Chuffy also draw Dog Slicer with his remaining Move action.
An eagle flails about on Chuffy ...
...slashing him twice with nasty talons.
Mogmurch attempt to slip out, but not able.
Another eagle, offended by latest ingredient addition, go wild on Mogmurch ...
...gouging him deep.
Reta try slipping from bonds, but certainly struggle.
Poog flex big muscles...
...but not able to make much progress.
Chuffy take deep breath, relax muscles, twist arm weird, and ropes slip right off... how he does it? Mystery. Chuffy draw sword and makes ready with slaughter.
Eagle go after Reta ...
...slashing her arm.
Last eagle also not pleased with Mogmurch soup du jour...
...nibbling on foot.
Mogmurch furrows his brow. In the future, I will have to remember not to pee on an eagle, he thinks as he tries pulling and gnawing his bonds apart.
Chuffy retaliates, but believes in collective guilt, so he swings at whatever eagle is stupid enough to get in his line of attack!
Reta try even harder!
A fresh salvo of pie filling enters the foray...
Eagle attempt to attack Chuffy...
...but unable to scratch unbridled goblin.
Mogmurch strain on bonds, but no progress.
Eagle get up in Reta's grill...
...scratching and clawing hard.
Reta come close to bursting bonds, but not quite there...
Poog strain against bonds...
...but just shy of breaking point.
Chuffy pick out eligible eagle...
...and apply hurting to it.
Pair of eagles begin targeting goblins; first Mogmurch...
...failing terribly;
Then Poog...
...hurting him deep.
Mogmurch growls in frustration. I've tried wriggling out, and I've tried pulling free. These things are impossible! A sly grin (that nobody can see under the ridiculous pie-related circumstances) creeps across his face. Let's see if I can eagle my way out!
Mogmurch stretches his bonds taut and slips them directly into a nearby eagle's grasp. To coerce the eagle to play along, he offers it a persuasive headbutt.
Poog again attempts to break his bonds.
Chuffy not totally clear on the mechanics at play. If Chuffy able to do both, he swing again on Eagle 1 (the hurtest), then exit pie. If unable to do both, he just get out of pie. Chuffy make the following rolls to accomplish this nonsense.
What chaos have Chuffy wrought?
Reta getting tired of this s!&~!
More hot pie filling is added to the pie...
...dousing Mogmurch and several eagles with hot filling.
Eagle begins to flail about upon Poog...
...grazing him with claw and beak.
Mogmurch wriggle way closer to eagle...
...placing bindings into talons, smashing it in skull with... skull.
Eagle decide he have better target, but talons stuck in bindings...
...bursting Mogmurch's bindings safely... somehow.
Reta and Poog flex big gobomuscles and finally burst their bonds.
Chuffy pick out injured eagle and attempt eagle-slaughter... but manage dropping sword in, and mouth-full of, nastiness.
Remaining eagles spread their aggression to Poog...
...missing by grace of Zarongel,
And Reta...
...nibbling arm.
Mogmurch smartest gobbo alive! Mogmurch mentally shrieks with his mouth closed so as to avoid getting gross pie filling that he'd already peed in inside his mouth. Time for my triumphant escape!
Mogmurch bursts out of the crust and spikes the last of his bombs at an eagle and, consequently, pretty much everybody else in the pie.
"Bomb appetit," Mogmurch snarks as he strides out of the crater. If he had sunglasses, he would totally put them on right now.
Poog grins widely as his bonds burst free. His smile is short lived as these crazy birds keep pecking him for no good reason.
"Take summa this no good crazy bird!"
Chuffy gets out.
A fresh salvo of steaming pie filling penetrates the crust...
...scalding Reta, Chuffy, and several eagles.
Eagle targets Mogmurch...
...and claws ferociously.
Mogmurch burst forth from pie, leaving parting gift for closest eagle...
...knocking it unconscious...
...and causing massive amounts of bedlam, including death of another eagle!
Eagle try attacking Reta...
...and scratch with a claw.
Reta attempt to attack random eagle...
...knocking it unconscious.
Poog unleashes bolt of fire upon last eagle, incinerating it...
...while Chuffy sneak out of pie...
...and Poog realize might be good idea to follow suit.
Wise Mummy Sprattleharsh approach pie and pie-covered chieftain hopefuls and quiet Birdcrunchers.
"I believe we have seen what needs to be seen! We have totals points. Chuffy, you have eleven! Poog, you have eighteen! Reta... twenty-one! Mogmurch... thirty!"
Birdcrunchers cheer as the results are tallied. They can only hope their new chieftain's temperament is less volatile than his bombs.
[b]"Mogmurch, I present you Crunchy Crown! You also have power to bestow title of subchieftain on any of other Licktoads who also did trials. Tomorrow, chieftain and subchieftains get to loot tribe's treasure chest. Tonight, we feast!
Celebrations go long into night, with goblins trying to impress chieftain and party with offerings of food, entertaining, and self-immolation.
New day brings promise of treasure, and Birdcrunchers do not disappoint.
"Chief Mogmurch accept Birdcrunch fealty! You!" Mogmurch points at a random goblin and hands her his skull mask. "Nail crown to skull so not fall off! You!" He points at another random goblin. "Bake a for real pie just for Mogmurch! You!" He gestures vaguely towards a cluster of other Birdcrunchers. "Make funny puppet show! You goblets!" He waves his hand indiscriminately at a large number of female goblins. "You harem! Congraturation! And you..." He gestures vaguely at the other Licktoads. "Chief declare you honorarary deputy subchieftainlets! Chief Mogmurch has spoken!"
Venkelvore's gut, I'm going to be so good at this, Mogmurch thinks.
The next morning, Chief Mogmurch staggers to the clan bonfire with a crown affixed to his mask, a delicious pie in his belly, a familiar ache in his thighs, and goofy puppets capering in his head. "Fetch the loot chest!" he commands. He smiles as it draws near, dramatic music welling up in his imagination. He eases the lid open...
No fireworks? Worst chest ever.
Disappointed Mogmurch is on the verge of ordering one or more goblins to jump in the bonfire when he notices a variety of other consumables and combustibles, which mollifies him considerably. He takes a moment to search through the chest before addressing his peers. "Licktoads! Chief Mogmurch offer gifts! For Poog: pointy wand. For Reta: sharp blade. For Chuffy: shady cloak. Also, everygob get healthy potion. Chief Mogmurch keep everything else until further novice. Chief Mogmurch has spoken!"
Several acolytes tends to wounds of new Birdcruncher chieftain and subchieftains before bedtime.
Next morning, Wise Mummy Sprattleharsh wake best Birdcrunchers up with a start.
"Morning sleepy gobos! Today is big day. Today, you go to Munchmeat Farm, and you get rid of Pa! Pa Munchmeat... he hits hard, and he casts spooky plant spells. He has fire-breathing pigs... that breathe fire. And has a mean daughter with a pet weasel bigger than a horse. And there might be other monsters there, too. Never been; not my problem -- yours."
Best Birdcrunchers receive crude map of the way to Munchmeat Farms and make their way to do him in.
Sounds of snorting and thrashing issue from the bushes ahead, when all of sudden, bigpig sees the Birdcrunchers!
The party is marching spread out from one another. About thirty feet ahead, the large hog Piggy turns from his meal in the huckleberry patch to confront the Birdcrunchers.
Fire-breathing pigs, eh? Mogmurch muses. Better hit them with something other than fire...
Mogmurch lobs a vial of acid at the pig.
Chuffy carrying trusty hand crossbow through forest, shoot the pig!
Chuffy take quick shot at Piggy, but bolt bounce right off Piggy's tough hide.
Piggy snort at sight of goblins, leans head down, and gobbles up a gourd hanging from neck.
Reta fire bow at Piggy...
...and dig nasty gouge into side.
Chuffy reload, shoot dumb pig again!
Fire breathing pigs?! This day can be greatest day Poog ever get! Poog must put pig in poke!
"Reta no like piggies, Reta hit him good make him no squeal no more"
Chuffy fire again, but bolt bounce off thick skin.
Poog snorts and huffs at Piggy...
...to little effect.
Mogmurch lob acid vial at Piggy and splash really good.
Piggy approaches to within 10 feet of Birdcrunchers and lets out tremendous belch and gout of flame...
...coating all in nasty-smelling fire.
Reta target Piggy-knee and score shallow hit.
"Spread out! Surround him!" Chief Mogmurch commands. "Don't let him roast more than - " He does some rigorous mental math. "One? At a time?"
By way of demonstrating, Mogmurch darts into position behind and to the side of the beast and lobs another vial of acid.
Chuffy delay until a flank buddy is available, then drops useless hand crossbow, draws Dogslicer while moving into flanking, and chops at pig.
Chuffy bide time...
Poog continue to reason with pig, but to no avail. He draw wand with squiggles on it and aim just behind pig...
...making him squeal in pain. Poog approach piggy to provide support for Chuffy...
...which he take advantage of in big way.
Mogmurch bathe Piggy in more acid, splashing Poog and Chuffy slightly.
Piggy not happy with sneaky one and try to gore...
...and stick him hard in the gut.
Reta shoot at target again...
...and hit in flank in spite of crowd around him.
Chuffy rethink situation, five foot step away, draw potion cure moderate, drink it.
Hit it with sharp things!!!!
Reta looks frustrated and moves in to attack with her dogslicer.
or +2 to the attack if able to flank
Chief Mogmurch closes in on the pig, providing flanking if possible, and swings his club at it.
Poog try a stab, but no Piggy at end of stabby.
Chuffy take a moment to quaff potion, and start feeling much better afterward.
Mogmurch start to surround Piggy, but miss with club.
Piggy look at three gobos surrounding him...
...and attempt running Mogmurch through...
...giving him massive blow to side.
Reta get flank with Poog and try to strike true, but strike false.
"Poog will lay waste to all aminals too snobberish to be buddy buddy with Poog!"
The most important thing about being the chieftain, Mogmurch thinks to himself, is not letting anybody else know how muttsucking much that hurt.
He backs up a bit and quaffs a healing extract.
Newly invigorated, Chuffy returns to flanking and ATTACK!
Poog try to stab, but thick skin is thick.
Chuffy also try to stab, but can't punch through skin either.
Mogmurch take a drink of watered-down extract. It help. Barely.
Piggy get wild look in eyes and chomp down on another gourd...
...but only Chuffy able to capitalize.
Reta give it a try...
...and get a good slice finally.
Mogmurch growls and grumbles and downs another extract.
Feeling uncomfortably energetic, he moves back into flank.
Poog takes a step away from the piggy, reciting a prayer to Zarongel.
"You piggy no special fire monster. You piggy no buddy buddy with Zarongel. You piggy bouda git roasty toasty!!!!"
Poog's hands glow as Zarongel imbues him with holy hot heat.
"Everygob okey-dokey?" Chief Mogmurch asks. "Might be more of thems between here and Munchmeat Farm. Next time, yoink the fire gourds!"
"Poog got stick o' feelin' better, if'n a gobbo got a sumpin for ol' Poog."
"Poog got stick o' feelin' better, if'n a gobbo got a sumpin for ol' Poog."
Birdcrunchers proceed on trail to farm; strangely enough, fast-moving Piggy trot-marks go that way too.
Surrounded by a rickety wooden fence and thick mud, Munchmeat Farm slumps in a soggy valley between two low tors. A slimy-looking creek winds through the farm, which is barely anything to look at. A house in the center of the fenced-in area leans against two hefty buttresses holding up three large beams. It’s balanced on numerous thick log stilts
that create a cage-like hollow in the mud below the building. North of the house are a few filthy chicken coops, and to the west an upturned boat, propped against the fence, has been built into an impromptu shelter. A shed sits to the south of the building, and south and east of this shed are a few tired stretches of garden that look like they’re best at growing mud and weeds.
Poog eyes the rickety wooden fence.
Zarongel like for Poog burn fences. Poog burn last fence real good. Then Zarongel bless Poog with lotsa flashy bang fireworks.
Poog looks around at his companions to check and see if they are paying attention to the fact that he is slinking off toward the rickety wooden fence with a gleam of mischief in his eye.
"Wait, Poog, there may be bigger fences to fry!"
Bigger fences?! How will Poog find a fence bigger than this fence inside of this fence. Would not inside of fence mean fence is smaller? Poog intrigued.
"Poog intrigued!."
Birdcrunchers scout area for fences...
Chief Mogmurch surveys the area with a keen tactical eye. "Us not crosses the fence yet," he says quietly. "First us gets the land of the lay. Sneaks around to the ex-boat and peek around."
By way of example (and because he's the chieftain and won't be told differently), he creeps along the fence towards the wrecked boat.