Denbora Azzar's page

God’s damned right.

The stupid one's not wrong. Tonya did it, Thursty did it, Jenny did it. It's kind of a right of passage around here.

If you all are "lucky", there might be THUNDERLIPS! cosplay this year. He claims to be "slimming down". I'll believe it when I s--

No, I don't think I will be needing proof of that. I'll just take him at his word.

Let’s not be hasty, now.

"I swear a horse kicked that boy in the head as a child. Repeatedly."

So this year is totes different; I’m not runnng a single table and I am not grinding out PFS sessions. I’m only playing two PFS sessions, both 7-11, Friday night and Saturday morning (Round Mtn, and Sevenfigers, respectively). Yes gods, THUNDERLIPS! in Round Mountain.

”Motherf+~@er, maybe the table will need a cleric. You ever think about that, motherf~~#er? No. No, you do not.”

Take a look at Denbora’s character page.

I’m a cleric with Craft: Clockwork that has a clockwork spy. There are a few items in the old skool seeker of secrets book that at last check were legal for play.

I don’t know what you are talking about, Brown. I am powerful enough that we can walk through those 10-11s without a scratch, and you know it.

Need to be 10th my ...

...seeks to become the master.

Wait. That motherf#%~er volunteered us for what?

"I ain't doin' s%*~ for Taldor."

"I guess I did do some shit for Taldor."

Denbora hitches his britches and adjusts his belt a bit.

"I ain't doin' shit for Taldor."

If his beard was the only thing that kept his ancestors from crying and disowning this pathetic excuse...

"Da f!!$ crawled up her armor and died?"

Xallis and Navia wrote:

What a bothersome term. Rest assured that the only 'chains' around me are the ones made of gold and adorned with fine jewels.

Weren't you the summoner that was ouclassed by our Cleric that wasn't even appropriately strong to come on the adventure in the first place?

I remember needing a wizard, and you couldn't even figure out what to summon to help us.

"Yeah, he was. Lot of good his fancy finery did him on that adventure. Motherf@+@ing arcane caster with no arcane knowledge having motherf!&%er."

"Lucius, you need to cough last month's fee. Those burning sensations don't cure themselves, you know."

Tineke Bolleman wrote:

Thank you. Ninja/palladin is suprisingly effective and is really fun to roleplay with my shady past.

My Ninja/Paladin (of Irori nonetheless) keeps searching for enlightenment (and is entirely unsuccessful at it).

"Because that worthless excuse for a paladin is a moron. Straight up moron. She is damn lucky her ass is attached to head otherwise she is liable to confuse one orifice for another."

"Hey, Kline. You got a contact down on the docks? Maybe know a boat gonna sail for... oh, I don't know, The Shackles or some such hell hole that might make a pit stop on a certain island? I got something I wanna put on as cargo."

Denbora puts his left foot on the dead assassin's chest, lines up his warhammer next to the assassin's temple, clears his throat and expels the wad of phlegm on the dead assassin's face. He shakes a bit, back and forth, adjusting his grip on his warhammer before bringing the hammer head at great strength back to the assassin's temple.

With a smile and nod of his head, Denbora walks over to retrieve the now free rolling assassin head. Picking it up, Denbora walks over to Kline.

"This."

"Who's this new motherf@&+er?", pointing at the robed person?

Denbora shrugs his shoulders and twitches his head back and forth a bit as if to say "whatever".

We got the name of the person who was hired to kill you. Uh, Vashian the Needle or some shit like that. We got that from a real pain in the ass known as a medusa, right before we sent her and her sister back to what ever pit they crawled out. There were a few more of these Red Mantis peeps that we killed, and then I can only assume we killed this Needle dick guy. Here's his stuff."

let's boogie back to grandmaster flash and the furious orcs

I planned to pop off a few channels

Denbora calls upon the power of the Daddy Mack to heal all of his beetches, selecting out those who would profane his holiness.

Channel to heal mofos!: 5d6 ⇒ (1, 6, 2, 4, 1) = 14
Channel to heal mofos!: 5d6 ⇒ (5, 6, 3, 4, 2) = 20

yes, just like oils of fly :)

BoF extra movement

Denbora races towards the action.

"Whup his ass Torag!"

Attack!: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (13) + 12 = 25 damage!: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6

TORAG! Whupthis motherf!@~er's ass!

Denbora points his warhammer at the flying mantis. A white light gathers at the end of the weapon, gathering into the shape of a warhammer, before firing at the Manits.

Spiritual Warhammer

Attack!: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (13) + 12 = 25Damage!: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10

Denbora channels to heal.

Healing!: 5d6 ⇒ (1, 5, 4, 6, 3) = 19

BoF: +2 to attack, AC and Ref Saves

Denbora stands up voicing a string of profanity that would make Lamashtu blush.

The pissed off gnome casts Sanctuary. DC 16 Will save. Fail means it can not attack me for the duration of the spell unless I attack it first.

BoF: +2 to attack, AC and Ref Saves

Double move
BoF SPEED!

for record keeping, Looking at 1450 for the raise companion and 2000 for the diamonds for restorations assuming Denbora is willing to do so the next day.

of course

double move

Denbora Azzar
727-9
SoCo
Craft: Clockwork Day Job!: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (1) + 16 = 17

Denbora moves 20' into the room. Based on whether the invis purge reveals will determine his standard action.

BoF unchanged

Denbora casts Invisibility Purge and then moves towards the vocalizations.

+2 to attack, AC and reflex saves

Denbora casts Shield of Faith.

Denbora chooses the extra 30' of movement.

"Gunari, Hold up!"

"Da f@&&? Enough of this shit."

Denbora raises his warhammer high and shouts "Let's go motherf&%$ers!"

Denbora casts Blessing of Fervor which I believe gets everyone according to my admittedly small understanding of simple math

Blessing of Fervor:
Increase its speed by 30 feet.
Stand up as a swift action without provoking an attack of opportunity.
Make one extra attack as part of a full attack action, using its highest base attack bonus.
Gain a +2 bonus on attack rolls and a +2 dodge bonus to AC and Reflex saves.
Cast a single spell of 2nd level or lower as if it were an enlarged, extended, silent, or still spell.

Denbora chooses to increase his attacks, AC, and Reflex saves by 2 this round.

"Let's boogie."

Denbora can cast Light

Denbora looks over his comrades before putting his chisel away.

"Make up your f#~+ing minds buncha slack jawed mouthbreathers never get to have any fun on these missions "No Denbora, we can't do that! That would be wrong!" f#@&ing motherf%&$ers"

Once the group starts talking about going back to town for a scroll, Denbora turns his traveler's any tool in to a chisel. Shouldering his shield, he walks over to Gunari and makes to start chiseling him into smaller more manageable pieces.

Seeing the looks of horror come over his fellow Pathfinders' faces, he pauses before starting his work.

"What? I was gonna cast mending on him before we turned back to human. Sheesh. Buncha ignorant motherf*+%ers..."

Besides, like this he is one heavy ass motherf++~er. I don't wanna carry him back to town like this. Don't gimme that look, Kain. You better start choking that chicken of yours more if you think he's gonna be able to carry Gunari. So unless one of you chapped asses has a better idea?"

"Nope. That motherf~%!er is beyond my help. Have you tried pouring a beer on him?"

Knowledge arcana to determine if there is anything we can use from the dead medusae to reverse Gunari's case of the munchies?

Snakes. Why'd there have to be snakes? Medusas, very dangerous; you go first. There are motherf%+!ing snakes in this motherf$$$ing room.

Denbora calls upon his gear gnome heritage and casts Prestidigitation. Small clockwork gears form from thin air. They click and whirl about, piecing themselves together. The spell complete, Denbora holds a large mundane looking mirror in his hand.

"Aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhh!" as he runs forward toward the medusas.

Denbora moves forward to free the prisoners. "You got a f$&#ing key? Would be a lot easier if you just gave me the f+*~ing key."

Denbora would like to use perception to determine if the Red Mantis has any weapons hidden. Perception!: 1d20 + 21 ⇒ (9) + 21 = 30

Denbora walks forward with Gunari. "Let's get this shit over with..." he grumbles to himself.

"By the Hammer of Torag, heal these motherf$&&ers!"

channel to heal
Healing!: 5d6 ⇒ (5, 4, 2, 6, 2) = 19

Denbora grips his warhammer a little tighter and mumbles a few words.

Channel to heal Healing!: 5d6 ⇒ (4, 6, 2, 6, 3) = 21

Denbora attempts to break the grapple.

CMB!: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (18) + 8 = 26

Denbora turns back to the door muttering "f@** this music shit f&!~ing shit ass f+&$ing bards etc"
He then punches the faces in this order:

Cage face
the face with no mouth
the fancy looking motherf!&+er above the cage face
hear no evil motherf$%!er
cyclops

He then blows in the recorder

"Motherf*+%er go back to yer own gods damned plane!"

dismissal
casting defensively defensive casting!: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (17) + 15 = 32
DC 19 will save

music notes:
C A G E F A F
E F A E E F A F
E F E B F A C E
E E A F F A F E
A F E F A C E

"Motherf!*+er, like you didn't want to blow it either. Shit. Let's find our way in this motherf~!!er and get the f*&*ing job done."

Denbora is absolutely certain he has seen music cast spells before.

Denbora will push air through the recorder.

Where is a fancy-pants light in his loafers bird bard when you need one?

Denbora walks up and inspects the thing on the wall. He gives it the once over.

Perception Take 10, DC 31.

He will also try to dredge up any knowledge he may have on this thing.

Kn: Engineering Take 10, DC 20.
Kn: Arcana Take 10, DC 27.