The website is down


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Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

4 people marked this as a favorite.

I didn't do it, I swear!

And the site really is down... unless you're here in the office. Here, we all have access to the site and we're all reading your posts and making snarky replies and laughing at everyone who isn't us because you can't post replies and can't even see our posts in the first place. Ha ha!

Also, having the interweb tubes get all clogged up like this sucks when you're waiting for the test database to finish re-indexing 25,000 products so you can test the upcoming new hotness search code that is super nifty and will completely and totally rock.

Paizo Employee Director of Sales

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Yay! No internet means no customer service threads need lovin!

This means I can just sit back and watch YouTube... oh.

Well, I'll just listen to Pandor... oh.

Right. No biggie. I'll check my Faceboo... DANG IT!

NO PAIZO CHAT?!? NO GOOGLE!?!? NO HULU!?!?!

*goes insane*

Lantern Lodge

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Cosmo wrote:

Yay! No internet means no customer service threads need lovin!

This means I can just sit back and watch YouTube... oh.

Well, I'll just listen to Pandor... oh.

Right. No biggie. I'll check my Faceboo... DANG IT!

NO PAIZO CHAT?!? NO GOOGLE!?!? NO HULU!?!?!

*goes insane*

You know, the email isn't down.... you *could* help me work on answering some of those...

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

Yeah, except the emails are all getting stuck in the clogged intertubes.

Besides, snark is more fun than work.

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

3 people marked this as a favorite.

I hate computers.

Paizo Employee Director of Sales

I'm ok.

I'm ok.

I'm ok.

Spoiler:
NoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadu llboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCos moadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmak esCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointern etmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnoi nternetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubea ndnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyou tubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboy NoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadu llboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCos moadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmak esCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointern etmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnoi nternetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubea ndnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyou tubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboy NoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadu llboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCos moadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmak esCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointern etmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnoi nternetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubea ndnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyou tubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboy NoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadu llboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCos moadullboyNoyoutubeandnointernetmakesCosmoadullboy

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Cosmo wrote:

I'm ok.

I'm ok.

I'm ok....

I can't even rickroll you for that.

Spoiler:
Note to self: When internet returns, make sure to copy important external content such as Rick Astley videos to local server.

Former VP of Finance

On the upside, the Paizo site is running really, really well for me. =D

Former VP of Finance

Cosmo wrote:

Yay! No internet means no customer service threads need lovin!

This means I can just sit back and watch YouTube... oh.

Well, I'll just listen to Pandor... oh.

Right. No biggie. I'll check my Faceboo... DANG IT!

NO PAIZO CHAT?!? NO GOOGLE!?!? NO HULU!?!?!

*goes insane*

/me wonders if Cos has figured out yet that his phone can do all of that for him while he waits for the intertubes to be unclogged.

*edit* - Ok, maybe not Hulu. But I know it can handle the rest of it!

Lantern Lodge

Sara Marie wrote:
Cosmo wrote:

Yay! No internet means no customer service threads need lovin!

This means I can just sit back and watch YouTube... oh.

Well, I'll just listen to Pandor... oh.

Right. No biggie. I'll check my Faceboo... DANG IT!

NO PAIZO CHAT?!? NO GOOGLE!?!? NO HULU!?!?!

*goes insane*

You know, the email isn't down.... you *could* help me work on answering some of those...

Bah Humbug. Looks like I'm an idiot and the emails I thought I sent were make believe. So... never mind.... continue with your previously scheduled insanity....

Paizo Employee Director of Sales

Don't mind if I do...

*gibbers*

Lantern Lodge

On the plus side, I'm designing a flow chart for customers to follow if they think their order is missing.

Step One: Did your order ship?
Yes- Continue
No - "We're sorry but orders cannot arrive at your address until after we ship them."

Lantern Lodge

Step 2: Did it ship to the correct address?
Yes: Continue
No: You might be waiting longer.

Former VP of Finance

Sara Marie wrote:

Step 2: Did it ship to the correct address?

Yes: Continue
No: You might be waiting longer.

Is step 3 "Has customer service told you to wait another week or two yet?"


Have we tried kicking it? I'm pretty sure Vic has the key to the room--can we just let it have one?

Lantern Lodge

Joshua J. Frost wrote:
Have we tried kicking it? I'm pretty sure Vic has the key to the room--can we just let it have one?

no, but you can try kicking cosmo.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

I'M IN YOUR INTERNETS, RAZING YOUR TUBEZ!!!! (nom nom)

Former VP of Finance

Sara Marie wrote:
Joshua J. Frost wrote:
Have we tried kicking it? I'm pretty sure Vic has the key to the room--can we just let it have one?
no, but you can try kicking cosmo.

I endorse this plan.

Lantern Lodge

Chris Self wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:

Step 2: Did it ship to the correct address?

Yes: Continue
No: You might be waiting longer.

Is step 3 "Has customer service told you to wait another week or two yet?"

that is actually further on down the line than step 3.

Step 3: Is it still with the postal service's estimated transit time?
Yes- Please wait
No- Continue


I'LL KICK ANYTHING! MUAHAHAHAHAAH!

*runs upstairs*

Lantern Lodge

Treerazer wrote:
I'M IN YOUR INTERNETS, RAZING YOUR TUBEZ!!!! (nom nom)

James, that isn't a very good disguise.

Ezren wrote:

I'LL KICK ANYTHING! MUAHAHAHAHAAH!

*runs upstairs*

Josh, you almost had me fooled with the hair.


It takes a lot of work to meticulously shave my head into a male pattern baldness shape every morning.

Ask Cosmo. He's my razor-wielder.

Lantern Lodge

Joshua J. Frost wrote:

It takes a lot of work to meticulously shave my head into a male pattern baldness shape every morning.

Ask Cosmo. He's my razor-wielder.

Why would you EVER give Cosmo something that sharp? He's not even allowed to use pens because they are too dangerous for him. (I make him use crayons).


He's an artist with a blade, what can I say?

Lantern Lodge

Joshua J. Frost wrote:
He's an artist with a blade, what can I say?

If by "artist" you mean "butcher"...

Paizo Employee Director of Games

With no one posting, I can finally get caught up on the Playtest Boards...

Nobody fix it... I beg you!

Jason

Paizo Employee Director of Sales

Joshua J. Frost wrote:
He's an artist with a blade, what can I say?

I am!

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

Jason Bulmahn wrote:
Nobody fix it... I beg you!

I'm totally not fixing it even as we speak.

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Cosmo wrote:
Joshua J. Frost wrote:
He's an artist with a blade, what can I say?

I am!

** spoiler omitted **

Not a rickroll:
Explosive Runes
Lantern Lodge

I wonder how many "Hey! Ur Internet is down!!" emails customer service is going to get when we get online again....

Anyone wanna start taking bets?

Lantern Lodge

Gary Teter wrote:
Jason Bulmahn wrote:
Nobody fix it... I beg you!
I'm totally fixing it with my mad mad magic internet skillz even as we speak.

Fixed that for you.

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

top wrote:
Load Avg: 0.00, 0.05, 0.06 CPU usage: 0.5% user, 2.5% sys, 97.0% idle

Now that's a server that needs something to do.

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

Jason Bulmahn wrote:

With no one posting, I can finally get caught up on the Playtest Boards...

Nobody fix it... I beg you!

Jason

Does sitting by the phone waiting for our ISP to give me an update count as "fixing it?"

Paizo Employee Director of Games

Vic Wertz wrote:
Jason Bulmahn wrote:

With no one posting, I can finally get caught up on the Playtest Boards...

Nobody fix it... I beg you!

Jason

Does sitting by the phone waiting for our ISP to give me an update count as "fixing it?"

Yes it does... stop doing that!

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

Hmm.

Lantern Lodge

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Gary Teter wrote:
Hmm.

Three eyed squishy looking orange things usually make the sound "Oooommmm" not "Hmm". I'll go ahead and assume "Hmm" means something bad.

edit:

Gary Teter (PostMonster General), 4 minutes ago removed by Gary Teter

why did you remove your post?

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

Sara Marie wrote:
Three eyed squishy looking orange things...

Until you said that, I had never realized that his avatar is pretty much Blinky, the three-eyed fish from The Simpsons, after a spin in a blender. I'll never see it the same way again.

Former VP of Finance

Jason Bulmahn wrote:
Vic Wertz wrote:
Jason Bulmahn wrote:

With no one posting, I can finally get caught up on the Playtest Boards...

Nobody fix it... I beg you!

Jason

Does sitting by the phone waiting for our ISP to give me an update count as "fixing it?"
Yes it does... stop doing that!

Careful. You might get him proactive.

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

Sara Marie wrote:
why did you remove your post?

I put it back!

Lantern Lodge

Cosmo,
You're lucky Gary said it would be a bad idea to use the banhammer on your account.


I removed a post. Made of wood. In the server room.

Did I kill the interwebs? Did I clog the tubes?

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

3 people marked this as a favorite.

The banhammer should not be wielded lightly. It should only be used with overwhelming force.


Sara Marie wrote:

Cosmo,

You're lucky Gary said it would be a bad idea to use the banhammer on your account.

Oh crap.

*quickly reinstates Cosmo's account*

Lantern Lodge

Joshua J. Frost wrote:

I removed a post. Made of wood. In the server room.

Did I kill the interwebs? Did I clog the tubes?

Sweet! we have some one to pin the blame on.

Spoiler:
Goes to get tar and feathers ready

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

* swings banhammer, smashes toes *

OW!!!

Paizo Employee Director of Sales

Joshua J. Frost wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:

Cosmo,

You're lucky Gary said it would be a bad idea to use the banhammer on your account.

Oh crap.

*quickly reinstates Cosmo's account*

...and this is why we can't have nice things.

Former VP of Finance

Cosmo wrote:
Joshua J. Frost wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:

Cosmo,

You're lucky Gary said it would be a bad idea to use the banhammer on your account.

Oh crap.

*quickly reinstates Cosmo's account*

...and this is why we can't have nice things.

I thought that excluding you was why we *could* have nice things?

Lantern Lodge

Cosmo wrote:
Joshua J. Frost wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:

Cosmo,

You're lucky Gary said it would be a bad idea to use the banhammer on your account.

Oh crap.

*quickly reinstates Cosmo's account*

...and this is why we can't have nice things.

We have me!

Spoiler:
I'm a nice thing aren't I?

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

Cosmo wrote:
...and this is why we can't have nice things.

No, we can have nice things. You can't.


Gary Teter wrote:
Cosmo wrote:
...and this is why we can't have nice things.
No, we can have nice things. You can't.

ZING!

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