Chrysalis Cloak
Aura faint transmutation; CL 5th
Slot shoulders; Price 12,500 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
All transmutation spells, abilities and effects that the wearer of this stiff, mottled brown cloak become subject to have their caster level increased by one.
In addition, whenever the wearer of a chrysalis cloak becomes subject to such an effect, the cloak transforms into a pair of insectile wings, most often resembling those of a butterfly or moth. These wings grant the wearer a fly speed of 60 feet (maneuverability good) for one round per caster level of the transmutation spell, ability or effect that triggered the transformation.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Heighten Spell, fly; Cost 6,250 gp
Chrysalis Cloak
The Good: The reactive power to grow wings when targeted by a transmutation effect is clever and interesting.
The Bad: You have plenty of word count left over, some additional description of the cloak could improve this item greatly. Small details make the item, your description/intro is like a handshake with the voters and readers, you want something firm and strong.
The Ugly: There are a large number of harmful transmutation spells, which also are effected by the caster level power of this cloak. You have lots of word count left, a bonus to resisting harmful transmutation spell effects would have fit in nicely here I think, and perhaps made the item a bit more userful. Flying is good, but there are many other ways to get the ability to do so.
Diver's Float
Aura faint evocation; CL 2nd
Slot shoulders; Price 2,000 gp; Weight -
Description
This small, brown, airtight leather balloon is about a foot wide, and full of air, allowing its user to float. It is strapped on by ropes around the user's shoulders. However, it allows the user to control their depth magically. To control it, the user hums a certain number of notes, telling it how many feet deep they want to go.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, gust of wind, leather, two feet of rope; Cost 1000 gp
Diver's Float
The Good: Nice to see an item focused on something other than combat, life saving/emergency items were rare this year, making your design space a good call.
The Bad: Lots of word count left on the bone, meaning there is room for you to do a bit more with your item. There are a few minor formatting and template errors, you should use an em-dash to show negligible weight.
The Ugly: There is no need to call out the basic construction components of the item, aka leather and two feet of rope. The musical portion of your item is an open invitation to give us a bit more, maybe whistling the right tune calls a sea turtle or dolphin to help rescue you or the like. Don't be afraid to take more chances with your design.
Drunken Bow
Aura moderate conjuration, faint necromancy; CL 11th
Slot none; Price 45,380 gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
This reddish maple wood shortbow has many carvings across its length, seeming hollow inside. It has a replacement bowstring with a cradle attached, like the one on a flask thrower. It can be used to hurl alchemical substances and splash weapons. A flask containing a contact or inhaled poison can be thrown as a splash weapon from this bow; an inhaled poison thrown this way will affect creatures as a poison bomb ninja trick, while a contact poison will have full effect on a direct hit and allow a +4 on the save to a splashed creature.
The bow may be “charged” by pouring a mug of alcoholic drink in its carvings, making them appear “full” and glow red. When so “charged”, the drunken bow becomes a +2 endless ammunition shortbow for an hour. On a critical hit, the target is sickened for 1 minute.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, Sickening Critical, ray of sickening; Cost 23,190 gp
Drunken Bow
The Good: Interesting take on a bow, good choice avoiding the obvious option to make it a "Cayden Cailean" follows make/love/need this item.
The Bad: In a practical sense, a bow modified to fire flasks, would not be able to fire arrows very well, thus removing a useful element of the bow. Your item description falls somewhat flat for me, too much red mentioned, and we all know carvings, runes, etc are a trope description, one best avoided in the future.
The Ugly: Not providing the weapons enhancment bonus when not "charged" with alcohol really hurts on the price vs. use pie chart. The charged up by booze is cool, the not getting what we pay for all the time however is not.
Metallurgical Gauntlets
Aura faint evocation; CL 5th
Slot hands; Price 2,100 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
Polished brass tubes sit between the knuckles of these sturdy leather gloves. Up to three times a day, as a standard action, the wearer of these gloves may shoot three magically-propelled needles at a specified target. Each needle automatically hits and deals one point of magical piercing damage. However, one of the darts is made of silver, a second of cold iron and a third of adamantine. By making a DC 15 Perception check, any combatant may determine which of these darts was most effective against the target. All three darts must be used against the same enemy.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, magic missile, minor creation; Cost 1,050 gp
Metallurgical Gauntlets
The Good: Interesting way to test a creatures DR type and it encourages avoiding using meta-game/OC knowledge, so kudos there.
The Bad: There is allot of word count left here, some of that could have been spent on more item description. A simple item still needs a solid and evocative image, and I just do not see that here.
The Ugly: There are many other ways to determine a creatures DR type, many of which require the use of a skill, so while this is a useful item, I get at least some indication this could be taken as a "I do not like investing in skills that let me learn a creatures vulnerabilities" sort of feel, which can turn off certain play styles.
End of page 5
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Portable Excavation
Aura faint conjuration; CL 7th
Slot —; Price 3,000 gp; Weight 5 lbs.
Description
Though only six inches long, this iron hammer is as unwieldy, and as heavy, as though it were ten times its size. As a full-round action, the portable excavation can be used to strike a solid surface, creating a temporary passage up to three feet in diameter and up to five feet deep through solid material, such as dirt, stone or wood. Passage through other materials is possible, though one foot of metal, a thin sheet of lead, or any living or magical material blocks the passage. The surface through with the passage is made isn't destroyed or even damaged: it is merely displaced into an extradimensional space, and reappears after 24 hours leaving the original surface unharmed. Creatures inside the space when the effect ends are harmlessly shunted to a space on either side of the passage at their choosing. Once the portable excavation has been used to create a passage, it becomes a nonmagical iron hammer.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, create pit, stone shape; Cost 1,500 gp
Portable Excavation
The Good: Non-combat/problem solving item was refreshing to see.
The Bad: To little description of the item, every a few more specific details would have made the item more compelling and evocative.
The Ugly: There are some SiaC concerns with this design. While I have seen item that fall into this much more, I do not feel surprised or wow'd by this item. It works, but it just does not have enough mojo for me to be RGPSS material. Simple can be good, but taking risks is part of being a good designer, and I see no risks here.
Windcaller's Edge
Aura faint evocation; CL 5th
Slot none; Price 32,000 gp; Weight 6 lbs.
Description
The blade of this +2 katana bears the etchings of a simple cloud motif down the blade and pommel. When held, a swirling wind surrounds the wielder, filling his space and any space within his reach with a moderate wind. In addition, the wielder can cast wind wall up to three times per day as a standard action. A wind wall cast from the sword can be a vertical wall, a sphere with a radius of 10ft, or a cube that is 15ft on all sides. Any creature of small size or smaller trapped inside must make a DC 15 Str check to break through the winds. Gaseous creatures cannot break through.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, alter wind, wind wall; Cost 15,850 gp
Windcaller's Edge
The Good: Katanas are the greatest swords ever made, nice to see one that is not a, "so sharp it cuts itself" trope. Nice tie in with the description to the wind powers.
The Bad: A bit more description would have been nice, as there is plenty of word count available. Also, just a suggestion, but researching and using the correct terminology for the parts of a katana, aka the tsuba, tsuka, etc would have made the description that much more engaging and authentic.
The Ugly: Wind themed swords are not unknown, and while wind wall is personal favourite of mine, I do not see where you took risks in your design, alas this leaves me with a SiaC feeling for this sword. I strongly suggested playing with spell mechanics more and finding angles less travelled or less obvious.
Bola of Binding Burning
Aura Moderate Abjuration, Evocation and Transmutation; CL 13th
Slot none; Price 46750 gp; Weight 8 lbs.
Description
This +1 Holy Flaming Adamantine bola burns with a brilliant white flame and is connected by a heavy chain inscribed with glowing red runes; instead of a cord making it rather unwieldly imposing an additional -1 penalty to hit per range increment. The Bola was originally crafted as a means to capture or kill demons issuing from the worldwound, but has spread to wider use and is popular with unscrupulous summoners and any who plan to face evil outsiders being just as effective on all lower planar creatures. When any evil outsider is successfully tripped by the bolas it instantly wraps around the target entangling it and engaging a second function, acting as an immoveable rod and a set of dimensional shackels the creature is quite effectively bound. While so bound the flaming property of the weapon persists in a fasion and deals divine damage instead of fire for 2d6 divine damage per round the creature is so bound. This causes a quite painful and unfamilar feeling in evil outsiders, that of burning. This can be used as an excellent means of coercion (an evil act) providing a +8 bonus on intimidate checks or charisma checks for planar binding spells, though use in this fasion almost always causes the outsider to seek vengance at a future date. The weapons owner may choose to suppress or reactivate this ability once a round as a free action as long as the weapon is within 300 feet. The bola has a break and Escape Artist DC 30, Hardness 20 and 13 hp
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, Flame Strike, Dimensional Anchor, Levitate, Holy Smite, creator must be good; Cost 23375 gp
Bola of Binding Burning
The Good: Bolas are an often overlooked item type, nice to see one get some love.
The Bad: You spend allot of word count telling us WHO would use this item, when honestly those words could have been spent in SHOWING us how useful the item is. I also take issue with any item that requires a good creator but then has a built in torture function, even if it is not mainly meant to be.
The Ugly: There is a trope hunting you, its name is glowing runes. Also there is no reason to penalize that attack roll of this item just because of a chain being part of the item. Your target foes tend to have high AC's, so that -1 hurts more than it otherwise might. A paragraph brake would have been a good idea, as this is rather a wall of text as it stands.
Soul Brew Barrel
Aura moderate conjuration, enchantment and transmutation; CL 10th
Slot none; Price 171,000 gp; Weight 120 lbs.
Description
This large white oak barrel is perfect for aging whiskey or similar spirits. Only elaborate knotwork carvings on the lid that sometimes resemble evolving humanoid figures hint at its other purpose.
A willing or helpless medium or smaller humanoid sealed into the barrel with the aging spirits need not eat, breathe, and are considered unconscious until the cask is opened. Gradually, they soak up the flavor and characteristics associated with the surrounding brew. With a successful Profession (brewer) check (DC 10+days aged inside the barrel) characteristics detailed below, skill ranks, archetypes, class features, feats, known spells and class levels may be instilled as if retrained (Ultimate Campaign) using those rules unless otherwise noted below. Changes are determined by the brewer and need not be voluntary.
Characteristic
Spells Known: 1 per spell level per day.
Skills: 1 point per 1 day. Target chooses skill point replaced.
Physical appearance (weight, height, eye color, hair etc.): 2 days.
Class features: 2 per feature. May be used to gain or lose archetypes.
Age category raised or lowered by one (Affects both physical and mental stats.): 3 day pre age category.
Replace one language: 3 days
Feats: 3 days
Gender: 5 days
One other change is perceived as their natural state: 5 days
Class levels (Classes with retraining synergies or npc classes only. Archetypes may be chosen at first level only.) 6 days per level.
Changes take place in order of least expensive to most. If the process is interrupted all uncompleted changes are lost.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Modify Memory, Reincarnate, Sepia Snake Sigil, Suggestion, 10 ranks Profession (brewer); Cost 85,500 gp
Soul Brew Barrel
The Good: Magical ageing barrel, I have never seen such a thing before, and that is saying something after 25 years of gaming, so nicely done.
The Bad: Possible forced retraining is rather evil, a villain could trap a party in these and make them all into commoners (all without a save for the PC's).
The Ugly: Retraining, changing documented character traits, etc, is useful to players, but to me this breaks the 4th wall in a very big way. Also, high enough level that by the time this item enters the game, characters are going to be strongly established mechanically and thematically, and changes to such could very easily ruin a plot arc or entire game depending.
Windstrike Impaler
Aura moderate evocation; CL 7th
Slot none; Price 33,610 gp; Weight 12 lbs.
Description
This +1 ranseur has a dark oak haft with ornately carved channels running toward a wicked twisting spike. Two serrated blades stem from the cross hilt and corkscrew around the spike.
Three times per day, as a standard action, you can use the weapon to move yourself to another location on the battlefield within 40 feet, taking whatever path you deem necessary. This movement provokes attacks of opportunity as normal, though you may evade these by moving yourself around or even flying over other units, obstacles, and terrain as long as you stay within the 40-foot range.
At the end of this movement, if you threaten an opponent, you may use an immediate action to make an attack. The same surge of wind that facilitates your movement also grants you a +2 circumstance bonus on the attack roll. If this attack hits, you may use a free action to make a bull rush maneuver against the target with a +2 circumstance bonus. This maneuver does not provoke an attack of opportunity.
If you are on a mount, the movement from this ability instead functions for your mount, but you must be the one who makes the attack.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, gentle breeze, telekinetic charge; Cost 17,960 gp
Windstrike Impaler
The Good: Ranseur is a rare choice, even rare than spear, so very pleased to see on actually get call up to the majors, nicely done in going with something different than the norm, we have more than enough magical swords.
The Bad: Your theme, will interesting, ignores the defensive and readied action capabilities of reach weapons and the ranseur in particular. Rather than going with wind (good but overdone IMO) a set vs. charge set of neatness would have been a good call. Play off of the reach and disarm properties, they are there, use em.
The Ugly: Bullrush, while air themed, just does not fit with the item base type, I guess what the item is and what it DOES don't feel connected for me.
Third hand helmet
Aura Moderate transmutation; CL 8th
Slot Head; Price 42,000 gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
This steel helmet has a burnished hand on top of it. Upon saying its command word, a long metallic arm springs out of it, allowing its user to use the helmet’s extra hand for an hour, after which, it retracts until the command word is spoken again. The arm can extend as much as 10 feet and can move or manipulate objects of up to 12 pounds in that radius. As a swift action, the hand can also be used to attack any person within that range, granting its wearer an extra attack at his highest base attack bonus. It can make either unarmed attacks as a gauntlet or use any weapon it has previously grasped (in this case, the arm is considered proficient with any weapon its wearer is). Finally, the helmet grants a +2 circumstance bonus on grapple, climb, disable device and swim checks while its arm is extended.
Construction
Requirements Craft wondrous item, Mage hand, Caster must have a base attack bonus of 4 or higher; Cost 21,000 gp
Third hand helmet
The Good: In the realm of magical helms, I honestly did not see this coming at all, straight out of left field, so well done on doing something different from what we normally see with magical helms, you clearly do not mind taking risks, which is a good trait.
The Bad: There is a level of silly inherent in this item that I have a hard time getting past. A ten foot arm coming of the top of my head, fun sure, but mayhaps a bit more gonzo than folks could handle.
The Ugly: There is no mention of if I can use my skills with the hand, only that it grants a small bonus to several skills. While I assume I can do so, it is best to be specific in regards to issues of this nature. Also worth mentioning, a ten foot mental arm coming off the top of your head would likely ruin your balance, just food for thought.
Tome of the Journeyman
Aura moderate divination; CL 6th
Slot none; Price 10,000 gp; Weight 10 lbs.
Description
This large book is filled with insight into all walks of life. It never has the same appearance twice, but always feels familiar to those who have read it. A player who studies the book while focusing on a specific task will be pulled into its pages.
The book can be used to enter a 15-foot-by-15-foot extra-dimensional space that becomes perfectly suited for the desired Knowledge, Profession, or Craft skill check. The space can hold one creature, up to size category Large, at a time. A player can only use the book in a situation where they could otherwise choose to take 10 on a skill check.
The book allows a player to make any Knowledge or Profession skill check untrained. Masterwork tools and pristine texts are readily available and grant a +2 circumstance bonus on any check made inside the space. There are no material components found within. None of the tools or texts may be removed. Only items created in the space may be removed.
The book’s material and design change after every use to better represent the extra-dimensional space that was created. The air surrounding the book changes, and a corresponding scent is generated (i.e. the unique smell of an ancient library when seeking facts lost to time or varying herbs and smoke when completing alchemical processes.)
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Breadth of Experience, rope trick, masterwork transformation; Cost 5,000 gp
Tome of the Journeyman
The Good: Some nice tidbits of description, such as scent, also wise of you to limit to take 10 situations.
The Bad: Stating the item never has the same appearance twice to me feels a bit like avoiding a concrete description, which really is the "sales pitch" of item, a strong visual could have helped here.
The Ugly: While more clever than just a magical reference book, overall this item is still just a book that provides a bit of skill bonus, they just happen to occur in a pocket dimension. There were several skill/crafting books this year, and as an item type, IMO such is just rather, plain yogurt, not enough flavour or surprise to stand out.
Damoclean Sword
Aura Moderate Transmutation; CL 8th
Slot –; Price 18,641 gp; Weight 4 lbs.
Description
This is the Sword of Kings, symbolizing the peril of rule, marking its wielder as a person of power and one to watch: watch for anger, watch for wisdom, watch for weakness. It is rumored that even more powerful versions of this weapon exists, hovering in constant judgment of those who wield their power, and it's rumored that some 'Swords fall upon their rulers. Some try to give these swords away, and can find no takers.
In it's basic form, a Damoclean Sword is is a +1 Merciful Longsword. It grants the wielder the Leadership Feat when and if you meet the prerequisites, and it gives you a +2 on Intimidate and Diplomacy Checks. You must make a Will Save of 20 if you are to claim this sword for yourself. If you fail this save you will not willingly touch it or carry it. When not being used, it floats near its wielder, pointing constantly towards her, preferring to hang just above her head for all to see. It still may be drawn as if it were a regular sword, rotating and moving toward the wielder's hand. Normally, drawing the sword as a Move action, the same as a regular sword.
Construction (this section was not provided by the author in the CMI thread)
Damoclean Sword
The Good: You went with a bit more of a RP item route than combat, despite being a weapon, kudos for taking the risk there.
The Bad: Your item description lacks any descriptive text of what this sword looks like. If it is going to float around in judgement of me (the wielder) knowing what it looks like and including details that reinforce the theme would have served you well. leadership, while I like the feat and have no issues with it, has been and is a point of much debate, and can be a somewhat dangerous choice of focus. There are also some minor template and formatting errors, Slot should be "none" rather then an em-dash, the strength and aura type should not be capitalized. There is also unneeded capitalization in the body of your item.
The Ugly: I assume the construction requirements were included in your original entry, so I will ignore that. The biggest issue with this item for me is you are directly drawing upon inspiration from Earth. In PF there is no frame of reference for who the title references, and why it carries the weight it does. Using an existing trope or myth from earth does not show us your design skill, an original and non-real world inspired item normally does better in RPGSS than something taken from the pages of Earth history of mythology. Those things are fine to take ideas from, but are dangerous to use nearly directly. Also the "It is rumored that even more powerful versions of this weapon exists" is a trope to avoid, let your item shine, not fall under the shadow of its better counterpart.
(however, some food for though for next years RPGSS, I suggest you google "Honjo Masamune" which is the name of the hereditary sword of the Emperor of Japan. There is a very interesting legend surrounding the swords creation and powers, and if used smartly, could make an excellent starting point for a RPGSS item theme, as it is/was known as a "just blade".)
Arc Rider Armor, electric
Aura moderate evocation and transmutation; CL 6th
Slot armor; Price 13,750 gp; Weight 30 lbs.
Description
With one shoulder open and a sweeping blue metallic bolt for a pauldron on the other, this +2 expeditious breastplate skitters with tiny electric bolts.
Attacks and effects dealing electricity damage cause the armor’s wearer to lift off the ground in a bright blue arc of energy. This electric bolt buzzes thunderously as it shakes the ground and lasts 1 round for every die of the effect.
While the blue energy fills the area below her, the wearer hovers 15 ft. in the air. She gains a speed of 60 ft. and may ignore terrain if it is less than 5 ft. tall. She can pass over creatures Large size or smaller during her movement. Any creature whose square the arc passes through takes 3d6 points of electricity damage. A successful Reflex save (DC 14) halves this damage. Targets in metal armor suffer a -3 penalty to this save. The arc can only deal damage to each target once per round, no matter how many times the wearer’s movement takes it over a target creature.
When using the expeditious ability of the armor, the wearer may choose to ignite the arc and gain its hovering effect to ignore terrain. This does not increase her speed or grant the electricity damage. The wearer is treated as always having a running start when jumping while either arc is active.
Traveling over water immediately grounds the arc ending its effects. Effects granting resistance to electricity end the arc and affect the wearer as the slow spell for 1d3 rounds (no save).
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, air step, expeditious retreat, lightning bolt; Cost 7,050 gp
Arc Rider Armor, electric
The Good: This is a very Raiden and Lightning from Big Trouble in Little China, and as I grew up in the 90's, I love that kind of stuff, it just makes me smile.
The Bad: I suspect you meant to include Fly in the 60 ft. speed but missed it before submitting. A resist or absorb elements/lightning spell requirement would have made sense to include.
The Ugly: This item is pretty inexpensive for the amount of use you get out of it, and while focused, there is some elements of the SAK design trope here.
Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9
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Soul Brew Barrel
Thanks. This contest seems to have been one where I took big risks that didn't quite work. Yours and the other advice have been helpful in figuring out how where to go forward.
Two questions:
The Bad: Possible forced retraining is rather evil, a villain could trap a party in these and make them all into commoners (all without a save for the PC's).
I deliberately tried to make the DCs so high that it would be very hard to do too much 'damage' as it were in this way and expensive enough so that it wouldn't show up in a low level game. As for the save, I went with the rules for touch attacks (which often don't have saves. Basically the logic being if they can hit you they wouldn't have to role a second to hit.
Secondly:
Would this work better as a single use item?
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Jar of Captured Nightmares
Aura minor enchantment and evocation, moderate illusion; CL 10th
Slot none; Price 4,900 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
When uncovered the jar’s contents reduce light as a darkness spell. Those who look into the jar see writhing shapes, that at one moment seems to be a tentacle trying to burst its glass prison, a coiled taxidermy snake that blinks, or dozens skittering legs that obscure what is certain to be a hideous central body.
The jar can be thrown as a splash weapon, on a hit the target must succeed a Will Save DC 15 with a -5 penalty or immediately fall asleep for 1 minute as deep slumber and is subject to the nightmare spell. The target takes damage from the nightmare once per round, and upon waking is fatigued.
As long as the target sleeps the creature emanates a 60 ft. radius of deeper darkness. Anyone inside the area of deeper darkness also experiences the nightmare phantasms of the target of the jar, with no penalty to the Will Save to avoid the damage, this is a mind-effecting, illusion effect with the fear descriptor.
If the attack roll misses, the jar breaks and releases deeper darkness for one round centered upon the square it hits before dispersing. If the target succeeds the initial Will Save then the jar breaks and releases the deeper darkness effect for one round centered on the target, before dispersing.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, deeper darkness, deep slumber, nightmare; Cost 2,450 gp
Jar of Captured Nightmares
The Good: Very nice description, the disturbing imagery fits very nicely with the item, and evokes a very clear sense of the dread this item holds inside.
The Bad: At nearly 5k a pop, pretty expensive one use item.
The Ugly: While thematic and dark (something I like) there is a strong element of SiaC (or jar as it where).
End of page 6 of CMI thread.
Whew! Finally page 6 Thanks Jeff :)
(& no, air step is hover not fly.)
Any time Curaigh.
Thousand Fold Armor
Aura strong abjuration; CL 13th
Slot none; Price 17,750 gp; Weight 15 lbs.
Description
This +1 light fortification scale mail is surprisingly un-restrictive, and easy to move in. A detailed inspection of the armor reveals that each scale is formed from fine rice paper folded innumerable times and sealed with resin and lacquer.
Thousand fold armor weighs half as much as normal scale mail, has an armor check penalty of only -2 and a maximum Dexterity bonus of +4. While wearing thousand fold armor and speaking the correct command word, the wearer may conjure an origami swarm (Ultimate Equipment pg. 314) three times per day, which functions in all ways as the wondrous item of the same name. Only one origami swarm may be conjured at a time, and while the swarm is active thousand fold armor’s total granted AC bonus is reduced by 1.
By touching a spell scroll to a single specific scale of the thousand fold armor and speaking the command word, the scroll is affected by shrink item and is attached to the scale touched. Anytime thereafter the wearer may touch that same scale and speak the command word again, and the stored scroll appears in hand as per retrieve item. Thousand fold armor may only hold up to 5 scrolls in this fashion at any given time.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, animate objects, limited wish or miracle, retrieve item, shrink item; Cost 9,050 gp
Thousand Fold Armor
The Good: Paper armor, who would have thought, nice to see something taken from the annals of history. (paper armor was invented in china, inventors of paper, there is a very cool history channel show about its rediscovery, watch it, it is worth it). Also, welcome attack origami!
The Bad: Someone decided to not check the source of a spell (retrieve item) and got themselves DQ'd. (it was me)
The Ugly: Others have noted that fortification may have been an odd choice of property given the them, after a long hard look at my item, I can see how that was a big theme breaker in some ways, goes to show, useful does not always mean flavourful or in-line with theme. Knowing is half the battle!
Well-Seasoned Cleaver
Aura moderate necromancy; CL 5th
Slot none; Price 96,306 gp; Weight 7 lbs.
Description
This hefty darkwood-handled +1 furyborn fire-forged steel handaxe appears to be no more than an imposing slab of thick bloodstained steel pocked with holes and cracks laden with the remains of fallen enemies. Though the weapon bears evidence of masterful craftsmanship, the handle is covered with crudely scrawled recipes and measurement diagrams, detailing the preparation of tooth-chip pie, stuffed eyes, and tongue-kebabs.
When used to deliver the killing blow on an enemy, the weapon’s holes and crevices pack with remnants of the defeated foe, granting it special characteristics. When filled, it has an alignment matching the slain enemy and subjects of successful melee attacks immediately contract filth fever. Successful melee attacks against already afflicted targets progress the disease by one step along the physical track. These characteristics persist until the weapon has been cleaned, which is an involved process that takes a full hour to complete.
After 24 hours without cleaning, the well-seasoned cleaver attracts an army ant swarm (Bestiary 16) that attacks the nearest living creature when the weapon is first disturbed or unsheathed each day. In addition, creatures within 10 feet of the unsheathed weapon must make a DC 12 fortitude save or be nauseated for one minute. This can only occur once per day.
If clean, this weapon doubles the duration of applied blanches, poisons, infusions, and other liquid alchemical enhancements. When used for cooking the weapon grants its bearer a +5 bonus to profession (cook) skill checks made to prepare meals. If performing this task with an unclean well-seasoned cleaver, meals are infected with filth fever.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, align weapon, contagion, rage, Creator must have 5 ranks in the Profession (Cook) skill; Cost 48,153 gp
Well-Seasoned Cleaver
The Good: A offensive cooking weapon with army ants, ok, someone likes to not only think outside the box, but to chop it up for firewood, so kudos for being daring here. Also nice to see a fire-forged steel item, big fan of that special material.
The Bad: To me it feels like there are two versions of this item, a clean and a dirty version. While that is interesting, the duality takes away from a tight theme to some degree.
The Ugly: Darkwood adds nothing to the item due to its type (not primarily make of wood, thus darkwood grants no bonus) but should be part of the cost, because it its mentioned. Also, for its cost, we do not get as much benefit as I would have suspected, and some of the construction requirements seem out of line with the items abilities. Not rightly sure why align weapon and rage are involved.
Deadly Blade Bandolier
Aura faint evocation; CL 5th
Slot belt or chest; Price 3,000 gp (+1), 12,000 gp (+2), 27,000 gp (+3), 48,000 (+4), 75,000 gp (+5) gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
The deadly blade bandolier is favored by those skilled at throwing blades in combat. When a masterwork blade (dagger, lungchuan tamo, shuriken, star knife, or throwing axe) or dart (including a wushu dart) is sheathed in the deadly blade bandolier, the blade is infused with the properties of the bandolier. The process of infusing the weapon takes one full round after the blade has been sheathed. Only masterwork throwing blades are able to be infused. Blades that are already magical are unaffected by the power of the bandolier. You can wear up to two bandoliers at the same time, one in the belt slot and one in the chest slot. Each bandolier can hold up to six blades.
The deadly blade bandolier can grant weapon special abilities, so long as they can be applied to the thrown weapon. Special abilities count as additional bonuses for determining the market value of the item, but do not modify attack or damage bonuses. A deadly blade bandolier cannot have a modified bonus (enhancement bonus plus special ability bonus equivalents) higher than +5. A deadly blade bandolier must have at least a +1 enhancement bonus before granting a melee weapon special ability. The bandolier may also have the Glamered armor property (+2,700 gp).
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, creator's caster level must be at least three times the bandolier’s bonus, plus any requirements of the melee weapon special abilities or glamered armor special ability; Cost 1,500 gp (+1), 6,000 gp (+2), 13,500 gp (+3), 24,000 gp (+4), 37,500 gp (+5) gp
Deadly Blade Bandolier
The Good: Throwing weapons get the short end of the stick all to often, and I am glad to see them get some love and attention.
The Bad: You spend allot of work count on pricing, which you could have avoided, as this is just RAW, it is always best to assume the reader is familiar with item creation rules.
The Ugly: There is not need to call out the level requirement of enhancement bonuses, and I would have much rather seen specific powers vs. a DIY item, while I get the logic, a DIY item does not really showcase your design talent.
Djinn’s Strike
Aura moderate evocation; CL 8th
Slot none; Price 18,301 gp; Weight 3 lbs.
Description
This +1 shocking short spear feels as if it is dragging its wielder forward slowly like the spear always has some momentum to it. The spear’s name is written in Auran using tiny arcs of electricity just below the tip. Other arcs of lightning occasionally course down the spear’s shaft.
3 times per day, as a swift action after a successful ranged attack with Djinn’s Strike, an arc of lightning connects the wielder to the weapon, immediately moving him into contact with Djinn’s Strike, in all respects the wielder is treated as if he charged. All creatures in a line between the wielder and the weapon take 1d6 electricity damage.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, call lightning or lightning bolt; Cost 9,301 gp
Djinn’s Strike
The Good: Very happy to see a short spear get some love, they are a very under represented weapon class in competition, so kudos there.
The Bad: Others have noted this, but the dragging electricity bit of the description is a bit odd, and while I get where it is going, I don't see the payoff in the item per say.
The Ugly: The spear needs to be thrown to activate its power, however without returning, would you not be unarmed at the end of the movement power? Seems there is some mechanical missteps here. While you noted that you are connected by lightning, that does not per say count as active wielding.
Lei of Lost Souls
Aura faint conjuration; CL 3rd
Slot neck; Price 2000 gp; Weight 1 lbs.
Description
This wreath of white lilies smells of the sea and never wilts. Each flower has a deep red center in the shape of a star. Once per day, a character may use a standard action to pluck a flower from the Lei of Lost Souls and blow it into the air. The flower then multiplies, forming a 15 foot cyclone of flowers around the wearer. Within the cyclone invisible but tangible humanoid shapes are able to be discerned from where the flowers are hitting them. These figures are an extention of the wearer's memories and will often remind the wearer of people they have lost.
Any time a creature performs an action that would provoke an attack of opportunity within the 15 foot radius of whirling flowers, the wearer of the Lei of Lost Souls may make an attack of opportunity as if the creature was within the wearer's reach. The humanoid shapes allow the wearer to attack twice when making an attack of opportunity. This effect lasts 10 minutes.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, unseen servant, thirty lilies; Cost 1000 gp
Lei of Lost Souls
The Good: A magical lei, whhaa...very nice job at finding an new base item to use, and believe me, it is NOT easy to do, kudos.
The Bad: The description includes some elements that don't play into the theme, such as, smelling like the sea. Theme here seems to be the soul of the dearly departed aiding me, so, it would have been a good idea to stay closed to description elements that reinforce that.
The Ugly: Doubling the number of the attacks of opp a wearer may take could (and in many games would) get out of hand. a dex mod of +6 or +7 or more is not hard to get, thus we can net 12-14 AoO in a round, which goes too far, a set additional number of attacks (maybe based on the number of flowers on the lei) may have made this more balance, and thematic at the same time.
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Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8
aka ugly child
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Testament of Pharasma
The Good: I actually really loved this item, and voted it up allot. I have never seen a gravestone used as a sort of shield/mobile shrine, and now that sir, is what I call mojo, many kudos!
The Bad: I actually wanted this to BE an actual tower shield in the form of a grave stone. For all that weight I could have used some AC. Also the visual of this as a shield are just too good to waste.
The Ugly: There was allot of design meat left on the bone here. If the item is going to be an anti undead heavy as hell headstone,...
Many thanks for the feedback Jeff. I did think fairly long and hard about turning this into a tower shield. The original inspiration was the two orbiting grave stones of the Ahmuuth Psychopomp.
http://www.d20pfsrd.com/bestiary/monster-listings/outsiders/psychopomp/psyc hopomp-ahmuuth
@ Damien
Nice, thanks for the link, also good eye for inspiration!
Phantasmal Cup
Aura moderate transmutation; CL 10th
Slot none; Price 18,000 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
This ornate stemmed cup appears to be made of silvery glass, and is covered in depictions of swirling spirits. Possession of the cup grants a +1 bonus to hit and damage with attacks made of ectoplasm or attacks by creatures made of ectoplasm under your control. While spells that use ectoplasm gain +1 to their DCs.
Once a day, the wielder may will the cup to fill with ectoplasm, and drink from it as a full round action. Imbibing temporarily transforms the drinker into being of ectoplasm. While in this form the drinker may move through walls and nonliving objects using phase lurch as the ectoplasmic creature ability (Bestiary 4 82). In addition the drinker’s weapon and natural attacks pass through nonliving matter, ignoring any armor or shield bonuses to AC (including any enhancement bonuses to that armor) her opponents might have. Enemies with ghost touch armor defend as if the drinker were incorporeal. The effects of drinking only lasts for 1 minute, after which the drinker is left covered in silvery ectoplasm which quickly evaporates.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Ectoplasmic Spell, undead anatomy II; Cost 9,000 gp
Phantasmal Cup
The Good: Interesting take on what magical cups usually do, very cool idea to go with ectoplasm, that is a fun choice.
The Bad: Description could use a bit more detail, you are on to a great theme, I would really play that up, plus your item lends itself to strong visuals, I would take advantage of that as much as possible (within word count reason).
The Ugly: While functioning as an incorporeal creature is thematically appropriate here, getting a bit of SiaC vibe. Ectoplasm is such a cool think to work with, I feel there is a more awesome power just screaming to come out here, dunno what it would be per say, but I wanted something more, dramatic, if that makes sense.
Pendant of Overwhelming Flame
Aura strong evocation; CL 13th
Slot neck; Price 21,000 gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
his smoldering red pendant is hot to the touch, and smells faintly of smoke and ash. Crafted from crimson glass and shaped into a perfect sphere, it is affixed to a heavy brass chain and linked to the elemental plane of fire. This pendant allows the wearer to channel tremendous amounts of extra-planar flame to overwhelm the fire resistance of other creatures.
As a free action, the wearer of a pendant of overwhelming flame can bypass up to 10 points of fire resistance with their spells, weapons, and abilities that inflict fire damage, for up to 10 rounds each day. The wearer can instead expend two rounds of use to bypass up to 20 points of fire resistance or inflict half of their fire damage to creatures with immunity to fire. While the pendant is activated, the wearer's weapons, spells, and abilities that deal fire damage do an additional 2d6 points of fire damage. These rounds do not have to be consecutive.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, flame blade, flame strike or fireball, plane shift; Cost 10,500 gp
Pendant of Overwhelming Flame
The Good: This makes me think of Diablo II in the best way possible, also nice description.
The Bad: Utility may suffer depending on the where and what of the game of campaign, also does not call out if this effect stack with others that deal fire damage or that reduce resistance.
The Ugly: Item only really shines when someone with fire spells or a heavily fire based weapon possesses the item, all others likely will get a diminishing or no return. Not extremely bad per say, but for RPGSS purposes wider use is always better IMO.
Rotblade of the Undying
Aura moderate necromancy [evil]; CL 9th
Slot none; Price 73,502 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
This strengthened viridium +3 dagger is unnaturally sharp, cold to the touch, and a glassy deep green so dark it is almost black. They are always found near an inactive zombie or plague zombie that appears to be nothing more than an inanimate corpse. Whoever holds the dagger in their bare hands gains control over that undead as if she had cast animate dead on it, a fact that the wielder senses upon gripping the bare viridium hilt.
The dagger functions as any strengthened viridium weapon, including the chance to cause leprosy or greenblood oil poisoning. Whenever a creature dies from either effect or from a final blow dealt by the dagger, it will rise as a zombie within 2d4 hours of death as if affected by animate dead. Any zombies created by the blade are under the control of the blade’s wielder as if she had cast animate dead. 1 in 10 zombies created will be plague zombies. If the wielder can already cast animate dead, the dagger allows her to control up to 18 HD of undead beyond the HD allowed through ordinary use of animate dead. Otherwise the dagger allows the wielder to control up to 18 HD of undead.
If the wielder dies and the blade remains within 30 feet, the wielder will rise in 48 hours as a mindless zombie and wait, dormant, for the dagger’s next owner to discover the blade and her first zombie.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, animate dead, contagion, desecrate, creator cannot control more than double her HD of undead during creation, creator must be able to animate at least 18 HD of undead; Cost 37,502 gp
Rotblade of the Undying
The Good: Very cool special material choice, very concurrent with our theme, also pretty good description.
The Bad: Undead spawning item, not a bad thing in and of itself, but severely limits its use by many PC's given the evil nature of creating undead.
The Ugly: Those with animate dead get a mini zombie army, great for villains, nightmare for GM's to face, or possibly track.
RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32
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Champion Voter Season 6, Champion Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Champion Voter Season 9
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Third hand helmet
The Good: In the realm of magical helms, I honestly did not see this coming at all, straight out of left field, so well done on doing something different from what we normally see with magical helms, you clearly do not mind taking risks, which is a good trait.
The Bad: There is a level of silly inherent in this item that I have a hard time getting past. A ten foot arm coming of the top of my head, fun sure, but mayhaps a bit more gonzo than folks could handle.
Didn't like this item as it was straight from the Munchkin game. Also shows up a bunch in silly cartoons and sci-fi.
Gloves of Refraction
Aura faint illusion; CL 5th
Slot hand; Price 4,000 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
These silver gloves have three small prisms inset on the back of each hand. When activated the wearer’s hands and held items split into four differently colored images.
Three times per day the wearer may activate the gloves as a swift action creating three images of their hands, and the items currently held in them, that last for one minute. This effect only extends to items meant to be wielded such as wands, rods, shields, and weapons or items small enough to be held in one hand. This grants a 75% miss chance for any combat maneuver or spell targeting the gloves or held item.
In addition, the chaotic nature of the illusory forms grants two additional benefits against creatures who can see the effect, a +4 circumstance bonus on bluff checks made to feint and the difficulty to identify spells cast by the wearer that require somatic components increases by 4.
A creature using senses not based on sight or under the effects of true seeing is immune to these effects.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, mirror image; Cost 2,000 gp
Gloves of Refraction
The Good: Interesting set of powers for gloves, certainly different from the normal fare we tend to see.
The Bad: Rainbow false arms as a visual is hard to wrap my head around. Item description falls a bit flat for me, specific details that reinforce the theme would have worked better than just saying silvery.
The Ugly: While there is some twisting of spell effect, there is still a level of SiaC (or glove) to this item. As a voter I would have liked to see more light splitting or refracting and less illusion duplication on the mechanics.
End of page 7
Plush Guardian of Cuddles
Aura moderate enchantment and conjuration; CL 11th
Slot - ; Price 37,500 gp; Weight 0.5 lbs.
Description
This adorable plush stuffed bear seems to be nothing more than a harmless child's toy. However, the plush guardian of cuddles was created as a means for the wealthy and noble to protect their children from danger. The bear contains 3 charges that replenish at the beginning of each day.
As long as the plush guardian of cuddles has one charge remaining, it radiates a 20 ft. aura that quells a creatures aggressive or violent emotions, as calm emotions, unless they succeed at a DC 13 Will save. The aura can be suppressed or activated as a standard action.
By spending one charge the bearer can compel a target within 30 ft. to pick up the bear. The target must succeed on a DC 14 Will save or be compelled to pick up the stuffed bear and do nothing but cuddle it. This effect lasts for 1 minute or until the target is attacked.
Finally, by spending a charge, the stuffed bear can grow to large size and animate in order to defend the bearer from danger. The stuffed bear is treated in all ways as a normal dire bear while animated. The bear will not attack young creatures and has an attitude of friendly towards any such creatures. The summoned bear lasts for 1 minute before vanishing.
The stuffed bear can also be recharged by being held and cuddled. If cuddled for an hour or more, it regenerates charges at a rate of 1 per hour.
Any and all abilities of the plush guardian of cuddles can be activated or deactivated with a master command word.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, animate objects, calm emotions, suggestion; Cost 18,750 gp
Plush Guardian of Cuddles
The Good: Magic teddy bear that can kick butt and look adorable, now that is what I call inventive and eye catching.
The Bad: There is some confusing language regarding referencing the bearer and the bear itself regarding activation of powers, which can be confusing. The bear is also such a neat idea, a more flavourful and specific item description would sell it even better.
The Ugly: There has been some concern that the bear implies violence against children (as it exists to stop such) and Paizo has a line they do not cross regarding such. While you do not control this, as a designer one must always know for whom you are writing, and toe their line.
Master’s Final Warning
Aura Faint Conjuration and Enchantment; CL 5th
Slot none; Price 10,301 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
This +1 merciful sai has a small sphere of voidglass in its hilt. Once per day as a standard action, the wielder of master’s final warning can make a disarm attempt without provoking an attack of opportunity. If this disarm attempt is successful, the disarmed creature must make a DC 13 Will save or be under the effects of calm emotions. This effect lasts 5 rounds, or long enough for the wielder to make a Diplomacy check to increase the disarmed creature’s attitude.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, calm emotions, cure light wounds; Cost 5,301 gp
Master’s Final Warning
The Good: Very nice to see a magic sai, they are a great weapon but get little attention in the competition.
The Bad: Item description is much to short and vague, you have work count left over, I would have spent some of it here to really make your item pop and stand out in the minds eye of the reader. Also aura strength and type do not get capitalized.
The Ugly: There is a strong SiaC (or sai) concern here, as calm emotions does just, and only, that. Also the concept while interesting, seems a bit odd, as you beat on someone, but calm them while doing so. Also there is nothing to back up why there is no attack of Op when making a disarm, which is a mechanical misstep.
Tome of Legends
Aura strong divination; CL 15th
Slot none; Price 100,000 gp; Weight 4 lbs.
Description
This well constructed tome is usable only by bards. When opened without activating, the pages appear blank. If activated with a command word, followed by the name of a legendary person, place or thing (at least 11th level, as per the requirements of the Legend Lore spell), the book will reveal up to two pages of information derived from the collective wisdom of people familiar with the named item. The information will remain on the pages until the book is closed.
Because of the source of the information, there is a 15 percent chance that part of the information will be erroneous -- either rumor or plain false. If the character makes a DC 25 Knowledge check they can determine the incorrect information.
Construction
Requirements CCraft Wondrous Items, Legend Lore, Caster must use a blank spell book of exceptional quality (500gp); Cost 50,000 gp
Tome of Legends
The Good: Included a drawback that makes sense, which an item of this power rather needed IMO.
The Bad: Usable only by bards is going to hamper this item, as bards are the ones who least need this sort of item given their abilities. No limit to how often the item can be used. Design space is much to safe, there are no risks or surprises to be found here.
The Ugly: As a book, this item does something that is very predicable, it grants knowledge. There is a very strong element of SiaC, as legend lore is the only thing the book does, as there is not mechanical alterations to said spell. Also at 100,000 this is an expensive one trick pony.
Portable Protective Pedestal
Aura faint abjuration and evocation; CL 3rd
Slot none; Price 9,000 gp; Weight 1/2 lb.
Description
When activated, this pocket-sized stone cube grows into a pedestal whose top is at a comfortable working height for the user. A non-living object placed on top of it and weighing less than 50 lbs will be protected from all natural environmental hazards. Rain will not damage the item, wind will not blow it away or even rustle delicate pages, and stray sparks will not set the object on fire. The pedestal provides no appreciable cover. This protection is overcome by magic such as fireball and whirlwind, but not by magically-conjured natural effects such as lightning produced via call lightning. Extreme natural environments such as total submersion or contact with the heart of a volcano may also overcome the pedestal’s protective qualities. The pedestal remains conveniently close at hand, floating beside the user at the user’s normal movement rate. If the user wishes, the top of the pedestal projects light onto the object appropriate to the user’s requirements for optimum viewing. By pressing down on one edge of the pedestal as it expands, it becomes a slanted easel rather than a flat-topped pedestal.
The pedestal may be used three times per day for one hour at a time. Any object placed upon a Portable Protective Pedestal is considered to be an attended object. If the activated pedestal is stolen or otherwise forced to be more than 10 feet from the user, it de-activates and returns to its cube form. Activating the pedestal is a standard action. The pedestal takes one full round to achieve full height. Larger pedestals, with additional magic are rumored to exist.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, floating disk, light, resist energy; Cost 4,500 gp
Portable Protective Pedestal
The Good: You found a design space that was unoccupied and owned it.
The Bad: While I get the usefulness of an item of this type, I have trouble getting past how no exciting or visually bland the item is. For competition purposes you want flash and style and compelling visuals, and alas, we do not get those here.
The Ugly: SiaC is a concern here, there is little play with the spell mechanics, and no real wow factor. Sure as a scholar item this is very useful, but this sort of design tends to suffer in RPGSS, not because it is not a good idea, but because it is very predicable and very safe. I would next year take more chances and really show us your design chops.
Fluxbane Khopesh
Aura moderate transmutation; CL 9th
Slot none; Price 28,320 gp; Weight 8 lbs.
Description
Finely engraved hieroglyphs depicting a wide variety of creatures decorate the blade of this +2 khopesh. It functions as a bane weapon, except that whenever its wielder confirms a critical hit with the weapon, a corresponding hieroglyph on its blade briefly glows blue and its hilt smoothly transforms into a shape representing the type of creature struck, such as a bone to represent an undead creature. Furthermore, the weapon's designated foe immediately changes to match the type of creature struck (and subtype for humanoids or outsiders).
The increased enhancement bonus and extra damage dice resulting from a fluxbane khopesh's newly designated foe apply to the critical hit that triggered its transformation. The weapon's appearance and designated foe persist until the wielder confirms another critical hit with the weapon, at which point it changes once again as described above.
There is no limit to the number of times a fluxbane khopesh's appearance and designated foe can change in this manner.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, polymorph, summon monster I; Cost 14,320 gp
Fluxbane Khopesh
The Good: Nice to see a khopesh, I really like them as a weapon, and more interesting magical khopeshes are a good thing.
The Bad: there was no advantage taken of the inherent trip weapon quality that khopesh already has, I see that as a missed opportunity.
The Ugly: A limitless changing bane weapon is dangerous, as the more I increase the critical threat range, the more I can ensure I have a on demand bane weapon. Not a bad thing, but there are builds and tactics that will heavily enhance how nasty this sword can be, perhaps to a level of too nasty.
End of Page 8 and the CMI thread, going back through to ensure those who requested a critique in this thread but not the CMI thread get their fair due.
Seems I have come to the end of this years The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. I urge everyone to double check they got their review, but as far as I can tell, I have gotten to everyone both from the CMI thread and this thread.
I just wanted to thank everyone for the chance to do this, it was quite an interesting experience, and a worth while endeavour. So, congrats to the Top 8, and I hope to see all of you next year for RPGSS season 10, best of luck to you all in all that you do, and never stop designing!
Cheers,
Jeff Harris
Flying Pincushion Games co-creator
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Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9
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Seems I have come to the end of this years The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. I urge everyone to double check they got their review, but as far as I can tell, I have gotten to everyone both from the CMI thread and this thread.
I just wanted to thank everyone for the chance to do this, it was quite an interesting experience, and a worth while endeavour. So, congrats to the Top 8, and I hope to see all of you next year for RPGSS season 10, best of luck to you all in all that you do, and never stop designing!
Cheers,
Jeff Harris
Flying Pincushion Games co-creator
Thank you for going all the way to the end.
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You subbed in like a champ Jeff. Thanks for doing this.
Dedicated Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9
aka Jayson MF Kip
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Master’s Final Warning
Appreciate the feedback! It was pretty cool of you to review everyone's item.
I had about 150 more words that mentioned how and when the "ability to make a Diplo check" worked, and how it wouldn't work if friends attacked, and eventually, somewhere down the line I realized the calm emotions spell handled it very nicely.
So, I tried to make an elegant SiaC, at least. Use the name, the weapon type (1d3!), the disarm ability, and the merciful enchantment to stress the idea that this was a tool for peacefully ending combats.
In hindsight, I wish I had some sort of language that enforced that it's to be used when you are attacked- -not halfway through a battle in progress. (Maybe a "Whenever your or your allies initiates combat, it imparts a negative level" or something.)
Maybe next year.
Thanks again!
@ Jeff Hazuka,
Learning experiences all round this year, just means you will come back next year stronger and better prepared, I know I will (and will triple check my referenced material!)
Thanks for doing this. Getting feedback is always helpful.
Well done Jeff, & thanks :)
Two more requests came into the CMI thread, so, here goes...
Baritsu Cane
Aura moderate enchantment; CL 7th
Slot none; Price 20,345 gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
This +1 answering inspired sword cane is made of a smooth darkwood, with a simple but elegant metal handle. When the wielder uses the opportune parry and riposte deed and successfully strikes her opponent, she can use throw her opponent off balance. By succeeding at a dirty trick maneuver, she can inflict the confusion condition on her opponent for 1 round.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, Dirty Trick, confusion, lesser, good hope, creator must have the opportune parry and riposte deed; Cost 10,173 gp
Baritsu Cane
The Good: Sword canes are super cool base items, good call going with one, we do not seem them very often.
The Bad: With all the word count left over, I feel a more detailed description, and additional non standard abilities almost have to be added because this entry is so short. Simple and elegant give way to spartan and to short here IMO.
The Ugly: Requiring a swashbuckler deed ensures this item must be crafted by teamwork, or a multi-classed character, which can be problematic. Also, to be honest, this item is little more than SiaS (spell in a sword). With the dark wood element very clear, I wanted something that plays with it here. Also, this item relies to heavily on pre-existing magic weapon properties, this is a design contest, show us what YOU can do, not what has been done before.
Tankard of the goblin king
Aura moderate conjuration, enchantment, and transmutation; CL 10th
Slot none; Price 39,600 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
Once per day when water is poured into this battered and unremarkable metal tankard, the liquid magically transforms into a thick stout with an ever-changing seasonal berry aftertaste. This stout contains everything necessary to sustain any herbivorous, omnivorous, or carnivorous creature for one day without further food or water. Also, anytime in the next 24 hours if the drinker falls below 0 hit points, he is healed 2d4 hit points as an immediate action. In addition to its nourishing affects, the beverage causes two annoying, catchy pub songs to be stuck in the drinker’s mind until sung. When the first song is sung or spoken, six creatures in a 40 foot radius begin singing the song at the top of their lungs and grab the nearest consumable liquid and drink. This effect last for 6 rounds and on the creature's next turn, it may attempt a new saving throw as a full round action to end the effect. The subjects can take only one move action while singing and drinking. The effects are negated with a DC 14 will save but the song annoyingly repeats in their head(s) all day. By singing or speaking the cheerful yet haunting second song, 2d4+1 Burning Goblin Skeletons are summoned to serve the consumer of the stout for 10 rounds. Each song may only be used once per day do create the listed effect but can be sung whenever the mood strikes the owner of the tankard.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, summon monster V, hideous laughter, goodberry, creator must have a charisma score of 16 or higher; Cost 19,800 gp
Tankard of the goblin king
The Good: I can honestly say I have not seen anything similar to this tankards powers before.
The Bad: Theme is all over the place, the item does not feel unified. Also, what theme there is (goblins) does not match the Paizo version of goblins. If you are going to reference a race, it is wise to stay withing the bounds of how Paizo presents said race.
The Ugly: There is a level of SiaC in this item that I cannot get past. Also the Charisma requirement could make this a MCD (multiple character dependant) item to create, which can be problematic. Also, the name just does not work with the description, king and plain are words that generally do not mesh.
Another CMI new request, so here we go yet again.