The Thread Celestial


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Silver Crusade

Angel Fish wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:

So here's the plan. I say we start proselyt... prosle... prosyl...

We go to other threads and hand out pamphlets and tell them why they should convert to our cult. The slaadi seem like good choices, as do the undead, the jacks, and poodles.

I call "not it" on the poodles.

I'm back. And as for hurting the poodles, no. they are morally superior to the slaadi. Anyways, the slaadi or more of a threat (being chaotic, they might forget how great our parties are). Also, we were favorably greeted by the badgers. Just thought you should know.

I'll take the poodles, but first I need a nap. Dimensional travel is exhausting...

We're not hurting anybody, just showing them the way!


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

Threat, us? {blushes} Why thank you. As for the morals thing, I should probably point out that the slaadi, poodles, and Jacks are in a three-way race... to the bottom. And Sebastian has such a huge lead, I'm not sure when we can catch up.

And I'm not much of a threat lately; all it took was one 578 pg. PDF and now posting on the boards is cutting into my PFRPG-reading time.

I'm in the same boat with you. Trying to cross-reference the PRPG and the Beta to find all the changes is taking forever.... ;)


I have the first draft of the pamphlet. Let me know what you think:

REPENT OF YOUR NON-CELESTIAL WAYS OR PERISH IN HELLFIRE!!!

Silver Crusade

Don't forget to mention the cookies. We have delicious cookies.


2nd draft:

REPENT OF YOUR NON-CELESTIAL WAYS OR PERISH IN HELLFIRE!!!
besides, you get cookies if you go Celestial


Celestial Follower wrote:

2nd draft:

REPENT OF YOUR NON-CELESTIAL WAYS OR PERISH IN HELLFIRE!!!
besides, you get cookies if you go Celestial

You forgot the turnips. Or is that what the cookies--I would rather not know. But Lilith will not be pleased for violating the sacred cookie-making process, if I'm right.


Moral Eel wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

2nd draft:

REPENT OF YOUR NON-CELESTIAL WAYS OR PERISH IN HELLFIRE!!!
besides, you get cookies if you go Celestial

You forgot the turnips. Or is that what the cookies--I would rather not know. But Lilith will not be pleased for violating the sacred cookie-making process, if I'm right.

That's because Lilith (despite what the name might connote) is the most Celestial one of us all.


By the way, I found some audio-visual propaganda we can use. The kids like audio-visual stuff these days. It's NSFW, which the kids also seem to like.

Being Celestial is cool, part 1.

Being Celestial is cool, part 2.

Silver Crusade

Moral Eel wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

2nd draft:

REPENT OF YOUR NON-CELESTIAL WAYS OR PERISH IN HELLFIRE!!!
besides, you get cookies if you go Celestial

You forgot the turnips. Or is that what the cookies--I would rather not know. But Lilith will not be pleased for violating the sacred cookie-making process, if I'm right.

I have yet to see any proof that Lilith actually provides cookies to anyone. Until I am actually eating one of her cookies, the Celestial cookie offer stands.

Silver Crusade

Has anybody noticed that you can subscribe to a poster's "recent posts"? In other words, you can get a feed of every post a particular poster makes, if you want to follow what they are doing on the forums.

I would assume that all of you are getting live feeds of every word I utter on these forums, and I would suspect a lot of other people are as well, so for all of you out there...

HEED THE CELESTIALS! TURN AWAY FROM YOUR HEATHEN WAYS AND JOIN US FOR BOARDGAMES AND FINGER FOODS! and turnips...


Celestial Healer wrote:

Has anybody noticed that you can subscribe to a poster's "recent posts"? In other words, you can get a feed of every post a particular poster makes, if you want to follow what they are doing on the forums.

I would assume that all of you are getting live feeds of every word I utter on these forums, and I would suspect a lot of other people are as well, so for all of you out there...

HEED THE CELESTIALS! TURN AWAY FROM YOUR HEATHEN WAYS AND JOIN US FOR BOARDGAMES AND FINGER FOODS! and turnips...

Psst boss--even I've given up on the turnips. Turnips!? What was I thinking?

That subscribing thing makes cyber-stalking Heathansson even easier. Not that I was thinking about that. Really. <Whistles>


I have celestial dinner rolls! Dinner rolls are great with turnips!


Puffy the Dinner Roll wrote:
I have celestial dinner rolls! Dinner rolls are great with turnips!

And butter really brings out the flavor of both! Especially turnips! Yuuuuuumy!

Silver Crusade

Delicious! We will have a dinner party and then we will play charades!


Charades? It has been a long time since I last played that...

Silver Crusade

*acts out climbing a ladder*


Ladder 49! Ladder 49!

<Spits out cheese cube>


You really like my dinner rolls?! Oh thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I need to get back to another thread.


*act out Godzilla on a rampage*

Silver Crusade

Db3's Astral Projection wrote:
*act out Godzilla on a rampage*

What a mess! How are we supposed to recreate our positions on that Risk board now?


Celestial Healer wrote:
Db3's Astral Projection wrote:
*act out Godzilla on a rampage*
What a mess! How are we supposed to recreate our positions on that Risk board now?

<Finishes putting pieces on the board>

Don't worry, boss, I've fixed the board.

If I remember correctly, I've got all of North and South Arcadia.

Silver Crusade

Celestial Follower wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
Db3's Astral Projection wrote:
*act out Godzilla on a rampage*
What a mess! How are we supposed to recreate our positions on that Risk board now?

<Finishes putting pieces on the board>

Don't worry, boss, I've fixed the board.

If I remember correctly, I've got all of North and South Arcadia.

You will never take Gehenna!

Eep, I only have one piece there. Well, then, maybe you will.


Okay, so I control all of Antarctica. See, this way I don't have to fight anybody (while I build my unstoppable empire).


Wait! There's no Antarctica in this game.

<Pulls out rules, points to a wet page.>

See, here are the rules, in crayon! "Antartica can attach any countrie, but it cannt be atacked by another countrie."

Hmm. Well, if it's in the rulebook it must be correct.

Silver Crusade

This game never ends.


When I was a kid, I thought Monopoly was an appropriate name because it took so long to finish a game. Then I learned the difference between "monopoly" and "monotony".


Celestial Follower wrote:

Wait! There's no Antarctica in this game.

<Pulls out rules, points to a wet page.>

See, here are the rules, in crayon! "Antartica can attach any countrie, but it cannt be atacked by another countrie."

Hmm. Well, if it's in the rulebook it must be correct.

See? Told you.

Alright, I'm attacking America.

Silver Crusade

Angel Fish wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

Wait! There's no Antarctica in this game.

<Pulls out rules, points to a wet page.>

See, here are the rules, in crayon! "Antartica can attach any countrie, but it cannt be atacked by another countrie."

Hmm. Well, if it's in the rulebook it must be correct.

See? Told you.

Alright, I'm attacking America.

The my last territory!

Why am I so terrible at board games?


Celestial Healer wrote:
Angel Fish wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

Wait! There's no Antarctica in this game.

<Pulls out rules, points to a wet page.>

See, here are the rules, in crayon! "Antartica can attach any countrie, but it cannt be atacked by another countrie."

Hmm. Well, if it's in the rulebook it must be correct.

See? Told you.

Alright, I'm attacking America.

The my last territory!

Why am I so terrible at board games?

It's just because you don't have an affinity for the rules. As you can see, 'America always loses'. *puts away crayon* Here, I'll leave you Hawaii.

Silver Crusade

How does a fish write with a crayon anyway?


Celestial Healer wrote:
How does a fish write with a crayon anyway?

It's one of the rules changes for the celestial template. I like that one better than the one that prevents our clerics from wearing certain types of armor.

Silver Crusade

Celestial Follower wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
How does a fish write with a crayon anyway?

It's one of the rules changes for the celestial template. I like that one better than the one that prevents our clerics from wearing certain types of armor.

In Pathfinder they can't wear platemail, and in 4e they have no alignment restrictions. What is this world coming to?


Celestial Healer wrote:
How does a fish write with a crayon anyway?

It's a special ability, which allows me to morph my water into a fist which can hold things that are not vulnerable to water. Like, say, a crayon. Why do you ask?


I just want everyone to know that the bug cult is open for memebership, but you need to be a bug avatar, or need a bug name to join.

Come one come all to the hive.

:leaves thread:

Silver Crusade

Lord of All Insects wrote:

I just want everyone to know that the bug cult is open for memebership, but you need to be a bug avatar, or need a bug name to join.

Come one come all to the hive.

:leaves thread:

You're not going to stay for some Risk?

We have appetizers!

I hear insects like sweets. Maybe my follower could rustle up some cotton candy!


<Overhears CH as he's walking out the door>

Here ya go.

<Throws a pallet of cotton candy into the thread>

Enjoy!

Silver Crusade

Celestial Follower wrote:

<Overhears CH as he's walking out the door>

Here ya go.

<Throws a pallet of cotton candy into the thread>

Enjoy!

Where are you going?


I'm going to buy another board game for us to play. Maybe that "Descent" game. That seems appropriate for celestials.

I'm going white-water rafting with my family and a couple of friends, and we're staying at a nearby cabin for the weekend. I doubt I'll have any sort of internet connection.

Silver Crusade

Celestial Follower wrote:

I'm going to buy another board game for us to play. Maybe that "Descent" game. That seems appropriate for celestials.

I'm going white-water rafting with my family and a couple of friends, and we're staying at a nearby cabin for the weekend. I doubt I'll have any sort of internet connection.

Have a good trip! I'm sure this Risk game will still be going when you get back.

Silver Crusade

I hope everyone had a good weekend. How was the trip, taig?


Celestial Healer wrote:
I hope everyone had a good weekend. How was the trip, taig?

It was a lot of fun. We went whitewater rafting on Saturday, and our 7-person raft (including the guide) turned into a 9-person raft because we grabbed two guys that fell out of their raft. Then we went to the Tennessee Aquarium in Chattanooga on Sunday. Then the whole family came down with...something...so we're all feeling pretty yucky today.

It must have been a quiet weekend here. Angel Fish hasn't taken any new territories in the Celestial Risk game.


Celestial Follower wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
I hope everyone had a good weekend. How was the trip, taig?

It was a lot of fun. We went whitewater rafting on Saturday, and our 7-person raft (including the guide) turned into a 9-person raft because we grabbed two guys that fell out of their raft. Then we went to the Tennessee Aquarium in Chattanooga on Sunday. Then the whole family came down with...something...so we're all feeling pretty yucky today.

It must have been a quiet weekend here. Angel Fish hasn't taken any new territories in the Celestial Risk game.

Well, I just got Washington, then I went to bed. However, I now control Wizards of the Coast, Paizo and KQ, so my domination of the world is quite near.

Silver Crusade

YOU WILL NEVER TAKE MADAGASCAR!!!

...

Erm... Didn't mean to be so dramatic.


Celestial Healer wrote:

YOU WILL NEVER TAKE MADAGASCAR!!!

...

Erm... Didn't mean to be so dramatic.

That's because my pet fish already took it. He's threatening swift action against anybody who tries to take it.


Celestial Healer wrote:

YOU WILL NEVER TAKE MADAGASCAR!!!

...

Erm... Didn't mean to be so dramatic.

{whispers:} Pssst, trick him into invading Chicago. Even if he takes it, he'll never hold it... the Bugs will decimate and infiltrate his forces. And trying to nuke them just makes them madder.

Silver Crusade

I'm tired of this game. Maybe we could play the Game of Life instead.

Silver Crusade

Okay... Life.

I hope I get a good career on my first spin.

*spins the spinner*

One.

My space says "slow start, spin again". Yay!

*spins the spinner*

Experimental guinea pig.

DAMMIT!


Celestial Healer wrote:

*spins the spinner*

Experimental guinea pig.

DAMMIT!

Maybe you'll get used for something like THC or Oxycodone testing? Or reproductive habits for GP? Or you'll be the motion capture model for one of the Wonder Pets or G-Force II?

Where is Kobold Cleaver? I hope he hasn't run into trouble or something... he's probably out slaying princesses and rescuing bad guys or something equally heroic.


I thought I had found everything I ever dreamed for in life once I reached the Celestial Sett of the Badgers. Ever since they made the rule that gnomes with less than 11 Charisma gained an extra +2 skill points instead of the usual 0-level spells like speak with animals, I found the courage to believe in myself. No more moping because the other gnomes made fun of me and told me I was no good. I knew that I had found my purpose in life...

I would become the best plumber I could be!

But now that I've arrived, I don't know if they like me. Maybe they think I'm no good. Have I really found my place in life? Will this game tell me?

EDIT: If only an alias could have an alias, then I could make a badger alias so maybe the badgers would like me better. Am I even a celestial? Oh, woe is me!

Hey, do you guys need any plumbing here?

Silver Crusade

Drip Do'Urden wrote:


Hey, do you guys need any plumbing here?

Can you change Angel Fish's filter?

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