Your wish is granted! You don't HAVE to work so late, so consitently, you NEED to or you will be fired.
I wish I wrote the songs that made the whole world sing.
RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16
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Your wish is granted! The whole world sings. Sonic vibrations cause seismic disturbances in the Earth's crust, resulting in a cycle of devastating tsunamis, volcanoes, earthquakes, and, ultimately, an Alderaan-like planetary explosion.
I wish I had a coffee pot in my office.
Your wish is granted! You ate Snow White's poisoned apple by mistake and fall into a permanent sleep that can only be broken by a kiss from Prince Charming, and that ain't gonna happen.
I wish I was smarter.
Your wish is granted! The moon falls on you.
I wish I saw what you did there.
Your wish is Granted, you are standing beside him when the moon crashes on you.
I wish my eyeball avatar wasn't so bloodshot.
Your wish is granted, you have 2 dozen Oompa Loompas, but they hate you and will take over your crime syndicate any day now.
I wish I didn't have to deal with so many idiots.
Your wish is granted, you just got a frontal lobotomy!
I wish my DM would just let us play pathfinder, instead of going oh...wouldn't it be cool if armor was DR and here's the new skill list, you don't have skill points anymore, just class, trained and untrained skills, thereby killing the rogue even deader as a usable class.
*TIME PARADOX!*
You and your wish don't exist.
I wish for nice weather this weekend wherever I am and where the person who posts after me is.
Your wish is granted!
No one at your meetings will object to being orally-serviced by you. And now your meetings will probably take longer. Unless you're exceptionally-skilled...
;-) <-- me
:-O <-- you at your meeting
I wish I were Emma Frost.
Your wish is granted! you are turned into a comic book.
I wish I was an Oscar Myer weiner
You are turned into a wiener dog named Oscar Meyer.
I wish I had a sno cone machine.
Your wish is granted, unfortunately you lose a bet and cannot play Pathfinder for 3 years.
I wish I could afford to upgrade my office.
Bacon is now twice as delicious, so the stores all sell out of it before you get there.
I wish I knew what to do with all this bacon I just bought.
Your wish is my command!
Your monitor hits you square in the face with a cone of cold as cast by a 15th-level wizard. Make a Reflex save.
I took cold damage
Reflex save: I made my save (phew that was close... Except you staggered me...)
Granted, but it doesn't like you and proceeds to dash back into the television series
I wish someone could cast Cure Moderate Wounds on me.
Your wish is granted but I rolled like crap and you get 2 points. And a wild surge causes you to never heal anymore.
I wish to have all nice people to deal with today.
Ok, I wish TMB would make a wish...
Your wish is granted but I rolled like crap and you get 2 points. And a wild surge causes you to never heal anymore.
How'd you heal 2 with a caster level of 3? shouldn't it be at least 5?
^Granted, you now have a pet pink dragon, whom just has an insatiable love for you... He then proceeds to eat all of your friends and future girl/boy friends. Also, he spontaneously combusts when you tell him not to eat your friends. Wouldn't you know, it's weakness is not eating friends... Oh and it did it behind your back.
I wish I had a Wish spell that doesn't disappear the instant I get it, whether it could have been my fault or someone (or something) else's fault.
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Granted with gusto!
One morning, in a fit of frustration with some local D&D-hating clergyman, you scream to yourself, "Will no one rid us of this meddlesome priest?" Your dragon hears you, and, not actually knowing which specific priest you're referring to, dutifully incinerates the Archbishop of Canterbury. Now YOU, being known worldwide as the only owner of a dragon, are being hunted by witch-hunters, soldiers, and Chaucer-enthusiasts.
Oww, "ninja'd"!
Ok, YOU get a piece of paper telling you, with excruciating thoroughness, how to spell the word "wish."
I wish everyday plants could move around at speeds visible to the human eye and generally behave similarly to various sorts of animals.
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Wish granted very silently.
Plants now move at speeds visible to the human eye and generally behave similarly to various sorts of animals. They move at speeds equal to 2-inches a year after growing. They also behave similarly to animals of the feline species, but really slowly.
I wish I could kill all pirates.
Granted, a bunch of people die. And that guy and that guy. Oh I died too. Oh did you steal anything? You died too. Oh, I think a lot of people in the industry died too. I think maybe some people in governments did too. I think a large portion of China died too. And the real pirates. And the fake pirates... Oh heck, everyone has the potential to be a pirate *everyone dies*
I wish someone started (and subsequently finished) researching a True Resurrection, Mass spell after what just happened.
Granted! You may want to see your doctor soon-ish.
I wish I would stop getting "ninja'd" on the forums.
No problem. You are banned from the forums, and ninjas show up in real life and take credit for every good idea you would have ever come up with.
I wish I had enough money to retire.
Congrats a bank error accidently deposits a large sum of mob money into your bank acount. The FBI will be calling you later today.
I wish I could actully get around to going back to school and getting my Law Degree.
Granted, you go back to school for your Law degree, it has been on a shelf for several years waiting. BUT the rules have changed and it is only valid in Cuba.
I wish I wasn't so tired.