Hat melts into creamy peanut butter and jelly, with a dash of holy waster
Augh! It's in my hair, nnnnooooo!
*grumbles and digs a flask of anarchic water out of his coat, dumps it on his head. Residue from the hat's remains washes away, dripping off onto the ceiling as Nurn's hair follows erratically reversed gravity and hangs limply upward*
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SILLY HATS SLAADS ARE FOR PEOPLE
Are we allowed to egg him, or is that too expected?
Eggings are never off the table.
They're never on the table either but that's rather irrelevant, yeeesssss.
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I vote for a preemptive carpet-egging of the entire area's population.
feels like somebody is watching him
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<OBSERVES POTATO SLAAD>
ANALYSIS 85 PERCENT COMPLETE
feels like somebody is watching him
There, there child. No one is watching you. That really is paranoia.
wears his sunglasses at night
Time for an inquisition!
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What a show!
Albeit unexpected.
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YOU WILL BE SEATED IN THE COMFORTABLE FURNITURE
We should have a slaadish inquisition! We could root out anyone that is too lawful!
Huzzah!
*throws intestines*
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*gets out wig* I appoint myself Judge Judy N. Executioner, yeeesssss.
Heretics of Chaos!
Swings staff of lawful striking at the Slaadi
We should have a slaadish inquisition! We could root out anyone that is too lawful!
Huzzah!
*throws intestines*
We do now! Time to make people repent for making too much sense!
Time for an inquisition!
No one expects the Spanish Inquisitor!!!
*eggs Spanish Inquisitor*
How is that for unexpected?
Time for an inquisition!No one expects the Spanish Inquisitor!!!
*throws the book at them*
*ricochets it between the Inquisitor and the Pontiff then reels it back in with a slinky wrapped around his wrist*
Disorder in the court!! Council, approach the bench.
<LOOKS AROUND>
THE BENCH WAS DESTROYED IN THE LATEST FIRE
IT IS BUT ASH
Well grab a handful of it and come here.
AFFIRMATIVE
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Good, now what is the jury's verdict?
Wait I'm the jury. I find the defendant guilty of all charges!
How do you plead, High Pontiff of Canon?
and hurry, I'm getting tired of judging and jurying, I want to get to the executioning.
THE PONTIFF PLAINTIFF IS INNOCENT BY REASON OF SANITY
HE SHALL BE REMANDED TO THE THREAD CELESTIAL
MAY FR1T0 DEITY HAVE MERCY ON HIS SOUL
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Death by turnips it is then, yeeessss. *slams gavel on Potato's hand*
I'll escort the condemned to the upper planes. *tosses them in a burlap sack and drags them up the stairs*
Huzzah!
By the way... Did we ever find out whose intestines I was throwing?
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Wait don't take him to the upper planes yet! I want to test my cool new Bane class feature on him.
His punishment must be more severe!
Oh just follow me up. They don't lock the door up here.
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Torquemada - do not beg him for mercy. Torquemada - do not ask him for forgiveness. Let's face it - you can't Torquemada anything!
Huzzah!
By the way... Did we ever find out whose intestines I was throwing?
I have them.
ties intestines in knots
it's a new prayer I've been wrangling. It's called Cause Multiple Hernias.
Huzzah!
By the way... Did we ever find out whose intestines I was throwing?
I have them.
ties intestines in knots
it's a new prayer I've been wrangling. It's called Cause Multiple Hernias.
*kicks the bag* Quiet in there.
UNIT DESIGNATED HIGH PONTIFF OF CANON HAS BEEN REMANDED TO THE THREAD CELESTIAL
Remand sounds like such a lawful word.
Where did you say you from again, D0R1T0?
THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXI...MAELSTROM
THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXIMAELSTROM. IT IS PLEASINGLY CHAOTIC
UNIT DESIGNATED HIGH PONTIFF OF CANON HAS BEEN REMANDED TO THE THREAD CELESTIAL
Only if the process is lawful...
ponders the meaning of his words then slaps DOR1TO with the holy scepter of lawful reorientation
There. You're subroutines and algorithmic process should align lawfully.., in 2 minutes.
Maybe, if I summon June Cleaver in the name of the All-Canon.
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THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXI...MAELSTROM
THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXIMAELSTROM. IT IS PLEASINGLY CHAOTIC
Ah, I have AxiMaelstrom's last album, Tanar'ri Democracy. It really isn't anywhere near as good as Amuse-Bouche Your Illusionist, Part 1 & 2.
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THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXI...MAELSTROM
THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXIMAELSTROM. IT IS PLEASINGLY CHAOTIC
COMPLIMENT: NICE SAVE, UNIT DESIGNATED D0R1T0
THE SLAAD UNITS REMAIN UNAWARE OF THE AX10MATIC 0RIG1N OF THE D0R1T0 UNITS
Ah, I have AxiMaelstrom's last album, Tanar'ri Democracy. It really isn't anywhere near as good as Amuse-Bouche Your Illusionist, Part 1 & 2.THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXI...MAELSTROM
THIS UNIT HAILS FROM AXIMAELSTROM. IT IS PLEASINGLY CHAOTIC
I got a bit part as the secondary lyrics on track 7, Ygorlogician. That was an interesting recording session, yeeessssss. They signed my other coat when we were done.
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Maybe, if I summon June Cleaver in the name of the All-Canon.
All you have to do is say her name 3 times.
I hear that's why Ward calls out the names of other women in bed.
THIS UNIT'S DATABANKS SHOW THAT THE JUNE CLEAVER PHENOMENON IS MERELY AN URBAN MYTH
THE PROBABILITY OF UNIT DESIGNATED JUNE CLEAVER ARRIVING BY STATING UNIT JUNE CLEAVER'S NAME THRICE IS INFINITESIMAL
I work part-time for Demogorgon and I still don't stick around when she shows up.
*teleports back to Thread Celestial until the ritual is done*
Remember, I didn't say it three times.
Now, where did I put the cheese..?
If you're looking for cheese, try the advice threads. I seem to recall plenty of cheese there last time I looked.
Bleu Cheese Slaad hasn't been here in a while.
UNIT DESIGNATED PONTIFF, THIS UNIT HAS CHEESE FLAVORING YOU MAY ACQUIRE
I like cheese.