"Is there a combination of words that more scary than 'Fully armed pack of frat bros?'"
...
"A gaggle of White Claws out there, up to no good."
I am dying here because Californians' understanding of wildlife is... lacking. First we have hundreds of videos of people being chased off by geese. Now we have a formal warning about being attacked by turkeys.
Um... birds have hollow bones and are less than 1/10th your weight. It's like any other fight -- you're going to get hit and it's going to hurt. And yet sheer bone mass and strength determines the winner. Of course, somehow geese and turkeys immediately recognize the humans who aren't going to run. The last time a goose attacked me it charged me, I moved aggressively towards it in return, and it was like, "Nope. Uh-uh. I'm gonna lose this fight badly."
Because yes, I know how to clean and prep a bird for roasting. And if it attacks me, it volunteered for the honor.
The university I went to had tons of Canadian geese during certain months. They were frequently very aggressive, and you couldn't do anything about it. Even if all you did was stand your ground and yell back when they honked at you, you could be fined by the campus police for "harassing a protected species". In practice, you would likely just be told to walk away instead of standing up to them, but the possibility existed. As did the possibility, or rather likelihood, that someone would see you and write an exaggerated column in the campus paper saying that you (not by name, but it was a small school so people could find out who it was easily) were "attacking the beautiful, harmless, and oppressed wildlife". So, people would walk/run away from the geese, which made them bolder, so more people would run, and the cycle would continue.
My last year, there was talk of having wildlife specialists go out and...
A food creature that attacks you is food, reputation be damned. But yeah, protected wildlife might be an issue. But I somehow doubt the turkeys are protected...
EDIT: And their reading of human body language is excellent. My friend and I attacked a gaggle of geese with intent to kill (they pecked a friend). Those geese knew damned well what we intended to do and we couldn't lay a finger on any of them.
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Fantasy Monster: Clock-Not-Work Gremlin
Tick-tock-tick... Oh, wait... It seems to be going the wrong way... No worries! It can be fixed!
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I am dying here because Californians' understanding of wildlife is... lacking."Is there a combination of words that more scary than 'Fully armed pack of frat bros?'"
...
"A gaggle of White Claws out there, up to no good."
LMAO. I will NEVER forget the time I was with the kids at a park in the Berkeley Hills (Arlington Park, NH), and a group of idiot parents were freaking out because there was a "giant scorpion" in the creek.
(This is not the Silurian Era, scorpions are no longer aquatic, and back then "giant" meant eight feet long.)
So I went to look.
It was a crayfish.
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I am dying here because Californians' understanding of wildlife is... lacking."Is there a combination of words that more scary than 'Fully armed pack of frat bros?'"
...
"A gaggle of White Claws out there, up to no good."
LMAO. I will NEVER forget the time I was with the kids at a park in the Berkeley Hills (Arlington Park, NH), and a group of idiot parents were freaking out because there was a "giant scorpion" in the creek.
(This is not the Silurian Era, scorpions are no longer aquatic, and back then "giant" meant eight feet long.)
So I went to look.
It was a crayfish.
Shiro will never forget when he was driving to Mount Fremont for some astronomy and a woman flagged him down to warn him of "a mutant dog, or maybe a bear, hiding in the bushes over there."
It was a deer. And she literally did not know what it was. She kept trying to get HIM to call Animal Control to come deal with it. Because... um.. she couldn't use a phone herself?
It *is* fun working with the kids on the local nocturnal wildlife. Something dug a massive hole in our yard trying to burrow under the cat tree. Impus Major immediately thought, "Gopher," because that's what you learn from media: Only gophers can possibly dig holes.
But:
(1) Gophers are surprisingly small,
(2) their holes are sized for them, and
(3) they don't burn effort making massive, wide, shallow holes.
It took a remarkably long time to get them to, "What nocturnal creature is local to this area, is not afraid of the smell of cats, and digs large holes looking for worms and other insects to eat?"
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Shiro will never forget when he was driving to Mount Fremont for some astronomy and a woman flagged him down to warn him of "a mutant dog, or maybe a bear, hiding in the bushes over there."
It was a deer. And she literally did not know what it was. She kept trying to get HIM to call Animal Control to come deal with it. Because... um.. she couldn't use a phone herself?
What horrors might she have realized? Might it be possible that -
Ahem. Rumours of CIA collaboration with teratogenic experiments by secret elven ecoterrorist freedom fighter cells are wildly misplaced. Beyond discouraging fanciful, irresponsible speculation, Elfhame has released no official statement at this time. ;)
... I may have fond memories of some dorky Shadowrun adventures.
It *is* fun working with the kids on the local nocturnal wildlife. Something dug a massive hole in our yard trying to burrow under the cat tree. Impus Major immediately thought, "Gopher," because that's what you learn from media: Only gophers can possibly dig holes.
But:
(1) Gophers are surprisingly small,
(2) their holes are sized for them, and
(3) they don't burn effort making massive, wide, shallow holes.It took a remarkably long time to get them to, "What nocturnal creature is local to this area, is not afraid of the smell of cats, and digs large holes looking for worms and other insects to eat?"
Interesting. Very interesting.
Shiro will never forget when he was driving to Mount Fremont for some astronomy and a woman flagged him down to warn him of "a mutant dog, or maybe a bear, hiding in the bushes over there."
It was a deer. And she literally did not know what it was. She kept trying to get HIM to call Animal Control to come deal with it. Because... um.. she couldn't use a phone herself?
What horrors might she have realized? Might it be possible that -
Ahem. Rumours of CIA collaboration with teratogenic experiments by secret elven eco
terroristfreedom fighter cells are wildly misplaced. Beyond discouraging fanciful, irresponsible speculation, Elfhame has released no official statement at this time. ;)... I may have fond memories of some dorky Shadowrun adventures.
Wiz, chummer
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It took a remarkably long time to get them to, "What nocturnal creature is local to this area, is not afraid of the smell of cats, and digs large holes ... for worms...?"
None of the Imps resembles young Kevin Bacon, do they?
I am not sure if that's good or bad...
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Shiro will never forget when he was driving to Mount Fremont for some astronomy and a woman flagged him down to warn him of "a mutant dog, or maybe a bear, hiding in the bushes over there."
It was a deer. And she literally did not know what it was. She kept trying to get HIM to call Animal Control to come deal with it. Because... um.. she couldn't use a phone herself?
Oh, deer...
It's kind of amusing/embarrassing to learn that you've been damned with faint praise.
For the last 10 or so years in MMORPGs I've played tank. The job is pretty simple: Make sure every creature is angry at you, keep them in a group so your damage-dealers (DPSes) can cast area-of-effect spells, and monitor your health and use damage reduction to help the healer as needed.
Healers talk about what a great tank I am. I thought that was because I did all the little extras: Keep boss monsters pointed in a uniform direction so all the flanking-based DPSes can get in their flanking bonuses. Cast group protects just before boss AoEs to reduce the impact on healers. If there's a new person in an instance, go slow so they have time to look around.
Nope. I've started in as a healer (my previous job) on an alternate character and I'm doing dungeons with random groups. And I have yet to find a tank who manages anything beyond, "Make sure every creature is angry at you."
Slow down? NEVER!
Use damage mitigation? Why bother? That's the healer's job.
Let new people explore? Nope.
Dungeon after dungeon it's, "Pull everything I possibly can and it's the healer's job to keep me standing, and go in a direct start-to-finish line without any exploration at all."
Not a fan.
And gee, "You're better than most tanks I encounter," suddenly isn't much of a compliment...
It's kind of amusing/embarrassing to learn that you've been damned with faint praise.
For the last 10 or so years in MMORPGs I've played tank. The job is pretty simple: Make sure every creature is angry at you, keep them in a group so your damage-dealers (DPSes) can cast area-of-effect spells, and monitor your health and use damage reduction to help the healer as needed.
Healers talk about what a great tank I am. I thought that was because I did all the little extras: Keep boss monsters pointed in a uniform direction so all the flanking-based DPSes can get in their flanking bonuses. Cast group protects just before boss AoEs to reduce the impact on healers. If there's a new person in an instance, go slow so they have time to look around.
Nope. I've started in as a healer (my previous job) on an alternate character and I'm doing dungeons with random groups. And I have yet to find a tank who manages anything beyond, "Make sure every creature is angry at you."
Slow down? NEVER!
Use damage mitigation? Why bother? That's the healer's job.
Let new people explore? Nope.Dungeon after dungeon it's, "Pull everything I possibly can and it's the healer's job to keep me standing, and go in a direct start-to-finish line without any exploration at all."
Not a fan.
And gee, "You're better than most tanks I encounter," suddenly isn't much of a compliment...
This is why I hate mmos.
Nope. I've started in as a healer (my previous job) on an alternate character and I'm doing dungeons with random groups. And I have yet to find a tank who manages anything beyond, "Make sure every creature is angry at you."
Slow down? NEVER!
Use damage mitigation? Why bother? That's the healer's job.
Let new people explore? Nope.Dungeon after dungeon it's, "Pull everything I possibly can and it's the healer's job to keep me standing, and go in a direct start-to-finish line without any exploration at all."
Not a fan.
And gee, "You're better than most tanks I encounter," suddenly isn't much of a compliment...
Part of that might be that tanking in some MMOs is really easy unless you run higher difficulties/challenge modes/so on, and only some specific bosses/fights are demanding during baseline runs because of specific mechanics.
Another part might be that people weren't taught any better, and a final part is that people can be simply careless...
Part of that might be that tanking in some MMOs is really easy unless you run higher difficulties/challenge modes/so on, and only some specific bosses/fights are demanding during baseline runs because of specific mechanics.Nope. I've started in as a healer (my previous job) on an alternate character and I'm doing dungeons with random groups. And I have yet to find a tank who manages anything beyond, "Make sure every creature is angry at you."
Slow down? NEVER!
Use damage mitigation? Why bother? That's the healer's job.
Let new people explore? Nope.Dungeon after dungeon it's, "Pull everything I possibly can and it's the healer's job to keep me standing, and go in a direct start-to-finish line without any exploration at all."
Not a fan.
And gee, "You're better than most tanks I encounter," suddenly isn't much of a compliment...
That's a very fair point. Base FFXIV is a "cozy" game; you have to work hard to get yourself in trouble (and these tanks do). There are additional tiers for people who want greater challenges (extreme, then unreal or savage, then chaotic). My friends and I consider the extremes to be fun, light entertainment, and unreals are slightly below our level, while savages take practice. And on those, proper technique is essential for every role.
Another part might be that people weren't taught any better, and a final part is that people can be simply careless...
It's unfortunately even worse -- there are a multitude of YouTube videos out there showing horrible technique. Hi ended up being a MUCH worse healer because he kept seeing all these YouTube videos saying, "If you're not contributing 15% to the damage as a healer, you're crap."
Which doesn't even begin to apply before the savage tier. And parties wiping because the healer wasn't doing their job has become its own genre of derogatory video/meme: "Green DPS". This is a nice short on-topic YouTube video of the sort.| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I started putting my dangaioh model kit together. I haven't put a kit together in literally 20 years.
20 years.
Holy s@!%.
But yeah. Started today.
It has been said that skunks and cats interbreed. Beware that you don’t end up with some skitties…
"I peeled and chopped a ton of garlic yesterday, and my fingers still smell strongly of garlic. This has reminded me that I am, in fact, made of meat, and thus am susceptible to being seasoned."
youre delicious.
I prefer "scrum-diddly-umptious"."I peeled and chopped a ton of garlic yesterday, and my fingers still smell strongly of garlic. This has reminded me that I am, in fact, made of meat, and thus am susceptible to being seasoned."youre delicious.
I promise to hold one less room party due to this hilarious reference.