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Davashuum's betrayal is an interesting story but it loses much of it's punch since it occurs off camera, the PCs don't meet either PC before this happens, and the PCs don't learn of it until much later. Here's my take on improving things:
Just as Jhavhul works for Yemeri's attention, Andrathai and the Templars compete for Nefeshti's attention. Andrathai had all but won this competition but the rivalry still existed.
Due to this rivalry, Andrathai did not inform the rest of the Templars of his plan to defeat Jhavhul -- his defeat was to be Andrathai's crowning achievement. While Andrathai's plan went awry, the rest of the Templars simply believed that Andrathai had destroyed Jhavhul and his army in one cataclysmic magical blast. Nefeshti believed that Andrathai had sacrificed himself to assure her safety.
Nefeshti is despondent and sick from the war, wanting nothing more to do with it. This leads to Vardishal leaving. Kardswann, the scout, was not content to sit and do nothing and eventually succumbs to his wanderlust and leaves. Zaifyd, Pazhvann and Davashuum remain with Nefeshti, each hoping she eventually grows out of her depression and notices them still around.
Over the years, unscrupulous humans, genies and outsiders cruelly tempted Nefeshti with false news about her lost lover in hopes of gaining her favor. Eventually, Nefeshti banned all talk of Andrathai and what had happened.
When Zaifyd learns of the Scroll, he sees this as his chance to gain Nefeshti's favor. He leaves in hopes of finding it, slowly losing his power as his search takes much longer than he planned.
When the scroll eventually turns up in Katapesh, it first comes to the attention of Pazhvann. He goes to the capital and poses as a buyer for the scroll. If turned down or if the PCs learn who he truly is, Pazhvann reveals himself. Pazhvann only wants to know if the scroll is real. If the PCs will agree to tell him everything Rayhan learns, he agrees to tell them about Nefeshti and the Templars (thus getting out some info that hasn't really gotten out at this point). Once he knows if the scroll is real or not, he'll return to Nefeshti and inform her.
Davashuum is no fool though and quickly realizes what Pazhvann is up to. He too journeys to Katapesh but, lacking the scruples of the other Templars, he simply shows up to the PCs and demands the scroll. When that doesn't work, he attacks the PCs to take the scroll by force.
Hopefully the PCs are on good terms with Pazhvann, who shows up to aid the PCs against Davashuum. It is during this fight that Davashuum kills Pazhvann. The genie then turns back to finish off the PCs.
The absence of her last two Templars has been noticed though by Nefeshti. Sensing the death of one of her Templars, she appears over Pazhvann's body. Seeing what has happened, she strips Davashuum of his powers and banishes him from the city. The genie flees before the PCs can do much about it.
Nefeshti's sees the scoll and asks if it really is Andrathai's. She touches it tenderly, a tear rolling down her cheek, before teleporting away.
Davashuum travels the countryside in disgrace until Jhavhul's return. Sensing his opportunity for revenge, he joins forces with the efreet.
Although I plan on introducing him in a slightly different manner, I agree that Pazhvann definitely needs some face time in The Jackal's Price to give his off-screen death dramatic weight later on. If you establish Pazhvann as the "good cop" and Davashuum as the "bad cop" -- and then reveal that the "bad cop" actually murdered the "good cop" for going soft on the PCs...
I made Pazhvann a recurring NPC in my LoF. Because I used those audio files that someone posted in this forum (short tales on beginning and end end of each chapter red by a storyteller), Pazhvann made the ideal choice since he's the only Templar that doesn't get any screen time.
I haven't worked out the details yet, but for now, let's just say that due to chance/wishwarp he was drawn to PCs and senses the greatness in them and serves as a guiding hand. To play out his mysterioussness and spark the PCs intrest to investigate him more, he oftens just disappears from the monastery for a few days (and he also just appeared in their caravan to Kelmarane one morning) and also the PCs are the only who can see him. But they didn't figure that out yet. :D Few times I said that he's riding with Garavel or sitting next to Almah, yet no talking was involved. We'll see how that goes, now they're just intrigued by him.
And yeah, the idea of his death by Davashum occuring in front of the party is fantastic!
The knight that is the moldspeaker is throwing himself whole hog into the Templar subplot (his old order is disgraced and he's blatantly using this as a substitute). So more Templar stuff is fantastic. I may alter this slightly, but something like this could work well.
I recall James Jacobs mentioning that those two were supposed to show up in Jackal's Price, but were edited out (supposedly for the better). I wonder if we can some behind-the-scenes of what the original appearance of those two would be?
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The knight that is the moldspeaker is throwing himself whole hog into the Templar subplot (his old order is disgraced and he's blatantly using this as a substitute). So more Templar stuff is fantastic. I may alter this slightly, but something like this could work well.
I recall James Jacobs mentioning that those two were supposed to show up in Jackal's Price, but were edited out (supposedly for the better). I wonder if we can some behind-the-scenes of what the original appearance of those two would be?
Alas... not really. What was supposed to manifest with the Templars basically got put into the last adventure—there's not a "missing file of material" to show off at all because it was deleted, since it didn't sync up with how the Templars were supposed to function.