...drink the water.
...sit on any of the furniture.
...look at any mirror.
...walk in front.
...walk in back.
...ever ever use the only clean toilet in the latrine.
... believe everything your see or hear.
... split up the party.
... forget rope.
... forget party members.
... forget...
... try to recreate the thermodynamics of a cannon with an glass ale mug.
...make loud noises (unless you really have to!)
...sleep without at least 2 people watching (preferably someone with good Perception and will saves!)
...follow that foul smell
...do it without a mundane source of light, as well as a few magical ones
...let your wand of CLW run out of charges (bring extra wands!)
...forget your 10ft pole (or similar)
...thrust the rogue with loot division.
...split the party. ever. (it's worth saying twice!)
... do anything. Maybe the dungeon will clear itself?
... have wishful thinking without a wish spell.
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...take lone "prisoners" you may come across at face value. (Especially if its a pre-written module and the potential rescu-ee is a girl).
... pick up a duck
... discus tactics out loud in front of a door, or any other place for that matter
... taking little stones to throw at things with you.
...never deface a religious image of any kind. Let a divine caster kill it's magic or destroy it properly.
...never make the healer go first.
...never match a wretched cursed halfing in a game of riddles. Even if you win, you will lose. Safer just to kill it.
...enter it to begin with, so you don't need to be afraid of doing any other thing.
...hit on the attractive woman standing inside a circle of runes.
... touch the gem-studded skull.
... stick any appendage, let alone your head, into any black opening that seems to eat light.
... trust the word of any naked or almost-naked humanoid, *especially* really attractive ones.
... forget potable water and at least a week's worth of rations.
... forget a means of carrying out any loot. (NOTE: animating the corpses of your torchbearers and other hirelings is a perfectly valid option - but they need sacks too.)
... forget at the minimum a healer's kit and to have taken at least one rank of the Heal skill.
... fail to carry a club, sling and a pouch of ammo for the sling.
... forget to have your Last Will & Testament written out and on your person, preferably stored in a water-tight scroll case.
... try to get your ashes hauled.
... let the game session end in mid-combat.
say, "That was easy."
...forget to bring a rope.
...destroy any altar, religious-looking statue, etc.
...sacrifice at any altar, religious-looking statue, etc.
...run to attack a lone kobold standing at the other end of a corridor taunting you.
...jump into any underground lake, river or other pool of water (especially if you do not have any ranks in swim and are wearing armor).
...forget to check a corridor suddenly ending.
...run ahead of the group, especially not into the final room with the level boss.
...keep fighting a monster you cannot seem to hit.
...keep standing in a fire, though it damages you every round.
...avoid a rickety elevator (i.e. elevator trap) by just jumping down the elevator shaft.
...use a fly spell to fly over a clearly visible pit trap.
...keep attacking a dangerous undead monster which your group's cleric has already turned successfully and driven into a corner.
...make a hole into the wall in order to reach another room.
(These all actually happened in my campaigns.)
... adopt any of the encounters as pets.
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... bore the GM to death whilst taking an hour to fashion an elaborate plan, only to go back to the much simpler idea you all had within the first five minutes of the conversation. (With all due respect and much love to my players. :) )
...ask the question: What's the worst that could happen?
Or call the DM a creampuff
live by the creed: "Just one more door...
RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32
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... Stand too close to a rogue when they disarm a trap.
... Poke everything with a pole
... Not poke everything with a pole.
... Charge the goblin standing on the other end of the hall shooting you.
... Trust the sign that says, "No Monsterz Heres."
... Or the sign that says, "Trap free hall."
... Read the mysterious book.
... Even if it is titled, "Where to Find The Treasure."
... Or, "Favorite Bedtime stories of the Underdark."
... And especially if it is titled, "How to Serve Man."
... Read the reading on the wall, even if the bard insists it is worth looking at.
... Trust the old man you found living alone in a pit.
... ignore to ominous-looking statue
... remain standing when all the corpses on the ground are headless.