The LGBT Gamer Community Thread.

[thejeff]

Celestial Healer wrote:

thejeff wrote:

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

Also Kansas. Their legislature just proposed a $2500 bounty for reporting transpeople in "inappropriate" bathrooms, which I guarantee with be the catalyst for all sorts of abuse beyond that of the bathroom ban itself. A financial incentive to mess with transpeople? That's just what we need.

Beyond the obvious evil stupidity of these laws, I wonder about the actual enforcement.

What evidence is required to get the $2500? Will there be authorities on hand to whom I can point out the suspected transperson? Otherwise, unless I detain them myself or know their name ahead of time, how can anything be verified? How do these idiots even think this will work?
Also, transpeople are pretty rare. Why do I suspect that a majority of complaints will be false positives? Targeting people who don't match our normal feminine or masculine standards. I bet there will be lawsuits over cis people accused of being trans and forced to prove otherwise? Sadly, something like that going public is more likely to get the law repealed than a change in attitudes towards transpeople.

The "bounty" is in the form of specified damages you can receive if you bring a suit against the entity that owns the bathroom. So not only is there a bounty, but it's structured in a way that makes progressive institutions (like colleges and universities) foot the bill for not enforcing genitalia checks.

Yeah, but practically how would it work.

Let's say I'm a bigot and I'm in the bathroom and I think the suspicious looking person washing their hands in the sink next to me is trans and I want to do something about it. How do I proceed? Do I check on the spot? Can I demand name and address? Can I just sue the university on the grounds that this person freaked me out? Without providing any actual proof or even knowing who they were? Should I stalk them until I find a cop I can report them to? I suppose I can call 911 and try to stall them until the cops show up.
What happens when, as will likely be more common than an actual transperson, it's just a cis guy who doesn't fit the gender stereotype I expect? I mean, I'm a cis guy and I don't have the faintest idea what I'd do if cops & lawyers showed up demanding proof.

I guess in the case of "Carla who lives on my dorm floor is trans and I'm freaked out by this" it's a bit more straightforward.

I guess I'm just saying in addition to being evil, the law sounds pretty unworkable.

[Drejk]

Celestial Healer wrote:

thejeff wrote:

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

Also Kansas. Their legislature just proposed a $2500 bounty for reporting transpeople in "inappropriate" bathrooms, which I guarantee with be the catalyst for all sorts of abuse beyond that of the bathroom ban itself. A financial incentive to mess with transpeople? That's just what we need.

Beyond the obvious evil stupidity of these laws, I wonder about the actual enforcement.

What evidence is required to get the $2500? Will there be authorities on hand to whom I can point out the suspected transperson? Otherwise, unless I detain them myself or know their name ahead of time, how can anything be verified? How do these idiots even think this will work?
Also, transpeople are pretty rare. Why do I suspect that a majority of complaints will be false positives? Targeting people who don't match our normal feminine or masculine standards. I bet there will be lawsuits over cis people accused of being trans and forced to prove otherwise? Sadly, something like that going public is more likely to get the law repealed than a change in attitudes towards transpeople.

The "bounty" is in the form of specified damages you can receive if you bring a suit against the entity that owns the bathroom. So not only is there a bounty, but it's structured in a way that makes progressive institutions (like colleges and universities) foot the bill for not enforcing genitalia checks.

Is there a law that requires such institutions to provide gender-specific bathrooms? If there isn't then such entities could declare their bathrooms co-ed to avoid the hassle at all...

[Haladir]

I would imagine that progressive-leaning businesses that have single-seat bathrooms could simply switch the "Men" and "Women" signs to unisex signs.

I know that many businesses in my (liberal, northeast) town have done just that.

[Paladin of Baha-who?]

Sometimes these laws prohibit gender-neutral bathrooms, too. At least I think so.

[Haladir]

And the Charlotte Observer has explicitly compared Gov. McCrory to George Wallace. Slate has an article about this.

You don't compare seated politicians to George Wallace lightly.

This, of course, reminded me of an old limerick...

There once was a redneck named Pollis
Who took possums and gators for solace.
His children had scales
And prehensile tails
And voted for Governor Wallace.

[Freehold DM]

thejeff wrote:

Celestial Healer wrote:

thejeff wrote:

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

Also Kansas. Their legislature just proposed a $2500 bounty for reporting transpeople in "inappropriate" bathrooms, which I guarantee with be the catalyst for all sorts of abuse beyond that of the bathroom ban itself. A financial incentive to mess with transpeople? That's just what we need.

Beyond the obvious evil stupidity of these laws, I wonder about the actual enforcement.

What evidence is required to get the $2500? Will there be authorities on hand to whom I can point out the suspected transperson? Otherwise, unless I detain them myself or know their name ahead of time, how can anything be verified? How do these idiots even think this will work?
Also, transpeople are pretty rare. Why do I suspect that a majority of complaints will be false positives? Targeting people who don't match our normal feminine or masculine standards. I bet there will be lawsuits over cis people accused of being trans and forced to prove otherwise? Sadly, something like that going public is more likely to get the law repealed than a change in attitudes towards transpeople.

The "bounty" is in the form of specified damages you can receive if you bring a suit against the entity that owns the bathroom. So not only is there a bounty, but it's structured in a way that makes progressive institutions (like colleges and universities) foot the bill for not enforcing genitalia checks.

Yeah, but practically how would it work.

Let's say I'm a bigot and I'm in the bathroom and I think the suspicious looking person washing their hands in the sink next to me is trans and I want to do something about it. How do I proceed? Do I check on the spot? Can I demand name and address? Can I just sue the university on the grounds that this person freaked me out? Without providing any actual proof or even knowing who they were? Should I stalk them until I find a cop I can report them to? I suppose I can call 911 and try to stall them until the cops show...

I can also see how this would encourage "concerned citizens" to get violent and attack transfolk.

[mechaPoet]

Also a fun fact to keep in mind:

Number of trans folks arrested for sexual misconduct in bathrooms: 0

Number of U.S. senators arrested for sexual misconduct in bathrooms: More than 0

Maybe senators just can't imagine not assaulting people in bathrooms. Perhaps we should put bounties on them, since there's more statistical evidence of its need.

[thejeff]

mechaPoet wrote:

Also a fun fact to keep in mind:

Number of trans folks arrested for sexual misconduct in bathrooms: 0

Number of U.S. senators arrested for sexual misconduct in bathrooms: More than 0

Maybe senators just can't imagine not assaulting people in bathrooms. Perhaps we should put bounties on them, since there's more statistical evidence of its need.

Yes, but in the minds of people supporting these laws, it's not about "transfolk" since they don't really exists. It's about guys in women's bathrooms, who obviously would only be there for some creepy purpose.

I've got some sympathy for the point of view of a woman who is surprised by what she perceives as a disguised man in the bathroom. The answer of course is education and changed attitudes, not laws banning transfolk.

[Arakhor]

I think that the only definition for the people who proposed and passed that law is filth. Why is it that so much "Christian"-inspired legislation is both un-Christian and unconstitutional?

[Bob_Loblaw]

Arakhor wrote:

I think that the only definition for the people who proposed and passed that law is filth. Why is it that so much "Christian"-inspired legislation is both un-Christian and unconstitutional?

It's very odd. I don't see much in the way of Muslims or Jews pushing for these laws even though their holy books say pretty much the same thing as the Bible on the subject.

One thing that I see happening is more and more Christians are speaking out against this. They are getting tired of being lumped in with people pushing hate. I think that's a good thing. They are using this to show that their version of Christianity is really about love and acceptance rather than what these others are doing.

I find it more interesting that the people who say they want less government in their lives push through a lot of things that get more government in people's lives. Rather than take the "live your life and I'll live my life" approach (which is what libertarians and conservatives are supposed to support), they do everything they can to ensure that they will have the government breathing down their necks for everything. What's going to happen when a masculine looking cis woman or a feminine looking cis man uses the correct bathroom? Are they going to make snap judgments? How is the situation handled at all?

I don't understand why people have to hate each other for superficial reasons. There are plenty of personal reasons to hate others.

[thejeff]

Bob_Loblaw wrote:

Arakhor wrote:

I think that the only definition for the people who proposed and passed that law is filth. Why is it that so much "Christian"-inspired legislation is both un-Christian and unconstitutional?

It's very odd. I don't see much in the way of Muslims or Jews pushing for these laws even though their holy books say pretty much the same thing as the Bible on the subject.

One thing that I see happening is more and more Christians are speaking out against this. They are getting tired of being lumped in with people pushing hate. I think that's a good thing. They are using this to show that their version of Christianity is really about love and acceptance rather than what these others are doing.

I find it more interesting that the people who say they want less government in their lives push through a lot of things that get more government in people's lives. Rather than take the "live your life and I'll live my life" approach (which is what libertarians and conservatives are supposed to support), they do everything they can to ensure that they will have the government breathing down their necks for everything. What's going to happen when a masculine looking cis woman or a feminine looking cis man uses the correct bathroom? Are they going to make snap judgments? How is the situation handled at all?

I suspect you see more Christian inspired hate legislation than Muslim or Jewish because Christians are a far more powerful legal force in the US than either Islam or Judaism. I know many Muslim countries are very harsh on LGBT people. Often far more so than the US. Israel does seem to be pretty good, but I don't know enough about the internal politics to say whether the more religious factions are opposing such rights or not.

Perhaps I'm too cynical about "small government" types, but it's always seemed a dodge to me. When you can argue an issue on its own merits, you do that. When you can't, dodge around by talking about shrinking government in general. Argue for local control when you can't control the federal government, then use the state government to override town and city laws you don't like. It's all about the actual goals: the small government junk is just there as a tool to reach your ends.

[The Usual Suspect]

Arakhor wrote:

That still requires a little thing called proof, which could be hard to come by.

More and more places have video cameras outside the restroom to watch who is coming and going. Expect that to be increased.

[Bob_Loblaw]

thejeff wrote:

I suspect you see more Christian inspired hate legislation than Muslim or Jewish because Christians are a far more powerful legal force in the US than either Islam or Judaism. I know many Muslim countries are very harsh on LGBT people. Often far more so than the US. Israel does seem to be pretty good, but I don't know enough about the internal politics to say whether the more religious factions are opposing such rights or not.

I just find it interesting that those religions could jump on the bandwagon without any backlash from the ultra conservatives, but still refuse to do so. It's almost like they want their faith to be respected.

[Arakhor]

The Usual Suspect wrote:

More and more places have video cameras outside the restroom to watch who is coming and going. Expect that to be increased.

I don't doubt that, but grainy, black-and-white CCTV footage? Even HD video won't help if it's long after the fact and the person in question isn't around to be interrogated.

[thejeff]

Arakhor wrote:

The Usual Suspect wrote:

More and more places have video cameras outside the restroom to watch who is coming and going. Expect that to be increased.

I don't doubt that, but grainy, black-and-white CCTV footage? Even HD video won't help if it's long after the fact and the person in question isn't around to be interrogated.

I assume you'd have to use the security footage to id the person and verify their status.

It's really mostly going to be an issue in cases where the people know each other - fellow employees or college dorms, things like that. Otherwise, practically impossible to track down the person unless you detain them on the spot.
That and a huge deterrent effect, as transfolk avoid using any bathrooms in public for fear of suits. Few actual suits, but much trouble for transfolk.

Another aspect: Those transfolk who obey the law and use the restrooms that match the gender they were assigned at birth are also likely to be reported, since they won't match the expectations of the bigots.

[Arakhor]

thejeff wrote:

Another aspect: Those transfolk who obey the law and use the restrooms that match the gender they were assigned at birth are also likely to be reported, since they won't match the expectations of the bigots.

Something like this, you mean? I'd certainly be nonplussed if he walked into the ladies' room.

[Deadmanwalking]

thejeff wrote:

Perhaps I'm too cynical about "small government" types, but it's always seemed a dodge to me. When you can argue an issue on its own merits, you do that. When you can't, dodge around by talking about shrinking government in general. Argue for local control when you can't control the federal government, then use the state government to override town and city laws you don't like. It's all about the actual goals: the small government junk is just there as a tool to reach your ends.

Speaking as an actual libertarian, this is not true of most people who are actually, for example, part of the Libertarian Party, or otherwise serious libertarians. Some of them are in other ways unpleasant (though I think they get a bit of a bad rap from association, see below), but if they didn't believe in the principle itself pretty strongly, they'd go be part of something more mainstream and powerful.

Speaking of which, the Republican Party is absolutely doing exactly this when they talk about small government. Or most of them are anyway. So...I actually agree with you as far as mainstream politics go. The use of this concept is all for advantage, not out of any real conviction.

I frankly think a lot of people make all sorts of assumptions about libertarianism, not because of an problems with the ideology or people who actually support it but because social conservatives coopt the rhetoric and concepts of libertarianism to their own ends, and actual libertarians lack a public forum to refute this sort of thing.

Now, there are certainly people who are legitimately libertarian and deeply unpleasant, but no more than any other political ideology, and one of the advantages of real libertarians is that even if they think abortion, gay marriage, and women going to school are abominations before the Lord, they won't try and make laws against them, since doing so sorta definitionally means they weren't really libertarians in the first place.

[thejeff]

Deadmanwalking wrote:

thejeff wrote:

Perhaps I'm too cynical about "small government" types, but it's always seemed a dodge to me. When you can argue an issue on its own merits, you do that. When you can't, dodge around by talking about shrinking government in general. Argue for local control when you can't control the federal government, then use the state government to override town and city laws you don't like. It's all about the actual goals: the small government junk is just there as a tool to reach your ends.

Speaking as an actual libertarian, this is not true of most people who are actually, for example, part of the Libertarian Party, or otherwise serious libertarians. Some of them are in other ways unpleasant (though I think they get a bit of a bad rap from association, see below), but if they didn't believe in the principle itself pretty strongly, they'd go be part of something more mainstream and powerful.

Speaking of which, the Republican Party is absolutely doing exactly this when they talk about small government. Or most of them are anyway. So...I actually agree with you as far as mainstream politics go. The use of this concept is all for advantage, not out of any real conviction.

I frankly think a lot of people make all sorts of assumptions about libertarianism, not because of an problems with the ideology or people who actually support it but because social conservatives coopt the rhetoric and concepts of libertarianism to their own ends, and actual libertarians lack a public forum to refute this sort of thing.

Now, there are certainly people who are legitimately libertarian and deeply unpleasant, but no more than any other political ideology, and one of the advantages of real libertarians is that even if they think abortion, gay marriage, and women going to school are abominations before the Lord, they won't try and make laws against them, since doing so sorta definitionally means they weren't really libertarians in the first place.

Frankly, I'd say that most people who call themselves libertarians vote Republican. Those who actually walk the walk get a little more credit from me, even when I disagree with them.

[Deadmanwalking]

thejeff wrote:

Frankly, I'd say that most people who call themselves libertarians vote Republican. Those who actually walk the walk get a little more credit from me, even when I disagree with them.

There's a reason I never used the phrase 'call themselves libertarian' in my description of actual libertarians. Actual libertarians certainly often call themselves such...but a lot of other people use that term, too.

[Rosita the Riveter]

I think that Libertarian has become as much a nebulous and nondescriptive phrase as Socialist. So many people accept differing meanings of the word that you can't just say it and have everyone picture the same concept.

[Rosita the Riveter]

You know, I miss the old Homosexuality in Golarion Thread. Used to be that somebody'd roll up and whinge about Paizo forcing gays down their throats or ranting about sex in RPGs or about the children or whatever, we'd roll up and mock them for being bigoted, we'd slap each other around for a while, and the mods would come tell us to start talking about Golarion and delete all the entertaining bigoted posts, sometimes before I could read them. Then we'd do it all over again a couple weeks later. It was all great fun. Now we don't get away with that behavior anymore.

[doctor_wu]

mechaPoet wrote:

Also a fun fact to keep in mind:

Number of trans folks arrested for sexual misconduct in bathrooms: 0

Number of U.S. senators arrested for sexual misconduct in bathrooms: More than 0

Maybe senators just can't imagine not assaulting people in bathrooms. Perhaps we should put bounties on them, since there's more statistical evidence of its need.

Also wouldn't being trans make bathroom sex so much wierder assuming you do not know thNumber of U.S. senators arrested for sexual misconduct in bathrooms: More than 0

e person. If you do know the person why not find a better place. Wouldn't putting mtf trans people in a mens restroom result in more cases of wierdness.

If you have a problem of cis men going into womens bathrooms to do things and the internet and how people say there is so much porn. Isn't this an access to broadband internet problem not only on cell phone stuff that so many developing countries only have.

[Pillbug Toenibbler]

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

...It was all great fun...

"You and I remember Budapest fun very differently." -- Hawkeye, Avengers

[Rosita the Riveter]

Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

...It was all great fun...

"You and I remember Budapest fun very differently." -- Hawkeye, Avengers

It's all about the glory of the battle, mate. I sure don't want the rights-poor days of 2008 back, but I do miss the epic battles back when homophobes were mainstream. Ironically enough, Putin explains it best. If you don't miss the glorious combat around Prop 8, you havw no heart. If you want it back, you have no brain.

[Pillbug Toenibbler]

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

...It was all great fun...

"You and I remember Budapest fun very differently." -- Hawkeye, Avengers

It's all about the glory of the battle, mate. I sure don't want the rights-poor days of 2008 back, but I do miss the epic battles back when homophobes were mainstream. Ironically enough, Putin explains it best. If you don't miss the glorious combat around Prop 8, you havw no heart. If you want it back, you have no brain.

I certainly don't want it back, but I don't miss it either. The fight around Prop 8/Obergefell v. Hodges hasn't significantly progressed LGBT equality elsewhere, like employment opportunities, medical care, housing, higher education, financial/loan opportunities, and harassment/violence/suicides/murders. The War is far from won, or even over. I have far better things to do with my limited energy/spoons than waste it on Internet arguments with people who can't be reasoned out of their hateful/illogical anti-LGBT positions. :/

[Wei Ji the Learner]

It is EXCEEDINGLY important to note that the transgender discussion/battle is only beginning, especially with the advancement of genetic, transgenic, and other means of altering people.

There will be several stages in this discussion, those on the forefront now are the pioneers... and the survival rate of pioneers... wasn't that great.

That DOESN'T stop the reason for pioneering, though!

[Hrothdane]

The safe choice is always to keep your head down and not rock the boat. It also means nothing will ever change.

[Rosita the Riveter]

Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

...It was all great fun...

"You and I remember Budapest fun very differently." -- Hawkeye, Avengers

It's all about the glory of the battle, mate. I sure don't want the rights-poor days of 2008 back, but I do miss the epic battles back when homophobes were mainstream. Ironically enough, Putin explains it best. If you don't miss the glorious combat around Prop 8, you havw no heart. If you want it back, you have no brain.

I certainly don't want it back, but I don't miss it either. The fight around Prop 8/Obergefell v. Hodges hasn't significantly progressed LGBT equality elsewhere, like employment opportunities, medical care, housing, higher education, financial/loan opportunities, and harassment/violence/suicides/murders. The War is far from won, or even over. I have far better things to do with my limited energy/spoons than waste it on Internet arguments with people who can't be reasoned out of their hateful/illogical anti-LGBT positions. :/

I dunno. I feel like the bigots got such a drubbing over the last three years that it's mostly "well intentioned moderates/anti-SJWs" and trolls who remain. Internet fights over LGBT rights just don't have the same vigor and verve to them any more. We may not have won the war, but our glorious, hard fought charges have settled into a grinding advance, and it's just not as exhilarating as it once was.

[The Doomkitten]

A minor victory recently, if a sad one.

My stepdad is, undoubtedly, the person that made me a geek and proud of it. He introduced to me D&D. He got me into videogames. He got both of us double-teaming on Mom to buy us Lego. He is a jovial, kind, over-all absolutely amazing person. No bigotry at all.

And yet he doesn't understand that I'm a girl.

I tried to talking to him numerous times. He always deflected the issue. I tried to press it. He got angry. Not bigoted, it's just that he didn't understand that I wasn't his "son." He refuses to accept it.

Recently, the fights between him and my mom (who is completely supportive), have been reaching catastrophic proportions. That, and the landlord is giving us till Summer Vacation to clear out, has forced to decision.

My stepdad isn't coming with my Mom and I.

Luckily, he isn't technically legally my stepdad, so no custody troubles. But damn, it hurts. He's been a fixture in my life for the past ten years, always there to lend an ear, to help out, to geek out. Without him, I wouldn't even be here on Paizo, pouring my heart out. But the fact is, there's just nothing left between him and my mom.

So yeah, it sucks. But now, since we're going separate ways (and away from the burly Hispanic roommate who could beat me if he found out I was trans), I finally feel comfortable enough to transition. Next session with my therapist, I'm going to push her to set things in motion for anti-androgens, working with the school, estrogen, etc. And that's going to be so liberating, and it'll probably be what carries me through when he leaves.

It sucks. But there's a bit of hope there too.

[Rosita the Riveter]

Wei Ji the Learner wrote:

It is EXCEEDINGLY important to note that the transgender discussion/battle is only beginning, especially with the advancement of genetic, transgenic, and other means of altering people.

There will be several stages in this discussion, those on the forefront now are the pioneers... and the survival rate of pioneers... wasn't that great.

That DOESN'T stop the reason for pioneering, though!

We just need a better ambassador than Caitlyn Jenner.

[Pillbug Toenibbler]

Hrothdane wrote:

The safe choice is always to keep your head down and not rock the boat. It also means nothing will ever change.

Yeah, working to change the system and society is a valid laudable goal. I'm actually for reasoned civilized conversation; I just don't think engaging with trolls and entrenched bigots on the Internet achieves anything positive, and often it just seems to encourage them the tilt at "SJWs" and LGBT people all the more. I come to places like Paizo to take a break from all the real-world crap, maybe lower my defenses a bit, and get my minimal RDA of interaction with genuine humans.

[Hrothdane]

Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

Hrothdane wrote:

The safe choice is always to keep your head down and not rock the boat. It also means nothing will ever change.

Yeah, working to change the system and society is a valid laudable goal. I'm actually for reasoned civilized conversation; I just don't think engaging with trolls and entrenched bigots on the Internet achieves anything positive, and often it just seems to encourage them the tilt at "SJWs" and LGBT people all the more. I come to places like Paizo to take a break from all the real-world crap, maybe lower my defenses a bit, and get my minimal RDA of interaction with genuine humans.

Oh, absolutely. No arguments here! My comment was meant more as a support of Wei Ji's general statement that we need to pioneer even though it's risky.

[Ambrosia Slaad]

The Doomkitten wrote:

A minor victory recently, if a sad one...

I'm so sorry. I've heard it said that transitioning is a difficult journey for family and friends too, and they can't all make it at the same rate. Hopefully, with a bit of time and thought, he can better mentally meet with you where you're at and accept who you really all. Especially once he sees how much happier you are living authentically.

I'm very glad your mom is so accepting. {hugs}

[Amby's Brain]

This is a weird discussion to have while flipping between aliases.

[Rosita the Riveter]

Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

Hrothdane wrote:

The safe choice is always to keep your head down and not rock the boat. It also means nothing will ever change.

Yeah, working to change the system and society is a valid laudable goal. I'm actually for reasoned civilized conversation; I just don't think engaging with trolls and entrenched bigots on the Internet achieves anything positive, and often it just seems to encourage them the tilt at "SJWs" and LGBT people all the more. I come to places like Paizo to take a break from all the real-world crap, maybe lower my defenses a bit, and get my minimal RDA of interaction with genuine humans.

I just like fighting. Especially when the other side doesn't want to support basic human rights. Then I don't have to feel bad about being mean.

[Kalindlara]

I miss some of those discussions, not for the bigots themselves, but for the warm feeling of seeing everyone stand up to them. It made this community feel more welcoming than any other, and was part of the reason I eventually started posting here. (I don't feel comfortable on most sites.)

Now, I'm well on my way to both transitioning and being published. The latter has already started, between Aethera and an upcoming Player Companion, while the former was helped along by this very thread (and some supportive friends here, both Paizo staff and otherwise). So... thank you for that. ^_^

[Ambrosia Slaad]

Kalindlara wrote:

Now, I'm well on my way to both transitioning and being published. The latter has already started, between Aethera and an upcoming Player Companion, while the former was helped along by this very thread (and some supportive friends here, both Paizo staff and otherwise). So... thank you for that. ^_^

Wha-?! AWESOME! Congrats, soon many many more will know of your creativity and ingeniousness! Too bad there's probably an NDA and you can't talk about it yet.

[Rosita the Riveter]

Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

The Doomkitten wrote:

A minor victory recently, if a sad one...

I'm so sorry. I've heard it said that transitioning is a difficult journey for family and friends too, and they can't all make it at the same rate. Hopefully, with a bit of time and thought, he can better mentally meet with you where you're at and accept who you really all. Especially once he sees how much happier you are living authentically.

I'm very glad your mom is so accepting. {hugs}

Friends and family can hurt you a lot deeper than strangers. The closer younare, the worse it is. My grandmother's been there. Gave me a place to stay through two years of community college, gave me large loans when I needed them, let me come over out of the blue on Thursday when I called the cops on my roommate and didn't feel comfortable at home, and more. She also really dislikes transgendered people. Considers their existence a slap in the face to everything feminists fought for in the 60s and 70s. Pretty big factor in me not wanting to come out.

[Freehold DM]

Rosita the Riveter wrote:

Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

The Doomkitten wrote:

A minor victory recently, if a sad one...

I'm so sorry. I've heard it said that transitioning is a difficult journey for family and friends too, and they can't all make it at the same rate. Hopefully, with a bit of time and thought, he can better mentally meet with you where you're at and accept who you really all. Especially once he sees how much happier you are living authentically.

I'm very glad your mom is so accepting. {hugs}

Friends and family can hurt you a lot deeper than strangers.

the ones we love hurt us most.

[Freehold DM]

Kalindlara wrote:

Now, I'm well on my way to both transitioning and being published. The latter has already started, between Aethera and an upcoming Player Companion, while the former was helped along by this very thread (and some supportive friends here, both Paizo staff and otherwise). So... thank you for that. ^_^

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[Rysky]

Congratz Kali! ^w^

*still upset about missing the Kickstarter...*

[Hrothdane]

Yay, Kali! I'm so happy for you! *hugs*

[Lilith]

Rysky wrote:

Congratz Kali! ^w^

*still upset about missing the Kickstarter...*

You'll have a chance to get Aethera post-Kickstarter. ;)

[Rysky]

Lilith wrote:

Rysky wrote:

Congratz Kali! ^w^

*still upset about missing the Kickstarter...*

You'll have a chance to get Aethera post-Kickstarter. ;)

*rolls eyes*

Well of course I can, and will, get it post-Kickstarter silly :3

Just like when I don't have anyone to go watch an awesome movie with and have to wait for it to come out on Blu-Ray or tv...

[Rysky]

Lilith wrote:

Rysky wrote:

Congratz Kali! ^w^

*still upset about missing the Kickstarter...*

You'll have a chance to get Aethera post-Kickstarter. ;)

Slightly less sour response:

There's a difference between buying someone's dream, hard work, and effort, and helping make that dream, hard work, and effort into reality.

[Haladir]

Congrats, Kalindlara!

I'm a KS backer of Aethera: I'm really looking forward to this when it ships!

I haven't met Robert Brookes in person, but I met him online when we were both playing in a PbP on the Paizo boards, GMed by Mike Kimmel (an RPGSS finalist the same year as Robert.) He also lives a stone's throw from where I grew up!

[The Usual Suspect]

The Doomkitten wrote:

A minor victory recently, if a sad one.

...

That stinks Doomkitten; but I understand how it happens. Hopefully your step-dad will eventually sort out his problems and come to realize that just because you are not the awesome son he though he had that you really are his awesome daughter; and that's a good thing. If he can't make that leap, wish him well and let him go. The rest of us are here for you if you need us.

[Drejk]

And the s*** hits the fan, as the last year elected parliament with "conservative" majority (getting votes of about 14-15% of the Poland's population or about 19% of eligible votes, only a little more than half of the people went to vote) begins a full-scale assault on women's rights...

>protest against incoming change to (anti)abortion law<.

There are also known proposals by anti-LGBT groups to eliminate some clauses from criminal code that currently allow homosexual folks to refuse testifying against their partners (it will also affect heterosexual pairs to a certain degree) and change other regulations to make (already not so rainbows and unicorns) everyday life for homosexual folks difficult...

[The Usual Suspect]

Time to start taking about something fun for a while;

Who in the LGBTQA community going to any of the big cons this year? I'm signed up as a Tier 1 GM at Gen-Con again (yes, I am a glutton for punishment).

[Kalindlara]

I'm hoping to make it to PaizoCon. Mostly to meet a lot of people, including the Aethera team. ^_^