| 16 people marked this as a favorite. |
Tonight I was at my FLGS and I didn't know that a couple people there had found out about my transition and what my name is now. They showed up for a game of Eldritch Horror and when they sat down, they just used all the correct pronouns and the correct name. I never had to say a word to them. A new guy I had never met joined us and he just jumped right in with the correct pronouns and used the correct name.
I don't think I should be surprised anymore. It's been 2 years since I started my transition and I'm getting incredibly more and more comfortable being myself. Yet, whenever it happens the first time I'm still shocked. I really like the game store I frequent and the people in my neighborhood. Sure, there are a few jerks, but overall, the people around here are wonderful people.
Oh, and in case anyone is wondering, we saved the world from the horrors of Yig. It was a hard battle, but we managed to pull out a win. I'm shocked that we did it. We were losing hard from the beginning, but then everything started coming up in our favor.
| 6 people marked this as a favorite. |
That's so fantastically wonderful! Especially because really, the event itself is very ordinary--hopefully it can move closer and closer to just being the boring normal! It sounds like a really lovely game night. :D
|
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
That's wonderful! I've been stepping my toes into the water and, while my friends and partner have been wildly supportive, most everyone else has just gone "neat" and then continued to use the wrong pronouns (and contrary to my behavior here, I don't feel confident enough to correct people in person). It makes me happy to see that it's going well for you.
We were losing hard from the beginning, but then everything started coming up in our favor.
this feels like a metaphor
| 4 people marked this as a favorite. |
That's wonderful! I've been stepping my toes into the water and, while my friends and partner have been wildly supportive, most everyone else has just gone "neat" and then continued to use the wrong pronouns (and contrary to my behavior here, I don't feel confident enough to correct people in person). It makes me happy to see that it's going well for you.
We were losing hard from the beginning, but then everything started coming up in our favor.this feels like a metaphor
I don't make a big deal out of correcting people. I make a quick comment and correct them politely. If they change, that's awesome and we all move on. If they refuse or demand patience, then I take a different approach. Because my voice is still not always as feminine as I would like, a couple people I normally play tabletop games with make a mistake once in a while. They have found it easier and better for them to just call me Cindy or CJ instead of trying to remember the pronouns. I'm ok with that. They are putting forth the effort. It's the people who flat out refuse. Those people are removed from my life quickly. It was difficult and painful at first, but the more I did it, the better I felt all around.
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
That's so fantastically wonderful! Especially because really, the event itself is very ordinary--hopefully it can move closer and closer to just being the boring normal! It sounds like a really lovely game night. :D
What's funny is that it is normal. Normal for everyone except me. I'm still in awe every time. I'll eventually come around. I may be too old to roll dice by then, but I'm sure I'll get there.
| 3 people marked this as a favorite. |
*hugs Losonti*
These ones are extra good cause it’s my birthday, BIRTHDAY HUGS!
*channels positive feelings and offers hugs to anyone and everyone else who wants or needs some*
Happy birthday!
| 6 people marked this as a favorite. |
I don't think it's intentional, it's more like...thoughtlessness? That word is meaner than I want it to be, but I can't think of a better one. They just don't think about it.
It's often thoughtlessness. They aren't thinking. They need to think until it's a habit and then they won't have to think anymore. I have several friends who are non-binary and it's difficult for me to use their pronouns because I don't see them very often or I only see them online. I have to think about them and actively make sure that I do things correctly. When I know that I'm going to be spending time with them in person, I take the time to practice before going out to make sure that I get it right.
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
Oh s~%!, happy birthday!!!
|
|
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
Yeah, I've slipped up plenty on my own (and honestly, sometimes I accidentally misgender myself in my internal monologue), so I don't take it personally.
I'm lucky in that I have people in my life (including at work) who are willing to correct people on my behalf, even when I'm not around.
| 7 people marked this as a favorite. |
I still misgender myself sometimes. It's more difficult when I'm talking about my past, especially my Army stories. I was in an all male unit and I don't object to my nickname (Grover) that I was assigned.
It's great that people have your back even when you aren't around. That really helps with boosting your mood when you are thinking that you're alone. You have something to remind yourself that you aren't.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Happy Life Anniversary, Rysky.
On the pronoun topic:
We have someone in the local gaming community that had shifted to female pronouns, which was a bit of a challenge but we'd finally got it kind of hammered out with minimal slippage... and then they shifted to nov/novself.
That secondary (but no less important) change is really tripping us all up even though we're trying our hardest, and we've been using she/they (versus other worse pronouns) when we mess up, so I think that's progress?
| 7 people marked this as a favorite. |
That's very reassuring, honestly. I always feel like I'm doing things "wrong," somehow.
It's insanely common. My dreams still misgender me and I only register it when I wake up. Habits are hard to break! It means literally nothing about what's true.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
That's very reassuring, honestly. I always feel like I'm doing things "wrong," somehow.It's insanely common. My dreams still misgender me and I only register it when I wake up. Habits are hard to break! It means literally nothing about what's true.
Y'know, I wonder if my dreams are misgendering me or just searching as much as I am.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
You share a birthday with one of my oldest friends.
I also should have known you were a fellow Sagittarius.
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
*hugs Losonti*
These ones are extra good cause it’s my birthday, BIRTHDAY HUGS!
*channels positive feelings and offers hugs to anyone and everyone else who wants or needs some*
I didn't have my glasses on when I saw this at first and I thought you were whipping out the birthday legs, as it is your birthday.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
That's it. All Sagittarius need to whip out the birthday legs on their birthday now.
| 6 people marked this as a favorite. |
[smoking bubble pipe]
Ten legs... nine v--
| 6 people marked this as a favorite. |
I sacrificed my star sign for dark power. Now I am without sign. Anyone trying to read my horoscope just ends up staring into the infinite reaches of the void and I have to snap them out of it.
It's actually kind of annoying.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I sacrificed my star sign for dark power. Now I am without sign. Anyone trying to read my horoscope just ends up staring into the infinite reaches of the void and I have to snap them out of it.
It's actually kind of annoying.
Well, have you looked at non-Western astrological signs for any prospects to replace them?
Just because a thing has been sacrificed does not mean it cannot be replaced .
Just like Names. Even 'No Name' is... still a Name, paradoxically enough.
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
[smoking bubble pipe]
Ten legs... nine v--
Imagine.
| 9 people marked this as a favorite. |
Yeah, I got tired of people deciding to guess.
I am filled with anger and sorrow.
Angry because for all professions of the Golden Rule "Do unto others as one would have others do unto one" this filth exists.
I was raised Catholic. Yes, things were rough. But it was looking promising for figuring myself out and trying to reconcile what I was raised on with what RL lessons I've learned.
Now?
No. Failing to recognize people as people and calling them 'sinners' for.. being people is not any faith I want to have influencing my spiritual development.
Anyone got better belief paths I can look at to learn from?
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I am filled with anger and sorrow.Angry because for all professions of the Golden Rule "Do unto others as one would have others do unto one" this filth exists.
I was raised Catholic. Yes, things were rough. But it was looking promising for figuring myself out and trying to reconcile what I was raised on with what RL lessons I've learned.
Now?
No. Failing to recognize people as people and calling them 'sinners' for.. being people is not any faith I want to have influencing my spiritual development.
Anyone got better belief paths I can look at to learn from?
I like Witchcraft (not Wicca, but Witchcraft) as it is very personal and you can pick and choose what parts to practice/put your energy into. (Wicca is a bit more of a religion, with some fixed beliefs).
Some people even integrate parts of catholicism into their practice of witchcraft (such as guardian angels).
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I am filled with anger and sorrow.Angry because for all professions of the Golden Rule "Do unto others as one would have others do unto one" this filth exists.
I was raised Catholic. Yes, things were rough. But it was looking promising for figuring myself out and trying to reconcile what I was raised on with what RL lessons I've learned.
Now?
No. Failing to recognize people as people and calling them 'sinners' for.. being people is not any faith I want to have influencing my spiritual development.
Anyone got better belief paths I can look at to learn from?
After evaluating several religions and faiths, I have realized that none match my worldview. I'm an atheist. Specifically, an agnostic atheist and a strong atheist. Yes, atheism has some variety too. I find that it suits me better and explains the world to me better than religions.
| 4 people marked this as a favorite. |
The Society of Friends has a pretty good attitude. I really don't care for evangelical religions, nor for ones that have any concept of eternal punishment. I could see myself becoming a Quaker if there was a church in my area.
| 4 people marked this as a favorite. |
I'm a Christian, but boy do I hate the Christian church most of the time. Looooots and lots of stuff that they've just sort of... invented, wholesale, that doesn't appear in the Bible or that was slapped in at the end by Paul (who sucks; I don't consider anything he wrote to be from God).
...BUUUUUUUUUUUUUT that might be a little too involved for this forum ;D
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I'm a Christian, but boy do I hate the Christian church most of the time. Looooots and lots of stuff that they've just sort of... invented, wholesale, that doesn't appear in the Bible or that was slapped in at the end by Paul (who sucks; I don't consider anything he wrote to be from God).
...BUUUUUUUUUUUUUT that might be a little too involved for this forum ;D
Not sure why but a lot of popular fiction seems to influence what people think appears in the Bible. Everything from Dante's Inferno to Left Behind. None of it has anything to do with the Bible. But you can't tell certain sects that.
And yes, Paul was a particularly zealous, selfish jerk. But at the same time I am not sure. I am a huge fan of the Council at Nicea, and I know for a fact there were supposed to be tons of extra books in the Bible that ended up being edited, removed, or the person who was bringing their religious text to the council got waylaid by Savage thieves on the way to the way to the meeting, unfortunate that it was in a bad part of town, huh()? He could have been very much not a jerk and had a lot of nuance to his views, but as the book was put together by squabbling mob of powerful men who each thought they were right, we will never hear opposing views on it.
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
I keep my little home-grown pagan faith to myself. It helped me find my identity, and brings me a lot of joy in a world that is so often hateful and cruel.
Forever grateful to my goddess.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
And yes, Paul was a particularly zealous, selfish jerk. But at the same time I am not sure.
Okay so with that in mind:
Whoever it is that wrote basically every book after the Gospels was a jerk ;P| 3 people marked this as a favorite. |
[smoking bubble pipe]
Ten legs... nine v--
"My right leg is Thanksgiving. My left leg is Xmas. Come up and see me between the holidays" - Mae West
Could make for fun all year round!
As for religion, I have had good experiences with the local Unitarian Church. They are super inclusive, even of atheists and agnostics, and seem to basically be about the good aspects of religion, not the negative ones.
On a more general level, I find that it is always better to put stock in ideals rather than organizations and individuals. Regardless of how good things start out, there is usually an "Animal Farm" effect that tends to drag the aspirational down by the negative aspects of hierarchy.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
That's why I like the Quakers, honestly. Rejecting even the Bible's ultimate authority in favor of what the individual thinks is right? That sits well with me.
And yes, Paul was a particularly zealous, selfish jerk. But at the same time I am not sure.Okay so with that in mind:
Whoever it is that wrote basically every book after the Gospels was a jerk ;P
There were supposed to be so many more gospels. Hell, even a gospel according to Judas. Jesus' early days as a holy kid getting up to holy kid nonsense were supposed to be in there too. Instead we got...this.
See, *I* would appreciate a Gospel according to Judas.
From the little bit I remember his betrayal was an effort to try and protect a friend that kind of spiraled out of control and it'd be interesting to see what his take on the Messiah was.
I don't know if that makes me a heretic of the vilest order, a completionist wanting to know the 'whole story' or some mix of the two.
| 7 people marked this as a favorite. |
So tonight I was at my FLGS and we were playing Eldritch Horror. There were 5 guys and myself at the table. They were complaining that it was getting hot. I told them that it was because of my new dress! They laughed and took pictures. It was a good night!
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
See, *I* would appreciate a Gospel according to Judas.From the little bit I remember his betrayal was an effort to try and protect a friend that kind of spiraled out of control and it'd be interesting to see what his take on the Messiah was.
I don't know if that makes me a heretic of the vilest order, a completionist wanting to know the 'whole story' or some mix of the two.
Well, hey, if you haven't seen Jesus Christ Superstar yet, I've got good news for you!
Y'know, I sometimes sing the theme at work just to be a provocateur, especially when someone does something monumentally stupid -- it starts off as profanity, but because it's lyrical it transcends to 'music'
So doing seasonal shopping today and went to a store I haven't been to in a few presidential administrations -- Quest Books, which is near the Theosophical Society of Wheaton.
I had forgotten just how calming that store was/is.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Well, hey, if you haven't seen Jesus Christ Superstar yet, I've got good news for you!
See, *I* would appreciate a Gospel according to Judas.From the little bit I remember his betrayal was an effort to try and protect a friend that kind of spiraled out of control and it'd be interesting to see what his take on the Messiah was.
I don't know if that makes me a heretic of the vilest order, a completionist wanting to know the 'whole story' or some mix of the two.
The 1973 Jesus Christ Superstar movie is fantastic and worth watching even if you aren't that into musicals and aren't religious. It it the most 70s thing I have ever seen and it is glorious. It has brilliant casting and is wonderfully dramatic. It does a great job of both critiquing the biblical jesus story and reveling in the tragedy and drama of it.
The songs and music also all absolutely slap and end up in people's playlists after they watch it.
| 8 people marked this as a favorite. |
I am honestly stunned at how many people seem to see a thread that states as its central premise, "hey, this isn't the space for starting huge endless arguments, feel free to start a different thread for them, though", and see that as a personal attack on them and their right to Debate Me.
What, was there a Ben Shapiro meet-and-greet that just ended next door, or something? I can't decide what's worse, the entitlement or the severe boundary issues.
It doesn't make me happy. I started the thread to try to get away from the endless contrarianism, but it followed me home like a sea lion.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I am honestly stunned at how many people seem to see a thread that states as its central premise, "hey, this isn't the space for starting huge endless arguments, feel free to start a different thread for them, though", and see that as a personal attack on them and their right to Debate Me.
What, was there a Ben Shapiro meet-and-greet that just ended next door, or something? I can't decide what's worse, the entitlement or the severe boundary issues.
It doesn't make me happy. I started the thread to try to get away from the endless contrarianism, but it followed me home like a sea lion.
They seem to also be against the idea of safe spaces? Like, they think everyone on the internet should be unsafe at all times?
The sense of entitlement is real these days.
...has to deal with it every day at work...
I don't care if folks feel their freedoms are being impacted because they can't go into a retail location (a PRIVATE BUSINESS) without a mask worn correctly.
It makes it feel like those who think the rules don't apply to them are non-stop spouting profanity at one about how little they care about anyone else and how DARE you make them care?!?
I, for one, appreciate NOT having to take six sick days a year for the past nearly two years.
I'll put up with a mask to ensure that I don't have to, and hope my customers would understand that.
I REALLY don't understand the folks who come in emanating fluids from their upper bodily appendage without a mask and then complain because 'no one is helping them' and 'everyone is leaving them alone in the aisles'.
True Story.
I don't blame people for not wanting to work in conditions where they are being treated like garbage for less pay than some prisoners make. If I was going to apply for my job right now as a brand new hire I'd demand at least $10 an hour over what I'm currently making, and cookie cutter the heck out of my schedule so it was weekdays only and nothing past 2pm...
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
What, was there a Ben Shapiro meet-and-greet that just ended next door, or something?
How has that man not been punched in the face at least once by now?