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Inspired by Taliesin Hoyle’s post:
One of my ancestors was a convict on the First Fleet. Convicted for theft in merry old England and sentenced to Transportation. Was later pardoned by Governor Macquarie and granted a small plot of land in Balmain. False. You know this sounds plausible, so red herringed it.
One of my ancestors was a Spanish monk. Joined the order to come to Australia, then skipped the monastery when he got here and knocked up a local girl. True. It is the sort of story that gets kept by a family.
One of my ancestors was a fighter pilot in the RAF during World War 2. Shot down at least two german planes.True? I had two uncles die as combatants in the war. I also lost eleven to the camps. (This is not an entry in the game.)
One of my ancestors was a sailor in his youth – quit his job at age twenty and left on a round the world sailing trip on a small yacht with two other guys. False. Small yachts are hell with other people.
One of my ancestors was a camel man on the doomed Burke and Wills expedition. He died (or was possibly killed) at Lake Massacre. True.
Which are true, which are false?
1. Yep, you got it, red herring, false.
2. True, and indeed the story is well remembered and well loved by the family.3. False, but with a grain of truth. My grandfather was a mechanic with the RAF during the last year of the war, and became good friends with the pilot in the story.
4. True, this was actually my father. And yes, it was hell at times I understand.
5. False. Looked it up on wikipedia to get some authentic sounding details.
You got me it's all true!
ahem.
errr... nobody replied.
Probably true, you were in the military.... and not bad...
I once knew a guy who could do 1000 pushups, infantry, and that's no lie.
One handers? I used to do ten at a count, five sets, three times a week.
How about 50 consecutive chin-ups. Do you believe that?
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Probably true, you were in the military.... and not bad...
I once knew a guy who could do 1000 pushups, infantry, and that's no lie.
One handers? I used to do ten at a count, five sets, three times a week.
How about 50 consecutive chin-ups. Do you believe that?
I got up to 15 or 20 chinups.
All true.
So I have to ask ... why? For both of thoseYou got me it's all true!
ahem.
errr... nobody replied.
Both of them are veterinarians. My brother was taking a semen sample from a bull. See ELECTRO-JAC.
Likewise for the dog masturbator, except he jerked the dogs off instead of running voltage through the prostate. I guess the dogs really liked him.
After Kruelaids revelation I' never going to complain about my cr***y summer bar job again.
True or false:
I have never accidentally gotten in to a fight with an Inuit over a penguin.
After Kruelaids revelation I' never going to complain about my cr***y summer bar job again.
True or false:
I have never accidentally gotten in to a fight with an Inuit over a penguin.
False. You did get in a fight. I got seriously flamed by an Inuit after making a joke that supposed penguins live in the north (it was a koke, i knew where they live) but he didn't think it was funny because it was inaccurate. It could have become a fight.
True strangely enough.
It sounds like a disturbingly similiar situation. In all honesty I was being a complete jerk about Inuits but I had no reason to believe there was one within earshot. Living in South London I had never seen an actual inuit before and have never seen one since. Sods law that the one time I make highly innapropriate jokes about Inuits the only one I have ever seen decides to pick a fight with me over it.
Lesson learned always watch for a man in a sealskin coat.
Truth or Lie?
I beat a Nobel Prize winner at a game of chess. And, when the outcome became apparent he slammed down the knight he was twiddling around in his hand on the table, and exclaimed, "S$+%! I hate that!"
Decisions, decision: flatter Tenser or lay in the cut.... hmmmm.
(a) True, he may have been brilliant but his chess was rusty.
or
(b) Lie, he kicked your ass. You wish you won.
hmmmmmm.
I'll take (b) for 100 Alex.
Five of these are true:
I once joined the circus of horrors and hammered nails through my tongue.
I once sky dived dressed as Tweetie pie for charity.
Last week I spent all of Saturday having sex with a bear.
I once got into a fight in a 7/11 while dressed in drag and won.
I was once in an explosion and lost my eyebrows, fringe and some skin while wearing a shell suit -nearly burning to death.
I can recite the entire script of Aliens perfectly and do the sound effects.
I have spent time living on the streets of a strange city, penniless and hundreds of miles away from home.
I have a unicycle and can juggle whist riding it.
My mate does one of the voices in the new GTA4 game.
I was in the army for six years and left because I wanted to become an actor.
How's it prepared? And are there certain types to be eaten or not eaten?
I'm in the midst of a pbp where peat bogs figure prominently...
I'm sorry but I couldn't tell you, they kept in by the fire place in a big heap and also used it for fuel. I think it was straight out of the ground -I remember my Aunt and Grandmother telling me not to eat too much.
Five of these are true:
I once joined the circus of horrors and hammered nails through my tongue.
FalseI once sky dived dressed as Tweetie pie for charity.
TrueLast week I spent all of Saturday having sex with a bear.
TrueI once got into a fight in a 7/11 while dressed in drag and won.
TrueI was once in an explosion and lost my eyebrows, fringe and some skin while wearing a shell suit -nearly burning to death.
FalseI can recite the entire script of Aliens perfectly and do the sound effects.
FalseI have spent time living on the streets of a strange city, penniless and hundreds of miles away from home.
TrueI have a unicycle and can juggle whist riding it.
FalseMy mate does one of the voices in the new GTA4 game.
TrueI was in the army for six years and left because I wanted to become an actor.
False
lol--never fight nobody in drag. No matter what happens, it never looks good.
*Ahem*
Tell that to Lord Fanny darling...
I'd like to think I was channeling her that day. ;)
Five of these are true:
I once joined the circus of horrors and hammered nails through my tongue.
FalseI once sky dived dressed as Tweetie pie for charity.
TrueLast week I spent all of Saturday having sex with a bear.
TrueI once got into a fight in a 7/11 while dressed in drag and won.
TrueI was once in an explosion and lost my eyebrows, fringe and some skin while wearing a shell suit -nearly burning to death.
FalseI can recite the entire script of Aliens perfectly and do the sound effects.
FalseI have spent time living on the streets of a strange city, penniless and hundreds of miles away from home.
TrueI have a unicycle and can juggle whist riding it.
FalseMy mate does one of the voices in the new GTA4 game.
TrueI was in the army for six years and left because I wanted to become an actor.
False
Quite close...
Five of these are true:
I once joined the circus of horrors and hammered nails through my tongue.
FalseI once sky dived dressed as Tweetie pie for charity.
FalseLast week I spent all of Saturday having sex with a bear.
TrueI once got into a fight in a 7/11 while dressed in drag and won.
TrueI was once in an explosion and lost my eyebrows, fringe and some skin while wearing a shell suit -nearly burning to death.
TrueI can recite the entire script of Aliens perfectly and do the sound effects.
False (pretty damn close though)I have spent time living on the streets of a strange city, penniless and hundreds of miles away from home.
True (one of the most eye opening experiences of my life)I have a unicycle and can juggle whist riding it.
FalseMy mate does one of the voices in the new GTA4 game.
TrueI was in the army for six years and left because I wanted to become an actor.
False
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lol--never fight nobody in drag. No matter what happens, it never looks good.
*Ahem*
Tell that to Lord Fanny darling...
I think he meant it never looks good for a bloke to be seen fighting a guy in drag...win or lose; it's just baaad!
I'd like to think I was channeling her that day. ;)
!Photo evidence?
I guess I shouldn't ask, but...I seriously hope that reference to a 'bear' was in the slang sense of the term, and not genus Ursus? I doubt the RSPCA would approve.
What if the bear started it?
Do you think the bear was bare naked? Maybe the poster barely got through the experience. Perhaps the bear barely got through the experience. Or the posters partner was in a bear of a mood. Maybe they were on a bear rug. Perhaps they were barely naked on a bear rug while the posters partner was in a bear of a mood and therefore the poster barely made it through the moment.
While lying on a bear rug, the poster had sex with a barely naked bear who was a bear of a mood and the bear had to grin and bare it because they barely survived the posters passion of pleasures.
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Do you think the bear was bare naked? Maybe the poster barely got through the experience. Perhaps the bear barely got through the experience. Or the posters partner was in a bear of a mood. Maybe they were on a bear rug. Perhaps they were barely naked on a bear rug while the posters partner was in a bear of a mood and therefore the poster barely made it through the moment.
While lying on a bear rug, the poster had sex with a barely naked bear who was a bear of a mood and the bear had to grin and bare it because they barely survived the posters passion of pleasures.
All lies!
All lies!Do you think the bear was bare naked? Maybe the poster barely got through the experience. Perhaps the bear barely got through the experience. Or the posters partner was in a bear of a mood. Maybe they were on a bear rug. Perhaps they were barely naked on a bear rug while the posters partner was in a bear of a mood and therefore the poster barely made it through the moment.
While lying on a bear rug, the poster had sex with a barely naked bear who was a bear of a mood and the bear had to grin and bare it because they barely survived the posters passion of pleasures.
How do you know? Were YOU on the bear rug experiencing the passions of pleasure?
So:
I saw the Lord of the Rings movies a perfect 6, 6, and 6 each times in theatre.
I got a perfect 1600 on the SAT's.
I haven't ever owned a car.
Naah....I was just scratching my butt on the rug.
Your suppose to scratch your ears or get someone to do it for you. Sigh, confused mutt!
So:
I saw the Lord of the Rings movies a perfect 6, 6, and 6 each times in theatre.
I got a perfect 1600 on the SAT's.
I haven't ever owned a car.
I'll give you true on the movies, I over indulged myself, though not to that extent. I think I did 3,2,1.
I'll say false to the SAT score.
I'll say true to the car. I got my first one rather late in the game as well. Walked everywhere.
So:
I saw the Lord of the Rings movies a perfect 6, 6, and 6 each times in theatre.
I got a perfect 1600 on the SAT's.
I haven't ever owned a car.
I'll give you true on the movies, I over indulged myself, though not to that extent. I think I did 3,2,1.
I'll say false to the SAT score.
I'll say true to the car. I got my first one rather late in the game as well. Walked everywhere.
Actually False (I went 6,3,6 actually), True on SAT score, and right, true on the car - no license yet even.
Actually False (I went 6,3,6 actually), True on SAT score, and right, true on the car - no license yet even.So:
I saw the Lord of the Rings movies a perfect 6, 6, and 6 each times in theatre.
I got a perfect 1600 on the SAT's.
I haven't ever owned a car.
I'll give you true on the movies, I over indulged myself, though not to that extent. I think I did 3,2,1.
I'll say false to the SAT score.
I'll say true to the car. I got my first one rather late in the game as well. Walked everywhere.
Hmmm... 3 out of 1, not very good. I guess I'll have to step up my game.
I can quote the Spam Story from memory; the bit from Monty Python hehe and try to do all the voices; truth or lie?
shuddup you damn vikings! hehe is my avatar spam; who knows....
ok; just reread the rules; so forget that top part and go with this in story format; when playing WOW; and someone complains or uses the word SPAM on any of the formats like trade or general; I start quoteing line for line the entire bit of the SPAM bit from Monty Python to the growns, cheers or chargin of other players. Truth or Lie.
I can quote the Spam Story from memory; the bit from Monty Python hehe and try to do all the voices; truth or lie?
shuddup you damn vikings! hehe is my avatar spam; who knows....
ok; just reread the rules; so forget that top part and go with this in story format; when playing WOW; and someone complains or uses the word SPAM on any of the formats like trade or general; I start quoteing line for line the entire bit of the SPAM bit from Monty Python to the growns, cheers or chargin of other players. Truth or Lie.
Lie, because I don't know the spam story, and I am smarter than you...so there!
I don't know the spam story, and I am smarter than you...so there!
You lie on both counts.
You lie on both counts.
I don't know the spam story, and I am smarter than you...so there!
But....But....But....I was just answering Valegrim's Truth or Lie tales. And I am too smarter than he is, every Tuesday at 4:03 p.m.
lol--never fight nobody in drag. No matter what happens, it never looks good.*Ahem*
Tell that to Lord Fanny darling...
I think he meant it never looks good for a bloke to be seen fighting a guy in drag...win or lose; it's just baaad!
I'd like to think I was channeling her that day. ;)!Photo evidence?
I guess I shouldn't ask, but...I seriously hope that reference to a 'bear' was in the slang sense of the term, and not genus Ursus? I doubt the RSPCA would approve.
Photo evidence?! -It was the mid-nineties and cameras/photos everything would be very... blurry/shaky.
as for the bear thing -RSPCA?! :D It's ok! he's well over the age of consent, can drive, vote, has opposable thumbs and everything -although truth be told -a collar and leash does come in handy at times what with the biting and all. ;)
What if the bear started it?Do you think the bear was bare naked? Maybe the poster barely got through the experience. Perhaps the bear barely got through the experience. Or the posters partner was in a bear of a mood. Maybe they were on a bear rug. Perhaps they were barely naked on a bear rug while the posters partner was in a bear of a mood and therefore the poster barely made it through the moment.
While lying on a bear rug, the poster had sex with a barely naked bear who was a bear of a mood and the bear had to grin and bare it because they barely survived the posters passion of pleasures.
Don't bare thinkin about?
Hey Boo Boo, do ya think the bare bear stole a picinic basket? Or do you think he's barely smarter than the average bear?
This is a weird place.
This is a weird place.
You've barely scratched the surface! I suspect it will get a lot weirder.
well; its a lie that I can do it by memory; least at the moment; but is true that when anyone started complaining aobut spam on the wow channel I would type in the whole skit; it is in my Spam cookbook;
now new one; did I have a fan following and SPAM cheering section; true or lie; I say I did
hehe well now; true or lie; I love to take hot baths in rose petals?
as fer smarter then me; well now; you can look into the future; but I have a long long memory jsut look how my avatar can ponder hehe; yours just looks all cute, cuddly and innocent.
hehe well now; true or lie; I love to take hot baths in rose petals?
as fer smarter then me; well now; you can look into the future; but I have a long long memory jsut look how my avatar can ponder hehe; yours just looks all cute, cuddly and innocent.
I would say false, because that's me your talking about. Steaming hot water, a touch of baby oil, candles, soft music, lots of rose petals and someone to dry me off.
I only claimed I was smarter on Tuesday's at 4:03 p.m. That leaves an aweful lot of time in the week for you to be smarter. Yes your avatar appears to "ponder" on the other hand he just might be holding up the wall. As for my avatar, I didn't know I look cuddly, as for innocent....well "Smack!"
I have such nice fingernails.
My wife thinks they look manicured, but they're not.
No, I don't think your nails are manicured. If they are, I think I would be worried. Although it is entirely possible that your tail is frequently brushed.
I never brush my tail.
My hair is nacherly perfect; hence the Warren Zevon song.
Why don't you brush your tail? I think it would look a lot nicer. You know this whole thing about bushy tails is a myth right? Sleek and brushed is in these days Heath. Heck, I even know this druid who's wolf beads his tail, and another one colors his. Perhaps you should go for a new look.
Who's this Warren Zevon you speak of?
I never brush my tail.
My hair is nacherly perfect; hence the Warren Zevon song.Why don't you brush your tail? I think it would look a lot nicer. You know this whole thing about bushy tails is a myth right? Sleek and brushed is in these days Heath. Heck, I even know this druid who's wolf beads his tail, and another one colors his. Perhaps you should go for a new look.
Who's this Warren Zevon you speak of?
Heathy should go for a look like this... geektastic and rather chic. ;)
Heathy should go for a look like this... geektastic and rather chic. ;)
Very impressive. I agree. It also fits his snippy attitude as well. How about it Heath, ready for a makeover? Would you like me to schedule an appointment for you?