The Paladin fell because...

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Dark Archive

The Paladin fell for failing to Punish us for our failings

The paladin tithed a fifth of his earnings to his temple

The paladin fell because the minimum tithe is 42.54324323423% rounded to the nearest copper +5.

The paladin changed clothes.

... in front of a group of impressionable children.

The Paladin ate a corndog.

Such a disregard for the Paladin's own health by eating such a fattening, cholesterol-ridden snack. The paladin fell for (slowly) killing a good-aligned creature.

The paladin pelvic-thrusted at his enemies to taunt them before battle.

The Paladin fell for excessive celebration. The rules allow for only 2 pumps.

The Paladin and the Cleric had a spirited theological debate.

The paladin fell for playing devil's advocate.

The paladin and the fighter discussed the latest fighting technique in town.

Scarab Sages

The Paladin demonstrated a punch he'd learned from the Barbarian that he'd said could KO a camel with one blow and...oh. Whoops.

The Paladin and the Wizard didn't have much to talk about, but they did have a lovely sushi dinner together.

The Paladin insisted that the Wizard try some fugu, forgetting that not everyone is immune to poison.

The Paladin distracted an enemy so that the Rogue could flank them and get in a devastating sneak attack.

Dark Archive

The Paladin fell because he used the wizard as the distraction

The Paladin loved the cleric chastely.

Sadly the cleric was engaged to the rogue.

The paladin learned to play chess.

The Paladin fell because Asmodeus secretly owns every single company that sells anything related to chess. So, by buying that chess board, the Paladin supported an evil creature

The Paladin decided enough was enough and he should slaughter the beings in the worlds of the Forgotten Realms, Mystara, Athas(Dark Sun),
Eberron, Dragonlance, and Greyhawk.

The Paladin fell because he forgot to slaughter the beings in the world of Ravenloft.

The Paladin helped the Occultist track down a holy relic to return to his God's Temple.

There was a lack of communication involving whose god the relic would be returned to. The paladin fell for promoting miscommunication, and thus chaos.

The paladin wore a ridiculous chainmail bikini to battle. Even if it was a +5 Major Fortification that somehow still counted as chainmail.

Dark Archive

The paladin fell for tempting their God to lust

The paladin slew a Demon of Chaos

The paladin fell, because killing this particular Demon of Chaos means you become the next to take its place.

The paladin didn't believe in Murphey's Law.

The Paladin fell for having an adventure where nothing went wrong, thereby breaking Murphy's Law.

The Paladin and the Swashbuckler went on a nautical adventure.

...which was done on a vessel full of pirates who convinced the Paladin to join them.

The Paladin walked down the street.

Scarab Sages

There were two peanuts walking down the same street in the other direction, and one was...assaulted! Peanut. By the Paladin!

The Paladin slew a succubus by f+~@ing her until SHE died of exhaustion.

The paladin fell because he didn't use protection.

The paladin read a book by the fire.

The paladin fell, because when the fire was so comfy he fell asleep, he accidentally dropped the sacred writings into the fire.

The paladin attended a Jeff Dunham show.

Dark Archive

The paladin fell because the fire was a burning orphanage

The paladin ate some easter candy

Silver Crusade

The Paladin took the candy from a baby, and by eating it ruined the performance for others near him.

The Paladin used loaded dice.

The paladin fell because he threw them at Harkevich and lucky7 for not paying attention, so brutally that it caused holes in their skulls. :P

The paladin was promoting better treatment of the elderly.

The paladin fell because using the motto "the beatings will continue until morale improves" is not better treatment of the elderly.

The paladin installed Red Hat on his server.

The Fiend Fantastic wrote:
The paladin attended a Jeff Dunham show.

The paladin had a really annoying laugh. You know, that squaky, braying laugh that's just painful to listen to. So he fell for torturing the people around him in the audience.

zorander6 wrote:
The paladin installed Red Hat on his server.

The paladin fell for not reading every word of the software user's agreement before checking that little box, thus lying.

The paladin overworked his squire and used him to check for traps, in the sense that a stick checks for bear traps.

Silver Crusade

Guys, the Paladin ruined the Jeff Dunham show by chewing his stolen candy.

The Paladin didn't give the squire proper hazard pay.

The Paladin founded a new religion.

The paladin called his church the Church of I-O-Mad, Eh?, and fell for plagarizing another, already existing religion.

The paladin forgot to pay his power bill.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
lucky7 wrote:
Guys, the Paladin ruined the Jeff Dunham show by chewing his stolen candy.

Whoops, my bad. I deduct 50 points from myself.

The paladin fell for allowing darkness to spread. Turns out that part of his oath wasn't just figurative.

The paladin took in the goblin babies, and raised them to be law-abiding productive citizens.

The goblins misunderstood the concept of "Fire Department".

The Paladin snuck an Orb of Oblivion into the Terrask's body.

Silver Crusade

He didn't Terrask nicely before doing so.

The Paladin ruined his friend's birthday party.

The paladin fell because, as he did not know the mystery guest, who was dressed to perfection as a vampire, he cleaved the innocent guy in two.

The paladin had been scouted for the role of the latest Bond Girl.

The paladin fell because the director offered her some alcohol and she accepted.

The paladin write a movie about a paladin falling from grace.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

The paladin was a method actor, and his in depth "research" of the film caused him to fall.

The paladin went door to door selling vacuum cleaners.

Scarab Sages

The gods abhor a vacuum.

The Paladin took up the fine art of calligraphy.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

The calligraphy teacher used the necromonicon as his source material.

The paladin borrowed something blue for her wedding.

Smurfs are sentient beings, you can't just 'borrow' one!

The paladin sold his children into slavery to pay his gambling debts.

He fell double, for sins of gambling and slavery.

The paladin helped out the blacksmith (who wasn't anything evil) in polishing shields.

The Paladin fell because one of the shields that the Paladin polished to a mirror-sheen blinded several (innocent) passers-by when it was placed in direct sunlight.

The Paladin convinced a mob boss to turn himself in to the authorities to atone for his heinous crimes.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

"Shields" is the blacksmith's pet name for his manpiece, and Iomedae doesn't cotton to "helping your neighbor" that way.

The Paladin ate lightning and crapped thunder.

Silver Crusade

The Paladin craped thunder on the mob boss, thus killing a man who complied with the law.

The Paladin fought a dragon.

Scarab Sages

2 people marked this as a favorite.

For the last drumstick of fried princess.

The Paladin was strolling through the park one day, in the very merry month of May, when he was taken by surprise by a pair of roguish eyes, and in a moment his poor heart was stole away.

The Paladin wasn't skipping through the park, as is laid down in the May Bylaws for the Order of Lawful Goodness.

The Paladin helped the Medium put the spirit who haunted an old mansion to rest.

By killing the spirit's pet dog and burning it to prevent a pet cemetery from happening.

The paladin bought an orphan some new shoes.

Scarab Sages

These shoes.

The Paladin published a deliberately misleading Hungarian-English phrasebook with intent to cause a breach of the peace.

It caused over thirty seven innocent nipples to explode with delight.

The paladin dedicated himself to ending hunger in his fiefdom.

The paladin suceeded but too well, and began a pandmeic of diabeties, obesity, and overpopulation with lowered the feifdom' overall quality of life.

The Paladin smote down a genocidal tyrant and all his evil followers.

The DM decreed it to be so.

KenderKin wrote:
The DM decreed it to be so.

I don't think you understand how this game works. Watch:

The paladin fell for using smite to gain an unfair advantage.

The paladin sold some chalk to a peasants child.

Silver Crusade

The peasant child loved the chalk so much, she got white lung and died.

The Paladin ate cake in the bath.

The paladin let them eat cake....they got the diabetes....suffered and died...

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