Kthulhu |
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Jayne!
The owlbear they call Jayne!
He robbed from the rich and he gave to the poor,
He stood up to the man and he gave him what for.
Our love for him now, aint hard to explain,
The hero of Owlbearton, the owlbear they call Jayne!
Our Jayne saw the Mudders' backs breakin'
He saw the Mudders lament
And he saw the magistrate takin'
Every dollar and leavin' five cents
So he said, "You can't do that to my people"
He said "You can't crush them under your heel"
Jayne strapped on his hat
And in five seconds flat
Stole everything Boss Higgins had to steal
He robbed from the rich and he gave to the poor
Stood up to the Man and he gave him what for
Our love for him now ain't hard to explain
The Hero of Owlbearton, the owlbear they call Jayne
Now here is what separates heroes
From common folk like you and I
The owlbear they call Jayne
He turned 'round his gnomish sky boat
And let that money hit sky
He dropped it onto our houses
He dropped it into our yards
And the owlbear call Jayne
He stole away our pain
And headed out for the stars
He robbed from the rich and he gave to the poor
Stood up to the Man and he gave him what for
Our love for him now ain't hard to explain
The Hero of Owlbearton, the owlbear they call Jayne!
Matthew Morris RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8 |
Makarnak |
All this Owlbear love reminds me of the shortest and most infamous campaign I have ever played in. We spent an entire night rolling up characters. (I was usually the DM, so being able to play was a real treat). It was also a first-time DM.
So, our shiny 1st level characters were ready the next session. We started in a clearing. We heard something in the woods, so we investigated.
We heard an owlbear. Maybe two, things are...unclear. In one round, three party members dropped. In the next, the remaining three (how could we not, with an owlbear pounding three attacks a round on us--2nd edition attacks, with no 'standard actions'--with first-level hit points and AC).
The campaign ended in two rounds. Neat!
To this day, the mention of Owlbears makes that DM/Player blush a little bit. He's gotten better since then.
We even named a particularly powerful alcoholic punch after that legendary Owlbear, and he'll always have a place in our hearts. It's nice he finally got a statue...