Someone died? Better drink my own p***
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You can use urine streams to put out a campfire, but that seems like a waste to me.
Don't worry, I'll brew tonight... *passes out Yellow Gatorade*
Sweet! Free protein!
Wasting eggs? Better drink my own pee.
I don't know, but I posit that I better drink my own pee.
Applesauce? Better drink my own pee.
Invade Canada? Better drink my own piss.
piddles on the carpet*sniffs fresh puddle* Share the wealth!!
*drinks his own pee* I'd share, but it's freshest this time of the morning.
Mmm, asparagus.
*Pees in Spicy Nacho's mouth*
Birds? Better drink my own piss.
Same avatar? Better drink my own p^$$
Relinking? Better drink my own piss.
Poodles? Better drink my own piss.
Ignorance? Better drink my own piss.
Top of the page? Better drink my own piss.
People not feeling good? Better drink my own piss.
Egging people? Better drink my own piss.
I've learned that cats with diarrhea never go in the litter box. They go everywhere else instead. X_XI think it's been a while since I dried out like this. It feels good. I think I was getting swamp foot. No, I'm full. Can you top off my glass though? A little extra foam'd be nice, this time.
Crab juice or mountain dew. Ew, bleh, barf. I'll take a crab juice.
Yub yub!
*makes a homemade moonshine enema from a piece of hose, a plastic bottle, and a bit of string* What? It gets in the system quicker like this!
I'm going to teach you what you need to survive in the dangerous wild of the Paizo messageboard. Rule number one: Don't feed the Trolls.
AaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaOoooooooooooooooooooooooo!!! *runs through thread naked with a makeshift spear*
Ya wants we should take cara da problem??Dealing with a spot of interpersonal conflict with the newest member of our gaming group, and I'm uncertain of the outcome. Confrontation always makes me anxious. I know a great way to build effigies taught to me by pacific islanders. They stomped and beat that thing all night before setting it on fire, using a technique I'd never seen before. And they did it all in my honor! What amazing folks they are, even after I stole a bunch of their crops to survive.
You know what I feel like doing today? Lets go mock an old guy. Hey, those kids beat us to it! Maul them, maul them all!I'm a bad motherf#@ker! Hey old guy! We mauled those little p*@@ants for you!
I'd still eat it.
I'll kill it for $50, stuff it for $70, and eat it for FREE!
Staying regular can keep you free of up to 4.5 kilograms of waste, which can come in really handy when you're jumping out of helicopters into the jungle. I highly advise a diet including bran... and some Sanka.
Makes an obscene motion with a carrot. Deep tissue itch, huh? That's not the most efficient way to eat a carrot, but you'll at least absorb the moisture without triggering your gag reflex!
Drinks out of the toilet. I drank out of a toilet once. I swear it was for survival reasons! Yes, I understand the toilet was in that McDonald's truck stop...
*waves the bear trap and CJ*
Ah hope ya git it. Thet's a fahn Christmas present. Ah'm hopin' fer a new bahr trap. Dadgum hippehs dun ruint muh old wun. Whut'r yew askin' fer AZ?I'm pretty sure it's an international crime to leave me in this thing. My producers are going to hear about this! *wishes it was clamped on leg and not elsewhere*
Who hasn't? I mean, hope you find it soon!
Ah hope ya git it. Thet's a fahn Christmas present. Ah'm hopin' fer a new bahr trap. Dadgum hippehs dun ruint muh old wun. Whut'r yew askin' fer AZ? I'm pretty sure it's an international crime to leave me in this thing. My producers are going to hear about this!
*whispers to camera guy* Now if I can just catch one of these poodles, I should have enough protein to sustain me through hibernation this winter. You should never try to catch a poodle though unless you're very hungry, they're rife with disease. Make sure when you cook them you scorch off all the hair and gut them properly or else you could end up with dysentery, scabies, or worse. *creeps forward slowly*
*gulp* It's packed full of protein! For some reason, I can't seem to get enough of these though.
Anybody seen where I dropped those rocky mountain oysters? I'm a might peckish.
You should be able to gain enough calories to make it through a day in the office by just licking stamps and not putting them on envelopes. Now watch me do something stupid in the name of survival! *leaps off cliff*
To treat a gunshot wound properly, always remember to stick your finger in first... *Howls in pain* Then twist... *Howls even louder* What? Can't a guy get a little privacy?
You should never store your bullets near an open flame, whenever you build a campfire (using methods such as magnesium bricks that normal people aren't carrying) make sure to keep your ammunition as far away from the fire as possible. Plus, real men eat everything raw. I learned that in Special Forces, because I'm special.
Blimey! Some cockney'd cajun abberation has provided me with a vapouros drink of questionable calibre! This is only three x's! In the hills of Wales we drink only four x's or better! You should put more spruce in the next batch, give you more vih-tamin see. It'll freshin' yer drink guvnah. Oy, whats happenen to me wordage? I done am addled uhgin.
*regains composure* I don't know what came over me. Does anyone have any sheep eyes or nearly hatched eggs to eat, i'm feeling really awful. Oh, is that a raw crawdad? I'll eat anything raw.
Well, I do need to get some calories that I lost yesterday jumping into icy pools bare naked, and I hate to waste any part of those filthy hippies... hippies... HIPPEHS! *howls like a wolf* meh accent, it dun gun all wonky! I R sposed to be Welsh!
*Walks out of the woods with a camera crew in tow* ...Watch your step, it seems that there are lots of wild hogs around these parts... er... no that's not hog droppings. *Ponders for a moment* Why does this place seem so familiar? Have we already been to this place on Goblinoid versus Civilization? |