The Haiku Game

[Chris Mortika]

Everyone just laughs
when the unjust are, at last,
sentenced for their crimes.

[drunken_nomad]

Sentenced for their crimes
Dangling participle noose
Travels to the grave

[Cuchulainn]

Travels to the grave
Made by gravy trains daily
Your soul is at steak

[Chris Mortika]

Your soul is at Steak
'n' Shake, haunting the restraunt
where your heart gave out.

[Cuchulainn]

Where your heart gave out
cookies to little children,
Your spleen kicked puppies

[Charles Scholz]

Your spleen kicked puppies
every time you thought of
eating a Big Mac

[therealthom]

Eating a Big Mac
Truck is so not the way to
say "supersize me".

sorry the carried phrases aren't truly Haiku, but I couldn't resist.

Edit: OF course there's an excellent precedent several posts before. Now I don't feel so bad.

[Cuchulainn]

Say, "supersize me"
And the spell will take effect
The ladies will swoon

[TheChozyn]

The ladies will swoon
Over the smell of my feet
Odor Eaters please

[Chris Mortika]

Odor Eaters please
everybody when they go
gobbling up otyughs.

[drunken_nomad]

Gobbling up otyughs
Smearing black puddings on toast
Lost my iron rations

[TheChozyn]

Lost my iron rations
Haven't seen Iron Man 2
Irony helps puns

[Charles Scholz]

Irony helps puns
Go down with a helping of
Sackcloth and ashes

[Charlie Bell]

Sackcloth and ashes
Will be your assigned penance
For puns in haiku

[Cuchulainn]

For puns in haiku
Rarely fit into three lines
Not enough space to

[Chris Mortika]

Not enough space to
swing that spiked chain when robbing
crypts of the mole-folk.

[Cuchulainn]

Crypts of the Mole-Folk
A Pathfinder Adventure
For small characters

[therealthom]

For small characters
I do like Times New Roman
It's easy to read

[Charles Scholz]

It's easy to read
All one need to know is your
Basic ABC's

[TheChozyn]

Basic ABC's
It's easy as 123's
On Sesame Street

[Chris Mortika]

On Sesame Street,
my barbarian slew the
snuffalumpagus.

[TheChozyn]

snuffalumpagus
Was originally fake
Big Bird's on Acid

[Chris Mortika]

Strange story about that:

Spoiler:

At first, only Big Bird was around when snuffy visited, and nobody else would believe Big Bird when he insisted that the snuffalumpagus was real. Then some child psychologists realized that this modeled child abuse, when the parents refused to believe a child, despite his insistence that something that was happening when they weren't around. So there came the episode where everybody was around when snuffalumpagus came visiting, and Big Bird introduced him to all his other friends.

Big Bird's on acid
and it's soooo cool! He can see
other muppets' feet.

[Xabulba]

Got laid off by jerks
Hired another cheap
Drinking on wellfare

[Charlie Bell]

Other muppets' feet
Kicked Miss Piggy to the curb
Got laid off by jerks

Last line of the previous haiku is 1st line of your haiku. I patched it for you :)

Xabulba wrote:

Got laid off by jerks

Hired another cheap
Drinking on wellfare

[TheChozyn]

Drinking on wellfare
A bad way to end a day
Times are a changin'

[Dragonborn3]

Times are a changin'
Barbarians are raging
Gambit is Cajun.

[Cuchulainn]

Gambit is cajun
Born and raised on the bayou
He loves his crawfish

[TheChozyn]

He loves his crawfish
Otherwise known as mudbugs
Jambalaya please!

[Cuchulainn]

Jambalaya, please!
My name's not Jambalaya!
What should I call you?

[TheChozyn]

What should I call you?
Punkin? Honey-Pie? Sugar?
I've got a sweet-tooth

[Charles Scholz]

I've got a sweet tooth.
Chocolate, Carmel, Toffee
Nothing but the best.

[Dragonborn3]

Nothing but the best
and that means good food for all
All you can eat, yay!

[drunken_nomad]

All you can eat yay!
Turnips, crow, elephant tail?
Im outta here man

[TheChozyn]

I'm outta here man
I can not take anymore
Time share seminars

[Cuchulainn]

Time share seminars
By a man from Gallifrey
We're sonically screwed!

[TheChozyn]

We're Sonically screwed!
I want my tater-tots now
Cherry Lime-ade too

For those that don't have them, Sonic is a fast food chain

[Chris Mortika]

Very nice, Chozyn.

Cherry Lime-ade too
Sweet for a dwarf's palate. They
Prefer hard cider.

[Cuchulainn]

Prefer hard cider
Hard drinks make a good weapon
Against the liver

[therealthom]

Against the liver
Beating heart and bellows lungs
Confined by the ribs

Last year Sonic came to town. (North of Boston) I'd had it down south. It wasn't great. So it blew my doors off when the line stretched out the parking lot and down the road for half a mile. For months!

[Cuchulainn]

Confined by the ribs
Buried under barbeque
Smothered in the sauce

[TheChozyn]

Smothered in the sauce
Slow basted by the Bourbon
Spiced to perfection

I personally can't stand sonic's food(as far as fast food goes) I only go for the Cherry Lime-ade

[Chris Mortika]

"Spiced to perfection,"
swallowed the red dragon, as
the tiefling went down.

I had Sonic once. The service was non-too-swift. Who likes damp burgers?

[Charlie Bell]

The tiefling went down,
Followed by the rest of us.
Total Party Kill.

[TheChozyn]

Total Party Kill
As the DM it means "WIN!"
Time for a new game

[Charles Scholz]

Time for a new game
DND is so passe.
Pathfinder anyone?

[Chris Mortika]

Pathfinder, anyone?
3.5 compatable;
Only one great tome.

[Cuchulainn]

Only one great tome
Guarded by three magic words
Don't mispronounce them

[TheChozyn]

Don't mispronounce them
Klatu Verata Necktie
Army of Darkness

[Cuchulainn]

Army of Darkness
A hair band in a spaceship
Attacked by a squid