{snipped for brevity}
That ... was creepy gamer stereotype, original. Is it possible that all creepy gamers are actually clones of this individual? Is it plausible that the entire stereotype came into being from this one person drifting from convention to convention, blown by the winds of fate to spread his taint to table after table?
Not likely, but my sanity hurts to think there are more than one of them out there, so I shall cling to my illusions ...
{snipped for brevity}That ... was creepy gamer stereotype, original. Is it possible that all creepy gamers are actually clones of this individual? Is it plausible that the entire stereotype came into being from this one person drifting from convention to convention, blown by the winds of fate to spread his taint to table after table?
Not likely, but my sanity hurts to think there are more than one of them out there, so I shall cling to my illusions ...
Clones? No, the correct term is spawn. It's like with many Pathfinder undead: They have horror-based attacks that drain your wisdom, life force, your very sanity. If you succumb to these wounds and die, you raise as one of them a short time later.
These gamer creeps are the same: They scar you, they sap your sanity and will to live (to actually live, like a human being and part of society, not just vegetating) and then you turn into one of them and spread the misery further.
{snipped for brevity}That ... was creepy gamer stereotype, original. Is it possible that all creepy gamers are actually clones of this individual? Is it plausible that the entire stereotype came into being from this one person drifting from convention to convention, blown by the winds of fate to spread his taint to table after table?
Not likely, but my sanity hurts to think there are more than one of them out there, so I shall cling to my illusions ...
I know not the answers to these questions, my friend. I only know that the next time I saw him at a convention, he was once again trying to get into a Cybergeneration game, and used my name as a reference to the GM as proof he was cool to play with. I promptly called the GM over and disavowed the player. He hasn't tried to game with me since then, but man, the dirty dirty looks he used to shoot me in passing...
{snipped for brevity}That ... was creepy gamer stereotype, original. Is it possible that all creepy gamers are actually clones of this individual? Is it plausible that the entire stereotype came into being from this one person drifting from convention to convention, blown by the winds of fate to spread his taint to table after table?
Not likely, but my sanity hurts to think there are more than one of them out there, so I shall cling to my illusions ...
Clones? No, the correct term is spawn. It's like with many Pathfinder undead: They have horror-based attacks that drain your wisdom, life force, your very sanity. If you succumb to these wounds and die, you raise as one of them a short time later.
These gamer creeps are the same: They scar you, they sap your sanity and will to live (to actually live, like a human being and part of society, not just vegetating) and then you turn into one of them and spread the misery further.
There is a cure to their malady: Brain Bleach! Sear the existence of this horror from your neurons, and you may get to keep some of them intact and will no longer spread the contagion.
I know not the answers to these questions, my friend. I only know that the next time I saw him at a convention, he was once again trying to get into a Cybergeneration game, and used my name as a reference to the GM as proof he was cool to play with. I promptly called the GM over and disavowed the player. He hasn't tried to game with me since then, but man, the dirty dirty looks he used to shoot me in passing...{snipped for brevity}That ... was creepy gamer stereotype, original. Is it possible that all creepy gamers are actually clones of this individual? Is it plausible that the entire stereotype came into being from this one person drifting from convention to convention, blown by the winds of fate to spread his taint to table after table?
Not likely, but my sanity hurts to think there are more than one of them out there, so I shall cling to my illusions ...
Yes, people don't like it when you don't fulfil their fantasies - in this case, the fantasy that his erotic fantasies of RPGs make him a good gamer ...
sadly there have been a fair few groups that i have made a dashing and daring escape from, although on that same note i have been part of groups that have made dashing and daring escapes from players before as well.
there is one ex player of mine who sticks out in my mind though. i started a very heavy role-play but tounge in cheek campaign, the kind of campaign where if you get knocked unconcious the goblins are likely to nick your stuff and leg it. anyway this fella, lets call him Mat, hears about it and asks to join in. i figured i could use another player or two so i said yeh sure.
the first session he is in he turns up with binder. i tell him that he has to keep this on the quiet or he is likely to get hunted down. he says ok then imidietly starts lording it over everyone because he has a power that they don't know about. his use of this power however threatens the party's safty so when he sneaks out of the camp one morning he gets followed by the party's rouge who sees him binding what looks to him like a deamon. when mat returns to the camp, plus glowing eyes, fiery mouth and horns, the party freak and hold him at sword point to explain himself. rather than come clean or do something smart he insults everyone els in the party and claims "i have a deal with beings far more powerfull than any of your god's" and draws breath to breath fire on the party. the party's paladin takes offence to this and beheads him.
the second session he turns up with a truenamer. yet again he lords it over the party with yet another unknown power. yet again his flaunting puts the party in danger and his lack of forethought gets the party arrested after burning down the inn. the party's rouge breaks in to the prison and breaks the party out except for Mat, who he leaves to be hanged for arson in the morning.
the third session he turns up with a barbarian. i'm thinking "hopefully he will calm down" saddly my hopes were not realised. he breaks open a door that was holding back a horde of undead putting everyone in danger. the rest of the party flees, he gats sifted through the wall by an earth elimental.
the fourth session he turns up with a cleric of law. the party are in a tournemant and Mat ends up against the party's ranger. he gets beaten. Mat being a sore looser goes into the stables after the match and kills the ranger's horse and animal companion. the party still debates over which one of them killed him this time but he didn't wake up the next day.
after four sessions and four characters i told him not to bother coming back.
after four sessions and four characters i told him not to bother coming back.
It took four sessions? You have the patience of a saint.
after four sessions and four characters i told him not to bother coming back.It took four sessions? You have the patience of a saint.
comes from dealing with kids on a day to day basis.
Nothing wrong with a little home brew and some wild game :)
Hmmm, washing down wild turkey WITH Wild Turkey?
Hmmm, washing down wild turkey WITH Wild Turkey?
I like your style!
Nothing wrong with a little home brew and some wild game :)Hmmm, washing down wild turkey WITH Wild Turkey?
Nice.
[snippity-doo-dah!]
after four sessions and four characters i told him not to bother coming back.
Wow. That is awesomely hilarious. That reminds me of some players I've had to deal with (one in particular who was so bad at playing he either ended up getting killed or knocked out in every encounter, often by his "teammates"). Luckily, our current group is comprised of players with, you know, more than half a brain. They still do crazy, stupid things from time to time, but it's all in the name of escapist fun.
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My story, while not as horrific as some of the others, is actually quite entertaining.
My buddy, We'll call him "A",got back from the "Big Sandbox" and was itching to play some 3.5 DND. We found a group, we'll call the "B", "C" and "D", that was more than willing to play. I told them my rules, which are as follows.
1) 4d6, throw out lowest
2) Core classes/races only, lvl 3
3) No Evil, the game was meant to be a heroes save world.
"A" makes a CG Elf Rogue who he made to be a flanker. He followed the cash rules from the DMG and made a pretty good PC.
"D" makes himself a LG dwarf battle cleric (as if there are any other kind! :P). Same thing, pretty good PC.
"B" & "C" decide to ignore my rules and make a NG Fire Giant Barbarian with a str of 35 and a CG teifling wizard with an int of 23. They just spent whatever they wanted to get the items they want. (EX: the wizard had a staff of power....o_O). Immediatly I saw them as the EXTREME version of Power Gamers.
The 2 of them throw my game off. "B" & "C" killed anything that they came across. Villains, NPC's....TOWNS. Yes, I said towns. A barmaid refused "B's" advances and he got mad, destroyed the bar and "B" & "C" decimated the town and the LG Dwarf.
So, being the vindictive SOAB I am, I decided that by the time they hit 5rd level, they angered the wizards collective they were working for so bad, that they summoned an Epic Level Wizard Celestial Angel to capture/dispatch them. The fight lasted 3 rounds, and only because the Angel gave them a chance to surrender first. ;)
"B" & "C" decide to ignore my rules and make a NG Fire Giant Barbarian with a str of 35 and a CG teifling wizard with an int of 23. They just spent whatever they wanted to get the items they want. (EX: the wizard had a staff of power....o_O). Immediatly I saw them as the EXTREME version of Power Gamers.
I don't understand why you'd let them play characters that broke your character generation rules in the first place. In any game I've ever run or played in, if a player broke the rules (especially so blatantly) they weren't allowed to play until they did it right.
Allowing them to play those characters pretty much fried your campaign from the get go.
It was only one game. They went through the 3 months of session I had planned becuase they kept killing everything and I told them to remake their PC's. They refused, so I offed them in the best way possible. ;)
My bad, I probably should have been more clear. No breakfast yet.
I think the best way possible would be a blue bolt - roll every die at the session and add them. They take that much damage.
It was only one game. They went through the 3 months of session I had planned becuase they kept killing everything and I told them to remake their PC's. They refused, so I offed them in the best way possible. ;)
My bad, I probably should have been more clear. No breakfast yet.
That's not how it's supposed to work.
Let me show you an example of how it should work:
Players *bring ridiculously overpowered concepts to table*
GM: "These break about a killion of the rules and guidelines I told you apply. Make new characters
Players: "No, we refuse."
GM: "Make new characters that comply to the rules. I won't say that again."
Players: "No, we re-AAAARGH THE PAIN THE PAIN MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP PLEASE KILL ME RELEASE MY SOUL FROM TORMENT-will certainly make new characters!
GM: "Good. Now that you are nice, I shall be nice as well. I don't think I need this "Smurf Metal Christmas" CD anymore. What do you think?"
Players: "NO! WE BEHAVE WE BEHAVE EVERYTHING BUT THAT SONIC TORTURE!"
If you think they'd actually get off on smurf metal christmas, use another sort of torture. Reading great world literature using silly voices, letting them be ripped apart by wild tortoises, painting them green and throwing them into the Rabbit Pit, whatever. If you need ideas, contact me.
I can just see this happening at my table...
ME: "Make a core-only, non-evil character."
PLAYER: "Fire giant, bam!"
ME: "Uh huh. Now make a core-only, non-evil character."
PLAYER: "No, fire giant."
ME: "Fine, YOU run the campaign."
-The Gneech
"Smurf Metal Christmas"
You... you evil evil man! How dare you blaspheme against... all that is pure and good and metal in this world!
Very well... I shall play a Dwarf Drunken Rager Barbarian.
"Smurf Metal Christmas"You... you evil evil man!
Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.
Of course, I'm cruel to be cruel, all the time, but I just wanted to say this.
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I originally used to let evil characters into my games. I had one player who, when playing evil, would abandon the group as soon as it become a rough situation, and then would have to make a new character.
Seriously though, someone shows up to my game and broke the expressed rules? My response is short and sweet: "Make a new character who follows the rules or recommend a new player who will"
Only time I ever walked out of a game was several years back playing 2nd Edition. The rogue of the group was playing a thug who talked about rape and child molestation way too much. To the point where the GM finally called him on it and then things got awkward...
I remember sitting there looking at the GM who obviously was as uncomfortable with the rogues "role-playing" as myself. Then I just stood up grabbed my dice and walked out of the room. By the time I got to the end of the hallway more than half the party was walking with me including the rogues ride home.
Still gives me the creeps...
To this day, whenever they contact me, they ask if I've eaten anymore sea-elves lately.
Have you?
... after four sessions and four characters ...
He went through four characters in four sessions?
What an amateur.
Due to bad dice rolls, I've gone through four characters in ONE session!
... after four sessions and four characters ...He went through four characters in four sessions?
What an amateur.
Due to bad dice rolls, I've gone through four characters in ONE session!
Yeh, one of my players is like that. Well, I should say, he had one night like that - Castle Rvenloft (3.5). Eight characters. Four hours. By the end I'd stopped narrating new character entrances and just started putting his new characters in treasure chests and broom closets.
Yeh, one of my players is like that. Well, I should say, he had one night like that - Castle Rvenloft (3.5). Eight characters. Four hours. By the end I'd stopped narrating new character entrances and just started putting his new characters in treasure chests and broom closets.... after four sessions and four characters ...He went through four characters in four sessions?
What an amateur.
Due to bad dice rolls, I've gone through four characters in ONE session!
About 2 months ago I finished up running a 14 month campaign that spanned from level 5 to level 17. One player died, EVERY session at least once - even on the sessions which was intended to have little or no combat. He was simply adept at it. And it was ALWAYS due to his own action (the grimlocks charge you; "I cast greater mirror image"; the grimlocks don't seem to notice), or lack their of ("It's just a medusa, I'm not going to run from it, I can take it no problem!"); very little "bad luck/rolls" was involved. It became a chore at lower levels to introduce a new character every session (especially when he wanted to have some detailed story arch built around his character with a massive backstory that he attempted to grant himself great wealth or ability boons with for each). I had to take a very ham-fisted approach to shunting him into the party. Finally they got to a level where they could raise the dead on a regular basis, and from then on a good chunk of his wealth was spent on material components for spells to do so. The only other deaths that happened during the campaign were when the Warmage was sure that his Druid friend would survive his Lightning Bolt and when the other Druid attempted to pick a fight (alone) with a Necromancer meant to be a challenge for the entire party 6 PC's.
One player died, EVERY session at least once - even on the sessions which was intended to have little or no combat. He was simply adept at it. And it was ALWAYS due to his own action (snip) ...or lack thereof...
(snip...)
Finally they got to a level where they could raise the dead on a regular basis, and from then on a good chunk of his wealth was spent on material components for spells to do so.
It's appropriate for the gods to give PCs of that sort a bulk discount on their raise dead spells.
GM: "As Sir BadIdee rises from the bier, his life restored to him, several diamonds fall to the ground around him, appearing as from nothingness."
Sir Badidee's Player: "Why are gems falling around me?"
GM: "Father Patiente answers: 'Your change, milord.'"
Example: A 5th Level Pirate stole the PCs shipment worth 100k. The PCs who are 5th Level can handle it themselves, or they can hire a crew of 8th Level Mercs that guaranteed to get the job done for 150k.
If I were a player in a case like that, I'd call foul- unless, of course, you're letting the PCs earn 150k at 8th level by being merceneries. Don't make something cost-prohibitive unless there's a reason. The players being clever and earning money legitimately should indeed have challenges rather than being automatically successful, but this case you mentioned (where pirates steal a ton of money, and the only way to get it back is by spending more money than they lost) is, in my opinion, as much of a dick move as telling your PC, "Your horse ran away when it saw kobolds. You can't find its tracks anywhere whatsoever."
Yeh, one of my players is like that. Well, I should say, he had one night like that - Castle Rvenloft (3.5). Eight characters. Four hours. By the end I'd stopped narrating new character entrances and just started putting his new characters in treasure chests and broom closets.
You mean his new characters were the loot? Sweet!
Yeh, one of my players is like that. Well, I should say, he had one night like that - Castle Rvenloft (3.5). Eight characters. Four hours. By the end I'd stopped narrating new character entrances and just started putting his new characters in treasure chests and broom closets.You mean his new characters were the loot? Sweet!
You know it went like this for the rest of the part
"Another character? Didn't we find one of those in the last chest? When do we get some loot?"
Yeh, one of my players is like that. Well, I should say, he had one night like that - Castle Rvenloft (3.5). Eight characters. Four hours. By the end I'd stopped narrating new character entrances and just started putting his new characters in treasure chests and broom closets.You mean his new characters were the loot? Sweet!You know it went like this for the rest of the part
"Another character? Didn't we find one of those in the last chest? When do we get some loot?"
Or:
"Quick! Let's move on to the next combat so this guy can get killed too and we can take all his stuff!"
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Yeh, one of my players is like that. Well, I should say, he had one night like that - Castle Rvenloft (3.5). Eight characters. Four hours. By the end I'd stopped narrating new character entrances and just started putting his new characters in treasure chests and broom closets.You mean his new characters were the loot? Sweet!You know it went like this for the rest of the part
"Another character? Didn't we find one of those in the last chest? When do we get some loot?"
"Why do we keep finding expendables? What about some permanent items?"
LOL, if it was whole party they could be called "The Expendables."
LOL, if it was whole party they could be called "The Expendables."
Would they then be required to roleplay exclusively in oneliners?
I fake a call from work and leave my two buddies to deal with telling dumb and dumber that their play style doesn't fit with ours. My buddies, of course call me later and yell at me for leaving them with the cat in the bag so to speak. I proceed to tell them that I'm really a saint but I just display chaotic evil behavior to avoid the evil gods coming after me. :)
While their turning up with CE characters to an Exalted game was a d*ck move, so was this - your friends got d*cked by the two new guys and by you, I'm not surprised they yelled.
Looking back, of course it was a d*ck move. My friends still give me crap about it even today. Of course, they've done far worse.I fake a call from work and leave my two buddies to deal with telling dumb and dumber that their play style doesn't fit with ours. My buddies, of course call me later and yell at me for leaving them with the cat in the bag so to speak. I proceed to tell them that I'm really a saint but I just display chaotic evil behavior to avoid the evil gods coming after me. :)While their turning up with CE characters to an Exalted game was a d*ck move, so was this - your friends got d*cked by the two new guys and by you, I'm not surprised they yelled.
With friends like these ... ;)
cough cough, bump
Myself and my freiends produced a very silly d20 game some time back called "Mudgrips & Big Rigs" that lampoons our own lives and experiences growing up and living in backwoods Georgia. I'll have to upload the old files and link to them later tonight. It's actually better played while a little lit up.
I think that would have been my big warning signal there and then. I do not know many people who can game when totally off their faces on beer, moonshine, cocain and marijuana.
I'm from Arkansas, and I'm dying to see this game!
[
I'm from Arkansas, and I'm dying to see this game!
Didn't get a chance to go digging for it the other day - real life gets in the way. I'll try to get it up and post a link sometime this week.
I'm from Arkansas, and I'm dying to see this game!Myself and my freiends produced a very silly d20 game some time back called "Mudgrips & Big Rigs" that lampoons our own lives and experiences growing up and living in backwoods Georgia. I'll have to upload the old files and link to them later tonight. It's actually better played while a little lit up.
I think that would have been my big warning signal there and then. I do not know many people who can game when totally off their faces on beer, moonshine, cocain and marijuana.
I'd invent one called "Bicker & B*tchcraft" for my own life but if I made it to true to life it would be dismissed as outrageous fantasy ...