THEY be Goblins TOO!! (Inactive)

Game Master Edeldhur

Mortimer gives an inquisitive meow? as Ronk pokes his muscular flank. He looked Ronk over speculatively. He didn't seem too smart, and seemed confused over a couple of things(maybe someone bonked him too hard on his head?), but looked strong and his heart was in the right place.

He holds out a paw for the muddy goblin to shake.

On hearing Zeli's comment of him crying in grief he yowls a protest, "Zeli, you didn't have to tell them THAT," and blushes a brilliant red."Ignore the last part, I'm not a sissy," he advises.

When both Medge and Ronk mangle his name, he winces then gives a resigned sigh, "The name is King Mortimer Paddypaws, Supreme Ruler of the Mushfens cats. But as the full title seems a little long for you, you may call me Mort."

"What is it with everyone wanting to be Chief, King, or Admiral?" Twitchy asks Fluffer. "I thought it was only gobs, but that cat and his singing bird are king-obsessed too! Fluffer, is we the only sane ones?"

The vulture doesn't answer, but slowly and steadily flaps its wings taking Twitchy upwards. Twitchy sighs. "No time to worry about that. We've got lizards surrounding us, and no way is Ronk ever giving up that kitty, crazy or no. We'll all have to find a way to all work together!"

Soaring over the ship, Twitchy sings to her friends:

Let's get down to business
Defeating lizard kin
(Can I take these misfits and fill them with win?)
You're the craziest bunch I ever met
But you bet before we're through
Twitchy will make a gob out of you

[Chorus x2]

Neither Medge nor Twitchy are immediately aware of the lizardffolk's location, as they are quite far away. If that is important, I will need Perception rolls ;)

Welcome back!
As for lizards... Oops. My bad. I thought that the lizards were surrounding us on all sides... So Twitchy doesn't see them? Do I need to retcon a bunch of posts and a song?

Not actually back - I'm at the swimming pool as we speak ;) Let's say Twitchy saw them for a split second, but not anymore.

perception to look for lizard folk: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (14) + 2 = 16

If Mortimer fails to see them, he will try to smell them.

perception(smell): 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (10) + 10 = 20

then attempt track them down via scent (if a roll is needed):

survival-tracking by scent: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4

Zeli will use her birds eye view on the rigging to spot the lizardfolk.

perception: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (14) + 8 = 22

"The last time she looked, Zeli saw three! Zeli saw three!"

Perception: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (1) + 5 = 6

Medge starts out looking for dirty boat touchers, but she gets distracted by Gurp's decorations. "Ooo. Gurp has made this best looking boat ever!"

"Calm down, good goblins, hold your birdies. Stop flying and running around in circles. We have yet to ascertain whether these lizardfolk mean good or ill."

Mortimer tries to sound rational and reasonable, hoping to project an aura of calmness on the hyperactive, distracted goblins.

"First, we must determine their location. Then we can meet them in force to discern their intention. If they come in peace, we can awe them with our mighty titles and come up with a mutually beneficial pact. If they come with hostile intent, then we'll just have to defend our territory," he continues in a resolute voice.

"Now why don't all of you tell me all your titles, so I can have my majordomo Zeli introduce us appropriately? High Admiral Medge of the mighty goblin armada, Mightiest warrior of the Licktoad tribe Ronk, I know off, but how bout goblin-on-flying-vulture-with-enormous-stylish-hat out there and one-with-slugs here?"

Where did they go? Didn't she just see lizards, a minute ago?

Perception: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (12) + 6 = 18

She's so busy looking for the lizards that it takes a second for the cat's words to register. That crazy cat wants me to give him a title to call me?

"I'm Twitchy, and no one's fool."

She lands next to the leopard and then sighs. "Maybe your fancy titles will cause the lizards to laugh their asses off, and we can attack them then. If you must have a made-up title to make you happy, you can call me, 'Twitchy Boom Boom, high vizier of the Dread Pirate Goblins.'"

As soon as she says this, she realizes, I just named us and declared our independence from the Licktoads. Huh. What will ol' fatty face Gutwad say when he hears? He'll declare war, that's what.

But she doesn't take back her words. Dread Pirate. It had a ring to it that just felt right.

But titles don't scare anyone. That will make the Lizards attack...This is a good thing! All of the glory and killing of each others foes.

At this revelation Ronk runs to the edge of the boat next to Twitchy.
Perception: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (11) + 7 = 18

In a quiet voice he speaks to his wonderful bride, Twitchy Ronk doesn't see the Lizards. Are they there?...Is Twitchy mad?

Even though you are spying them from afar, both Zeli, Twitchy and Ronk spot the lizard men - they seem to have changed positions, and are currently hiding behind a twisted, deformed tree (or so they think).

Lizard folk distance = approx. 100'

They're all hiding behind the same tree? Approximately how many are we talking about? I'm currently imagining an absurd number of lizards, all standing on each other's shoulders, trying to hide behind the same tree...

Twitchy turns back to Ronk. "How could I ever be mad at you?" Then she pauses. "Wait a minute. Better not answer that."

She reaches out and grabs Ronk's hand. "Maybe we get invaded by lizards soon, but that doesn't mean that you and I can't get married now. Let's do short version now, and longer version after we kick lizard butt."

With her other hand she takes hold of the skull. "I, Twitchy Boom Boom, formerly of the Licktoad tribe, currently of the Dread Pirate Goblins, promise to slay Ronk's enemies, and to keep loving him... even when he drives me crazy."

She hands the skull to Ronk. "Your turn," she says gently, "then we crush it together."

Ah my poor little barbarian. So many things going on and he is so distractible. Oh and I like this absurd number of jenga lizard people

Ronk opens his mouth at Twitchy's refusal to explain how she could be mad at Ronk but shuts it when Twitchy grabs his hand. At Twitchy's short oath he smiles then puts a mucky hand on the skull. Yes together We will crush many skulls! We, Ronk Bonk, formerly of the crummy Licktoads but for some reason don't eat them only like them Tribe, now of the fierce Dread Pirate Goblins, swear to bonk until death the enemies of Twitchy Boom Boom... And We swear to the Mighty Swamp to always love and listen to the wise Twitchy.

With a toothy smile once Twitchy seems ready the skull is crushed! Now We kill the lizards?

"The lizards are hiding behind the tree. Behind the tree!"

Mortimer looked at the goblin love birds and felt a little sad. There was a saying that with great powerbrains came great responsibilityloneliness. It was highly unlikely that he would ever find a soulmate, considering that he had little in common with the animals, and could possibly be the last of his kind. Most sentient beings would see him as an animal, and not one of them.

He turned away from the couple. His ears and tail drooped for a moment. Then he shook himself violently to shake away those melancholic feelings then growled, "I'd hate to interrupt, but Zeli says we have lizards out there to deal with."

Twitchy kisses Ronk. "Yes. Now we kill lizards."

She turns to Mortimer and nods. "I know. They're behind that tree." Twitchy, a secret reader who had learned alchemy from a dead halfling's books, had always switched back and forth between more formal speech and the simpler words used by most goblins. She instinctively switches to more flowery language for Mortimer.

"Your Zeli is a very smart bird. You too are exceptionally bright and well-spoken." There was so much she wanted to say, but with lizards at their doorstep, she kept it brief. "Ronk's my mate. Do right by him, and you'll always have a home and place of honor with the Dread Pirates, silly titles and all."

She gazes into the smart cat's eyes. She does not say the corollary that if Mort betrays Ronk she'll kill him and use his pretty pelt for a rug. She knows she doesn't have to. Always good with animals, she offers her hand for Mort to sniff, and then scratches behind his ears.

"The lizards are all bunched up. Together. Mort, people on peace missions don't lurk behind trees, fully armed. Medge, Gurp, what do you have for area effect? What can we do to really get this party started?" She grins. "There's no one who can out stealth us, and you know what? I've got all these fireworks I want to try out!"

Mortimer slides up to Twitchy to solicit an ear scratch.

"If you intend to sneak up on them, I recommend we go in two different directions. I'm a little bit big for sneaking. Zeli will remain here."

Ronks smile cannot seem to be gotten rid of. Is ok Mort. Ronk is not sneaky too. We will charge the front? Other Gobs from above with fire or sides with sword and slug? Ronk looks around hoping for acknowledgment of his master plan.

Gurp finally looks away from the decoration he was trying to fix. "This stupid. It not stay strai-" Gurp stops dead on the spot, staring at Mort. "When this happen? Why is invasive species here? Why it not trying to eat us?!" A frown quickly forms on his face. "Wait. Someone say lizards?" Gurp quickly looks around for the lizards.
Perception: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (3) + 9 = 12
There's my old friend the dice roller!

"Gurp sees no lizards. You sure you not just crazy?"

Twitchy grins. "They're all hiding behind that tree... I caught a flash of one of their tails a minute ago."

Medge pulls out her dogslicer. "Well. Medge doesn't want them on her boat! Ronk and new cat petfriend aren't sneaky. If they go down and make big ruckus then all the lizards watch them. And we can come up behind them all sneaky sneaky. Lizards almost ruin wedding. Not ok!"

That's what Ronk saying! Death to lizard people!

Another incident with the dice roller's cat, Gurp?

"This invasive species has been here for a while already. This invasive species can also say what he means, in complete sentences. This invasive species also has very large teeth," Mort bares his teeth at Gurp with a big grin, "and fortunately does not eat goblins that converse nicely with him"

"If Zeli says there are lizards behind the tree, its good enough for me", he pads off in a huff."You coming? Mightiest warrior of the Dread Pirate Goblins?", he adds as an afterthought.

Mortimer will climb off the ladder and head towards the tree Zeli was pointing out. move 30 ft .

He takes a good sniff to see if he can smell lizards in that general direction.

perception(scent): 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (14) + 10 = 24

Ronk, if you want to mount, you can, you have 30 ft move, so you can catch up to me easily, and use your move action to mount. If you're feeling lucky, you can mount as a swift action by using fast mount, its a DC 20 ride check

"Oooh. Zeli is thanked by Kingie's praise."

Zeli preens herself rainbow colours as she keeps a birds eye view on the situation.

perception: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (1) + 8 = 9

Unfortunately she is too interested in making herself pretty and loses sight of the lizards.

"Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet. So pretty, is Zeli!"

The creatures seem to stay put as Mortimer begins to climb down the ladder, and even though he can still seem them in hiding, and his nose catches a couple of distinct smells mixed with the damp air of the swamp, the lizard odor is not one of them.

Mortimer, you would be at approximately 70' distance from the gnarled tree the lizardfolk are (poorly) using as their hiding place. Which means scent would most likely not help you anyway, unless they were closer, or had at least passed closer before

From the PFSRD, and among other interesting details about scent I have just learned: The creature can detect opponents within 30 feet by sense of smell. If the opponent is upwind, the range increases to 60 feet; if downwind, it drops to 15 feet.

"Medge or Gurp, do you want a ride?"

Twitchy grabs some fireworks and climbs aboard Fluffer, waiting for a minute to see if the others want to join her.

Ronk rushes to try to climb onto Mort quickly.

Ride: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (8) + 10 = 18

...And his enthusiasm overrode the fact that he has no idea what he is trying to do, not that that has stopped Ronk in the past. Though it could have been the musk that is still coving Ronk. I failed that but I should still have the move action so Ronk will try again.

Ronk stands back up and tries to crawl onto Morts back again.

ride: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (20) + 10 = 30 Like a boss

Once on top of Mort Ronk smiles, We kill the invaders!

Waiting to check on Medge and Gurp's actions - are you guys moving, staying put, to otherwise? :)

Just to be clear, I already fed Ant Haul to Fluffer when I 'rescued' Ronk. It would not be hard to carry either or both of you... Oh, now I have an image of Gurp and Medge, each carried in a claw!

Twitchy, if you manage to do that, I get Fluffer the Magic School Bus in my head, except the kids are replaced with goblins. Though some would argue kids and goblins are pretty similar :P

Medge shakes her head. "Fluffer is good petfriend but not stealthy. Medge sneaks her way to lizards. They gonna watch Ronk, not expect Medge to come up from behind sneaky sneaky."

The goblin pulls out her dogslicer and points to her toad. "Bandana! You in charge while we gone. Keep ship safe!" Bandana just blinks as her mistress makes her way off the ship.

Sneaky Sneaky: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (16) + 14 = 30

"Gurp follow Ronk and keep him from dying." Gurp looks over to Squishy, and pats his eyestalk. "Squishy, follow Gurp. Spit melty-water on lizards."

Mortimer will double move, with Ronk on him 35ft forward towards the tree. Making sure to keep a bush/tree between himself and the lizardfolk so they can't charge him.

Ronk will in this time draw his bonking stick and dream of glory.

Fluffer is not the most sneaky of mounts, but he's fast and Twitchy knows that bunched up lizards makes great bomb targets. She flies out with a grin on her face.

All of a sudden, everything bursts into motion, and the lizardlike creatures take flight as one, dashing into the swamp, and in the direction opposed to the shipwreck.

For those moving on the ground, and intent on giving chase, please keep in mind most of the terrain will be Shallow Bog - basically costing 2 squares to move through.

Also, there are other possible hazards - I will be allowing Survival rolls to anticipate, circumvent, or avoid them altogether. Of course you can come up with any other ideas to address this, or simply just plow through everything the swamp may be throwing at you - unless you are flying of course :P

--Chase is ON - Round 1--

The lizards basically double moved, and are now approximately at the same distance you initially were - You are all up now. Go!

[If you are interested in the action order: Lizards > Gurp=Twitchy > Mort > Ronk=Zeli > Medge]

---

Not currently using chase rules, but may be throwing into the mix all of a sudden - still mulling it over ;)

Are we doing this completely mapless? Do we have any idea how many lizards there are?

Twitchy is flying on Fluffer, and is looking for clumps of lizards to bomb.

As she does this, thoughts occur to her that come out in song:

The lizards are doing what we wanted
They appear to be fleeing, daunted...
Daunted by us? Wait, who're we kidding?
We're gobs -- as such, hardly forbidding!
They could charge us in a giant swarm
Slit our throats; drink our blood still warm.

Twitchy's eyes narrow as she considers the possibilities.

Yeah, the situation's sort of tense
But running from us makes no sense!
Unless they're not really afraid at all...
Unless this is a diversion to make us fall
Into a trap! Crap! We left our ship!
In bad terrain we'll surely slip!

Heart racing, she considers the situation. If I wanted to trap a small group in bad terrain, this is exactly how I'd do it.

Twitchy's not a fool! I'm no one's tool
I'll take these lizards off to school
But first we need to catch one to snitch!
So many to pick from... Which is which?
I need one that is important, perhaps fat...
The one who gives orders, which is that?

Twitchy puts her bomb away, and instead looks for the most important looking lizard she can find.

Tanglefoot bag vs. Lizard: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (20) + 7 = 27

She grins as the tanglefoot bag catches the lizard*, making it tumble head over heels. "I've caught one! Let's make it talk!"

_____________________________________
* If that roll didn't catch a lizard, we're in BIG trouble...

"Zeli, to me!"

Mortimer orders his now extremely colourful raven to him as he moves towards the lizard that Twitchy has thrown her bag at.

Will delay until Zeli lands on my rump, then double move 40 ft (20 ft in DT) towards the lizard Twitchy threw stuff at, feel free to throw obstacles etc.

"I hate that god d@mned accursed muck!" Mortimer complains.

Zeli flies and lands on Mortimer's rump.

Gurp and Shuishy both double-move towards the lizards, one noticeably slower than the other. "You got something to say to goblins, lizards? YOU GOT THING TO SAY?! THEN SAY IT TO GURP'S FACE!"

@Twitchy, mapless for the time being. There are three lizards total.

Twitchy urges fluffer onwards and slightly up, then throws an alchemical contraption at one of the lizards, which promptly falls down in a heap, completely entangled, and apparently doing it worse by thrashing around.

I believe we would need a ride check from Twitchy to guide Fluffer only with her legs, and rummage around bags looking for the perfect ammunition? No need to roll, just something to keep in mind.

The other lizards seem to hesitate just for a split second as one of them goes down in a tumbled mess, but they don't even break their speed.

Mortimer manages to navigate his way towards the fallen lizard creature (almost) without getting his paws wet, and narrowly avoiding a patch of what seems to be deeper bog, Zeli firmly clawing into his rump not to fall down.

Gurp seems to find it quite easy to quickly move towards the fallen one also, while it seems Squishy is actually going out of his way to make sure the chosen path traverses the best patches of moist in the ground. Go figure...

Will wait on Medge till the morning, but you guys can go ahead and post your intended actions for the next rounds. Two of the lizards will keep on bailing out, while the other will probably entangle himself into oblivion.

Medge stops sneaking. She moves toward the lizards as fast as she can.

Survival: 1d20 - 2 ⇒ (18) - 2 = 16

If she can jump out of danger she'll try to do so...

Acrobatics: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (8) + 10 = 18

Next round = STAB STAB STAB STAB. Or just KEEP RUNNING

Am I next to the tangled lizard and also how far are the running lizards from me and Zeli? Might be lanuching a Zeli-class lizard seeking missile?

@GM -- Twitchy's gobliny ride skill is a +13, while guide with knees is only a DC 5 ride check. No roll needed for that. However fast mount is a DC20, so you'll see plenty of ride checks from Twitchy still.

If one lizard is well and truly tangled, Twitchy will attempt to chase down another for the next couple rounds.

Once Mort the Math Kitty gets close enough to a lizard Ronk will attack. Oh and on the way Ronk is entering Rage. Depending if it hits will be what Ronk screams after.

Bonking: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (5) + 9 = 14
Damage: 1d8 + 5 ⇒ (6) + 5 = 11

Gurp walks towards the lizardfolk, and his hand suddenly bursts into flame. Cast Produce Flame. "This for you, lizards! Gurp think you not like where it end up!"

Meanwhile, Squishy double-moves closer to them, taking his sweet time with it.

Apologies for the clunky action resolution - I am not the most experienced guy with the PbP medium. Lesson #1 learned: Always have a map, even if for your own reference ;)

Mortimer, with a riding Ronk at his back, and a cackling Raven at his rump, manages to reach the first of the lizard creatures, who is promptly bonked over the head, which brings a complete halt to its squirming and thrashing - it now seems to be (peacefully?) resting in the tangled mess of mud and some sticky material.

Both Gurp and Medge are just a short distance away, having avoided any deeper swamp patches. Squishy continues to plod calmly along - if you look closely enough it would seem he has just stopped to munch on something green.

Gurp and Medge, another double move and you are at the fallen, entangled, bonked lizard.

Twitchy and Fluffer move onwards, chasing the remaining two, who seem not even caring to look over their shoulder at what may have happened to the other one - they hop left and right, and when they strike a particularly nastier portion of bog, it doesn't seem to delay them much - the adaptable creatures simply swimming through it.

You guys can all give me actions. Distances as follows:

170' - Lizards
150' - Twitchy and Fluffer (flying)
100' - Mortimer, Ronk and Zeli
60' - Gurp and Medge
20' - Squishy
0' - Bandana and Shipwreck

Medge is going to double move. Almost stabbing time!

Mortimer see the lizard get bonked and stop moving. He moves 10 ft from the bonked lizard towards the other lizards and gives a low growl under his breath.

Casting rime frostbite, using familiar to deliver touch spell. If the lizard is playing possum and attempts to take a swipe at me/Ronk, as we move out of his threatened space, feel free.

Zeli glows with a strange eldritch blue, overriding her rainbow colours.

"Help Zeli!", he commands.