Where to hide an undestroyable artifact


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I am DMing in the planescape universe. I am having an artifact the can kill gods. It is completely indestructible. Because they could not destroy it the gods did the next best thing and hide it. Where do you hide something you never what to be found?

I have already thought of the plane of negative energy, but there are people of a sort there.


In a vault underneath a castle in a warding box.

Worked for the *spoiler*.

Scarab Sages

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On a demi plain created by all the Gods together, that nulls all God powers on the plain, and when you go there no magic is allowed at all, and there is no way off that plain.


couldn't am barbarian just sunder that plane?

Scarab Sages

Nope.
Anti magic field all around the plain.
Sunder is an SU abbilty, therefor is oppressed.
And it would be like a barb sundering the materiel plain?

Sovereign Court

Placed in indestructible box that prevents scrying etc.

Swallowed by a god.


You hide it inside Sigil's Lady of Pain's heart. It is responsible for Sigil's god-null.


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In plain sight. Always in plain sight. Hiding crap in "secret dungeon of secret secretness filled with MYSTERIES and WONDER" is a great way to guarantee adventurers finding it.

Put it in a book on candlemaking in some third rate library on the material.


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You know what. Screw it. Hide it inside a concept. A literal concept. Watch people search for somethign literal when you actually put it inside the color yellow, or mortality, or in the idea of a right angle.

Welcome to planescape. S&&# gets weird yo.


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fictionfan wrote:
couldn't am barbarian just sunder that plane?

BARBARIAN AM ONLY ABLE TO SUNDER DEMIPLANES CREATED BY SPELLS OR SPELL LIKE ABILITIES. AM BE ABLE TO DO THIS MAYBE, BUT WOULD HAVE TO BE STANDING JUST OUTSIDE OF DEMIPLANE AND HAVE DEMIPLANE IN REACH. NEED TO BE GATE OR SOMETHING. LAST TIME BARBARIAN AM RUNNING INTO THIS PROBLEM, AM NOT GATE THERE, HAVE TO GET CASTY TO USE GATE TO SUNDER.

TURNED INTO BIG THING... AM HAVING TO SUNDER OTHER SIDE OF GATE, NOT GATE. TAKE BARBARIAN MANY TRIES TO GET RIGHT; CASTY RAN OUT OF 9TH LEVEL SPELLS LIKE SIX TIMES. OK, MAYBE AFTER FIRST THREE CASTS BARBARIAN DOING ON PURPOSE JUST TO MAKE CASTY CRY. BARBARIAN ENJOY CASTY TEARS... AM LIKE SWEET SUGAR OR CURE LIGHT WOUNDS POTION TO BARBARIAN.

...BARBARIAN GENERALLY PREFER JUST CHARGE GOD AND MURDER WITH RAGELANCEPOUNCE. AM WORKING FOR BARBARIAN SO FAR.


AM BARBARIAN wrote:
fictionfan wrote:
couldn't am barbarian just sunder that plane?

BARBARIAN AM ONLY ABLE TO SUNDER DEMIPLANES CREATED BY SPELLS OR SPELL LIKE ABILITIES. AM BE ABLE TO DO THIS MAYBE, BUT WOULD HAVE TO BE STANDING JUST OUTSIDE OF DEMIPLANE AND HAVE DEMIPLANE IN REACH. NEED TO BE GATE OR SOMETHING. LAST TIME BARBARIAN AM RUNNING INTO THIS PROBLEM, AM NOT GATE THERE, HAVE TO GET CASTY TO USE GATE TO SUNDER.

TURNED INTO BIG THING... AM HAVING TO SUNDER OTHER SIDE OF GATE, NOT GATE. TAKE BARBARIAN MANY TRIES TO GET RIGHT; CASTY RAN OUT OF 9TH LEVEL SPELLS LIKE SIX TIMES. OK, MAYBE AFTER FIRST THREE CASTS BARBARIAN DOING ON PURPOSE JUST TO MAKE CASTY CRY. BARBARIAN ENJOY CASTY TEARS... AM LIKE SWEET SUGAR OR CURE LIGHT WOUNDS POTION TO BARBARIAN.

...BARBARIAN GENERALLY PREFER JUST CHARGE GOD AND MURDER WITH RAGELANCEPOUNCE. AM WORKING FOR BARBARIAN SO FAR.

Actually hide it in the concept of AM BARBARIAN. Not the person mind you but the concept. In order to get to the artifact you ahve to destroy the concept and erase him and all other AM BARBARIAN'S from existence.

Have fun with that.

Liberty's Edge

why hide it? you would think the most powerful god would just keep it. That way they have it on hand to keep safe and to add to there own power if someone tries to take it


Sigil87 wrote:
why hide it? you would think the most powerful god would just keep it. That way they have it on hand to keep safe and to add to there own power if someone tries to take it

Politics.

You and you alone have a weapon capable of destroying all others. How long do you think you would last with all the others arrayed against you?

Easier to simply have it in no ones possession.

Scarab Sages

AM BARBARIAN wrote:
fictionfan wrote:
couldn't am barbarian just sunder that plane?

BARBARIAN AM ONLY ABLE TO SUNDER DEMIPLANES CREATED BY SPELLS OR SPELL LIKE ABILITIES. AM BE ABLE TO DO THIS MAYBE, BUT WOULD HAVE TO BE STANDING JUST OUTSIDE OF DEMIPLANE AND HAVE DEMIPLANE IN REACH. NEED TO BE GATE OR SOMETHING. LAST TIME BARBARIAN AM RUNNING INTO THIS PROBLEM, AM NOT GATE THERE, HAVE TO GET CASTY TO USE GATE TO SUNDER.

TURNED INTO BIG THING... AM HAVING TO SUNDER OTHER SIDE OF GATE, NOT GATE. TAKE BARBARIAN MANY TRIES TO GET RIGHT; CASTY RAN OUT OF 9TH LEVEL SPELLS LIKE SIX TIMES. OK, MAYBE AFTER FIRST THREE CASTS BARBARIAN DOING ON PURPOSE JUST TO MAKE CASTY CRY. BARBARIAN ENJOY CASTY TEARS... AM LIKE SWEET SUGAR OR CURE LIGHT WOUNDS POTION TO BARBARIAN.

...BARBARIAN GENERALLY PREFER JUST CHARGE GOD AND MURDER WITH RAGELANCEPOUNCE. AM WORKING FOR BARBARIAN SO FAR.

In this case its not from a spell or a spell like abbilty,

Its a small part of essence from each of the Gods.


I would hide the artifact in a museum with a sign that says "replica of artifact X". That'll throw anyone looking for it.

Or put it in a secret chest (as per the spell) and forget about it so it becomes lost in the ethereal plane.


Best answer I can think of:
Cast it into the darkness between the stars, or into one of them, preferably a dark star.


In a realm which only exists within the belly of a tarrasque


The reason this is so difficult is because, as a DM, you need to decide whether it is completely lost (which is the easy solution, since you can just handwave it as something that the gods did to hide it for all eternity) or if you want it to be discovered after the end of a long and arduous epic-level quest (which is the hard solution, because you not only need to come up with a really good place to hide it, but also a reason why nobody else has found it yet).

Liberty's Edge

It was cast into the end of time. The only way to get it is to go there, which only creatures outside of normal time can do (which most likely means elder gods only).

Silver Crusade

Cult of Vorg wrote:
You hide it inside Sigil's Lady of Pain's heart. It is responsible for Sigil's god-null.

To get to it, you must get the Lady of Pain to open her heart to you.

...and suddenly the campaign becomes a roleplaying challenge with a difficulty on par with I Wanna Be The Guy.


Cult of Vorg wrote:
You hide it inside Sigil's Lady of Pain's heart. It is responsible for Sigil's god-null.

I like that. Alternatively, the artifact is the Lady of Pain, and Sigil is the cage build to keep her locked up. She certainly isn't above destroying gods.


portable hole + bag of holding = lost forever. thats how to deal with artifacts


Just give it to me. I won't let it get into the wrong hands.

Because it's already in the right hands. We can use it to unmake this reality already.

Or perhaps I shouldn't have said that.


Put artifact in left sock

Put left sock in dryer.

Seriously, do even gods know where these left socks go?

Liberty's Edge

Alakqualyn wrote:
portable hole + bag of holding = lost forever. thats how to deal with artifacts

"If a portable hole is placed within a bag of holding, it opens a gate to the Astral Plane."

I'm pretty sure "Astral Plane" doesn't equal "Lost forever".

The Demiplane is by far the best idea so far.

Grand Lodge

When faced with a similar quandry the party I was running for hid the evil artifact in the privy. No-one ever looked for it there.


in a timeless timeplane with antimagic field everywhere and the portal shut trough mundane means that are 99.9% undestroyable, like a sphere of 1 mile diameter of pure adamantium around it.

Oh and before you do all that put as many golems as you can on the whole plane.


Inside the center of a hollow sphere of annihilation that is, in itself, inside further hollow spheres of annihilation like one of those Russian dolls. And then put that in New Jersey.


fictionfan wrote:
... Where do you hide something you never what to be found? ...

In the sun


ciretose wrote:
Alakqualyn wrote:
portable hole + bag of holding = lost forever. thats how to deal with artifacts

"If a portable hole is placed within a bag of holding, it opens a gate to the Astral Plane."

I'm pretty sure "Astral Plane" doesn't equal "Lost forever".

The Demiplane is by far the best idea so far.

i was reading what happened when you put the bag into the hole not the hole into the bag


The Tarasque is known to swallow odd things every now and then.


EWHM wrote:
Cast it into the darkness between the stars, or into one of them, preferably a dark star.

Sounds an awful lot like hiding it in The Far Realm, and I don't know if we necessarily want creatures from The Far destroying Gods. :V Give it to the Doomguard. You can totally trust Pentar with a god-killing artifact.

Seriously though? Hrm. Is this a question of "where is the best place for the PCs to hide it," or "where is the best place some NPCs have hidden it, and subsequently where the PCs will find it?"

I'm thinking the ideal stash spot is going to be the base of the Spire. You'll have to trust someone with it, when it comes right down to it, and I suspect the Rilmani are the safest group of people to risk finding the thing. Second to the base of the Spire is ... the Hinterlands, maybe. If you're only trying to hide it from evil beings, Elysium is a good idea, but since you're not just giving the thing to some high-up good deity, the idea is probably not "here guys, kill all the evil gods. Have at it!"

... Hold up, I've changed my mind. Hide it in Faerun.


EWHM wrote:
...Cast it into the darkness between the stars ...

Galactic escape velocity.

Perpendicular to the galactic plane.
Along with a NON-sentient construct that can use telekenisis to randomly alter the trajectory slightly every so often.
God level nondetection on both of them.


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Anetra wrote:
Hide it in Faerun.

I'd put it in a 4e module. No one will find it there.


The sun.


Lastoth wrote:
Anetra wrote:
Hide it in Faerun.
I'd put it in a 4e module. No one will find it there.

I was being totes serious, though. Someone will find it on Faerun, sure, but chances are that whoever it is will be so focused on FAERUN IS THE CENTER OF EVERYTHIIIIING that they'll mess up Faerun something mighty fierce with it instead of going off-Prime and, at the end of the day, the issue is contained.


AM BARBARIAN wrote:
fictionfan wrote:
couldn't am barbarian just sunder that plane?

BARBARIAN AM ONLY ABLE TO SUNDER DEMIPLANES CREATED BY SPELLS OR SPELL LIKE ABILITIES. AM BE ABLE TO DO THIS MAYBE, BUT WOULD HAVE TO BE STANDING JUST OUTSIDE OF DEMIPLANE AND HAVE DEMIPLANE IN REACH. NEED TO BE GATE OR SOMETHING. LAST TIME BARBARIAN AM RUNNING INTO THIS PROBLEM, AM NOT GATE THERE, HAVE TO GET CASTY TO USE GATE TO SUNDER.

TURNED INTO BIG THING... AM HAVING TO SUNDER OTHER SIDE OF GATE, NOT GATE. TAKE BARBARIAN MANY TRIES TO GET RIGHT; CASTY RAN OUT OF 9TH LEVEL SPELLS LIKE SIX TIMES. OK, MAYBE AFTER FIRST THREE CASTS BARBARIAN DOING ON PURPOSE JUST TO MAKE CASTY CRY. BARBARIAN ENJOY CASTY TEARS... AM LIKE SWEET SUGAR OR CURE LIGHT WOUNDS POTION TO BARBARIAN.

...BARBARIAN GENERALLY PREFER JUST CHARGE GOD AND MURDER WITH RAGELANCEPOUNCE. AM WORKING FOR BARBARIAN SO FAR.

You just got this casty to cry of laughter. For real.


I'm not sure how it's indestructible? But wouldn't the base of the Spire on the outlands work. I seem to recall that being perfectly neutral ground where no magic works. Even the gods are magicless there and use it as a meeting place. Should render the artifact inert as well.
Which is why I don't see it as being indestructible. If it's powers are all repressed you should be able to break it like a normal item.
Maybe that's the key. The gods keep it in a place where it can be destroyed.


no such thing as unbreakable!
give it to my three year old son and wait 2 minutes
my son also thinks he is god!


You put it in the hands of Jimmy Hoffa's corpse.


Throw it into the Gaping mouth of the Tarrassq. Thats all you need to do. That or get a Bag of Devouring and keep opening and closing untill you get the portal to the stomach of the extra planar creature then toss it in. It will now be off the plane and out of your hands.


Give it to a squirrely looking halfing and have him hide in a cave for 500 years.

Contributor

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Xum wrote:
The sun.

I used to have a player who, every time there was an artifact or a bad guy or something that needed to be taken care of, would summon a celestial and yell "INTO THE SUN!" and make them teleport the evil whatever straight into the heart of a burning star. (After all, the celestials are selfless, and reform automatically on their home plane....)

While not exactly evil, it made the creatures he summoned a little twitchy.


BigNorseWolf wrote:

Put artifact in left sock

Put left sock in dryer.

Seriously, do even gods know where these left socks go?

"Left" sock? Are socks footed?


Evershifter wrote:
..."Left" sock? Are socks footed?

Toe socks are.


The demiplane idea only make it superficially resemble somewhere horrible, like the screaming planes of pandorum. That way would be plane shifter coudl just as easily end up in the wrong place.


James Sutter wrote:
Xum wrote:
The sun.

I used to have a player who, every time there was an artifact or a bad guy or something that needed to be taken care of, would summon a celestial and yell "INTO THE SUN!" and make them teleport the evil whatever straight into the heart of a burning star. (After all, the celestials are selfless, and reform automatically on their home plane....)

While not exactly evil, it made the creatures he summoned a little twitchy.

Finally a use for celestials.


fictionfan wrote:

I am DMing in the planescape universe. I am having an artifact the can kill gods. It is completely indestructible. Because they could not destroy it the gods did the next best thing and hide it. Where do you hide something you never what to be found?

I have already thought of the plane of negative energy, but there are people of a sort there.

In a (chest/room/dungeon/container of indeterminate size) accompanied by a ridiculous number of items of identical appearance.

I do like the 'inside a concept' ideas. Hiding it in Death or Murder would be fitting, if the concept needed destroyed to access the object.

But it seems more likely that you need your group to have a chance of recovering the macguffin, to slay a diety that needs done away with.

So, I'd put it at the end of a process that elevates those who traverse it to dieties themselves. Noob diety holding artifact designed to kill dieties comes into conflict with the artifact, and pwns himself :)


Hide it in nameless. Preferably imbedded in his brain. Thing is every nameless has a copy, and only one is real.

Shadow Lodge

I like the in plain sight option as well. Imagine it as a part of the adornment around the Fountain of Life. The fountain itself already emits an immense magical aura, and the artifact just blends right in with the scenery.

Now if you wanted to move it off-plane, I'd suggest Ravenloft over anything else. So you found it, great. Now, how do you get home? (Hint: you don't...)

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