THEY be Goblins TOO!! (Inactive)

Game Master Edeldhur

Sense Motive: 1d20 - 2 ⇒ (15) - 2 = 13

Medge isn't sure if they're telling her the truth or not. "Ok so they say that their mother makes them check on Vorka and wants to know all of Vorka's stuff."

"Hey, lizard guy? How far away do you guys live? Which way?"

"We could pay Vorka's sister a visit I suppose, if Vorka had loot, Vorka's sister might have phat lewt too?" Mortimer muses.

Twitchy nods. "A visit to the Lizard Queen? I think we'll have to, if we're going to keep our territory. However... before we do that..." Twitchy pulls Ronk's hand, dragging the barbarian below decks, "...Ronk has something he has to show me. Right, Ronk?"

She glances at her new husband, meaningfully.

He does?... Yes We have things to show Twitchy! The dragging is only temporary as Ronk figures out Twitchy's meaning and swiftly moves below deck.

Crazy Goblins and their questionable mating habits. A war could be blooming but Twitchy wants the Ronk! And the Ronk she shall have!And that scene shall fade to black.

[dice=Sense Motive]1d20-2

Medge isn't sure if they're telling her the truth or not. "Ok so they say that their mother makes them check on Vorka and wants to know all of Vorka's stuff."

"Hey, lizard guy? How far away do you guys live? Which way?"

Medge, it would seem the lizard fella is speaking the truth.

"That wayzzzz" - the lizard points - "Halfsssss day walkingssss"

Medge looks at the remaining members of her crew. "Lizard say they live a half days walk away. Medge was thinking it much faster to have Twitchy fly over on Fluffer. But now she not here. Medge not sure what to do. Keep lizards tied up and wait?"

From below decks comes the sounds of shrieking, scratching, giggling and thumping. After a bit, a disheveled Twitchy comes up with Ronk, both grinning from ear to ear. "So, we got a plan?"

Gurp scratches his chin in an attempt to look sagely. "Gurp still thinks whole thing not worth the effort. But if we going to do it, we do it right! We wait until Gurp has more mojo, then we all attack Vorka Two at once." Gurp absentmindedly pets Squishy's flank as he continues. "But Gurp not sure he trust lizards to stay tied. Who to say they not slip out of rope and warn Vorka Two?"

"We should do it today. When these lizards don't return Vorka's sister is going to send another batch. And where would we be?"Mortimer states flatly."That way, we don't have to worry about lizards getting away either. "

"Plan? We all go to lizard camp, one of us scouts for more details, like where Vorka's sister is, then we see what to do."

Ronk could wait for the morning. He is staring at Twitchy while he says that.

All for a plan but Ronk just learned the art of love. And he is not a planner.

A goblin cunundrum?

"Medge thinks we should go snoop. Twitchy can ride over on Fluffer, sneaky like." She looks around the group and settles her gaze on Twitchy. "Everybody has different plan. What Twitchy think?"

"I say we go now, before they come for us in force." Twitchy grabs her alchemy kit and strides Fluffer. "Anyone else want to fly on Fluffer with me?"

Ronk face contorts into a deep frown at Twitchy's words. He crosses his arms petulantly and mumbles Fine We will go do things!. His mumbled words turning to yelling at the last word as he flings his hands up. Ronk walks away to find his bonking stick.

Twitchy comes up to Ronk, and puts her head on his burly chest. "Ronk, if we don't deal with lizards now... they'll interrupt us ALL THE TIME. Best deal with them now, and then have special Ronk Twitchy time afterwards?"

She looks up at him. "You ready to go off, visit Vorka's sister, and maybe bash some lizard heads and set fire to stuff if Vorka's sister not nice?"

Twitchy packs Flutter up for the upcoming journey...

And gives the GM and the other players a *poke*

...and she starts to sing.

It’s a road trip!
Just me and you --
And the rest of this
demented goblin crew...
Oh, what are we to do?

It’s a road trip!
Just me and you
Medge, Ronk, Gurp, the Cat
and its chatty bird too
Dread pirates through and through!

Ronk sighs deeply then slowly gathers his things. Once he is ready his whole demeanor changes. He turns to the others and yells Lets go already! Ronk is ready and you should be too!

"Bah, fine then! Do it you way this time. If we die, Gurp's spirit haunt everyone else spirits." Gurp checks his pockets to make sure he has everything, makes sure Dread overking Squishy is safely perched on his head, and piles the slug sacks on Squishy's back. "Gurp ready, Ronk! Shut you face! Three swamp curses for yelling!"

Heigh-ho! Heigh-ho!
To Lizard Land we go!
Heigh-ho! Heigh-ho! Heigh-ho!
Heigh-ho! Heigh-ho!

Zeli's song is infectious. Twitchy joins in.

It will be thrilling
To go lizard killing
Heigh-ho! Heigh-ho!

The lizards stare wide eyed as all the singing suddenly erupts - they seem quite agitated, looking at one another, then back at the gathered crew, completely in doubt as to what is going on.

You guys tell me - where do you want to head to, exactly?

To Vorka's sister, of course!

We're off to see the Sister, The Vorka-ish Sister that's her
We hear she is a pissed off sis, if ever a sis there was
If ever, oh ever a sis there was, the Vorka-ish Sister is one because
Because, because, because, because, because
Because of the lizardly things she does
We're off to see the sister, and all her little lizards too
do do do do do do do do do do!

Source material: "We're off to see the Wizard" from the Wizard of Oz

Hahaha, I figured as much :D My question is: North, South? Anyone tracking, etc?

What? You want directions? We're goblins. We don't need no stinking directions...

"Hey Medge! Which way did the lizards say Vorka's sister lived? Tell them that they're coming with us, and if they lead us false, we eat them."

Ronk immedeatly closes his mouth with a snap at the swamp curses. He then begins a round of pouting until everyone is ready to leave. He perks right up at the promise of eating lizards though. Running over to Twitchy he grabs her sleeve and mumbles, not yells! We eat the now?

Raise one foot and put it in front of the other. Don't try to raise two feet at the same time. To those without legs, or have more then two, or have wings, the last sentence does not apply.

"He says they half a days walk that ways" she points. "HEY LIZARDS! You coming on trip with us! You behave or we feeds you to Squishies!"

Twitchy leans in Ronk. "Not now. We need guides. But there should be lots of lizards at Vorka's sister's place."

The trek through the swamp, dragging their captives along, is not an easy one. Except for Twitchy and Fluffer who, carefully picking their flying paths, manage to avoid getting entangled in the ever present vines all around them.

I'm picturing something like this.

Ok, so:
- Throw me some marching orders, particular travelling or scouting arrangements (regarding the captive lizardfolk for example), etc;
- Throw me some Survival rolls (assuming any of you are actually trying to follow the general direction pointed by your prisoners :P);
- Twitchy, as long as you don't try any 'funky' flying maneuvers, you should be safe;
- Last but not least, there is one unconscious lizard folk. I hesitate to ask, but... What are you going to do with him?

Hmm. Medge has great stealth for scouting but not so much with survival. She'd be rolling with a -2 penalty for that. But she would want to march at the front of the group. Can we wake up the unconscious one? If not we could tie him to the mast.

He's not coming around any time soon - unless you kind souls would like to heal him of course :P

Tying to mast sounds fine. Besides its a good idea the lizards have some incentive to behave. If we really want to go the right way, Gurp should lead. If we want hilarious comedy that will involve us not finding the lizard village, why, any of us could! :D

survival: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (5) - 1 = 4

"It's that way!"

Help Gurp, you're our only hope!

Survival: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (4) + 11 = 15

"Stupid talking cat! You know nothing! It that way!"

I mean, I could heal the lizard. But that would mean less healing for Squishy. So...sucks to be the lizard.

Twitchy nods. "Go ahead and tie the sick lizard up, Medge."

Survival: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (20) + 4 = 24

"Gurp's right. That way it is," she says, adjusting the direction of Gurp's finger a bit. "I'll fly on overwatch. Medge can lead because she's Captain. How about Gurp and Squishys next, and then my brave Ronk and his fierce cat?"

Zeli shakes her head at the antics, but decides not to comment.

survival: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5

"Could have sworn it was THAT way," as he points to the direction opposite of what Gurp is pointing. "If you're sure..."Mortimer's voice trails off uncertainly as he decides to follow Gurp's directions for now. There would be times for I-told-you-so later if it didn't work out, anyway.

Ronk walks over to Mortimer and grabs his face. Leaning in close he speaks quietly It is dangerous to question the Swamp. If ok though Ronk will take care of you. He is by now petting Morts face with a toothy grin.

Ronk turns his head from Mort will still holding the larger creatures head he watches to see when everyone is ready. Once ready Ronk smiles broadly and yells, Onward!. He will climb onto
Mort if allowed.

The trip started out with a few 'goblin bumps' in the road, but eventually the posse settles into action, leaving an unconscious, tied lizard behind - the other two eye the last one hesitantly, but offer no complain, even as a few carrion crows seem to gather in the twisted branches around the shipwreck.

Twitchy and Fluffer are nothing if not the quintessential scouts and guides, flying overhead back and forth, and correcting the already almost perfect direction taken by the group whenever necessary.

A few hours later, Twitchy feels it in the air - a moist smell of green, wet things, as well as another, stronger odor of burning wood - five more minutes and she begins discerning something in the distance. First she thinks a movement is spotted, then the fire from something burning in the distance - a campfire maybe? And there they are - hovel like structures, half sunken in the swamp, and greenish creatures, big and small moving all over the place.

Kinda like this

Mortimer allows Ronk to ride him. They plod on at a steady pace, even as Mortimer winces as his paws make squishy sounds in the mud and mud splashes on his beautiful coat.

That's a lot of huts... How many lizards are there? What are those big and small creatures?

Perception: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (19) + 6 = 25

Twitchy guides Fluffer with her knees in a little closer, and then hovers for a moment before going back to the others to report and get Captain Medge to throw a message spell on her. We've got to remember to do that every time we send someone to scout.

Fluffer's Hover Check (DC 15): 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (11) + 10 = 21

Nice picture, GM! Very evocative! Does Twitchy have an estimate of numbers yet, or does she need to go in closer?

With that Perception roll... ;)

Twitchy's amazing eyesight allows her to roughly perceive there should be somewhere around fifty or something lizards , plus about that many young ones, too small to be a threat of any kind.

Not all of them have the same hues - the young are a shade of much lighter green, and the bigger ones, while still being lizards, have much more prominent claws and teeth, larger muscled bodies, and are a darker green. There are about five to ten of those around that you can spot.

Most of them seem to be out and about in mundane tasks, while others are clearly of a more martial bent, moving around armed and apparently armored.

Twitchy flies back to the group.

"There are about fifty lizards back in the village, plus an equal number of young. How do we want to handle this?"

"50 is quite a number. We could bring the lizards with us, our knives at their throats, and demand to see their leader. Anyone good at pantomine? I can provide some limited props."

Ronk smiles with a slightly manic look in his eyes.Twitchy starts with a big badda Boom! Then Ronk Bonks what's left to death! He swings his bonking stick into his hand for emphasis.

"Fifty may be more than I can bomb and you can bonk... But we got fireworks and a singing cat and his pet raven! We can make big, showy entrance! Medge, what was Vorka's sister's name?"

Medge has been staring at Mort, her face screwed up as she tries to figure out what a 'Panto-mines' is. Fancy pants? Fancy pants with mines attached? Maybe he wants them to have Twitch put some bombs in pants, and then you....you get your enemy to wear the pants....

Twitchy's question catches her off guard. "Huh? Oh. Named 'Queen Mother'. Dumb name. Can do the sneaky sneaky and go looking for her. Put a bomb in her pocket like Mort wants?"

Mortimer sighs inwardly as Medge misunderstands him. Must not use too big words, next time. Nonetheless, her suggestions did give him some ideas...nasty ones.

"That's a good idea. You could also put poison in their food, while you're at it. And we should prepare some fire arrows. Most creatures aren't very organized when their houses are on fire. Do lizards see well in the dark? Else we could wait till nightfall, kill the night watch, then masaccre the entire village while they're asleep. If anyone spots us, we set their houses on fire." he says with an evil grin.

"Problem is, the good lewt is usually in the houses" and gives a regretful sigh.

''Queen Mother?" Twitchy looks thoughtful. "What is that in lizard tongue? Do you remember?"

She looks at the others. "Killing Vorka? No problem. Going after her sister? No problem. I don't even mind killing some lizards if they get uppity. But I can't and won't slaughter whole families. No."

"We don't need to speak lizard language. We just need to speak the language of the Queen Mother. If she's a goblin, we'll know. If not, we'll improvise. You got any white cloth?"

Mortimer catches onto Twitchy's idea pretty quickly, "Don't need white cloth. Just a sack, some rope or string and maybe tie it on top of Ronk's bonk stick. Colour is of no consequence, Zeli can fix that. If Ronk rides me, we should be visible enough"

Mortimer sighs, "If we're going to do it this way, I would like to beseech the great Admiral Medge to be our spokesperson. They say acting transcends all languages is understood by everyone. If we could act out what we were trying to say, it might have a good chance of working."

There was the thing about Big Words and Medge

Medge shrugs. "Don't know what it is in lizard speech. Potion made Lizard speech sounded like Gob speech to me. You want us to walk up there? Medge can signal for Queen Mother gob."