Yeah man, I'm so sorry to hear that. Good luck.
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Well, look who beat the odds! Despite the extreme rarity, the results of my biopsy say I have thyroid cancer. Things are going to move fast now; oncology consult tomorrow, PET scan and chest x-ray later this week. Pretty much a definite they will remove my entire thyroid because of the size of the second tumor (to quote Shatner, “It’s big. Really big.”) and the possibility it has spread, followed by an irradiated iodine cocktail, and pills for the rest of my life to replace the missing hormone generator. Sucks, but what-ev. I hope that it hasn’t leaked, but the tests will tell for sure. Good news is there is only like a 1% chance I won’t be able to talk again after the surgery, and the doctor seems willing to crank my dosage enough to return me to my “normal” state of hyperthyroidism (which is normal to me).
When you wrote that the doctors wanted to have a sitdown with you, I knew. Sorry man. Hopefully they can get it all and you can avoid the nasty stuff associated with cancer.
Stay strong brother. Make sure they give you the right hormone too, don't wanna end up with boobies or anything....although you do have the build for it....;P
Good luck, Mike. You'll be fine.
My thoughts are with you, Mike. One of my employees had their thyroid gland removed twenty years ago. I think she takes hormone replacement medication daily. If ONLY she'd lose the ability to talk. Yadda yadda yadda.
Y'know, I was going to complain about the price of hardback books, but... cancer? You just won the thread. It's over, go home, you can't beat "I have cancer" for things in life that suck.
My thoughts and prayers will go out to you Mike. Please get better, because if you don't, then we would have to animate you as a zombie and I doubt you would like that.
It depends, would I be a fast zombie or a slow zombie?
Thanks for the support, everyone, I really appreciate it. Harder on my wife than anything else, and I finally told my extended family, who are now officially bugging the crap out of me about it (which is why I waited). Oh well, got to get done what needs to get done so I can live to see my son grow up, and with any luck the PET scan will show it is all contained and not hiding in my lungs or some crap. I’m pushing pretty hard to keep half my thyroid, even AMA, because honestly, I’m all about the manic, I’m not sure I’d even know how to live life “normal.” Guess we’ll find out.
Don’t want to corner the market on the sucktastic thread, so I’ll drop a comment on hardcover books as well. I don’t care for them. Not a big fan of the dust jacket, they are expensive, and they just aren’t portable. Not only that, but that crazy Amazon Kindle thing charges MORE for pretend hardcovers than pretend soft covers (yeah yeah, new releases, but cripes).
don't wanna end up with boobies or anything....although you do have the build for it....;P
Oh please, I would never have to leave the house again! I mean, no, that’d be weird… Speaking of build, that’s why I’m not allowed to break the law. I’ve been told on more than one occasion I’m “pretty,” and I get hit on regularly by gay men (which is kind of nice really, even if I’m not gay, it’s a nice affirmation that my looks aren’t going).
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And speaking of friggin' weird tumor-y things...
A few friends and I were hanging out yesterday, when completely out of the motherf**+ing blue, my friend Katie dropped like a sack of potatoes, and began to scream in agony. We didn't have a f%++ing clue what was going on, but we did have some ...expertise (Myself and my buddy Alex are Eagle Scouts, and my friend Jamie is an EMT).
Now begins the worse part. We called the ambulance. It didn't show up for forty minutes. The dispatch station is a mile away from where we were. Let me repeat that, so it's clear:
After standing in the freezing cold for forty minutes, I was the angriest I have been in nearly a decade. I don't know what they had been doing. Jacking off? Watching NASCAR? I DON'T KNOW. When they showed up, I nearly throttled the driver. I held back, though, becasuse I am one hell of a nice guy. M%%%@~$*&~~!s.
However, Katie was pretty lucid through the whole thing. Between gasps of pain, as they loaded her into the ambulance, she remarked to the assembled people "Stop looking at me like I'm already dead."
Anyway, it turned out that she had had a massive ovarian cyst, and it had burst, releasing some sort of toxin into her system. She's mostly fine now, but at the time, it was scary as f@*+.
As someone that (at least for part of the year) has to deal with stupid people that go to the hospital due to accidents, it was quite unnerving to be there when something that I couldn't have stopped was going on.
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The whole of industrial civilization is due to fall down in burning wreckage over the next few decades. Overall, everyone is prancing along ignoring the problems that are looming. We oughta be trying to get into orbit, onto the moon, out to the belts, and beyond. We should be trying to spread life across the cosmos. Instead we've got people looking for excuses to get angry at other people, religions declaring holy war on anyone who doesn't follow their exact belief, and J Random concluding that another beer is what he needs to handle the stresses he faces. Corporations are following short-term profit instead of trying for the long term, and everyone seems to follow along, pretending that they only need to think as far ahead as next week. All kinds of nightmare disasters are waiting to happen; we're overdue for the next major California Quake, we're due for another massive impact from a NEO, if the ice caps melt completely we may end up trying to breathe in an atmosphere that's saturated with methane, if we suddenly go clean-energy tomorrow we may have an ice age a week later. The oil peak is either already here or not far off, and the coal supply's pretty close behind it. Nuclear power is a joke, hydrogen is a farce, and nothing we've found can supply the power this civilization really needs. But, instead of trying to solve any of this, the people theoretically in charge are bickering over land rights to the remaining big oil fields, fluffing their feathers at their rivals for power, and living like the world is never gonna change. And so it goes, all the way down, and honestly I can't really see how in the burning pits of the nine hells the human race can escape this one the way we're currently going.
Which, with the other things people have posted, makes me begin to understand why a lot of the more empathic geniuses end up killing themselves in some way or another, be it literal suicide or drinking and drug abuse.
Well, look who beat the odds! Despite the extreme rarity, the results of my biopsy say I have thyroid cancer. Things are going to move fast now; oncology consult tomorrow, PET scan and chest x-ray later this week. Pretty much a definite they will remove my entire thyroid because of the size of the second tumor (to quote Shatner, “It’s big. Really big.”) and the possibility it has spread, followed by an irradiated iodine cocktail, and pills for the rest of my life to replace the missing hormone generator. Sucks, but what-ev. I hope that it hasn’t leaked, but the tests will tell for sure. Good news is there is only like a 1% chance I won’t be able to talk again after the surgery, and the doctor seems willing to crank my dosage enough to return me to my “normal” state of hyperthyroidism (which is normal to me).
I echo the sentiments already posted. I really hope things turn out alright for you man. Good luck.
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The whole of industrial civilization is due to fall down in burning wreckage over the next few decades. Overall, everyone is prancing along ignoring the problems that are looming. We oughta be trying to get into orbit, onto the moon, out to the belts, and beyond. We should be trying to spread life across the cosmos. Instead we've got people looking for excuses to get angry at other people, religions declaring holy war on anyone who doesn't follow their exact belief, and J Random concluding that another beer is what he needs to handle the stresses he faces. Corporations are following short-term profit instead of trying for the long term, and everyone seems to follow along, pretending that they only need to think as far ahead as next week. All kinds of nightmare disasters are waiting to happen; we're overdue for the next major California Quake, we're due for another massive impact from a NEO, if the ice caps melt completely we may end up trying to breathe in an atmosphere that's saturated with methane, if we suddenly go clean-energy tomorrow we may have an ice age a week later. The oil peak is either already here or not far off, and the coal supply's pretty close behind it. Nuclear power is a joke, hydrogen is a farce, and nothing we've found can supply the power this civilization really needs. But, instead of trying to solve any of this, the people theoretically in charge are bickering over land rights to the remaining big oil fields, fluffing their feathers at their rivals for power, and living like the world is never gonna change. And so it goes, all the way down, and honestly I can't really see how in the burning pits of the nine hells the human race can escape this one the way we're currently going.
Which, with the other things people have posted, makes me begin to understand why a lot of the more empathic geniuses end up killing themselves in some way or another, be it literal suicide or drinking and drug abuse.
Bummer.
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RPG Superstar 2009 Top 8
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The whole of industrial civilization is due to fall down in burning wreckage over the next few decades. Overall, everyone is prancing along ignoring the problems that are looming. We oughta be trying to get into orbit, onto the moon, out to the belts, and beyond. We should be trying to spread life across the cosmos. Instead we've got people looking for excuses to get angry at other people, religions declaring holy war on anyone who doesn't follow their exact belief, and J Random concluding that another beer is what he needs to handle the stresses he faces. Corporations are following short-term profit instead of trying for the long term, and everyone seems to follow along, pretending that they only need to think as far ahead as next week. All kinds of nightmare disasters are waiting to happen; we're overdue for the next major California Quake, we're due for another massive impact from a NEO, if the ice caps melt completely we may end up trying to breathe in an atmosphere that's saturated with methane, if we suddenly go clean-energy tomorrow we may have an ice age a week later. The oil peak is either already here or not far off, and the coal supply's pretty close behind it. Nuclear power is a joke, hydrogen is a farce, and nothing we've found can supply the power this civilization really needs. But, instead of trying to solve any of this, the people theoretically in charge are bickering over land rights to the remaining big oil fields, fluffing their feathers at their rivals for power, and living like the world is never gonna change. And so it goes, all the way down, and honestly I can't really see how in the burning pits of the nine hells the human race can escape this one the way we're currently going.
Which, with the other things people have posted, makes me begin to understand why a lot of the more empathic geniuses end up killing themselves in some way or another, be it literal suicide or drinking and drug abuse.
This is about 4e, right?
;-)
Honestly, I’ve suffered from similar frustrations, and finally come to decide it comes from over thinking the problem. Want could I, as a regular person who gets up, goes to work, gets to spend precious little time with his family, then goes to sleep only to start all over again, do to change the world? Fix society's problems? Show world leaders they are being idiots? Seems worthless to try, where would you even start?
Say, "I’m sorry" more, and mean it. Turn off the faucet while you brush. Give up your seat if someone needs to sit down. Get to know someone of a different culture, and try to see things from their point of view.
Set an example by doing simple, stupid, everyday crap. A drop of rain never changed anything, but 6 billion drops of rain certainly get attention.
I suck; yep; hard to admit; but I am supposed to send stuff to peeps like EileenOprophetus and some others, but when I get home my mind is wiped and i forget all about it until I get back to work and check the boards; man, I suck; my appologies to all I am supposed to send things like emails; links; info, pictures and whatnot; sigh, I suck
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Honestly, I’ve suffered from similar frustrations, and finally come to decide it comes from over thinking the problem. Want could I, as a regular person who gets up, goes to work, gets to spend precious little time with his family, then goes to sleep only to start all over again, do to change the world? Fix society's problems? Show world leaders they are being idiots? Seems worthless to try, where would you even start?
Say, "I’m sorry" more, and mean it. Turn off the faucet while you brush. Give up your seat if someone needs to sit down. Get to know someone of a different culture, and try to see things from their point of view.
Set an example by doing simple, stupid, everyday crap. A drop of rain never changed anything, but 6 billion drops of rain certainly get attention.
I totally agree, but wanted to add, Vote for the stuff that effects the longterm. Doing little stuff consistantly can add up. If a proposed law comes up that seems to be well thought out and helps the world in general and not some random corporation, express an opinion.
My wife theorizes that we are all put on earth by god for purposes. Those purposes could be something as small as smiling at a stranger having a bad day and lifting their spirit, educating your children to become responsible adults, or displaying random acts of kindness. They also could be big stuff like helping develope a cure for cancer, helping to police your city, or giving aid to people in crisis.The smile you give could help someone through a hard day with a clearer mind to help them to achieve a big result.
Never discount the little things because you can't seem to get the big things done.
Honestly, I’ve suffered from similar frustrations, and finally come to decide it comes from over thinking the problem. Want could I, as a regular person who gets up, goes to work, gets to spend precious little time with his family, then goes to sleep only to start all over again, do to change the world? Fix society's problems? Show world leaders they are being idiots? Seems worthless to try, where would you even start?
Say, "I’m sorry" more, and mean it. Turn off the faucet while you brush. Give up your seat if someone needs to sit down. Get to know someone of a different culture, and try to see things from their point of view.
Set an example by doing simple, stupid, everyday crap. A drop of rain never changed anything, but 6 billion drops of rain certainly get attention.
I've been chewing on this same thing over the past week. So worried about the huge issues where there are 500 people pushing in the opposite direction as me, or with how I am going come up with some Ralph Kramden scheme to get my girlfriend and I into "the good life," that, on a day to day basis, I'm not much use to anyone or myself. Plus building an ulcer.
A couple of days ago, I kind of dropped a lot of the superhero fantasies in my head and started reconnecting with life. Still kind of scared of people, but working up to it.
Good luck with your treatment. I really really hope it works out ok.
Wow. Good luck.
And your advise rings true. I'm here in China so I CAN spend all my time with my daughter. My teaching hours are.... enviable.
blech; my love life is so up and down it sucks hynnie and it is always about my kids; sheesh, what is up with that.
blech; my love life is so up and down it sucks hynnie and it is always about my kids; sheesh, what is up with that.
2 points:
1) At least you have a love life.2) As long as kids are involved with one or both partners, it's ALWAYS about the kids. Can't take them out of the equation (put them aside for a weekend or so, yes, but not entirely).
well; not having a love life sucks and having too much of one sucks too; meaning the girl who told me last night a lot of ahem; very nice and provocative things was not my girlfriend. It sucks bad that girls are so problematic and stuff, but I think it sucks worse to not have one; I can only play so many warhammer games and hear the same rpg stories over and over; thank God for video games :) Murphey's Law i guess; when you dont have a girl it can be hard to find one; when you have one; others come out of the woodwork and throw themselves at you; wierd; though I hear in ABQ there is 6-1 girls over guy ratio. Dating and starting relationships suck; being in a nice, stable relationship is awesome.
~sighs and then grins~ Yea. Not having a relationship sucks, but so does having a bad relationship. ~sighs~ Hopefully I can find someone who can tollerate me.
A%$*#*&s next door with a karaoke machine singing into the night. Off-key and reverberating throughout the building.
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~sighs and then grins~ Yea. Not having a relationship sucks, but so does having a bad relationship. ~sighs~ Hopefully I can find someone who can tollerate me.I think Heathy has a sister that is JUST like him, you 2 would get along famously.
;P
You just need a good bang buddy.
Nobody does my sister!!!
a%&%&!%s next door with a karaoke machine singing into the night. Off-key and reverberating throughout the building.
Kill! Let no Karaoke machine survive your holy purge!
~sighs and then grins~ Yea. Not having a relationship sucks, but so does having a bad relationship. ~sighs~ Hopefully I can find someone who can tollerate me.I think Heathy has a sister that is JUST like him, you 2 would get along famously.
;P
You just need a good bang buddy.
NOOOO!!!!! Not a female Heathy! ~runs away in terror~
~grins~ You just might be right about the latter part, Fakey.
~sighs~ Things that suck. I make a GREAT platonic friend to women. Ask my several female friends. But once it gets past the frienship end and I start to have problems! ~grimace~ Insecurity and cowardice ftw! ~grumbles and heads off to bang my head against the wall over my person failings~
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~sighs~ Things that suck. I make a GREAT platonic friend to women. Ask my several female friends. But once it gets past the frienship end and I start to have problems! ~grimace~ Insecurity and cowardice ftw! ~grumbles and heads off to bang my head against the wall over my person failings~
Women love me because I'm 'kooky' and 'wacky'. They assume that once I enter a relationship with them, I'll stop, because it's obviously all an act.
WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!!
NOTHING COULD BE FARTHER FROM THE TRUTH!
The reason I act all strange is that I'm really, honestly f$!*ed-up inside my rather large cranium. I have problems. Mental. Psychological. And plus, I'm just weird. Seriously.
My best guess is that a lot of women are used to meeting guys that put up a nice poster to attract other female humons, then take it down and act all normal-like.
I don't got no steenkin' poster. What you see is what you get.
I don't got no steenkin' poster. What you see is what you get.
“Stolen beer tastes better!” – Mr. Wrong.
To yourself be true.
I misquoted it, but got the basics true. I have had several friends tell me to tone it down, but then I would not be me. ~shrugs~ Whatever.
Wayfinder, PaizoCon Founder
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Murphey's Law i guess; when you dont have a girl it can be hard to find one; when you have one; others come out of the woodwork and throw themselves at you; wierd;
Actually, it's probably the fact that once you are IN a relationship, you are more comfortable with yourself, have more self-confidence, and generally become less concerned with trying to impress...i.e., you just act like yourself. Women find THAT attractive, that you're totally at ease and comfortable being you.
This whole thing took me by surprise, too. Met my wife when I was in one of those phases....:D
a%&%&!%s next door with a karaoke machine singing into the night. Off-key and reverberating throughout the building.Kill! Let no Karaoke machine survive your holy purge!
Kruelaid stands on top of his building (that's in China, BTW), looking out over the city below shrouded in early morning coal smoke. Karaoke machines fill the little houses and stretch as far as the eye can see, and Kruelaid has just one baseball bat (Dammit, I can't seem to buy a hockey stick here).
Kruelaid stands on top of his building (that's in China, BTW), looking out over the city below shrouded in early morning coal smoke. Karaoke machines fill the little houses and stretch as far as the eye can see, and Kruelaid has just one baseball bat (Dammit, I can't seem to buy a hockey stick here).a%&%&!%s next door with a karaoke machine singing into the night. Off-key and reverberating throughout the building.Kill! Let no Karaoke machine survive your holy purge!
~smiles~ If you want we can try to ship you a hockey stick and a goaley mask.
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Wound up taking a fall today. While I caught myself and did a great roll to get back to my feet, I appear to've done something nto my elbow, because it hurts like hell and is swelling. I don't *think* I dislocated it, probably just bruised/sprained it, but FFS, when you're lugging a laptop and such around it's an 'ow, dammit' situation.
My job requires a five hour commute, round trip every day. Which means I can't do what I really want to do at any time during the work week. No making drawings, no doing anything of real value. Just get up, drive, train, subway, work, subway, train, drive, dinner, shower, sleep. Plus, it may not be a permanent position (and working somewhere for a month or so doesn't help your resume much, kind of raises more questions than it answers), plus whenever there's bad weather I have to run around like a chicken with my head cut off for fear of missing work, when I don't even want to be there in the first place. Also: I've been there about a month now and I have yet to see a dollar. They're not in a rush to pay the freelancer. Until I get both of the paychecks I am owed, this job is costing me money as well as time, both of which are valuable to me.
If this were anywhere closer to me, within feasible driving distance, I would have no problem going in every now and then and not having something to do. People stare at me when I complain that sometimes they don't have something to keep me busy. "You're getting payed to goof around for that time." But I can goof around on my own time. If I get up at 5:30 to be here, I had better be doing at least something, even if it's entry-level s!&*. I can read at home, I can stare out the window at home. If I'm being payed, I want to work.
I also hate that stupid thing that I've done with my friends, you've done with yours, everyone does it: when you have nothing else to talk about, you sit around and complain about work. And, obviously, I'm guilty of that. But that's not my problem. It's making it a competition of who has it worse. F**% that. I don't really care. If I think it sucks for me, being told that it doesn't suck for me because in your opinion you have it worse doesn't make me think any differently. I'll be sympathetic while you plead your case, even if I don't say anything. But it's a lot more pathetic if you have to be King Misery rather than just another guy with stuff he isn't happy with. It's dumb and I'm sick of it.
There's a lot of talk about lady stuff in some of our off-topic male bonding and I find it cathartic to know that I do not suffer alone. To know that though I stand on the icey line, the frozen dawn gazing into the future like Rodney James Dio before me, I do not stand alone.
Some businesses deliberately play the “How much can you take?” game. It sucks to watch someone else go through it, because I’ve been there. The working for free part is the biggest kick in the nuts element of it, “Oh, did you need that paycheck?”
Busted my arse at several contract jobs hoping to be picked up as a full employee (and boy do they string you) only to be let go at the end of my contracts (which is fair and expected, honestly). The real kicker is, five times now those same companies have called me (sometimes repeatedly) to come back and work for them once I’m established at a new place. Didn’t know how good they had it, apparently.
Luckily, the place I have now treats me with dignity even if they don’t always listen, and I get to wear jeans, which is probably worth about 10 grand a year to me as a bonus.
Stick it out, keep going out of spite. If you’re out of crap to do, start offering to gopher food and wash cars. You’ll get to go outside, and maybe it will be an in as one of the management’s minions. ;)
I can put up with it and some days, even enjoy it; there's just a lot that annoys me in light of how much effort it takes to get there every day. The people I directly work with are respectful, nice folks. It's just the people I never meet that do all the accounting that took their time with cutting me my cheques.
Someone in my family has it much worse with her new job. She can't even check her email on her lunch break, since her boss is always walking around, looking at everyone's screen. They had her go without breaks and told her she had to stay a few hours extra. She told them no, she's not doing that because she has a dog at home that needs to be walked (which wasn't a necessary addendum; she had already worked more than a full work day and those jerks didn't need to hear a reason) so the guy screamed at her and told her she would have to march up to the meeting or whatever with the higher ups and tell them why she wasn't going to stay. She said she wasn't doing that and left. Rotten. I offered to go in and cause a ruckus for her (turning over filing cabinets, desks and stacks of paper; things like that) but no response so far.
getting two timed or more; sucks when you think your getting close and all exclusive and growing together.
My five year old told me that I'm the only one who doesn't laugh at him when he says he wants to be a Knight when he grows up :(
I think that is so sad. Let them have their dreams now; life will do a reality smack soon enough.
Director of Narrative
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My five year old told me that I'm the only one who doesn't laugh at him when he says he wants to be a Knight when he grows up :(
I think that is so sad. Let them have their dreams now; life will do a reality smack soon enough.
I'm glad you're there to guide him properly into this weird world. Burn that imagination bright!
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I can put up with it and some days, even enjoy it; there's just a lot that annoys me in light of how much effort it takes to get there every day. The people I directly work with are respectful, nice folks. It's just the people I never meet that do all the accounting that took their time with cutting me my cheques.
Someone in my family has it much worse with her new job. She can't even check her email on her lunch break, since her boss is always walking around, looking at everyone's screen. They had her go without breaks and told her she had to stay a few hours extra. She told them no, she's not doing that because she has a dog at home that needs to be walked (which wasn't a necessary addendum; she had already worked more than a full work day and those jerks didn't need to hear a reason) so the guy screamed at her and told her she would have to march up to the meeting or whatever with the higher ups and tell them why she wasn't going to stay. She said she wasn't doing that and left. Rotten. I offered to go in and cause a ruckus for her (turning over filing cabinets, desks and stacks of paper; things like that) but no response so far.
Their actions sound illegal to me, though that is from a UK perspective. And turning over their filing cabinets is also probably illegal - you don't want the SWAT team on you. ;-)
My five year old told me that I'm the only one who doesn't laugh at him when he says he wants to be a Knight when he grows up :(
I think that is so sad. Let them have their dreams now; life will do a reality smack soon enough.I'm glad you're there to guide him properly into this weird world. Burn that imagination bright!
** spoiler omitted **
He's still deciding between a Knight or an Astronaut-Wizard. Or the guy on the side of the road with the bag and the pointy stick that picks up trash.
Yeah, dig. She put in her notice yesterday and she's a lot happier. And breaking the law in New York City is a lot different from doing it in the suburbs; more crackheads in the cells with you. So I wound up not causing a ruckus.