Wizard of Chaos's page

I'm too nekkid for my body...

Chaos! Chaos everywhere!

I'm bloated!

Depends on what you're waxing

Do these posts make me look fat?

Emperor7 wrote:

Orthos wrote:

Emperor7 wrote:

The Emperor has new clothes!

*snerk* Well played. Pardon while I clean my monitor.

You may want some brain bleach too. :D

I'm one of those people who pictures posters as their avatars. So nothing too mind-scarring from the tree ;)

I'm nekkid too!

I need a cigarette after that blitz

Does this boil on my skull make my butt look fat?

I took my trash to the dump today

What a coincidence. I took a dump in the trash today.

[Jared]I want my Subway with extra elves. I need more green stuff in my diet![/Jared]

Mmmmm...worms.

The worms go in, the worms go out, the worms play pinochle on your snout.

Ah'll take a slice of that chocolate cake m'self!

Rowr!

Our chillun's be super strong and have the Abberant bloodline! Win win!

Wouldn't mind a little Freeholdin' myself...

C'mere, you cute little B+ honey

Lucky Troll feet for sale, $10 dollars. (Just keep them out of sunlight.)

[Admiral Ackbar]It's a trap![/Admiral Ackbar]

They regenerate!

I'm right. You suck. Unless you happen to agree that I'm right. Then you're awesome and intelligent.

This has been a paid announcement from the people stuck in houses on rainy mornings.

I got up early this morning to do yard work, only to find the ground covered with snow. Snow? Huh? More is coming down in big, hairy flakes. It's gorgeous.

Why, thank you. I work hard to keep my big, hairy flakes looking good so when they fall to the ground they glisten. It's nice to be appreciated. ;P

I like cheese!

Did someone order the troll a-la mode? It looks divine.

Crimson Jester wrote:

no clones allowed.

blows maritime whistle Cleanup on aisle FAWLTY!

Did I do that?

Crimson Jester wrote:

no clones allowed.

blows maritime whistle Cleanup on aisle FAWLTY!

Did I do that?

Aberzombie wrote:

sniff

Monkey doesn't say hi to me....

HI AZ! I am always afraid to say hi to you, in case you are hungry ...

Protects small cranium with styrofoam helmet

...but doesn't the styrofoam just keep the brain fresher?

Mmmmm...monkey brainsss....

Imma little tea pot short and stout

here is my handle
here is my...
here is my...
here is my handle
oh no
Imma sugar bowl.

Hey, Sweety. Come 'ere.

Mmmm....juicy brains....

Smurf?

Hows 'bout a little kiss?

Smurf?

Where's the chaos?

Or, I could just stand near the wall and watch you eat your bon bons.

Wizard of Chaos wrote:

Was that a bottle of Claret your boss gave you? That, some fava beans, and a couple fresh kidneys and we'll have a feast.

Nope, just a white zin. :)

Hmmm...thigh meat then. And finger sandwiches.

Was that a bottle of Claret your boss gave you? That, some fava beans, and a couple fresh kidneys and we'll have a feast.

So, Clarice...err...I mean Solnes,

It's just the two of us. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Okay, people, I'm up. Got a lot on the menu this morning, but first: coffee!

So how are the denizens of FAWTLy towers this morning?

Feeling the mucus. ;) And you? Is your lettuce 'crisp'?

Emperor7 wrote:

taig wrote:

I guess I haven't had enough Kool-Aid.

Idea for Libertarian commercial spots -

This is your brain. This is your brain on Kool-Aid. Get the picture?

THINK. It's the new rage.

MONEY. It comes out of someone's pocket.

BOOBS. The 5th food group.

Just checking to see if anyone was reading. ;)

Thanks alot man. Now I'm hungry again..... ;D

Hungry for....luv?

TATER TOT GOOD, Political/Religious thread BAD.

See I told you they would save the world. Good always trumps bad!! ;D

Mmmm...tater tots. Homemade, with real tots. Mmmmm...crunchy, as you eat their little bones...

nom nom nom

Hannibal Lecter wrote:

Solnes wrote:

Jack Hammer wrote:

Solnes wrote:

Jack Hammer wrote:

Solnes wrote:

Methinks that I may have sared off everyone with my stalker side. :)

Not possible, Mistress Celery.

Uhm...no.

Celery or stalk, or celery stalks?

Just ..no. :)

Good evening, Solnes.

Aww man, not before I sleep! Now I'll have weird dreams. :)

Nighty night, Solnes.

Wizard of Chaos wrote:

Aberzombie wrote:

That's what I've got left over Halloween candy for.

Hello, little zombie.

Would you like some candy?

Sure!

Candied eyeballs for the zombies and finger licking good fingers for the lich. You can trade with each other if you like.

That's what I've got left over Halloween candy for.

Hello, little zombie.

Would you like some candy?

Emperor7 wrote:

Frank the Mime wrote:

.....!!!

Doesn't ToP usually require something be said? Heck, a still mime is like a shark that doesn't swim and suffocate.

A mime is a terrible thing to waste. Or is it a mime is a terrible waste, I always get them confused.

A mime is a terrible thing to baste.

Phlegm with chunks...mmmm....

Mmmm...phlegm...

*runs nekkid thru the thread*

Ice Spleen! Ice Spleen! We all scream for Ice Spleen!

No dear, that would be eyes spleen, eyes spleen.

Brains a la mode?

Vomit Guy wrote:

GUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRG!

Rats! Wisdom is always in some foreign tongue. Maybe we can get Puddle to translate it?

You need only to let the vomit dry at the bottom of your teacup. Bask in the fumes while it does. Then you shall understand.

Yay! This one's still chunky!

*waits excitedly with bucket, to capture said wisdom*

Wizard of Chaos wrote:

Tossed Slaad wrote:

Wizard of Chaos wrote:

I'm not a slaad but can I play here?

Can we egg you?

Sure. Boils and eggs. Hard-boiled eggs. It's all good.

Allow me to clarify.

By "egg," I mean that I would forcefully implant my demon seed in your torso where it would grow and gain strength like a parasite before erupting from your soon-to-be-lifeless corpse in a spray of blood and gore and feeding on your entrails.

I hope you're still cool with that, though.

Like you're the 1st slaad to use that line on me.

Sure, why not?

Wizard of Chaos wrote:

I'm not a slaad but can I play here?

Can we egg you?

Sure. Boils and eggs. Hard-boiled eggs. It's all good.

I'm not a slaad but can I play here?

You know, Gary is my second cousin twice removed on my mother's side. He's also my uncle. And my nephew.

It's complicated.

Go Gary!

Not to weird anyone out... but there could be a spider INSIDE of your monitor.

True story.

About a month ago, I was watching TV. My TV is pretty big at about 50" widescreen or thereabouts, and as I was watching it from across the room seated comfortably on the couch, I noticed something strange.

There was a weird black splotch on the screen up along the upper edge, about in the middle.

At first, I thought a big chunk of dust or something had gotten lodged at the edge of the screen. Then I became worried that a fingernail sized chunk of pixels had died. That possibility made me sad.

And then, suddenly, the black splotch moved. And I could see individual legs wriggling. From across the room.

I got up to investigate, and Lo! there was a spider IN MY TELEVISION!!!! It had gotten inside somehow and had crawled up between the picture tube and the glass/plastic/whatever covering in front of the picture tube, wedged its body up there, and its legs and half its body was hanging down over the screen. I tapped the top of the TV just above my visitor and it moved. I tapped again and it moved again. Eventually I got the spider to climb OFF of the screen and into the TV's internal workings. It's probably still in there, for all I know. I'm okay with that, though, since he's no longer in the way of my entertainment.

But he's still in there. And he probably has friends.

Checks spider drone currently monitoring the Jacobs' residence. Signal strong. Much data on file.