No, thejeff, you're not done here. Not by a long shot. You still need to explain to me why you consistently try to paint people who don't agree with "never say rape because someone might be traumatized" as disagreeing with "show consideration if someone asks you to".
Disagreeing with the first one is not in any way an extreme position. Holding it IS.
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It makes me uncomfortable when people use 'rape' lightly. I'm also afraid to point out how it makes me uncomfortable because today's culture has drilled in how aceptable it is to make light of.
The one time I commented on being offended by an offhand sexist joke, the mood in the room quickly darkened. For a while, general attitude toward me was less pleasant.
And this is in a group that's probably the best gaming group I've ever had. They're great most of the time.
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As for the personal question, i will answer. If she was really and unjustifiably raped, i would ask her if she wanted to talk about it, and through this, try to help. If she didn't qualify for the above, or refused to talk about a cooperative way with reasoning, then i would also stop playing with her.
I have previously once have a PC and female player (actually, two at the same scene) get raped. It resulted purely from their actions. After talking with them, we said that what happened is logical, they just don't want me to describe it (like i like to do at every gore scene).
1) What the hell.
2) "Unjustifiably raped" is one of the stupidest phrases I've ever heard - how can you even defend it?
3) Why would a PC character need to be raped to further your story? And how did it result "purely from their actions"?! Did you rape their character and then tell them it was their fault they got raped???
4) You're saying if you raped a player's character, you'd kick her out if she didn't let you play therapist with you after?
5) What the hell.
Let us not derail this topic.
If you wish to discuss or accuse me of my ideas, do so via the private messages.
Before you begin writing the sign of "bad person" above my head, answer this question to yourself:
If i went up to the BBEG's face and told him i hate him and want to kill him, and the BBEG kills him, if i cry about "i am always losing at my life, i don't want to lose, etc." would you let me go on, rewind the scene, and let me God-mode kill him?
And what does this even mean?????
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Let us not derail this topic.
If you wish to discuss or accuse me of my ideas, do so via the private messages.
No, my friend, YOU derailed this when you posted...whatever you posted up there - please answer my questions.
Ah well, every discussion is fun while it lasts.
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Spreading the recent republican idea that ...
I'd just like to point out that there's a difference between an idea that a (stupid) Republican has, and a Republican idea. After all, I don't have to look too far to find stupid Democrats with their own stupid ideas, yet because I'm not trying to start some political BS, I don't label those ideas as "Democratic stupidity".
I have not said "Never say rape". I've talked about rape jokes and about rape scenes in game and the casual use of rape as metaphor for beating someone.
So here's my story of it.
As a geek, growing up as a geek who was fairly well read, literate, and had a wide vocabulary, I've always been aware of the alternate meanings of rape. Rapeseed, for example.When I was in the 7th grade we read a young adult book that made extensive use of the word rape in this context, of despoiling or stealing and it entered my class's lexicon as such.
When I, shortly thereafter, began gaming, we started using that word in context of stories. The goblins raped the countryside and the heroes have to stop them.
By the time I was in college, the term had evolved to mean someone who was completely broken, still in a gaming context. "The villain lies there at your feet, utterly broken and raped."
It never entered my mind that people could be offended by this, and women I played with never objected, and I assumed this was because the people I was playing with had the same understanding of the English language that I did.
Now, in 2013, I find it bizarre that the suggestion that some words in the English language have multiple meanings is a no-no.
Personally, I would find it MUCH more offensive to have a character in an RPG be raped sexually, or to casually use the term rape in the context of sexual assault, which, ironically, is the only context we're allowed to use it in on these boards.
Edit: it would be like if a science classroom couldn't use the word retard in the context of a chemical reaction because it has since taken on an offensive (to some) colloquial definition.
"Man, we sure ravished the %$*#& out of that Beholder."
"It's a good thing, too - the last time we fought one, Jim's character got totally ravished."
Lexically, the above exchange is identical to the following exchange:
"Man, we sure raped the %$*#& out of that Beholder."
"It's a good thing, too - the last time we fought one, Jim's character got totally raped."
Are both conversations unacceptable, or only one? Discuss - and show your work.
"Man, we sure ravished the %$*#& out of that Beholder."
"It's a good thing, too - the last time we fought one, Jim's character got totally ravished."
Lexically, the above exchange is identical to the following exchange:
"Man, we sure raped the %$*#& out of that Beholder."
"It's a good thing, too - the last time we fought one, Jim's character got totally raped."
Are both conversations unacceptable, or only one? Discuss - and show your work.
Ravish has a different definition coloquially and just sounds awkward. I'd be down with ravage though.
As a geek, growing up as a geek who was fairly well read, literate, and had a wide vocabulary, I've always been aware of the alternate meanings of rape. Rapeseed, for example.See, this is the sort of thing that the tourism bureau of the Land of Rape and Honey has to put up with all the time.
I already linked that up thread.
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What bothers me about the use of "rape" as slang is the joy with which it is often used (note the word "often," and do not conflate it with the word "always," please), and I have noticed this especially in the gaming community (though more often amongst video gamers than tabletop gamers).
"Aw man, we R__PED that dragon on our guild raid, it was SO AWESOME."
"I'm gonna play Zombie Kill with Bob and I am just going to r____ him so hard, it'll be great."
"By the time we finished, everything in the stronghold was r___d. We won!"
(The censorship is an attempt at respect for Paizo's rules regarding the usage of the word, I apologize if I went the wrong way about it.)
The issue is not just the use of the word out of its apparent context, it is that it is often used as a victory cry. People using that word in that way intimate that to "rape" something is to defeat an enemy in a glorious way. It suggests that "raping" someone is not only okay, it is a good thing to do, something to be celebrated.
This is a toxic, dangerous attitude for anyone to have. ANYONE can be a victim of sexual assault. More people than you think are actual victims of sexual assault. Because 1 in 5 women are raped, and 1 in 3 are sexually assaulted or abused in some way, yes, a woman might be more likely to be sensitive to the issue than a man, BUT given any man is potentially also a victim of rape and sexual assault and many men ARE victims of rape and/or sexual assault (AND they are often socially pressured even MORE to keep quiet about it and not do anything about it when it happens), this is and should be the concern of any and all human beings who has any scrap of respect for themselves, let alone for other people. A person who thinks throwing around references to sexual assault like they're nothing, let alone like they are good things that should be encouraged, is not only insensitive to ALL people around them, but also insensitive to and ignorant of the potential tragedies that could befall him or her, and quite easily so.
(((Of course that we celebrate violent victory at all, even imagined or simulated ones, is its own issue, but one deeply rooted in our collective psyche and to be explored another time, and preferably somewhere other than here and by people much smarter than I.)))
But I feel somehow we as a society, can and should strive toward avoiding associating a word we use to describe one of the most horrible and violatory acts of sexual assault with glory in battle, especially glory in pretendy funtimes battle. And I really don't feel that is an unreasonable or unrealistic expectation.
Interesting point. The use of antiquated language really does change how pointed something sounds.If you used an outdated word like "eggplant" or "moolie" those are still offensive words, but far less than something like the n-word because not that many people know those first two words anymore and they're hardly used.
OK you're going to have to explain how eggplant is offensive.
stuff
Except that we're using a word that also means "outrageous violation."
And I'm saying that, at least for me, my usage of the word in the context of killing entire countrysides lousy with goblins, leaving none alive, and taking all their belongings, my usage is derived from that other meaning of the word.Furthermore, we're on a Paizo messageboard, so I'm guessing that we all play a certain game that revels in the glory of an outrageous and asymmetric defeat of an enemy.
To be fair, I just as often use the terms "steamroll", "brutalize", "owned", "destroyed" or "massacre" in this context.
The issue is not just the use of the word out of its apparent context, it is that it is often used as a victory cry. People using that word in that way intimate that to "rape" something is to defeat an enemy in a glorious way. It suggests that "raping" someone is not only okay, it is a good thing to do, something to be celebrated.
I think you're reading too much into it and assuming that the equivocation of the same word equates with an equivocation of vastly different ideas.
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