The Man of 1,000 Stitches

R. S. Powerhouse's page

99 posts. Alias of Mairkurion {tm}.


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Aberzombie wrote:
Once I order the penguins to do the linguine, the entire park will be filtering at my bodaciousness.

Pengoowinz is practically chickens...


Twin Agate Dragons wrote:


I was a wake at the time. Had I been asleep, it would've been a hell of a lot worse; our furniture could have gotten ruined. The pipe that connects the plumbing to the toilet popped off and started the flooding.

Are you sure everything in here is up to code?

::Taps walls::

::Taps pipes::

::Roots around in refrigerator::


Jack Hammer wrote:
R. S. Powerhouse wrote:

While construction slowed and droned on in the background for months, there is a sudden swelling of noise and activity.

Hey M-, I mean, Jacks, we're almost done with the remodeling and expansion project. Any last minute requests before we're all done?

If you remembered the chillers to keep the porcelain nice and cool in the bathroom Frat should be all set.

And the Arms locker. It never hurts to have spares.

I really like the buffing wheels you attached to the barco loungers.

Frat's got a frosty toilet. Besides the main bunker, there are strategically placed auxiliary lockers all over the house accessed by Jackscanners.


While construction slowed and droned on in the background for months, there is a sudden swelling of noise and activity.

Hey M-, I mean, Jacks, we're almost done with the remodeling and expansion project. Any last minute requests before we're all done?


*Swings wrecking ball into thread.*


Drives crane into the thread with a wrecking ball attached, as theme song plays.


I hates ta see a chicken cry so much...{smack, smack, smack} dat I hasta putem outta dare misery...


Constructive post


As Hungry Jack settles back into his renovated and expanded kitchen and the general inspects the sacrificial altar, work continues apace in other parts of the estate. It appears that a heliopad may be in store for the top of one of the towers.


Mairkurion {tm} wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
R. S. Powerhouse wrote:
The chaos balls fizzle whenever they strike the axiomatic fields that are revealed to protect all construction zones. The money spent on the project wizard was well spent. The finishing coat of paint is being put on a large skunk guard house placed under the shade of a plane tree out on the front lawn.

Not to second guess Panama but a couple of stone guardians at the entry to the CJ monument woulda been cool. You know, like a JackSphinx? linky

I'll pay for the change order if it works with the design intent.

Unrolls plans.

Well, dere's a blank area here on da lawn about a third of da way up da main drive, marked "future development?". If we can get da wizard on da horn, we might be able ta make sumthin happen.

HAHA. Yeah, you Jacks and your gags. Here, take your leaf mask and let me get back to work.


The chaos balls fizzle whenever they strike the axiomatic fields that are revealed to protect all construction zones. The money spent on the project wizard was well spent. The finishing coat of paint is being put on a large skunk guard house placed under the shade of a plane tree out on the front lawn.


JH notices that the dust continues to spread, out-pacing even the most concentrated efforts of the peasants.

Thanks for the help, Mac- er, Jack, but I got to keep up regulations no matter what. But I hear you wit dese peasants. In Brooklyn, da whining little things wouldn't even last a day.


Hungry Jack wrote:

Hungry Jack® swears this place used to be where the Jacks would hang out. Oh well...

Begins packing up his kitchen.

All right, fellas, since da head cook here seems to have vacated da premises for da time being, now's a good time for da kitchen remodeling and extension project to begin. If we hustle, maybe wes can get it done before he retoins.

Crews being entering the kitchen area, and the dust starts flying with a vengeance. Cue now familiar theme music...


Malice Jack wrote:

Awright we gots a party!

Fires up the turntables and belts out some techno

The lights dim with the extra pull on the generators.


The deafening roar of generators starting at various points on the grounds grows.

Sorry Jacks. We've got to take the house off of the grid at this stage of the project. We hope to have regular power back up in a day or so. In the mean time, the house will be powered by generators.


Construction continues through the weekend. By now, it is clear that a tower sporting a massive array of lightening rods is being added to the House o' Jacks.


Zombie Guy wrote:
BRAINS!!!

Getouttaheah, Mac! We've got some serious work left to do.

Smacks Zombie Guy with giant mallet, driving him into the ground as a massive stone pillar is lowered onto the spot by a crane.


In the background the constant chipping of the the stone workers is heard. A great stone visage of Callous Jack begins to take shape from a great marble block placed on a hillock near the main entry.


After a day of riveting and welding of the building frame, and unloading of the stone, the stonemasons begin supervising the placing of the stones.


The sun glints off of the frame of beams and girders that have been raised off the side of the estate where Panama Jack's rooms are. Most of the underground excavation seems to have been covered over by the constant stream of concrete being poured the day before and through the night. The displaced earth is being moved about the property as part of the new landscaping. Out by the front entrance, stonemasons are supervising the unloading of truck after truck of massive stone.


All through the night, the sound of construction continues, unabated.

The Jack complex continues to grow.


The sound of cranes lifting girders up on the beams and of riveting and welding fill the night air.


The sounds of beams being driven deep into the ground and set in concrete.


Construction continues unremittingly in the background.


The churning sounds of concrete mixers pouring enormous amounts of concrete into molds and frames on the side of the house echoes across the estate, as a queue of cement trucks wind around the property and as far down the street as the eyes can see.


Keep it up, fellas.

We gotta get this work done before the deliveries start.


Jack Hammer wrote:
R. S. Powerhouse wrote:
Can't fall behind!
Sorry if this throws you off schedule a bit. Want a beer?

Fuhgetaboutit. Staying on schedule in what we do! No beer until the job is done!


Can't fall behind!


dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum


weld


beep beep beep

{SQUISH}

Whoops! Sorry bout that Mr. Connery. Better keep an eye out, you've entered a construction zone.


drill


rivet


rivet


rivet


rivet


pour


churn


dig


saw


grind


We could use all that cheap labor here!

(And posters...)


The sounds of rocks splitting and earth churning mix with the mechanical sounds of the engines powering a great excavation on the far side of the estate.


Various trenchers, power diggers, steam shovels, caterpillars, and other earth movers rumble past the pool, on their way to the far side of the Jack manor.


Jack Hammer wrote:
Out of respect for the complexity of the project, JH, General Jack, and Salty Jack relocate to the pool.

Hey, don't mind our dust. We'd hate to spoil you happy home. How 'bout some ear plugs?


Shouting on his bullhorn: C'mon guys, get a move on! This project is going to take forever as it is.

Rings up the office: Hey, we gotta get more workers down here. It'll take an army to finish this project.


The pace of construction quickens, stirring the Jacks from their posting lethargy. The walls and floors vibrate with the activity, and the chandeliers swing, their crystal bobs chiming merrily, but unheard over all the ruckus.


Hammer

Hammer

Hammer


Thanks, pal.

Just gotta keep the stiffs from OSHA offa my back sos I can take care of business. You know how it is.


Okay, fellas, I just got off the horn with OSHA. They say that everybody on the estate needs to wear one of these.

Begins passing out hard hats.

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