Swearing in Golarion

[Thomas LeBlanc]

In many of settings using swearing invoking the Gods is commonplace. What are some of the better ones you all have heard for Golarion?

My favs: (may be slighty adult themed):

1. dirty fist of Abadar
2. Besmara's crusty clam
3. swill of Cayden

[Doodlebug Anklebiter]

Hee hee!

I don't have anything to add, but I like cursing. I think it's clever.

[Fromper]

In one Pathfinder Society adventure, one of the enemy NPCs enters the scene yelling this: "Where in Asmodeus’s chamber pot are my bloody slaves?"

[James Jacobs]

My favorite I've come up with so far...

Spoiler:

Sweet Besmara's cleat!

Besmara seems like she'd be particularly fond of her followers cursing and swearing, I think.

[Set]

The only religious themed swear I've had a character use so far is;

Spoiler:

by Calistria's honeyed thighs!

although my Cleric of Nethys regularly refers to his god as 'two-faced,' which Nethys kind of is, on more than one level.

I've never written up a knight of Iomedae, but I could see one irreverently referencing 'Iomedae's impenetrable chastity belt!'

[Steelfiredragon]

Spoiler:

Iomedae's Knickers
By Calsitria's backside
By Desna's insert body part here

[Bill Lumberg]

"Merciful Cthuhlu!"

[Digitalelf]

For when things aren't going a character's way (like having a streak of bad luck), I like:

Spoiler:

"Desna laughs" from "Prince of Wolves"...

[Klaada Hellscreamer]

What about my personal favourite:

Spoiler:

"By Sarenrae's Sultry Sausage!!!"

[Stockvillain]

@Bill Lumberg: I actually do say "Sweet, merciful Cthulhu!" quite often when I swear. That's in real life, too, mind you.

[NoStrings]

A player with a dwarf fighter in our Kingmaker campaign recently came up with:

Spoiler:

"By Torag's balls!"

[Loren Peterson]

I once had a dwarf from the frigid lands of the Linnorn kings who exclaimed
"By Torag's beard it's colder than a frost giant's balls out here!"

[Kajehase]

Wouldn't the balls be one of the warmer parts of the body?

Well, depending on the type of underwear the frost giant is sporting. ;)

[Kevin Andrew Murphy]

By Abadar's three golden balls!

(My logic is that if our world's pawnbrokers can borrow the balls from the Medicis who borrowed them from St. Nicholas, Abadar can borrow them in turn.)

[Mothman]

There was a good one in the Worldwound Gambit, I think it was

Spoiler:

‘By Iomedae’s tapered t~%&’ or something similar.

[Matthew Morris]

Well my Realms characters would swear by 'Sune's left nipple' so that could be used.

I like as a slam on followers of Irori's self ascention "By Irori's perfected ego!"

"By Cayden's Codpiece."

"Well tie me up and call me a Kuthite!"

"By Sheylin's ample bosoom!"

"By Gorum's armored aft..."

[Drejk]

My favorites: "Gods of Abyss!" and "Gods Of The Underworld!"

[Set]

"Devil dogs!"

[Thomas LeBlanc]

Set wrote:

"Devil dogs!"

Yep, definitely a curse...

Matthew Morris wrote:

"Well tie me up and call me a Kuthite!"

My favorite so far.

May your necks feel the blessing of Achaekek's claw!

[Ice Titan]

"Besmara's breasts!"

"By Besmara's blessed breath!"

"Colder than an ice devil's <insert body part to preference>"

"Son of a Calistrian whore!"

"Darker than Zon-Kuthon's <insert body part to preference>"

Thinking of more as I go on for S&S, where ridiculous cursing should be commonplace.

[Steelfiredragon]

How about
Dirtier than Zon-kuthon's unwashed backside???

[Aeshuura]

My personal favorite!

spoiler:

"By Mother Monster's Hairy Teat!"

[Ice Titan]

Steelfiredragon wrote:

How about

Dirtier than Zon-kuthon's unwashed backside???

Good, but "Dirtier than Urgathoa's unwashed <insert body part to preference>" is more appropriate considering her domain is disease and filth.

[Drejk]

Also "May Abyss devour you!"

[Set]

Hellknight battle cry;

"Asmodeus take the hindmost!"

Other random exclamations;

Spoiler:

"By Gozreh's nebulous nethers!"

"He as cold and treacherous as Besmara's salty bosum!"

"This place reeks of death, like the bony arse of Urgathoa!"

And for the boy gods, there's gotta be curses involving 'Gorum's spikey bits' and 'Old Deadeye's shaft.'

[Kevin Andrew Murphy]

"By Besmara's briny britches!"

"Wrinkled as Gyronna's withered nethers!"

[chavamana]

My personal favorite and used by far to many of my characters: "Desna's starry nipples."

[Kajehase]

Shelyn's massive mammaries!

[gigglestick]

NoStrings wrote:

A player with a dwarf fighter in our Kingmaker campaign recently came up with:

** spoiler omitted **

Spoiler:

We had "By Iomedae's Balls" in one campaign...

But my present character in ROTR likes to invoke all sorts of deific swearing, often mixing body parts and domains into the wrong diety.

[Steelfiredragon]

By ARoden's aftershave!!!

By Calistira's vengeful bossom!

[StrangePackage]

I had a character who was the foremost authority on blasphemy in our campaign.

Spoiler:

His standard was "Cayden's vomit on my shoes"
"Gorum's ass in a rusty bucket"
"Shelyn's lacy underthings"
"Rogavug's many hairy legs"
"Clean Lamashtu's kennel"

[Drejk]

I'd paraphrase one Lucius Vorenus substituting Abadar for Concordia but it would certainly violate PG-13 rating of the board.

[Kazarath]

Is it just me or am I sensing a theme here........

[baron arem heshvaun]

Not a curse or a boast but rather an Oath all in the Inner Courts of Cheliax adhere to:

"No respite, no quarter given, no pause in the struggle, until Andoran is ours again and General Gorthoklek teabags Talmandor."

There is also the Tian Xia curse based on this real world saying that goes like this:

[Cheng MacCheng of Clan MacCheng]

baron arem heshvaun wrote:

There is also the Tian Xia curse based on this real world saying that goes like this:

"May Pathfinders take keen interest in your belongings."

[Steelfiredragon]

Lamashtu's breath was one that I had a goblin use in some of my fan fiction......

[pathar]

My players have suggested "Cayden's hangover!" and "Cayden's bar tab!"

[Shuriken Nekogami]

here are a few i just came up with on the spot

"i'm not a masochist, i'm just a Kuthite!"

"ever wonder why madness is governed by a bloody Goddess?"

"Desna Hates Me!"

"one day, i will unlock Iomedaes Chastity belt!"

"By Gorums Bloody Steel Spikes!"

"Again... Sarenrae has sent us to another hot, sandy, hell!"

"i'm so hungry, i could eat Erastil's Rump!"

[Matthew Morris]

Well as an insult. "You're such a <blank> that Erastil wants you to stay single."

To keep up with the anatomy ones "Erastil's great rack."

[LazarX]

Mine is

"By Cayden's Cracked Cup!"

[Drejk]

"By the Nethys' shadow!"
"By the Nethys' Left Hand!" (i.e. dark magic)
"Geb's rotten balls!"
"Rahadoum's blessing" (sarcastic)
"Rovagug on you!" (alternative "Urgathoa on you!")
"By The Dark Beyond The Stars!"
"May the Asmodeus/Zon Kuthon chain you!" (depending upon region and subtle difference in meaning - Asmodeus suggest enslaving, Zon Kuthon trefers more to torment).

[Cralius the Dark]

After waking up on an unknown island, my dwarf stood up, brushed himself off, stared out into the ocean and said:

:

ARODENS @#$%

Anyone who has watched at least 10 minutes of Spartacus on Starz knows what he said

[Steelfiredragon]

By The Keel Hauling of Besmara

[Oceanshieldwolf]

My only PbP character, an aged Oracle of Bones with the wasting curse who worships Pharasma (don't get me started...) was knocked unconscious in her very first combat. Her dream thoughts ran thusly:
"Pharasma, fickle mistress, do not take me!"
Thankfully she made her stabilization roll.

[Steelfiredragon]

By Iomedae's Blade!

[psychicmachinery]

I've always been partial to

Spoiler:

By Pharasma's frozen teat!

[Set]

"By the festering fetlock of Asmodeus!"

[Bill Lumberg]

Stockvillain wrote:

@Bill Lumberg: I actually do say "Sweet, merciful Cthulhu!" quite often when I swear. That's in real life, too, mind you.

I have only used mine here. Do you wind up having to explain or do you just let people wallow in confusion?

[Steelfiredragon]

My Sarenrae Burn you where the sun don't shine!

[Irbis]

For Galt:"(Cursed One) for (Revolutionaíry Dictator Title)!"

You spawn of Rovagug!
You son/daughter/whatever of Lamashtu!

I will tell the Inevitables (or Hounds of Tindalos)!

Pazuz ...er...

For the villains: "I should have called myself adventurer!"

More of those innuendos:
Twosided Wand/Rod of Nethys!
I would also love to be Iomedae's 'sword'...
Key of Sire Adabar!
And Asmodeus puts his pen into the inkpot!