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Eris does her best to look empathetic as they dismiss the sheriff.
Though her companions know very well she's putting on a show given her usual laughter in the face of serious subjects, she even manages a tear.
"It is hard to have been a civil servant all your life and find that those higher up than you no longer see fit to employ you. It's not your fault. But it will be better for the town if we have a peaceful transition of power."
"Haha! Father, I don't think I can hold this face much longer!!! What a riot!"
Karik keeps silent during the sacking of Rhonda but when the deputies look like they are ready to start trouble he steps forward.
"Look boys. This goes above your pay grade and if you interfere here we are within our rights to slap you six ways to Sunday... or worse." He grins showing his fangs
Vaelor, might be time for some fun. But let them swing first
Seeing the deputies arm themselves Vaelor unwraps the spiked chain from her body, letting her robe fall to the fall revealing her true shape.
"Hi there boys! Go on, give me the excuse..."
"Yes please. Justification won't be difficult if you obstruct us in the execution of our duties. It won't just be our duties being executed, and I am very VERY thirsty."
"This ain’t right. You can’t just throw out this town’s only justice. It ain’t right!”
Hearing the deputies begin whining, Vivia's instincts for flummoxing whiny children fire instantly. She simply says "Why not, dears? Why isn't it right?" and lets the deputies stumble through their reasons for why the Archbaron for the town can't decide whatever he wants.
However, as her allies run the gamut of diplomatic to antagonistic, she grins. This was going to be wild one way or another.
Karik is seriously longing for a drink. He will need to pick up some strong liquor to keep his... other cravings... at bay.
"Accommodations can be made, [deputies]. Show that you can keep the peace; you know that there will be backlash to these laws, but you don't want Longacre to be torn apart by strife. Help us."
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The messages couldn't possibly be any more mixed, but the "good villain, bad villain" routine seems to work... mostly.
Ashel growls, "Fine. You're just doing the archbaron's will. But that doesn't mean I have to. Not any more." He yanks his vest a couple of times, tearing the buttons off, then throwing it to the floor and walking out of the jail. One by one, his colleagues follow suit. After a moment, the only ones left in the jail are you.
Ingrid put her palm to her face. ”What the fook was that?” She said, exasperated. ”We need a bloody message going into this! That was ‘Look at us we’re reasonable’ followed by ‘We’ll torture yer families’ followed by ‘We’re reasonable!’ And then ‘I vant to suck your blood!’” She finished with a ridiculous accent. ”We must have come across as bloody crazy. Which we probably my are, but that’s only good if we want to confuse them. The next time we go and do something like this let’s get our message straight *before* we go in. That was bloody embarrassing.”
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Brogol readjusts his mask and turns to Ingrid. "You ever read the five-pence novels? I love 'em, especially the Dottari Detective Directive. There's always a good Dot and a bad Dot. Good Dot is reasonable, bad Dot put the fear of Asmodeus in them. Works like a charm in the five-pencers, and worked like a charm here too."
"Anyways, who's got the Archduke's proclomation? Let's hang it and get onto the next stop."
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Eris laughs at how the conversation went as she picks up one of the torn vests and puts it on over her armor.
"Sometimes, I think I'm the only sane one here! Everyone had a different plan--I even conjured a tear! Ha! We probably should have locked them up in here until they settle down."
She looks around the office for anything that looks interesting, opening drawers and examining papers.
"Let's get all our flyers up--everyone needs to know how to find our party."
Vivia pulls out the notice, beckons to Cimri for the nails and hammer, and solidly affixes the soon-to-be-unpopular proclamation to the wall. As soon as she's done, she spits onto the jailhouse floor. "Fat lot of good this'll do. If all the deputies and Sheriff are gone, who's going in here?"
She looks over her shoulder at Eris and Ingrid "Embarrassing or not, they got the message. Only shame is that we're going to have to gut the whole lot of them later." She taps Eris' dad's cranium "I bet he's saying the same thing."
"I'll bet a pretty copper all that managed was to turn them into even hotter headed idealists than they already were."
She steps out of the jail to see if any other them are still hanging around, then asks "Castle Gate next?"
Damn, she's got a point... I have to get a handle on myself
"Sorry about that Ingrid... Yeah we better make sure we're all on the same page next time. I waasss aiming for the hard way or the easy way style of thing... sorry if I missed. Karik seems reproachful.
"Yeah Castle Gate. Do we expect opposition? If so how are we gunna handle it? I can play nice if needed. Vaelor will just keep quiet."
Raziya's smile is hidden by her helm, but the grim skull across its face seems somehow playful as it tilts to the side. "Vivia, hot headed idealists only spring up where there's no one to stamp them out. If Fex leaves this office empty, and doesn't create a new one to cover things, then yes, you'll win your pretty copper, but this is just a temporary void, and voids need filling. We just need to make certain that we're of obvious use to whomever has the job of dealing with those deputies," the empty, painted sockets turn to Cimri, "And to make sure that no one gets hurt who doesn't have to."
Ingrid slapped Karik on the shoulder and gave it a little squeeze. His blood drinking ways obviously didn’t faze her. ”S’all good. As the others said if they cause trouble we’ll gut them. We’re still getting used to working together. Now, as we head to the gate, what’s the plan?”
She looks around the office for anything that looks interesting, opening drawers and examining papers.
Eris begins going through the jail, starting with the vests, and finds the following:
Within the vests is a collection of keys. The sheriff and the deputies each had a matching key which opens three cabinets (two in the common room, one in the sheriff's office). There is a second style of matching key that opens the door to the jail, and a third matching style that opens the jail cells. There are enough copies of each of these keys for everyone. Finally, in the sheriff's vest, Eris finds a unique key that has no matches.
In the cabinets, you find:
Three suits of leather armor
six light wooden shields
Eight clubs
Six light crossbows
60 bolts
Six longswords
Eight saps
8 potions, each marked with the symbol of Iomedae
Another key, etched with the word "Pillory"
This is in addition to the masterwork longsword Rhona left at her desk, which is as much a symbol of the sheriff's office as the embroidered vest.
And, in the sheriff's desk, Eris finds a lockbox. Using the unique key to open the lockbox, you find:
a wand
a masterwork bronze scizore (Pathfinder RPG Ultimate Equipment 36, 53) decorated with a sculpted skeletal lion
1 dose of blue whinnis
10 doses of pesh
a collection of 17 pornographic Taldan quartos containing scripts for two-performer “plays” (including “Her Highness’s Tea Service” and “The Guardsman’s Fine Salute”) worth 2 gp each
seven skull-shaped onyxes (worth 25 gp each)
and a pouch containing 10 pp and a bill of ownership for a “Halfling, male, 20 years, service-trained. Missing toe on left foot. Responds to the name ‘Ardin.’”
As Eris goes through the jail (perhaps with help from others), Cimri nods to Vivia and gives her the hammer and a nail, following her outside to the front deck to post the first notice. As she takes a quick glance about, Vivia sees the former deputies turning a corner down the street.
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Once she has gone through all the office, Eris takes one of the crossbows and some bolts. Sitting in the sheriff's chair, with one of the torn vests over her armor, she kicks her feet up on the desk.
She plays with a crossbow while the other talk, occasionally loosing a bolt into the ceiling.
"I'm keeping this one. Anyone want the rest of this stuff? I get dibs on the halfling slave, too, if we find him. I'm a little disturbed about the missing toe. But perhaps I could make him wear shoes. He's a slave after all, right! Ha!"
"Might as well help ourselves as part of job well done." Vivia sweeps up the items from the lockbox before passing the wand to someone who has the kind of magical senses needed to make sense of it. As for the three cabinets, she eyes the equipment with little interest, except for an eyeroll at the eight potions.
"Mostly worthless. Time to do our good deed for today and leave it for the next sheriff. Except that longsword. That, we'll show to Razelago as proof, right?" She picks the longsword up and stows it in a pack where it can't be easily identified.
Brogol takes a sap and a crossbow, along with ten bolts. Looking over the pornography, Brogol puts a couple aside muttering, "Got that one. And that one..." The the driver chuckles waves one quarto at the others before stuffing it into his cloak's inside pocket. "Ai, 'guardsman's salute.' That's clever, yeah!"
Raising an eyebrow as Eris sniffs a potion, Brogol nods. "We should keep 'em none-the-less. Magic is good, and valuable even if it ain't useful."
”Aye. Job didn’t say we can’t sell what we can. Their fault for not giving better worded orders. So let’s loot the place and move on.” Ingrid said, already mentally counting the coin.
Raziya dips the edge of a finger into the top of Eris's potion and gingerly tastes it.
"Probably a curative, but I'm not certain.
"As for the gear, we didn't get any instructions; we weren't even told to lock up. We should absolutely bring back the sword as proof, but the rest seems to be entirely on the table.
Oh, do make certain to leave at least something behind so that we have wiggle room under divination."
After finishing up at the jail, you head towards Longacre’s western gate.
You reach the Castle Gate, looking as if some giant had picked up the stone gate from a rugged frontier fort and dropped it across the road leading into town. A set of weathered wooden doors stands open in the moss-covered fortified stone. It is one of the gates through the chest-high wooden fence that surrounds the town. A middle-aged woman sits in a chair beneath a rigged awning atop the tower that sits beside the gate. She watches your approach with a not unfriendly eye, but it’s not exactly warm, either. ”Good morning down there. Quite a little troop ye have. Little late to go huntin’.”
"Good morning Mrs. Gramel. I trust you're having an uneventful day so far? There are some notices from the Baron that need to be posted and then we'll be on our way."
Vivia waves to the woman "Not hunting today. But earning our keep all the same." She takes out the notice, nailing it to the inner side of the gate. "You see that business in front of the church yesterday? What did you think?"
Brogol sighs, wishing Razelago's messenger had come through with his mask. Eh, fook it. Word will be out soon enough from the sheriff's office. Lowering his makeshift mask, Brogol nods to the seated woman.
"Oi, Bo. How are'ye today? Hope Denton is well. Listen, I'm sorry to say that the Archbaron has closed the castle gate until further notice. We'll need you to close the gate immediately, per the notice my fellow messenger is nailing up. Take the day off, go home, make a nice dinner for your family. I'm sure there's still plans you'll get paid, no fault of your own and all that."
The woman stands up on the tower and says, "Notices? What notices? First the murder and now closing the gate!? We’ve kept this town safe and this gate open—except for nights and holidays—for all the eighteen years Dent and I have minded it! No cow-pile baron or his trumped-up dung-berries are going to make us close it! You don't move; I'm comin' down to read this blasted 'notice' of yours."
Indeed, she makes her way down the short tower with an unloaded crossbow slung over one arm, then thrusts her hand angrily towards Brogol, "Gimme the notice! Nobody's closing this gate without my say so!"
Apparently hearing the racket, a man of similar age emerges from a house in the shadow of the tower, "Bo, what's all this? Who are these folks?"
"They say they're here to close the gate, Dent."
Vivia doesn't give the woman the notice, but rather than immediately nailing it to the gate she extends it toward Gramel so she can read it. "What I want to know is what you did to get the Archbaron closing YOUR gate rather than either of the other two. I mean, you'll still be letting people in and out, but I imagine it'll be a pain checking people's documents and the like."
All Citizens of and Visitors to the Town of Longacre,
By Order of His Lordship Darellus Fex, Archbaron of Longacre, and in accordance with the wishes of Her Infernal Majestrix, Queen Abrogail II of the Thrice-Damned House of Thrune, the following decrees are now in effect:
Longacre’s western gate, known as the Castle Gate, is closed until further notice. All travel into and out of Longacre must employ the north or south gates and be officially sanctioned. Only the archbaron’s agents, sanctioned local businesses, or those displaying a writ of passage bearing the seal of House Fex, will be granted passage. All others must obtain a writ from the Longacre notary or do business elsewhere.
Longacre citizens shall not congregate in groups numbering greater than six in private, or in numbers greater than twelve in public. Exceptions will be made only for families with more than six members or for individuals undertaking the natural course of their business. Gatherings for the purposes of celebration, education, or religion are not exempt from this order.
A curfew is now in effect. From the hour after dusk to the hour before dawn, no citizen of Longacre is allowed upon the town’s streets without a writ of exception bearing the seal of House Fex. The archbaron’s agents and sanctioned local businesses are exempt from this order. Those seeking a writ of exception may apply at the Longacre Notary.
Any persons found in violation of these mandates or any other laws and sanctions of Longacre will be considered seditious agents and are subject to questioning, imprisonment, and summary judgment by the Archbaron of Longacre and officials of the town government.
For the prosperity of Longacre, the protection of the Empire, and the glory of House Thrune,
Darellus Fex,
Archbaron of Longacre
Trusting Raziya and the locals to handle this Karik keeps quiet, just watching and waiting to see where things go from here.
”Must be nice. Getting a paid vacation like this. Doesn’t seem worth complaining about.”
"Yep," Brogol adds, adding to Ingrid and Eris's thoughts. "I'm sure the gate will be open again in no time. And as my companion notes, you'll be able to open it and close it for official business, so you can still take part in... this joyful task from time to time."
Dent begins walking over from the house while Bo squints and examines the notice that Vivia holds aloft. Her lips curl in disgust before she spits on the ground. "Well, that just ain't gonna happen. We're the gatekeepers and there hasn't been no bad traffic coming in or out. Only vileness that's happened was outside the gates at ol' Louslik's. And if you boot lickin', trumped up lickspittles think you're gonna be closin' it, you can just turn yourselves around and bring the sheriff or the baron himself."
She's getting herself thoroughly worked up and Dent nods in agreement. "Aye, go on now, get out of here."
Karik and Raziya are a bit distracted by this back and forth, but everyone else seems to be on edge and notices one of the deputies is watching from down the street. When he realizes he's been spotted, he turns and casually walks away.
Ingrid looked at her companions, gauging to see how close they were to resorting to violence. ”Seems we are drawing a crowd, and I’m not sure we need to put on a show just yet. Besides, it seems pretty clear that these men don’t have the judgement to be gatekeepers anyways. Probably best to get the paperwork in order to fire them.”
Brogol's jaw clenches, his face flushing red. Throttling his anger and pushing it back down, Brogol nods and says, voice flat, "Sidebar. Like in the 5-pencer Belial's Barristers..."
Stepping far enough away from the gatekeepers to remain unheard, Brogol continues. "Aye, Ingrid. And that crowd is former deputies. Seems they mean to interfere. Which means we need to deal with both the deputies and Bo and Dent. I suggest we leave through the gate, saying we'll be back soon, and let the deputies follow us. When we get to a suitable bend in the road we ambush those fookers and resolve that problem, once and for all. Thoughts?"
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Eris pouts at the gatekeepers. "Fine by me--if you don't want a vacation. I had even arranged for it to be paid. But I can tell you just don't know when to quit working."
When Ingrid and Brogol discuss strategy, she agrees reluctantly. "We could have put them in their place here and now. But I always like to draw within the lines. Ha! Let's put our notice up and report back. Maybe we can still have fun later."
Turning back to the gatekeepers, she says "I'm sure the sheriff's going to be LOTS of help for you."
"They've been fired already, and I have no intention of letting anyone carry tales that all it takes to flummox us are a pair of senile seat-warmers."
Turning to Bo and Dent she calls up
"This gate was your task, but it was never truly yours. If you leave now, you can still trust in the Archbaron's graces, and in time, when your guilt or innocence is proved, he may permit you to return to your posts. But if you do something foolish like fire that crossbow, I can assure you that your miserable hides are not worth the diamond dust to make whole."
"Fired?" Brogol asks, his face scrunching in confusion. "Did I miss something? Someone is to man the gate here for official business, per the Archbaron's orders. Is that to be us?"
Once Raziya's challenge is offered, Brogol casts a quick glance over his shoulder towards where the deputies lurked, hoping that they've left, before yelling himself.
"Listen to the lady, you dumb fookers. Fex makes the calls around here, and you'd best put aside your anger and CLOSE. THAT. FOOKIN'. GATE!"
Ingrid didn’t say a word. Instead she smiled, her teeth showing, and flexed her fingers in anticipation. She slowly started to circle around, to keep an eye on the former deputies and to get closer to the soon-to-be-dead gate guards.
Disregarding Dent and Bo's refusal, Vivia hammers the notice into the wood of the gate.
As before, their little group of troublemakers seemed to be saying everything and anything, and not making a whole lot of coherent sense with it either. Somehow that had worked out with the sheriff. But it probably wasn't earning them any brownie points with the Archbaron. Well, now that it was already a steaming pile, no sense not having some fun with it.
Once the notice is up, Vivia makes a show of hollering out "Oh sheriff! Some book lickin' trumped up lickspittles here for you to sort out! Some folks who think they know the laws of the town better than the Archbaron himself!" She turns to look at the two, lowering her voice. "Like it or not, these-" She slaps the notice with a hand "-are the rules now. I wonder if the sheriff is going to show up to arrest you for violating them?"
[dice=local to understand what authority the party actually has, inspiration]1d20+6+1d6
Karik decides to try a different approach.
"Look, this is above your pay-grade. Do they really pay you enough to deal with all this crap? Just tap out and send a complaint up the line and let some else deal with it."
Bo turns five shades of red, impotent fury boiling, until she barks, ”Fine! FINE! Go ahead and close the gate! But do it yourselves, ya pond scum!” She turns in her heel, grabs Dent’s arm and drags him behind her as they retreat into their modest home by the wall, leaving behind them a wake of curses and epithets.
Looking at the gate before you, you know you’re going to need to close the doors and then lower a pair of very heavy iron bars to secure them. The first can be done with either a strength check or finding the gate mechanism. The second will just take the ability to move and lift 200 pounds.
Brogol slips into the tower that Bo sat atop, looking for some sort of mechanism to open the gates. There was no way that Bo and Dent did the work by hand...
Vivia spends a moment staring at the backs of the two gate guards before shrugging "Who would've thought a pair of old timers would behave no better than spoiled brats. I'm starting to think the notices are being put exactly where people who might oppose the Archbaron are working."
She joins the others in spotting the gate mechanism.
You're able to quickly find the mechanism in the tower that closes the gate. With a horrid groan of rusty hinges, it swings shut. After that, it takes only a little coordination among the strongest of you to get the iron bars in place. You make quick work of it, but by the time you're done, the deputies are coming down the street with their clubs out.
"That's enough of that, I think," says Curtwyn. "Time for you to leave... all of you."
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