Granted, but you get to kill and butcher the pig, cure the ham, grow and harvest the wheat, mill it, bake the bread, grow the lettuce, farm the hens and collect the eggs, then make the mayonnaise. Oh, and milk the cows to make the cheese. Are you having fun yet?
I wish our infrastructure wasn't crumbling.
Granted, your brother's character is now a T.rex-boar (like an Owlbear but different.) Since he is the only T.rex-boar in the world he can eat however he likes, withou being a cannibal. On the downside, he is a bit lonely.
I wish someone would draw a T.rex-boar
You didn't get Magic Missile as a first level spell, you did get sleep, but not as spell, just à good night's sleep.
I wish I was rich.
Granted! You get the proportional strength of a jellyfish.
I wish I knew everything yet remained sane.
Granted. The Brits take you outside and shoot you.
I wish the Brits would go home to Ol' Blighty again.
Wish granted but now were are talking about the mating habits of the eastern swallow.
I wish I knew the mating habits of all birds.
You get the sheer nothingness of outer space! But it's nice to hear you where doing well before you went there.
I wish I read minds at will.
Granted! Now, whenever anyone wants you to read their minds, you can!
I wish lucky7 would have gotten more of what he wished for.
Granted, you are unable to wish for anything.
I wish the weather at the place I'm going next weekend is good.
(Ps. that actually is a decent superpower.)
Granted; The weather is fantastic, if you're a duck. Permanent downpour is what I'm saying here
I wish I had discovered this thread sooner
Granted, but someone else takes it to an even worse place
I wish I had an obedient pet moose
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Granted: but he is a flatulent moose and you can't stand to be near him and the EPA comes calling for having an illegal pet and takes him away.
I wish I had a new job making more money and better health benefits and working less hours and more vacation time doing some I enjoy and having a good boss and great co-workers.
Granted, however, nothing can come with you, not even your clothes, and if something is already where you want to be you wind up inside it.
I wish to be fluent in all languages currently spoken by mankind.
You are fluent in all, but unable to keep any of them apart.
I wish I could move like jagger.
Granted, but you only get to use it when the blue moon in Sagittarius falls on a Tuesday.
I wish I knew how to give Mr. Snowjade actual, usable Hero Points for being awesome during this whole tonsil thing.
Granted; you are now a great white shark, en route to a pot of shark fin soup.
I wish for steak
Granted. You get idcnlwruuuuuuufosuaejk. I dunno what you want it for, but you do. Maybe you should have thought a bit more about that wish.
I wish for gelatinous cubes to clear my apartment from all the two hordes of smelly otyughs.
Granted. Somewhere in the universe, there is now a Celebrate Menopause day, and nobody gets mood swings or heat flashes.
I wish for better-quality chocolate.
It's great quality chocolate, but it will cost you half your income for a single piece. But you can't resist.. and you lose all your savings, and your house and everything you own. But briljant quality chocolate.
I wish my cruche would like me back.
Granted Mr SnowJade now has Hero Points put into his tonsil. (Not sure how he plans to get them off his tonsil to use them but he has them.
Alas, Mr SnowJade has not had tonsils for...I need several people to take off their shoes so I can count that high. I'll put them in his computer.
Little Skylark: Granted. Your cruche(?) loves your back. He, she, or it cannot get enough of your back, and posts poems in praise of it all over the Internet. Your back becomes famous in literary cafes all over the world.
I wish I could figure out which pattern to use.
You could figure out which pattern to use, if you spend your complete live trying to find out.
I wish I was great at fighting with a samurai sword, and owned one.
Granted! You hear a clockwork-sounding knock on the door, and someone muttering "braaaaaaains..." from outside your apartment.
I wish for a safe way to get rid of my gelatinous cubes without damaging my apartment.
Granted! What suits you pretty constantly appears to be "a little white room with soft walls", though. Fell free to use your newfound ability.
I wish I had a swarm of stirges to chase away the tarrasque from my apartment.
You get a new house, a snail's house, you might fit in if you lost enough weight.
I wish for a very obedient puppy.
Granted! In fact, you actually find yourself on Golarion at 1st level with no gp, no knowledge of any of the languages, and no clothes.
I wish I had eyes as gorgeous as my cat's.
Granted. However, said eyes see nothing.
I wish I could stop time.
Granted. For you. Nobody said anything about you starting it again, of course. So, for the rest of us, you would just disappear.
I wish I could find a travelling circus with big elephants and stuff to entice the stirges out from my apartment.
Granted, but the elephants stampede, and then someone finds out where those stirges came from. It's not pretty.
I wish my stomach would stop growling.