Heathy's Isle of Dread Thread

Game Master Heathansson


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I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Dok:

Spoiler:
he hesitates; points the wand down. Then he points at his mouth and says "da da da da da da." and points at the wand. And points at his mouth again and says "da da da da da da." He seems......consternated.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

back in an hour or so


M Half-Orc Ranger

DM:
Dok stows the arrow, sets his bow aside, gives Colu the command to stay, then beckons the creature to approach.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

The creature waves the wand at you;

"Ni cho de wanga that will make you understand me. Sorry for the misunderstanding, friend!" he says.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

"I am called Kaii-to." and he bows slightly.
"You are not from these parts, friend......perhaps you know the strangers inside the hut with me?"


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

if anybody wants to go outside and take a piss, well....you have been chugging sake....


M Half-Orc Ranger

DM:
"I..." Dok eyes the hut, thinking the thing must be magical, in order to fit more than two beings inside it comfortably... Wondering briefly how filling any space with this... swollen... creature could be called comfortable... "It is not likely that I know them. What land is this?"


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Dok:

Spoiler:
"This.....land is Wa. Why are there all of a sudden so many outlanders here? Oh well,.....it does seem strange.
How did you come here? Oh,...your head. You have an awful gouge there. Would you like some rice wine?"
He proffers a small vial.


M Half-Orc Ranger

DM:
"Don't know. Wa, you say?" Dok stands, leaving his bow and indicating that Colu should stay put, he walks four or five paces toward the creature. Ignoring its reference to a wound on his head, his gaze remains intent on the raccoon-man's eyes... "You make wine out of... rice?"

Still unsure of pretty much everything, Dok stays wary and alert.

Sense Motive: 1d20 + 13 ⇒ (13) + 13 = 26


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Dok:

Spoiler:
you sense no artfulness about this creature. He's just a jolly dude with big balls and a raccoon head.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

gotta crash anyway's.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

I'll be somewhat available this evening; later moreso than earlier.


Male Human Rogue 14

"Where's that Tanuki?" Beldan asks suddenly. "Did he go outside for a piss? Someone should have told him that this mansion has latrines ..."

Beldan gets up and heads outside to look for the racoon-dog.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Beldan exits.

He sees the Tanuki conversing.....with a half orc, who is holding a bow (not pointing it at the Tanuki;) and is accompanied by a small leopard cat.

Beldan, meet Dok.....Dok, this is Beldan.

(and for ease of timing, that which Beldan and Dok consider to be the common tongue is the same exact thing).


Male Human Rogue 14

Beldan stops and squints in the darkness, then pulls down his nightvision goggles. “Harvak?” he asks hesitantly, then shakes his head. “Nope, curvy sword, cat. Hello, who are you then? A samurai?”


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

The half orc seems to have a fairly recent head wound.


M Half-Orc Ranger

Dok looks warily for a moment at the wispy young human before replying. "I am not called Assamrye. I am called Dok He pronounces it with a long "o", like "bloke".... If you are missing a friend, I have seen no sign of others until now." Looking unsure for a moment, he continues. "Are you native to this land?"


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

ask him about demogorgon's favorite flowers.....never mind; old old joke.....

Dok:

Spoiler:
you hear the old woman's voice, saying "Rosebud," a memory in your mind.


M Half-Orc Ranger

The half-orc gets all squinty-eyed for a second, then appears to be scanning the foliage in the immediate area, brow slightly furrowed.


Male Human Rogue 14

Beldan shakes his head. “I thought you were someone else for a moment. No, I’m not a local ... I’m not even entirely sure where we are. The tanuki here knows what’s what though. Um ... did you hit your head?”


M Half-Orc Ranger

"No." The half-orc says flatly... "Are there more people in that hut?"


Male Human Rogue 14

"Uh huh," Beldan answers warily. "You speak Common pretty good, are you not from here either?"


Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

"What's taking them so damn long? They didn't drink that much." Altai eyes the door suspiciously. "No point in going out one by one to be ambushed. Everybody's got their pants on? I'll just dispel the hut altogether..."

With a loud *POP*, the little house disappears, leaving Altai and his companions standing by the wayside.


M Half-Orc Ranger

"I have never seen a forest lik..." The hut disappears in mid-sentence, and with the sudden crowd, Dok immediately crouches, quick drawing his falchion, though he makes no offensive movements.


Female Elven Kensai 17; 122/122 hp; Effects: Haste, Inspire Courage +4, Mass Fly, Mirror Image (7)

There is the sudden ring of another sword leaving its sheath quickly, followed by a lyrical chuckle. In Common, "Here I am, thinking I'm alone for miles, and a crowd of people POP into view. I hope you will forgive my nervous reaction." As she speaks, she returns her sword to its sheath. She continues walking, only stopping when she reaches about 20' feet from the sudden gathering. "I am Emrael, and I represent the Lady today."


Male Wild Elf Druid 16 (Shifter version, PHBII)

"I lahks Dino-sours!" Elgan mutters, twitching slightly as the saki and antidote vie for control of his nervous system. (The little druid must miss Stig more than he's let on, to be so dedicated to replacing him,...)

All he hears of Altai's last statement is 'drink that much,...' and 'Pants,...'

"Ah, guud idear!" Elgan mumbles, fumbling with his rope belt.

"Ah yeauh, Muuch bettah! Ah kin see whiy Tanuki goes 'round lahk dis!" He declares drunkenly, standing a-lah 'Peter Pan' pose with his hands on his hips, his magical leaf-patterened dragonskin armor, and little else. As Altai dismisses the house.

"Ah say, duz anywun else feel a draft in heah?"


M Half-Orc Ranger

Dok remains silent and still except for a slight listing of his head to the right, and one brow raising almost impossibly high on his mottled forehead...


Female Elven Kensai 17; 122/122 hp; Effects: Haste, Inspire Courage +4, Mass Fly, Mirror Image (7)

"Ahem, excuse me." She averts her eyes from the druid. "Do you happen to know where we are? I fear my teleport may have gone astray."


Male Human Rogue 14

Beldan double-takes as the elf-woman steps out of nowhere, followed by his companions appearing behind him.

“What? Who? Oh for the gods’ sake Elgan, put on some pants, there’s a lady present, or maybe an evil soul sucking temptress in the shape of a lady, but still. You’re an elf man, have some shame ... Tanuki does it better anyway ...”

Beldan turns back to the two newcomers. “Alright Hokey Dokey and Amreal – now that’s not a suspicious name – are you two together? ‘Cos if this is an ambush, it’s the worst I’ve ever had the misfortune to fall victim to ... if not, what are you both doing here? Who’s this Lady? Anything to do with that Shogun fellow?”


Female Elven Kensai 17; 122/122 hp; Effects: Haste, Inspire Courage +4, Mass Fly, Mirror Image (7)

"Emrael. Emrael Bladewalker." lol, that a great misunderstanding in the making... Eyebrow raised, she looks around, "Who ambushed you? I see no attackers. Have you defeated them already? Or do you mean you expect them to come?"

"The Lady is... Queen, I suppose you could say, of the Island of 1,000 Pines. I am indebted to her and she asked a favor of me, and so I am here. I do not know this 'Hokey Dokey' or any of the Shogun."

She smiles, "You ask a lot of questions. Is this your forest? Do you know where we are?"


Male Human Rogue 14

“Right ... not an ambush then. Sorry, I’ve been a little jumpy ever since that darned chipmunk teleported us here. Let’s start again.” Beldan executes an exaggerated courtly bow to the elf. “I’m Beldan, the guy wearing the face hardware and the trenchcoat is Altai, the one with no pants is Elgan, the short one is Pip, the short one with no pants I forget his name, we just met but he’s a top fellow, the really ugly stitched together one is Claw – not much of a conversationalist – and if you don’t already know the half orc I think he said his name was Doke. I think the tanuki said this place is called ‘Woo’, he’s the local so you should probably ask him ...”


Male Wild Elf Druid 16 (Shifter version, PHBII)

Elgan blinks, seems to sober slightly in the fresh air.

"Ah, whuups. Yeh git dat right chere'." He mumbles, glancing at Tanuki, then at himself. (It seems our elf has nothing to be ashamed of, but still, with Tanuki actually in sight, not even the shape-shifting druid can hope to compete with That.)

He swiftly shifts into a fox, chases his tail a few seconds, and shifts back to an elf. Fully clothed. (If still a trifle tipsy.)

He nonetheless executes a graceful bow.

"Howdy dere chere'! Surry 'bout dat. Guess ah wuz gettin a lil too cumfurtable." He grins, seemingly not the least embarrassed by the incident.


M Half-Orc Ranger

"uuuuhhh..." Standing up slowly while sheathing his falchion, Dok surveys the crowd. Suddenly not at all certain that speaking to a raccoon-headed set of testes that happen to have a body attached was a good idea, he eventually manages to stammer out a slightly over-exaggerated "Ehhh... Woo?"


Bard 8/ Troubadour of Stars 9 Epic Shredder

Pip, wondering where the magical sake bottle had gotten off to, wanders outside the hut and sees the newcomers. His sake-marinated brain decides that a little song is in order

"An unlikely pair
Upon our stair
Are they friend
Are they foe?
I yet don't know"


Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

"Don't forget Svipdag, our companionable turtle." Altai gives the newcomers a once-over before bowing politely to both of them. "Madam Emrael. Master Woo. Good meeting both of you. Now, did someone say something about a teleportation mishap?"


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

huzzah!


M Half-Orc Ranger

Apparently getting more confused... "Who is Woo, and what is this Woo a master of?" As he asks the question, Dok calls Colu to his side.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Woo's on first maybe?


Male Human Rogue 14

"What? Where? Why?"

Beldan is getting confused too.


I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

heh heh...


Bard 8/ Troubadour of Stars 9 Epic Shredder

Pip goggles drunkenly at Colu

"Whoa! That's one Avernus of a cat!"


Female Elven Kensai 17; 122/122 hp; Effects: Haste, Inspire Courage +4, Mass Fly, Mirror Image (7)

The elven woman returns the bows with a deep warrior's bow, feet just so, hands just so. There's a definite twinkle in her eye at the confusion even though she's not sure who's Woo and who's Doke, either. She waves off the druid's apology, obviously no more offended than he was embarassed.

"Master.. Ault-eye? I spoke of the teleport. I rarely get to try the spell, honestly, and I just needed to go such a short distance, I thought this would be a opportune time." She gestures with one hand at the surrounding foliage, "but when I arrived here, I had the feeling that I had landed in the wrong place."

She shrugs and smiles, "Like a novice, I only prepared it once and was unable to return to try again, so I decided to walk this path and see what I see. I had decided there was no one to be found amongst these trees when I heard voices and then the lot of you appeared."

She chuckles, "You certainly seem to be comfortable together. Have you traveled together long?"


Male Human Rogue 14

"Mostly," answers Beldan. "Altai, Elgan and I have been knocking about for, well, feels like years. Pip's been with us most of that time too."


M Half-Orc Ranger

Quickly coming to the conclusion that he isn't going to find out who "Woo" is, or what he's a master of, Dok abandons the thought. "Why are you all in this strange land, or is there even less purpose here than there is explanation?" He does not sound perturbed or aggressive just now, only confounded.


Male Human Rogue 14

“No real reason for us,” answers Beldan. “We pissed off a magic beaver and it sent us here. We met Tanuki here, the little guy with the massive balls over there, and have been getting drunk ever since. But while we’re here we might try to shake things up a bit ... see if there’s any monsters that need slaying, cute peasant girls that need saving, evil dictators that need overthrowing ... that’s kind of what we do.”


M Half-Orc Ranger

Dok seems to consider this for a minute or so... "I have never seen this land before. While I could find out about it by keeping to myself, I think I could do so more quickly as part of a group. If you are not against it, I will throw in with you... For a time... Provided you are sometimes sober..." There seems to be more that he was intent on saying, then thought better of it.


Male Human Rogue 14

"Hey man, we just turned a dragon into a turtle, that's cause for celebration. Of course we're sober sometimes..."


Bard 8/ Troubadour of Stars 9 Epic Shredder

"Yeah, this ishn't our typeocal, umm shipocal,"

Shakes head

"Typical state of things. Itsh not ever day a superpowered muskrat plane shlifts you to weirdsville."


Female Elven Kensai 17; 122/122 hp; Effects: Haste, Inspire Courage +4, Mass Fly, Mirror Image (7)
Beldan Vale wrote:
“No real reason for us,” answers Beldan. “We pissed off a magic beaver and it sent us here. We met Tanuki here, the little guy with the massive balls over there, and have been getting drunk ever since. But while we’re here we might try to shake things up a bit ... see if there’s any monsters that need slaying, cute peasant girls that need saving, evil dictators that need overthrowing ... that’s kind of what we do.”

"Magic beavers and turning dragons into turtles sounds interesting. I'm not terribly concerned about entering the hero business, but if you don't mind another swordarm, I think investigating my Lady's request as part of a group would be safer. I'll even promise to leave the cute peasant girls to you." She grins.


Male Wild Elf Druid 16 (Shifter version, PHBII)
Pendobar 'Pip' Bushytoe wrote:

"Yeah, this ishn't our typeocal, umm shipocal,"

Shakes head

"Typical state of things. Itsh not ever day a superpowered muskrat plane shlifts you to weirdsville."

"Raight Chere'. We'z jes' nurmully deal wit' mun-dane t'ings." Elgan adds straight-faced, if still leaning ever-so-slightly to one side.

"Dis iz fun." He adds aloud cryptically.

"Ah t'ink ah'm startin' teh seez whut Stig seez in dis. Oops. Nope, dat's jes deh anter-doke."

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