I'm a Slaad. I hump just about everything. :-)
Tragic bag of appetites!
Oh, sure. Throw things at me. Just like Chirac did. Except he usually threw garbage.
*from the Abyss* I thought you enjoyed being mistreated. You seem to be smiling when I punt you.
What is this word "enjoy" of which you speak? 'Tie foreign to me.
goes through withdrawal from lack of old French dudes to maul
{knocks on front door} Hello, it iz I, your gnu neyburr with ze outrageouz Frenchie aczent. I would like to borrow zome wine, and zome extra-stinky cheeze, and ze baguette, and put mayonnaize on your Frenchie fries, and hold ze strike on your front porch.
{lets self in} Ah, do not mindz me, I'm zust going zo move into ze living room and help annex it for ze Frenchiest Corgi-lonia.
*Hands Blacque a French flag that has been designed so that the red and blue sections can be removed leaving only the white.*
There, now you have all your bases covered. You can wave the tricolor and surrender at the same time. :-)
It's Humpday!!!!!! Who wants a humping?
Bonjour, Mizter Humpzee! I zink all ze poodlez are pazzed outz from the fumez from my outrageouzly ztinky feet.
On the bright side though, zheir unconzciouznezz meanz I can relax. We Frenchies are alwayz a bit wary of ze bites of ze doggiez. Our naturally zucculent well-marbled flesh tends to be irreziztible to mozt animalz; we are like the Layz potato chipz, no?
Where is zat war criminal? Sumo, it is time for you to face French justice for your crimes! Will you go peacefully or will my men and I have to beat you down. I hope you pick the latter. Vive la France!!!
Beat me down? That's a laugh! You've have to drop your white flags first, you damn cheese-eating surrender monkeys.
DIE! DIE!! DIE!!!
mauls ThuMo
Uh oh, le retreat, RETREAT! {exits, stage right}
Sacre Bleu!!! Run for your lives!!!! *mauled*
You will not beat me you mangy mutt!!! I am ze greatest French warrior of all time and I am Chirac's personal bodyguard. I will k..... *mauled*
*gets the broom and mop* Looks like it's time to clean up the mess.
*Scrounges any leftover cheese and wine that looks like it might still be edible and wanders off to another thread.*
TCFIF!
waits for the other shoe to drop
AAAAAAAARRRRROOOOOOOO!!!!!!
*Throws a shoe at CDP.*
Nobody loves me.
Everybody hates me.
Nobody loves me.
Everybody hates me.
*From the Abyss* I love to punt you. Does that count for something?
Please, you can't fool me into believing anything I'm part of can bring happiness.
CDP, I'm sure there are people out there who would love you and invite you into their homes for dinner.
*Hands CDP a one way plane ticket to Korea.*
Please, you can't fool me into believing anything I'm part of can bring happiness.
*From the abyss* You have no idea how much joy it brings to my heart to see you punted into orbit. In fact, I'll show you tomorrow if you want.
Please, you can't fool me into believing anything I'm part of can bring happiness.*From the abyss* You have no idea how much joy it brings to my heart to see you punted into orbit. In fact, I'll show you tomorrow if you want.
Hey, if you punt him to Korea I can get a refund on that plane ticket.
Sure, kick a poodle while he's down. Story of my life.
Sure, kick a poodle while he's down. Story of my life.
Speaking of kicks...... *punt* See how happy that made me?
Oh sure, get happy. Everyone else does. Just not me.
nope. not me.....
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I'm impressed that this place still gets posts! Or maybe not that impressed
*chases own tail*
{drunkenly floats to the ground, looks around approvingly at CDP's landmine patch}
Yes, little CDP has worked hard to make this small patch with much love and even more digested-Frenchies fiber. And all year long, he was always happy to share it with his poodle friends. Once again, I judge this the .
{works quickly: 1) filling a large hollow Hungry Jack-O' Lantern-piñata with squeaky toys, jerky treats, and a jar of fiber supplements, b) leaves a special baggie with all of CDP's best meds and sets it gently next to the sleeping poodle's head, and Π), empties a bag of choice bits of different metals for Rusty.}
{Finally, with his work done, he nods approvingly before disappearing in a spicy sulfurous poof of flatulence}
{reappears suddenly} Oops, almost forgot... {reaches into magical colostomy bag and pulls of life-sized stuffed poodle filled with explosives and a rune of dismissal to ensnare The Monday Monster}
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He came! The Greeat Landmine came! And we all slept through it!
piddles
drops a landmine
All hail Chrirac! Vive la France!
Whatever. It doesn't matter anymore. Nothing does.......
Whatever. It doesn't matter anymore. Nothing does.......
Ah, another stupid American with his spirit broken. Good to see.
Friday. One day closer to Monday.
Friday. One day closer to Monday.
Guess what? Iiiiiiiiit's Monday!!!! *punts CDP* Mondays are so awesome!!!!
Now me! Now me!
Now me! Now me!
Dang it. It's Tuesday now. Don't worry, Snarky. I'll remember to punt you next Monday.
I was remembered once......
You're alway remembered on hump day!!!
Now me! Now me!Dang it. It's Tuesday now. Don't worry, Snarky. I'll remember to punt you next Monday.
Also... This did not occur.
MoMo needs a better day planner to remember his appointments.
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I had a day planner once....it was blank.
Oh great. I just realized what day tomorrow is. And here I was having only a horrible day.