Lazily flapping his bat-shaped wings, Sir Batman watch the visual display offered by Sylva, the dying centaur, and the dying centaur 's blood, virus, and lunch waterfalling over, into, around the rogue.
I heard that one should not go chasing waterfalls, Sylva.
The bat floats down away from the puddle of mudd...err...centaur . He graciously accepts the minitrations of Sylva.
Thank you!
Standing and stretching, Sir Batman exchanges shields. He smiles to the group.
Which way?
Sylva tries to play off of Sir Batman’s humor as a coping mechanism. The waterfall chased me, she thinks. But the part of her who hates herself for joking at a moment like this does the talking. “Waterfalls aren’t red.”
Sylva’s healing hand is no less precise than her killing hand, her methodical mind no less a stranger to one’s inner anatomy and what to do with it.
This is how she started. A fluke. A deserving foe. And then what? Will I learn to love it? Will I become the very thing I ha… ‘hate?’ Did I hate her? How else could I have possi—
“You’re welcome.”
Sylva packs her tools without looking anyone in the eye.
You proceed through the west door. Ten framed paintings line the western side of this long corridor. Each painting glows softly as the depicted figures silently move again and again through short, repeating scenes. Anothet door exits to the north.
The paintings each depict a different moment from Kaneepo the Slim's long life. The first portrays Kaneepo awakening in a dark, mossy bower on the First World, and the second shows Kaneepo kneeling before a massive cloaked fey of chaotic darkness. Disturbingly, the final painting in the series shows you yourselves during your encounter with the Oakstewards at the Seventh Arch. In the scene’s background, Kaneepo watches from the trees with their trademark silent grin.
Studying the paintings, you are able to ascertain Kaneepo's backstory:
The First World is a primal cauldron of spontaneous creation and experimental evolution. From the beginning, the First World has churned out inexplicable creatures that defy mortal logic. Kaneepo the Slim is one such entity.
The fey trickster called Kaneepo woke, fully formed, thousands of years ago in the shadowy realm of Nighthold. Kaneepo initially struggled with their identity, bereft of any kin after which to model themself. Years of mingling with other fey eventually suggested kinship with bogeys and bogeymen, given their similarly slender forms and unsettling appetites. Yet the match was far from perfect: unlike the stronger bogeymen who feed on souls and fear, Kaneepo was drawn to victims' shadows and felt compelled to drink their umbral auras. Disgusted by the shadow drinker's “perversion” and threatened by the idea that Kaneepo might represent the future of their kind, the other bogeys shunned Kaneepo.
Kaneepo then sought shelter in the court of Count Ranalc, Eldest of shadows and chaos. Yet they still felt eternally alone. As their loneliness curdled to resentment, Kaneepo began to see themself as the progenitor of a new fey race, destined to rule a realm of their own. The only question was how.
One day, while wandering the wild shadow forests of Nighthold, Kaneepo came upon the gnawed corpse of a human bearing a strange carved leaf. Tracing the human's trail, Kaneepo found a curious stone arch and passed through it, using the carved leaf as the gate's key. They emerged into the forest known today as the Wilewood. Kaneepo immediately recognized the opportunity for what it was and swiftly set about hunting the area's elves, glutting themself on unprotected elven shadows. They began kidnapping elves who caught their fancy and experimented on each one with rituals designed to evolve them into a creature just like Kaneepo. But all these experiments failed, each ritual killing its victim. Unfortunately for Kaneepo, this was long before Earthfall, at the height of elven power. Soon, a group of elven heroes banded together to stop the fey menace. They hauled Kaneepo back through the Seventh Arch to the First World, where they imprisoned the vile trickster inside the stump of a vast tree. The adventurers took the arch's gate key with them to ensure Kaneepo would be stranded.
And there Kaneepo sat as millennia passed. The First World is nothing if not tumultuous, and Nighthold is among its most mutable regions. In time, the fexing of the planar fabric broke the lock on Kaneepo's prison. Kaneepo was pleasantly surprised to discover that their stump prison had served as a cocoon, allowing them time to come into their full power. Kaneepo no longer had the Seventh Arch's gate key, but an age of primal metamorphosis had given them the power to shape the little patch of First World around their tree stump. Through this shaping power, Kaneepo created breaches that connected to the Material Plane. Freed and flled with zeal, the vengeful fey dedicated themself to seeking revenge against their elven persecutors. Kaneepo developed the perfect apocalyptic weapon which harnessed the magic of the Seventh Arch: the obnubilate curse.
Their victory was cut short, however. While Kaneepo was locked away, Earthfall had sent most elves feeing to distant Sovyrian. Kaneepo was dismayed to realize that their perfect weapon, crafted specifcally to affict elves, targeted a population that was already in decline. Despondent, Kaneepo retreated to the First World, back into the patch of shadow-forest they controlled, an area now known as the Thinlands. Over the centuries that followed, Kaneepo hunted the other humanoids who dwelled near the Wilewood and gradually resumed their attempts to create more of their kind. When elves fnally returned to Golarion, Kaneepo was pleased to discover that the obnubilate curse still worked, though it didn't spread nearly so far as they'd hoped. Heartened but still afraid of drawing attention, the fey began slowly increasing their hunting, recruiting the local gorgas into their quest. When the Missing Moment dispelled the obnubilate curse, Kaneepo was furious. To devise a new means of destroying elves, Kaneepo searched for a way to get the Seventh Arch's gate key from the Oakstewards. In the course of this search, Kaneepo ran across Bolan and found him ripe for manipulation. With the rebel Oaksteward now under their thumb, Kaneepo's ambitions have expanded to something far grander than a simple curse. Now, they aim to extend the Thinlands into the Material Plane itself, turning Sevenarches into their own private hunting preserve.
Studying the final painting in the series that shows the group during the encounter with the Oakstewards at the Seventh Arch, Sir Batman stares at the scene’s background, Kaneepo watches from the trees with their trademark silent grin, Sir Batman's blue eye narrow at the image.
My profile looks off. Wish he positioned himself on my left.
The Champion of Mazludeh then follows along with the story being told about Kaneepo the Slim's Origins and rise to evil.
We may have our work cut out for us. It seems that The Real Slim Shady can manipulate this area, the Thinlands, by force of will.
The bronze-colored sprite grins.
Ravenna, can you take a few minutes to repair my other shield, please? I've a feeling that I may need both at full strength.
The sprite will keep watch, as they wait.
Sylva studies the paintings, pausing at the last one, watching the scenes repeat several times.
Dwarf. Spider… Bolan’s teeth… dwarf. Spider… the fey flee. We did not kill them. We did not kill the little leshies. Dwarf. Spider. Dwarf. Spider. Dwarf. Dwarf. Dwarf…
She makes it a point to shift her focus to the first nine, piecing together the story.
“Are you watching now, Kaneepo? We will not imprison you like those stupid elves. You will die. You will die on the Mortal Plane. You will be at the mercy of gods, none of whom will want you, not even the most vile. Because without mortals to manipulate, the evil gods will die.
“So for you, death is the end. That horsegirl could be prancing about in some afterlife with that dwarf on her back, or consumed by devils. I don’t care one way or the other.
“But you… you will cease to be. And I’ll get my share of the reward for ending you. But it’s not for the money.”
Sylva moves to the next door and waits. Her hands were shaking when she entered this room. Now she remains covered in the stench of her disemboweled foe, but her blades are held steadily. Sylva is ready to kill all of Kaneepo’s followers.
Ravenna, concerned for her friend's well-being, finds herself unable to concentrate on the task of repairing Batman's shield. She nearly breaks the tiny thing in half in a moment of inattention, but finally manages to refocus enough to make it good as new.
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Sir Batman watches warily waiting while Ravenna repairs....
Ummmm....
The bronze-colored sprite relaxing retirement-style rewarded with her wistful second wind-up....
Mazludeh save us!
Seemingly sliding into a slippery slop of sobs and stress, the Champion of Mazludeh winks at the Gunslinger's success!
Never doubted you for more than 20 minutes!
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Nox strides through the hall slowly examining each painting like one at an art museum would with various oh's and um's included. Slowly piecing together an idea of Kaneepo's story he looks to the others while standing next to the final painting.
"I see, now we know the source of the curse and of it's purpose. But what of the being that dispelled it, an even more powerful fey perhaps?"
Looking to Sylva with a look of concern Nox pat's his friend on the bloody shoulder, before realizing it and quickly wiping his hand on the oaken wall. "Be careful Sylva, we are dealing with an ancient fey. Who knows what he may be capable of... such cruelty born of loneliness and hatred."
Offering a nod, "Mind that you don't lose yourself to those emotions."
The friendly Corgi brought up the rear tail curled between it's stubby legs as they delved further into the spooky mansion of Kaneepo.
Jars of pigment and canvases in the process of being stretched line the walls of this artist’s studio. An easel with a half-finished painting stands in the center of the room, and a nest of blankets occupies the western wall. A door leads to the east.
The half‑finished painting shows Kaneepo sitting on a leafy wooden throne, while the sketched‑in forms of dying elves writhe in agony at the Slim’s feet.
A strange creature works on the painting here. Standing 7 feet in height, the being has four arms, two legs, and a termite-like abdomen. Her otherwise dull brown carapace is decorated with numerous runes glowing in bright colors.
She turns when she hears the door open, buzzing angrily! "I will not let you defile my masterpieces!" she says in a telepathic voice.
The creature moves closer before causing the runes on her body to flare with intense colorful light!
Success: The creature is dazzled for 1 round.
Failure: The creature is dazzled for 1 minute.
Critical Failure: The creature is blinded for 1 round and dazzled for 1 minute.
“No harm will come to your painting. Surrender faster than we can kill you, and you may live to paint Kaneepo’s death at our hands.”
She waits for Sir Bat to join her in flank position.
When the blades inevitably fly, she does NOT aim for a painting.
Sir Batman leads the way through the Northern door. The bronze-colored bat holding his newly (and much appreciated) repaired shield in front.
Viewing all the painter's implementations spread out in the studio, Sir Batman nods.
I wanted to make a suggestion about my profile?
At the sudden burst of mental rudeness, the Champion of Mazludeh decides to become a cynic!
Raising his shield, placing both hands on it, Sir Batman Strides into a Flank with Sylva!
Sylva! It's the critics choice awards!
At the burst of of colorful lights, the Batman screams!
Blinded by the light!
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Wandering into the room Nox was about to compliment the style of work before they were interrupted with a flashing pa-ting. The world whirled in colors that were too bright and Nox heard a whining in the air, had he gone deaf, or was the Corgi behind him simply whining in fear of the panic inducing painter. Regardless he swatted at the air as he walked into the room.
"We just want to end Kaneepo's terror enough with the killing and dying please!"
He tripped on some art supplies and caused one of the paintbrushes to go flying hap-hazardly and at quite great velocity at the painter's face.
Blinking furiously to try and clear the afterimages from her eyes, Ravenna stumbles forward to the doorway, snapping off a shot as she moves. "Why are even the painters trying to kill us?"
Ravenna shoots the creature, her bullet piercing the being's carapace. As she reloads, she the gunslinger fails to recall what it could be. Sylva moves in and stabs her blade into the being's leg, and Nox manages to pierce her carapace with a hurled paintbrush.
The creature is wounded, but now she is angry as well. She raises two of her claws and brings them down at the same time at Sylva, slicing deeply into the rogue! As Sylva falls, the being turns to Batman, but he avoids her follow-up attacks.
Sylva has no witty retort. Only instinct! Sylva leaves her blades on the ground and kicks the killer artist!
A powerful healing spell from Nox rouses Sylva. She kicks at the artist's legs, the first blow twisting the creature's leg at an awkward angle, and the second one fulling dislocating it! She chitters in agony and falls to her knees, crying for mercy in your minds.
"Please! Spare my life, I beg you! I am merely the Chronicler! I was here only to capture a historic moment in my art! I will tell you all I know of Kaneepo the Slim!"
Sylva picks up her blades, and sheathes one as a signal to the others.
“I don’t want to kill you. I don’t want to kill anyone. But you better do more than just give us information. I want to see great works of art from you in the future.
“Sylva Belle. Shelynite.”
Her wielded blade remains in hand, held at an angle down and slightly to one side of the artist.
The Chronicler bobs her head. "Thank you. I will be happy to invite you to see my future works, which I assure you will be many and varied!
"My loyalty to the Slim is only mercenary, I assure you. They lured me here from the Shadow Plane with an offer to be the official court historian for their burgeoning new empire. But the job hasn't proven quite as exciting as I had hoped. Mainly, I've just stoked Kaneepo's ego with my paintings."
The Chronicler goes on to detail Kaneepo's history, confirming what you've learned from the paintings in the gallery. "They want to bring the curse back, but they also want to create more of their kind and begin a dynasty. They are searching for beings that can serve as their 'heirs,' to rule the Thinlands by their side. That is why they have been kidnapping and experimenting on mortals.
"Kaneepo's throne room is to the east. But to get to them, you'll have to get past their vivisectionist, a sadistic shae named Leiko, as well as a fetchling engineer who calls himself the Looksee Man."
“That’s helpful. Scary, but appreciated.”
Though still wounded herself, Sylva sheathes her other blade and uses her limited medical knowledge to take care of that dislocated joint.
”You need to leave this place. Should we succeed, your art will remain unblemished. And the bad guys won’t wreck it either, so… yeah. Art’s safe either way.
“Return for your belongings later. And… keep painting, but show the world your vision, not some skinny asshoIe’s ego.”
Ravenna is more skeptical of the Chronicler's sudden docility, and she keeps her rifle ready (if not quite aimed at anyone in particular).
"What can you tell us about Leiko and this...Looksee Man?"
”Leiko is infatuated with Kaneepo, but the Slim is only interested in her surgical skills. She can teleport short distances and is skilled with a blade. The Looksee Man has designed a magical machine that can transmit one creature's defining biological aspects to another. He has created some fascinating monstrosities so far. He has some mastery of spellcasting as well as his engineering expertise.”
Ravenna does not sense any deception from the Chronicler.
Sir Batman bends down to tie his shoe. The bronze-colored sprite stands back up to contribute to the most recent interrogation.
What hapoened?
Sylva would like the Chronicler to just leave. But she steps back close to Ravenna and starts cleaning her own wounds, not crazy about exchanging bodily fluids with the beaten dead horse. Through pained breaths, she replies to Sir Bat, “We gotta take out Kaneepo’s right hand man and left hand woman. And probably some fascinating monstrosities.”
She looks ready to bandage herself right away, regardless of the surrendered foe’s presence.
“I just need some… minutes.”
Mouth still hanging open, Sir Batman walks over to the bloodied Sylva.
May I?
The Champion of Mazludeh then heals her.
Sir Batman pouts.
"The left hand is always the more dangerous one," Ravenna says, though her face makes it clear that her mind is someplace else.
“Yes, please and thank you.”
Sylva gladly accepts Sir Batman’s healing and packs her kit.
And now that she’s no longer focused on her wounds, she’s noticing things about the others that she hadn’t picked up on before. Underneath that hard, shiny, bronze exterior is a soft interior. Shiny, but from tears.
And who is this left hand Ravenna speaks of? I hate to pry, but not prying is worse because it makes me want to pry even more… which means I don’t hate to pry. Did I seriously just lie to myself?
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Nox continues to fumble blindly for the next minute while interrogations take place, after having healed his wayward companion a bit.
He rubs his eyes and steadies himself on the corgi's side, but quickly retracts ince he realizes what it is. "OOh. Erm um, well I suggest aside from obviously detailing his soon to be downfall that yes you use your skills to fill the world with more good rather than the ego of mad folk and the depreciation of kin."
Looking to the other door he hums slightly not keen to fight more, but willing to do his part still. "If only we could resolve things more pracefully with them all..."
Sylva points to the incomplete painting, particularly at the sketched-in dying elves.
“The Chronicler merely painted suffering and innocent deaths. Those who cause it…” She gives Donkeytail’s hilt a pat. “This is the only way to get through to them.”
She lowers her gaze for a moment, then her eyes finally flicker to meet Nox’s.
“Thanks… for what you said back there. I don’t think I’d have dropped my blades if you hadn’t.”
She doesn’t care if the Chronicler hears her or not. Sylva’s hopeful that none of this madness will make her like that kentauride.
The Chronicler gathers her art supplies before opening a swirling portal of shadows and stepping through, disappearing. She leaves behind 4 gp and two bottles of glowing goo--a pair of bioluminescence bombs.
You proceed to the east. Ladders connect the floor of this two-story library to three separate balconies. Books, scrolls, and scattered pages are crammed every which way into shelves and stacks carved from the tree’s own wood. A firefly chandelier hangs from the domed center of the ceiling thirty feet above. Two doors exit to the east.
This room contains all the research Kaneepo had to acquire and assimilate in order to create the obnubilate curse, including tomes on magical diseases, elven medical texts, codices on evil rituals and curses, and more. While the collection as a whole is likely worth a great deal, it can be difficult to tell which writings are valuable, especially since many are in poor condition.
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Nox nods to Sylva as the painter disappears into her portal. "It's the least I can do."
Nox looks around the library for a time before pointing a set of books, scrolls, and various things to Ravenna. "Ooh those there, there.. and that one especially. Careful with the eel hide."
If given the osirian scroll he ho's and hums about it for a time while the corgi pants with antici---pation behind him.
"Ah ancient osirian texts... I can't read this at all but it must be important given the script and age. Do keep this secure and not water logged would you dear Ravenna?"
The northern door to the east opens into a chamber that looks like a noble’s bedroom. Yards of pastel fabric hang on an elegant, but dusty, four-poster bed and nearby vanity. Examining the bed reveals a thick layer dust, indicating that it has likely never been slept in. A large painting on the wall depicts two slender black-and-white creatures with skull-like faces and huge teeth. In a grotesque parody of a familial portrait, the figures hold hands and grin terribly toward the viewer.
The southern door leads into a vivisection theater. A stained wooden operating table with a gutter around the edge and a variety of leather restraints stands in the middle of this large theater. A rack of immaculate surgical tools stands along the western wall, while a counter to the east holds papers and pens. The floor has been carved in elaborate geometric designs, and an alcove to the northeast holds a bed.
A wispy, tenebrous woman stands here, wearing a long surgeon's coat and supple leather gloves. Her face is obscured by a white stone mask, and both her mask and her clothing sport black stripes in a clear attempt to match Kaneepo the Slim's own patterning. Over a dozen daggers adorn her belt, and she holds one in her hand. This must be Leiko.
"You? Kaneepo chooses you over me?!" she exclaims. "I will enjoy making you suffer!"
Sylva tumbles at her foe!
She stabs!
And she’d stab twice, but is NOT lingering here without a Bat Shield! She tumbles back to Sir Bat’s side!
Sir Batman looks up at the fake Slim Shady.
There can only be one!
"That," Ravenna grumbles, lining up a shot, "is too many knives."
Sylva stabs Leiko, though the woman's wispy body lacks anything vital to sneak attack! Ravenna shoots her as well, and as she reloads, she remembers that she is a shae. Shae are enigmatic humanoids from the Shadow Plane. Besides being immune to precision damage, they are resistant to cold and negative damage.
Leiko hurls a dagger at Sylva, but it goes wide. She draws another one and falls back, floating a few inches above the floor. "Come and get me, you fleshy sacks of meat!" she shouts defiantly as she blends into the shadows once more.
Sir Batman seriously considers throwing his shield at the stripper....errr....striped feline fanatic!
But not being dressed in reds, whites, or blues the Champion of Mazludeh Raises his shield, places both bronze-colored hands on it and Strides closer to her!
Is there anyone else that we may speak with? Fakes and shakes are not really our thang!
“Bags of meat?” Sylva blurts indignantly, “We’re hardly cocktail wieners to you. And speaking of wieners, Kaneepo isn’t into you.”
She gives Ravenna time to shoot or bomb before rushing in!
And speaking of her, “He’s not into my big friend either, so don’t waste your envy. Kaneepo would only f+!+ a mirror with legs.”
The eff-bomb is punctuated by a strike! It would be to the hamstring but, this magical creature apparently lacks vital organs. She’s definitely heartless, Sylva notes, considering the ‘operating table.’
Ravenna grabs one of the strange glowing bombs from her bandolier before hurling it at Leiko.
Leiko grunts in pain as Nox impales her with her own knife. She twists aside as Ravenna hurls the bioluminescent bomb, avoiding any ill effects.
As Sylva steps up to Leiko, the floor beneath her suddenly gives way as a pit opens up! The bottom of the pit is filled with a swarm of flesh-eating cockroaches! With quick reflexes, Sylva turns and stabs her blades into the stone floor, catching herself before she falls in the pit. The rogue is able to pull herself back up on solid ground.
At the same time as the pit trap triggers, however, Leiko slips through space, teleporting next to Nox! ”Kaneepo is mine, interlopers!” she exclaims as she stabs Nox twice with her dagger. The blade is ice cold as it pierces Nox’s flesh.
As Nox doubles over, Leiko cackles and darts away into the shadows in the corner of the room!
As Sylva moves at her foe, she does a quick assessment—
“Nox! Step east—if your light covers the whole room, I’ll bet she can’t slip away so easily.
“You need shadow to do that, don’t ya?”
Sylva points her blades, awaiting her flanking partner—and the light!
Sir Batman reacts quickly, as the stripped feline produces tricks that would make Merlin's Apprentice take note!
Sir Batman Raises his Shield.
Seriously considering decapitation her with his shield, the bronze-colored bat yells at her!
Only one of us will be snuggling with The Real Slim Shady! And it won't be you!
The Champion of Mazludeh then Strikes her fluttering up to boss her cat face!
Sir Batman Strides into the felines space! He looks up at her with a grin on his bronze bat-like face!
Cursing, Ravenna ducks into the room to help protect Nox, firing off another shot over the table in the center of the room.
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Nox wheezes wetly as Leiko stabs him, luckily batman is there to save the day and manages to push the sprite just enough that the knife doesn't puncture him fully. He rolls under the surgical table and leans on the supporting leg because his knees are weak and arms are heavy and for some reason he craves spaghetti. His light flickers weakly but remains just enough to keep the room mostly lit.
"Why are you all -cough- obsessed with such a mad fool?"
As the sprite leans heavily against the table leg providing him some cover, one of the belts of surgical tools rattles to life as the implements of fleshy devastation wiggle out with ill intent. Flinging themselves at Leiko, some impaling the wall.
As soon as the light creeps up, Sylva says, “Take THAT!”
And she hits! ”But” of course the trick to her twin feint is to “watch out for” the other blade.
“Ah nuts, you did watch out.”
"Kaneepo and I have so much in common!" Leiko shouts to Nox. "Our shadowy teleportation abilities! Our love of preying on fleshy humanoids! I should be the Slim's heir!"
Batman's threats do little to rattle the shae. She cries out in pain as Ravenna shoots her again, and Nox impales her with more surgical tools.
As Sylva closes the distance, Leiko once more teleports beside Nox. But Sylva is ready this time, changing course and rushing up to Leiko again. She leaps and drives her sword into the shae's midsection. Leiko shrieks as her shadowy body wavers and then fades away, leaving her mask, clothes, and knives to fall in a heap on the floor.
With the battle over, you can examine the notes in and room. You find carefully illustrated diagrams of Leiko’s bizarre experiments on Kaneepo’s victims. Sketches show test subjects with radically elongated limbs, faces stripped of muscle and fat, and other grotesque transformations.
Buried among the collection of worthless knives and needles here is a syringe containing a minor healing potion, as well as an onyx dog wondrous figurine.
Sylva sheathes her blades and stares at the empty air where the shadow-lady faded out.
The irony. This torturer died bloodlessly.
She takes out her Med Kit. “Time to operate.”
Sir Batman watches the form of the surgeon devolve into mist. The Champion of Mazludeh then smiles.
Another one bites the dust!
He then will Lay on Hands those injured, Refocusing as needed.
Once you are ready, you proceed up the stairs to the south. The walls, ceiling, and floor of this room are completely blackened by fire. Crude drawings scratched into the wood depict elves dying in all manner of horrifying ways. A large iron cage on the eastern side hangs open, its bars bent out of true. This is likely the cage originally used to imprison Kaneepo.
Finding nothing of value here, you proceed through the north door. This large chamber splits into two levels. A wide staircase connects the room’s western half to the eastern half, which is a full twenty feet higher. The ceiling rises forty feet above the lower floor. Worktables covered in books, beakers, and strange reagents crowd the lower floor.
On the room’s raised half stand two ten-foot-tall amber pods like empty bug cocoons, each glowing softly with orange light. A miniature gray tree with white leaves hangs suspended in the air between the pods, its roots twisting around each pod.
Clinging to the wall near the ceiling like a spider is a fetchling man wearing an armored lab coat. He wears a pair of goggles that cause his eyes to extend out of his head on exposed optical nerves like a snail’s eyestalks. This must be the Looksee Man!
"Let's have a look-see at you!" he says, his eyestalks waggling. "Ah! You look tough, but I'll not let you disrupt my beautiful work here! I'm afraid you must die!"