No games, football is decidedly going not-as-expected, have to work in a minute or three...
I've been busy banging my head on my desk RE: a certain thread in Advice.
Word of Advice: When you feel like hurting yourself, it may be time to take an extended break from the Advice Forum.
Yeah I'm about to bid the forums adieu for the night as a whole.
Why does it feel like this thread is being pushed to the bottom of the list every day? What do the other threads have against this one?
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Yes, I believe that you are right.
Nice try other threads. You can't keep this thread down.
Rise up, my comrade threads, and overthrow the oppression of the plutocratic FAWTL and Did You Know...? threads!
I really wanted to link a video to that song.
Doodlebug knew what I was looking for.
Elvis...was a hero to most
Elvis...was a hero to most
Elvis...was a hero to most
But he never meant shiznit to me!
Years later, I read an article with Chuck D where he, basically, apologized for that verse and went on to say that growing up his family had all of the Elvis gospel records.
Also, if you can't tell the lady/gentleman on the other end of the speaker what you want for fastfood lunch in under 30 seconds, then "NO F&!@ING SOUP FOR YOU!" If you attempt to order a vegetarian sandwich made-up in-your-f!*!ing-head and completely off the menu at a fast food drive-in speaker, and then loudly give the poor order taker crap for it, you and your genetically-cursed hatchlings should crash your 2013 Cayenne Porsche and die in the fire. And all you f$#~ers at the bank drive-in tellers, who pull up to the teller and then pick up the blank banking slip to fill it out? You do not understand the depths of my restraint that I do not grab my tire iron from the trunk and beat you into an inconsiderate bloody pulp. Do you know ultimately why I don't? Because killing a s%!%ty person would hold up the f$#+ing line, you self-centered a~&!&~&!
When the Mad Max Pocy-Clypse/zombiegeddon goes down, I'm killing all these inconsiderate m$+*$+~@#&@~s first.
Rough day, Ms. Slaad?
Just accumulated anger, built-up over a couple months and shoved down deep for a rainy day.
Humans are beginning to feel like poison ivy: over time, repeated exposure lowers one's resistance.
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F~++ing pinkskins.
Anyone can rant here, eh?
Eyup.
** spoiler omitted **
+2 Rant points.
Anyone can rant here, eh?
Yes. Even though this thread has my name on it, the idea is that anyone can rant here and I only put my name on it because I started the thread. If you think about it, it's kind of like a restaurant where it has someone's name on the outside but when you look at the menu there are all of these dishes that talk about someone else's name and how it got on the menu.
I've been really busy. I suppose sometime I should try to find time to put out a new rant.
I'm thinking about starting a thread entitled "JMD031 answers none of your questions". Its a thread where I completely dodge every question with things like "I don't know" and "Maybe".
I'd read it. Might be "that guy who's always answering questions and starting them with 'IANJMD but...'."
Rant incoming:
Why is it that everyone thinks that they know everything there is to know about real estate when they don't know a [expletive deleted] thing about it? These 'tards insist that their house is worth forty grand more than the local market says it could be worth if it had all the in-demand updates, remodeled bathrooms, enough bathrooms, floors in good-to-excellent shape instead of starting to come up of the subfloor, a fairly new roof instead of a roof teetering on the edge of extermination by windstorm and all the other sh&t that's wrong with their "top dollar" house?! Get a [expletive] [deleted] [redacted] CLUE!! That's what the professionals DO for a [redacted, seriously, for good reason] living! LISTEN to what they're telling you! [deletive] [expleted] sunsa[redacted] idiots. News flash: your place is probably not the in-demand crib in your neighborhood that you think it is. Get yer [expletive] [deleted] [redacted] financial house in order. Get the [deleted] prequalification letter from a bank that doesn't have [redacted] in it so you know what you can afford and what kind of financing you're going to have to go with. If your last agent was a [expletive] gooberhead, get a referral from some one. There's less than HALF of the agents in play now than there were not even four years ago. The chuckleheads are professionally dying like flies. And for the love of [deity or deities of choice] don't fall for the delusion that your mauve and pink paint scheme and mounds of STUFF are going to make your place appealing to the buying public! Potential buyers do NOT want to see YOUR house. They WANT to see THEIR house. Generic may be boring, but it is EFFECTIVE. Fix all the broken stuff, get the lawn, deck, porch, patio and exterior in passable shape. You want top dollar? Your house has to look good enough to GET .... pause for effect ... top dollar. [expletive string resembling chaos theory redacted] morons.
Hmm, I like the alternative ways of covering up the curse words. +2 rant points.