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RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE!!!
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As much as I can.Necro much? Wow, I just now realized you thought my quip was directed at you and not myself. Whoops!
Nice. In seriousness, all undead are beautiful in their own way
An ancient thread Necro, but dead links and a lack of photoshop skills have me scouring the internet for a rebuilt map of Drezen for use in books 3-6. Does anyone know of somewhere the referenced maps are still available, or if there are other openly-available maps of the citadel rebuilt/refurbished? Yes, yes...
Nice.
Necro much?
Sigh. More vitalist propaganda. Egregiously misnamed in the fact that their life shall be short (even for a mortal), and their death shall be long indeed. But rejoice! We have at your request employed divinations - and determined the veracity of your many grandiose claims. No surprises in the answers we found. As it turns out, "DeathlessOne" is a third level human commoner with the standard NPC array. Apparently making baseless statements on the internet doesn't earn you much XP, much less any class levels. The more astute among you may have picked up on the contradictions among his mary-stuish claims, and already realized this is no demigod. He'd lose a footrace with a pack of zombies, which is a concern because that is almost certainly in his future. His temporary stint with our operation was as our Social Media Intern, but we fired him soon after for making similiar absurd and depreciating statements on our Twitter. We believe he is still unemployed. But this isn't all bad news! We have finally found a spot in our organization - we're going to give your mind to our Callers in Darkness before feeding your body to our Ghoul constituents. Oh, and yes, "Deathless", please regale us with more impotent stories of your godhood. I'm sure your power has tripled since you totally hung out with your bros Pharasma and Aroden and Rovagug! Very plausible! ... Update: The writer of this PR statement has been fired. They do not reflect the views or opinions of the Thread Necromancers Guild, nor do we take culpability for the statements within. The Thread Necromancers Guild does not condone violence towards anyone, living, unliving, or constructed. We do not discriminate based on ancestry, alignment, heritage, gender identity, mortal status, orientation, political beliefs, pregnancy, and religion as well as other any other identity markers. We believe in advocacy for the equal treatment of the all creatures and all threads. This said, we have put in a legal injunction against the individual who uses the alias "DeathlessOne" immediately cease any and all attempts to communicate with us due to defaming and inaccurate statements as well an immediate cease-and-desist in publicly making discriminatory and hateful speech towards to the unliving individuals (as well as others). Further questions should be directed to our legal team.
Even we think it might have been better to let this one rest. Representation in RPGs is a pretty serious thing, and this issue (we believe) has been resolved appropriately.
I'm not normally into thread necromancy, but I have a few questions... There's nothing wrong with Necromancy, thread or otherwise.
This seems like an appropriate Necro.
Both summoning and creating undead are not evil. Not that there's anything wrong with being evil. Just because you're a bad guy doesn't mean you're a bad guy.
We're just sexy, okay? Don't be so narrow-minded.
You rang?
The "always evil" argument is usually just a flimsy excuse for wanton violence against unliving individuals. It's usually followed up with anecdotal evidence and hyperbolic stories. Are there not mortal serial killers who commit heinous crimes, and armies of mortals who commit horrific war crimes but still totally get their own hobgoblin nation? And yeah, heavenly for doesn't care about mortem status, just alignment. Doesn't make going around blasting selfish peasants okay, so neither should blasting mindless (but technically evil) zombies. PS: The Thread Necromancer's Guild is still recruiting.
It's a good thing I own Ultimate Thread Reanimation for situations like this. We've got plenty in stock, for those who don't own it yet!
Tyrant's Grasp is an uplifting AP with teachable moments and positive themes, but sadly requires the heroes to involve themselves in needless violence against innocent unliving individuals. Sigh. More vitalist propaganda. Dear Egregiously Misnamed One, I'm afraid your contractor status with the Guild have been permanently revoked, but we're pleased to announce we've fast-tracked your application for the new "Undead Squirrel Kibbel" role within our organization. We look forward to speaking with you soon.
Tyrant's Grasp is an uplifting AP with teachable moments and positive themes, but sadly requires the heroes to involve themselves in needless violence against innocent unliving individuals.
Man-oh-man, have we got just the perfect guild for you to join on this here Paizo message-board. ;) You rang?
Just a friendly reminder that all necromancy is appropriate and acceptable.
218) The thread wasn't dead. Like Aroden, it faked its death to claim the insurance. But if either was dead, it'd be completely reasonable to do a respectful necro.
While we had nothing to do with the death, we'd very interesting in getting our hands on the remains...
Detect evil is prejudicial and always inappropriate. It doesn't distinguish between a completely harmless, innocent undead person and a mortal psychopath. No more paladins is the solution.
Just a friendly reminder that we are still recruiting like-minded individuals to join our prestigious organization.
...I am going to disagree slightly with ShroudedInLight, in that if the GM and the player handle it well I'm not sure you need to coordinate with the rest of the players... Yes, this is a very serious issue but one with a clear solution. Kill everyone. Party, NPCs, players, GM. Everyone. Raise them as undead. Problem solved.
We're aware that this is a serious issue, but we are obliged to give our standard advice: Kill the problem player's character, raise them as undead. Regardless of whether this solves the issue, kill the player, raise them as undead.
We should probably create a statblock or two for Guild Agents. Thoughts? TBQH you've done all the heavy lifting already. But yeah, it's an impressive number of HD of undead controlled. Also, the statblock alone would be monstrously unwieldy. Not a criticism, but probably not the project we're looking for.
We should probably create a statblock or two for Guild Agents. Thoughts?
As much as desperately wish to derail this thread with a gruesome depiction of our... renegotiation of terms with impudent paladins, it would be a unkind to the OP. Now, if someone was to create their own thread...
Four years is plenty of rest! Time to get up and participate in normal necropolitan society.
Not cool man, that's our thing. Find your own thing. That's just hurtful. :(
Kill the mount, raise it as undead. Whether or not this works, kill the players, raise them as undead.
We're not sure that even we can approve this Necro...
Double Necro? It's so vivid!
Putting together a crossbowman: 1) Make sure you find all the chunks (this is important!)
"The Swarm shall consume you ALL... for NONE shall stand against the Might of the Swarm! You cannot run, you cannot hide... You too will inevitably be devoured and raised into the Perfection that is Undeath!" We're really glad you found this thread. We were considering messaging you.
Oh, I love that. Sadly, I cannot edit the post and I'm not sure I have the doc anymore. The swarm is pretty tough, but it's CR16. A swarmbane clasp is 3k - but it's the sort of monster you'll have a rough time against without preparation. In terms of the effective immortality, I thought that was a nice touch.
Kill the offending character, raise them as undead. Regardless of whether that works, kill the player and raise them as undead.
I am going to shamelessly bump this one again :P Never feel ashamed of Necromancy.
Kill the character, raise them as undead. Regardless of whether this works, kill the player, raise them as undead. What was the question?
You called? Oh. Darnit, another false alarm.
Delicious necro! We approve. You're not on the FtP Discord, are you? A few of our agents are active there.
I don't pay no union undues either! "Kobolds, man." *Freezeframe, sitcom music plays*
I don't pay no union dues. There's no dues required! We're a network of like-minded individuals who support unliving rights and the normalization of necromancy.
We cannot support the creation of weapons focused to harm the unliving, and will retaliate in kind...
This thread's OP was so fantastic, I'm necromancing it... And what a delicious necro it is! Though six years is a lot of black onyx to spend...
This isn't old enough to call a necro, so instead we'll just add our two copper pieces: Ghouls.
This makes me so very happy. I appreciate the work that went into this. We're actually really happy with it, though it's almost certainly under CR and liable to cause your players to flip the table.
Obviously, this is just a prototype but here's our work so far. We're quite proud of our handicraft, but constructive criticism is encouraged. Trolling will be met untimely devouring by said swarm, obviously. To be clear, we see this creature as our progeny and a member of our family, not an object or tool to be used and controlled. Undead Sentient Squirrel Swarm: Undead Sentient Squirrel Swarm (CR16)
Aura chittering madness (100 ft., DC29) Senses blindsight 30 ft., deathwatch, detect magic, darkvision 60 ft., lowlight vision; Perception +31 Defense
Offense
Spell-Like Abilities (CL 18th; concentration +25)
Statistics
Feats Ability Focus (chittering madness, devour flesh, distraction), Combat Casting, Dodge, Following Step, Greater Spell Focus (necromancy), Improved Initiative, Mobility, Quicken Spell-Like Ability (fear), Spell Focus (necromancy), Step Up Skills Acrobatics +31, Climb +34, Intimidate +30, Perception +31, Sense Motive +23, Stealth +42
Languages Aklo, Common, Necril SQ desecrated, gnawing swarm, unholy proliferation Special Abilities
Due to the nature of the secret rituals required to create an undead sentient squirrel swarm, it must be created in the area of an a desecrate spell with an evil altar or profane permanent fixture, granting it +2 hp per hd. The additional hitpoints are not lost in an area of an antimagic field and cannot be dispelled. The undead sentient squirrel swarm quickly strips the flesh off living creatures, ingesting it to sate their endless hunger. Any time the swarm deals swarm damage to a creature with flesh (GM discretion) that is helpless, nauseated, or prone it also deals 1d4 points of STR, DEX, and CON drain, as well as gaining the benefits of haste (per the haste spell) for 1 round (this negates any slow or stagger effect on the swarm). A successful DC29 Reflex Save reduces this to 1 point of STR, DEX, and CON damage and negates the haste effect. Any corpse that remains in the swarms square for 1 round is stripped to the bone, suitable for the creation of a skeleton and cannot returned to life by raise dead. As a full round action that provokes attacks of opportunity, the swarm may devour every remaining scrap of any corpses in its area, effectively disintegrating them with no domains but powered bone dust. an undead sentient squirrel swarm's swarm attack counts as magic and adamantine for the purposes of DR. Additionally, it ignores hardness of less than 20 and deals double damage to objects. It may burrow through any material that has a harness less than 20 (GM discretion). An undead sentient squirrel swarm is immune to any spell or spell-like ability that allows spell resistance. In addition, certain spells and effects function differently against the creature, as noted below:
An undead sentient squirrel swarm is immune to positive energy, and any time it is affected by positive energy it must make a DC 20 Fort Save or be staggered for 1d4 rounds. On a success, the duration is 1 round. An undead sentient squirrel swarm is not destroyed when if dispersed. Every single member of the swarm is capable of reforming the swarm via profane multiplication. Unless a swarm is dispersed by an area of effect ability or track down and destroy every last remaining member of the swarm, it reforms in 1d4 days at the location of the largest number of survivors (even if that is just one) with 1 hit point and begins to fast heal as normal. Necromancers usually keep several survivors locked away for this very purpose, rendering the swarm effectively immortal.
I am already undead?I'm not immune to lobster creatures but I am immune to GM rulings.You are not immune to the Might of the Swarm, come, face your DOOM, you are NOTHING before the Perfection of Undeath! Don't worry, they're cool. One of the founding members of the TNG.
That last piece is a misconception, though further discussion would be in poor taste and against site rules.As long as you're not "one of those disgusting biophiliacs"... While we're broadly a fan of Rich Burlew and his work, we cannot support discrimination against the living, the dead, or those who pursue romance beyond the boundaries of mortality.
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