Ok, how does a thread like this get started without the go-ahead from his prime cultist? That's just not respecting right there.
(BTW: This thread now OFFICIALLY approved by the cult of Sebastian)
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"I find your lack of faith disturbing..." Then obviously you don't know me very well. I have always made a distinction between faith and church. I spurn organized church, but that makes me no less devout to the whims and praises of the High Lord himself, the king of ponies, Sebastian! And yes, the irony of someone who despises organized church founding a cult is not lost one me.
I missed that! Hilarious.Children, parents, teachers, lawyers... everybody loves ponies! You know, I should be upset that someone is now claiming to be the high priest of the cult of Sebastian when I was the original founder, but as lazy as I am, you can have the gorram paperwork, and I am in no position to care enough to try to wrest control back.
Jack does not look like a shiny happy pony. *insert vile snear*You know you want to join the Cult of Jack. We have beer and chicks. I was referring, aloofly mind you, to his previous form. prior to becoming closer to the Great Pony. And I would ask that you show proper respect for the Holy Creatures of the Great Pony.
You know you want to join the Cult of Jack. We have beer and chicks. HA! you know as well as I do that the Cult of Jack is just a front for the Cult of Sebastian. just look at them. Jack and Sebastian look similar. coincidence? The high Lord Sebastian would like you to think so! *insert Sinister Laugh*
Thou shalt not worship false idols! There is only one true Sebastian! Heresy to all you clones! Heresy, I say!How about convincing Sebastian's cultists to join the Cult of Jack?....and confuse the hell out of people all over the board.Oh come on, give us something hard to do. Or...well, we have been scraping the bottom of the barrel for recruitments...if they want to parade as The High Honorable Lord himself, we can take that as a sign they're to be Cultists. and they more they argue that they're not cultists, they're Sebastian himself, the more they are affirming their cultist status. isn't it the goal of most religions to be like the leader? therefore, we can claim them on our taxes! yay!
do we have more Sebastian's or Gninja's do you think? There is only one true Lord of the Ponies! therefore there are more Gninja's, but even added together they don't equal the righteousness of the One Sebastian!
Wow, I can feel my I.Q. dropping just from reading what you people post. Then there's no way you can be the real thing, since the Lord High Sebastian, ender of worlds and stupidity, is the epitome of intelligence (and logic) and it can not decrease. even the brain suckers from Zaplon V died of over eating and still the Great Sebastian's intellect remained unfazed!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw... and I thought WE were cute...I requested the return of the avatar - it seemed like the only option given the sheer volume of wannabes.And its soooooocute! Squeal No...you are slippers!
Yay for thread ressurection! We can now continue the praise of Sebastian and the recruiting of new cultists. in fact, we need a roll call! Cultists Assemble!
um maybe not... I will just take them off the bodies of the dead after the koolaid orgy of doom. whoa now...I dunno what parties you've been to, but there's no reason to fault a guy who likes the tast of suger-enhanced Cherry...
um....who's Sebastian? He's the reason to become a Cultist of Sebastian! He is the Great High Lord Sebastian, who's honour and glory are known far and wide. He is the first disciple of the Great Pony! He is the Killer of Kittens! He is the Destroyer of Poodles and WarWoofs! Now bow mortal, for in his radiance we are humbled!!!
Ok I will order 3 pair then. One gold one purple and one green. Very well, but they are for Cultists of Sebastian only, therefore I will need you to sign our ledger of members, nono, in blood, get fitted for your uniform and then proceed to the cook where he'll ask you for your Kool-Aid flavor preferance to go with the butter on toast we're having later.
Do they stretch? are they warm and fuzzy? Is it more like a house slipper or a fine dark leather for your nice clothing shoes? do they smell? leave strange fungus on your toes?oops sorry shere the poodles not skin em... I dont think poodle leather would be that soft.And I think you'd be surprised. why, all of us Cultists of Sebastian have Poodle Leather Moccasins. yes, yes, slipper, not if they're cleaned and disinfected and blowtorched before you wear them, see previous answer.
oops sorry shere the poodles not skin em... I dont think poodle leather would be that soft. And I think you'd be surprised. why, all of us Cultists of Sebastian have Poodle Leather Moccasins.
And now the Great and Mighty High Lord Sebastian has gone to the next step on his way to joining the Great Pony above! He has adopted it's form and risen above us in his Glory! All hail the Great Sebastian! All bow down to his Worthiness and Honerableness and ... uh ... Awesomeness!!! *Bows and begins chanting*
You could try being a Cultist. It's a lot of fun, and all the free Kool-Aid you can drink. It's also one of my favorite images from Pathfinder so far.
You post using your differant Aliases in the hope noone connects them and realizes you're just increasing your threadcount. But that would be a shameful thing to do. absolutely shameful. and the lord Sebastian frowns on shameful things.
Odds were stacked in Sebastian's favor......I think with the rate of exchange you get a days worth of butter.VICTORY!!! YAY! butter to go on the toast that will be served with Kool-Aid in the after fight victory party!
VICTORY!!! YAY! Praise be to the great and honerable Lord Sebastian. So great he doesn't even need to fight to win! Victory! WOOO! Now on to the chanting and bowing portion of the evening. I also don't lose my pony! yay! don't know what i'd do without sunbeam...but now what? what was the odds? how many more ponies did I win?
The great and wise Lord Sebastian couldn't lose to a mere puppy upstart. unthinkable! I wager my pony. every cultist get's a pony.
NOOOOOO!!! The Ponies! must go protect the ponies! *Climbs onto sunwing, his blue and yellow mount, and rushes to the stables*
Dammit man! Pull yourself together! You're a Cultist of Sebastian, man!but at least I got her number!Did you two sniff bums? gah! you're right. Praise be to Sebastian the wise! Sebastian the Just! Sebastian the apparently large Ego-ed.
What are you talking about? there's a bunch of us left. well...maybe only us two. but that's till twice as many as I thought there was.
Hmm...yes, gather in one place so that I may serve you up as one to my lord and master! in fact, why don't you all just please come roll around in these conveniant spices and herbs and jump into that pot- i mean hot tub over there. That's a good group of puppies, saving me time and effort. yes you are! yes you are! Yesssss.... *taps fingers together innocently*
We concur. too long has it been a thorn in the side of the great and honerable!I allers wanned to be a false idle. We speak for the one and great. not you false ... ursurper ... wait...i think i have something there wrong. at any rate, the lord Sebastian decrees it! down with those annoying excuse for slippers!
Six new llamas! Nooo! You musn't give in to the outcries! Incidently, that red bird/owl thing looks pretty cool. KakrabanHorror_final.jpg is what i'm referring to.
We concur. too long has it been a thorn in the side of the great and honerable!
yesss....let them all gather here so that we may sterilize the world of all the llama lovers at one! then the world will be free of them and open to accepting the greatness of the anti-llama! the pony! the Bella Sera pony! (as a side note, why are there no bella sera avatars? or are there and i just couldn't find one?)
All praise the Magnificent and Just Sebastian, who's justice is only riveled by his magnificence! Revel in the beauty of Bella Sera! Join me in the poodle hunt! Bella Sara ponies make glorious and perfect glue. Oh, and doggy kibble. See? Bella Sera is so perfect that even when they live out their long and happy lives, prancing and free in our imaginations, and the inevitable happens, they're still perfect! Now bow and give praise!
Spoiler: *bows down and begins chanting*
HOMME SOMME NOMME DAE!
HOMME SOMME NOMME DAE! We call you oh leader of the soapbox and vanquisher of poodles!
HOMME SOMME NOMME DAE!
There can only be one! Imposter I say, trying to suck up Lord Sebastian's magnificence like a lamprey by using a similar name!...in other words, I vote (d) Spoiler: (Also, this post is entirely in jest, and I bear the subject party no ill will. It is possible he meant to make "Sebastian", but it was already taken and so reverted to a nickname.)
Even though it was later bought out by a larger national company, the recipes for the boxed meals are still the same. "hatred with the intensity of Sebastian’s love for ponies (if you resist)!" that could be Sebastian's campaign slogan! It's not catchy, but I wouldn't want to be you if you resist.
Vote Sebastian! He is your lord and master is deserves to have the position! Plus, a platform of Bella Sera in every home is better then a platform of more religion and less science in schools and an increase in taxes to pay for more gas for further destruction of the environment instead of an increase in R&D for more eco-friendly ways to travel...I'm just sayin.
*gutplugs goofy cultie with a .38 revolver* Well, it's a good thing this is one of them there cults that grants healing powers...or at least promises them...kinda hope it works... cough...cough*heals mysteriously* There. all better. and seriously, who brings a gun to knife fight? totally unfair man. not cool.
Aha! *Pounces on Heath and brandishes the knife*I'll be needing those Fingers to please the great and powerful Sebastian!
AHA! I'm from Quebec, your constitution means nothing to me! I can praise him as much as I want! ...Incidently, isn't freedom of speech in the constituion, along with freedom of religion, so long as we do not try to force anyone into it? Coerce is alright if I remember, but not force.
I thought cults were supposed to give thier worldly goods to their leader. So everybody needs to send Sebastian their Bella Sera cards to be a full member. *Pauses from hunting to consider this* hmmm...good point. you know, you'd make a fine Cultist of Sebastian with attitude like that. Care to join me in the hunt?*Resumes hunt while making deranged whooping noises a la Zoidberg*
*pulls out knife and begins to hunt said aforementioned flea-ridden poster*
Cake or death!? Assuming that cake is being sold as part of a Cult of Sebastian fundraiser, then yes.
um well you have to be offering more then the other cults.......... Hmm...well we won't try to slip you some questionable Kool-Aid or try to convince you that sleeping with our leader is the only way to attain salvation. You also don't have to join a commune or partake in giant ceramonies that may or may not involve mass suicide when a comet happens around. No sir. we are all about the quiet worship here at the cult of Sebastian. worship where you are, whenever it's convenient. In fact, the only real rule is that you have to wear the really cool robes. ...I will look into this online Bella Sera deal...it may be of use to us. yesss....
Unfortunately Lord Sebatian of kittens, the great and honerable, has not graced us with a budged for such things (heck, we can't even really offer the sammiches)...but don't you want to be part of something? of a group the listens and shares and happens to be exactly the same as you and therefore understands all your problems? a group that can give you a figurehead to trust and believe in? Everybody wants that. No lieing now.
My alarm clock with relaxing noises on it has a cricket selection. It's supposed to put you to sleep. >.<! Ok...new plan. Finger Sammiches! to all new cultists!
Yes! A cricket cult! they will harass the unbelievers, the heathens if you will, with their incessant chirping, driving them into madness through lack of peace, quiet and sleep!
This is pretty f@@~ed up. No, this is merely the next logical step in spreading the awesomeness that is Sebastian. Now all we need to do is recruit more cultists.
Haven't you ever heard of heathens? Since Heathen means disbeliever (in the modern sense at any rate, or at least in its most common usage), isn't it counter-intuitive to have a cult of heathens? *Prods Heathansson with a stick*Huh? Huh? Whereas a Cult of Sebastian is the perfect logic! Accept it and let the awesomeness flow through you! *Begins gregarian chanting*
*Force feeds Ed Kool-Aid* Bow before the Lord of Kittens or...oh. too late. |