GM Batpony PFS We be Goblins too (Inactive)

Game Master Batpony

Play by Post campaign for We be Goblins. Feel free to dot.

You are the heroes of the Licktoad Tribe, living legends after you triumphed against the terrible goblin cannibal Vorka and recovered many fireworks from her lair. Your tribe used the fireworks to great effect, but one day while you were out scrounging for more fireworks, adventurers came into the swamp and wiped out your tribe. You returned to your home to find it in ruins.

The scenario assumes you all know each other and have just came back from an adventure. For everyone's benefit, please introduce your character and tell us something quirky about him/her! Once we're done with the introductions, i'll move on to the main quest!

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Chuffy Lickwound | Male Goblin Rogue 3

Character intro - Chuffy is a disgusting looking goblin who fancies himself quite the ladies man. He has a disturbing habit of licking the pustules on his face that his tongue can reach, hence the name Lickwound. Sadistic but with a base cunning, he exhibits unusual intelligence and wisdom (for a goblin anyway).

Chuffy walks around the smoking ruins of what used to be the Licktoad tribe. Welp, canta sayin missa m surpris da dis happen. Da humans weesa come sooner or later, especial after da fireworks. Oh wellz.

Chuffy licks his lips (and a boil right above his lip) as he looks around for any sign of life and more importantly, any items worth scavenging. Perception: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (4) + 7 = 11

Just figured out the whole alias thing. Sorry GM, will post under Chuffy moving forward. You need me to repost my previous post with Chuffy as well?

Things go boom when Mogmurch throws,
Much more fun than using bows.
Sometimes where the boom boom blows
Is not my fault—that’s how it goes.

Reta starts looking around for clues as to what has happened and telling everywhere else. IM LOOKING OVER HERE! LOOK ELSEWHERE AND BE QUIET LIKE ME! trying to be quiet but shouting instead Perception: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (8) + 10 = 18

Be quiet? No be quiet. Find the froggies. Fireworks work too... Maybe we find someone to tell us about bad guys.

Perception: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 2 = 11

"Oooh... Looky what me found!!

You are the bad guys! :D Anyway for those of you who didn't know, Rise of the Runelords happened and the good guys were here while you were out adventuring!

You find nothing of value in your village, and probably thought them Goblins to be weak anyway. Losers.

Now homeless, you have decided to travel to the only other tribe you know, the Birdcrunchers! Maybe they'll let you in on their gang. Only, now that you've arrived in their Territory, something send off. They appear unusually nervous and frighten. They're not even Hostile towards you! A wrinkled old goblin with bulging eyes seeks out to you. She's obviously some sort of Shaman, maybe even the chieftain. If anyone knows whether you can join the tribe, it's likely her!

"Well, well, Licktoads! From the rumours, homeless. I guess you'd be looking for a new home, well, lucky for you, cause we need new blood. Our chieftains lately, have been...lacking. We've been having problems lately with an ogre and his fire breathing ogres, so... any goblin capable of killing them or whatever will not only be welcomed but be made chieftains, one and all!"

The gathered goblins animate in cheer and song but was abruptly silenced by the old goblin.

" But we can't just and you're the stuff of chieftains, you might just be lucky. No, no, before we accept you as our saviours and before you face Pa Munchmeat and his pigs, we shall... Have a Chieftain Moot!

The moot shall start the day after your arrival, feel free to interact in any way you like

Reta says to the rest of the group but unknowingly shouts. I WILL BE THE CHIEFTAN WHEN WE FINISH THE MISSION .

Reta will ask the Shaman more about Pa Munchmeat and his pigs. TELL US ABOUT THE ENEMY AND EVERYTHING YOU KNOW

You may roll this skill untrained

Poog scoffs at Reta " You be chieftain, ha. I be chieftain with my god. you're god be puny god. All gods be puny god if not Zarongel. You birdcrunchers need worship true god. God of fire, and killing dogs. Were the dogs to kill?" Poog continues mumbling as other probably start to ignore him.

RETA KNOWS LOTS Knowledge(Local): 1d10 ⇒ 8

She replies harshly"I shall tell you more, but only after you've proven yourselves at the moot!"

Also almost instinctively, you've notice that at the words "moot", the other goblins celebrate and rush off.

Reta, it's a d20 for skill check, if you have pass the 10 DC you may view the spoiler.

Mogmurch begins making plans to sneak some bombs into the some of the grub. Heh heh. "Yes, Moot! And then explosions! Mogmurch will prove his bestness! All Birdcrunchers will agree or be blown to bits! Tasty, tasty bits."

Reta sits down bored now, waiting for moot to start and starts playing with one of the small pets she has in her pockets. Prodding it every so often

Chuffy licks a scab on his nose as he ponders this new turn of events Orge and firebreathing orges? Pa Munchmeat and pigs? Oh wellz, weesa worry about it after chieftain moot.

Knowledge local: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (14) + 7 = 21

Chuffy ambles over to Reta and takes out his pet Spider "Oi Reta, yousa want pet fight?"

The day goes by uneventful, save a few stomach holes, and dead little animals. Yep, just a typical Goblin day. The birdcrunchers in general stay in their houses not coming out.

The next day....

So begins the Moot, you are cheered by all the goblins, old, young, tall, short, ugly, uglier, fat, not so fat. The old lady goblin who you now know as Wise Mummy Sprattleharsh, depicts the Moot as trials and 3 most enduring, most horrible, most unworthy, dares, and the victor shall be bestowed the legendary, most amazing, most wonderful crown that any eyes has ever seen.

Everyone travels with you, as you encroach the southern caves to take up the first challenege. Each of you are given a bow, and 3 arrows of different colour.

During the challenge, you shall attempt to shoot down a 3 flocks of seagulls, captured by the goblins last night, each flock released further than the previous released. But you shall do this, blindfolded!

So it begins!

You shall each make 3 attempts to shoot them birds . For each roll: roll a perception check, an attack roll, and a d20, applying any modifiers to bow attacks as necessary (BAB and dex mod)

Chuffy steps forward and full of bluster, turns to his companions while being blindfolded by the Birdcruncher goblins "Watchin and see howa its done. Meesa gonna be chieftain!"

Right before he shoots however, Chuffy quietly rubs his lucky toad "Fat Frog" for luck. DM, any luck bonus? =P

Blindfolded, he attempts to hit the seagulls!
1st gull!
perception: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (2) + 7 = 9
attack: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (17) + 6 = 23
generic: 1d20 ⇒ 9

2nd gull!
perception: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (2) + 7 = 9
attack: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9
generic: 1d20 ⇒ 8

3rd gull!
perception: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (1) + 7 = 8
attack: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (14) + 6 = 20
generic: 1d20 ⇒ 7

Chuffy nervously takes off the blindfold to see the results of his shooting...

I'm afraid Desna does not bestow her blessing upon you. :P

A fat goblin in bling, rowdies the crowd as Chuffy steps up to the plate."Starting first, we have, the ugly, the stabby, Chuuuuuuffffffyyyyyyyy." The crowd cheers him on as he takes his first shot.

He carefully calculates the distance and takes the shot! It hits a bird, the crowd goes wild! Wise Mummy puts two sticks in the air denoting 2 points. Full of his new confidence, he takes up the next shot and does exactly the same thing. The arrow shot was weak, and misses everything. Maybe 50 feet short. Jeers are heard. "Boo, what a nobody! He doesn't even know how to hold a bow!"But un-phased, he takes up the final shot. In fact, he tries so hard that his shot flies way way way wide, no one knows where it went. Another big fat 0 from Wise Mummy. The score is Chuffy:2.

On the way to the caves, Mogmurch whips up a mutagen that should make him more nimble. Hopefully.

Mogmurch holds up a hand when given his blindfold. "I already got an eyepatch, see?" He points to the eyepatch with a hole in it that he's wearing. "Mogmurch is the bestest shot, you'll all see!" He licks his lucky toad Ambifier, gulps down his concoction, and takes his shot.

Swift Alchemy to brew a Dex mutagen
Perception: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6
Shot 1: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (10) + 9 = 19
1d20 ⇒ 2

Perception: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10
Shot 2: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (17) + 9 = 26
1d20 ⇒ 15

Perception: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 3 = 7
Shot 3: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (11) + 9 = 20
1d20 ⇒ 8

Reta scoffs at the other goblins. Only she is good at archery and with that she will be the new chieftain. RETA WILL BE THE WINNER!! ALL OTHER GOBS ARE NOT AS GOOD saying normally but accidentally shouting.

Using all the archery training she has. She takes her shots.

perception: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (17) + 11 = 28
attack 1: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (17) + 6 = 23
1d20 ⇒ 5

perception: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (11) + 11 = 22
attack 2: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (19) + 6 = 25
1d20 ⇒ 6

perception: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (3) + 11 = 14
attack 2: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (5) + 6 = 11
1d20 ⇒ 11

The fat goblin speaks! Surely the next contestants will do better than one bird! The Mog, the Murch, the Mogmurch! The crowd cheers again in high hopes. Similarly, in a hurry, Reta also steps up to the plate to prove her worth.

Both contestants fire their flurry of arrows, resulting in 3 birds shot. The crowd seems unimpressed! "Hey, we thought des goblins be the greatest, they look like a bunch of wimps!"Two arrows flew dangerously close though to the crowd, resulting in a few shrieks and gasp. The judges check the dead birds to identify which color shot them down. 2 points to Mogmurch and 4 points to Reta! The crowd goes not so wild, but they speak that maybe she is the chosen one.

Of course not, Desna has a grudge against Lamashtu; mother of all monstrous creatures, goblins included. Alas, Chuffy only pays lip service to the 4 Goblin-Hero-Gods and Lamashtu, and thus is reaping the consequences of his actions :(

Poor steps forward with his bow, holding it backwards as if he's never fired one before. "Praise be to Zarongel, I show all how it's done!"

Using no training at all, he fires off his arrows.

Perception: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 2 = 9
1d20 ⇒ 8
Attack 1: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8

Perception: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (11) + 2 = 13
1d20 ⇒ 5
Attack 2: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (11) + 4 = 15

Perception: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (10) + 2 = 12
1d20 ⇒ 20
attack 3: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (7) + 4 = 11

The crowd mumbles at the next contestant, A cleric! Surely not strong, whatever. But still somehow the fat man manages to rile the crowd up! As Poog takes his first two shots, the crowd boos at his obvious untrained unskillful untalented shots. Surely the last shot does not impress. As he fires his bow, somehow, magically a gust of wind happens, the gust carries the arrow away from the flock of seagulls, but what is this? It stabs an griffin in the eye! Causing it to pludge immediately to it's death. The crowd goes into a frenzy!
Wise Mummy is so impressed, she awards 10 points to Poog!

The crowd gets excited at the game, and now everyone moves West of the village to see the next challenge!

The next challenge sees you at a swamp, you shall manoeuvre across poorly built stilts, to kill a bunch a stirges (giant mosquitos with 4 dragon wings).But that alone is too easy. You shall be using Human Boots to stomp them creatures!

We shall be using the combat maps for this, wearing human boots shall cause you -2 penalty to acrobatics and -5ft speed. You will be using normal combat rules for this, everytime you make a move action roll a acrobatics, if you jump roll an additional acrobatics, i'm going to assume all jumps are DC 8 for convenience. If you attack using the human boots, it's considered an unarmed strike. Think like a Goblin this round! Go crazy! Also choose a color, I'll mark the post with that color to denote if you've successfully killed the stirge.

Names when bolded may take their actions.
Poog 10
Reta 4
Chuffy 2
Mogmurch 2

Poog seeing that he gets to go first snickers at the others. "Me show you how this is done." He hops in the boots and moves diagonal and forward to the right twice, and then forward two more squares for 25' of movement. Acrobatics: 1d20 + 2 - 2 ⇒ (10) + 2 - 2 = 10. "Now me show you power of my god!"

Poog focuses on his hold symbol and channels negative energy in a 30' radius from the end of the stilts. It should hit all but two of the stirges and at least two of my allies.

Damage: 2d6 ⇒ (4, 6) = 10 DC 12 for half

I choose Orange

With ease Poog makes his way forward. At the wave of his energy channel there is a silence from the crowd."did....did he just cheat?" And as ten of the striges drop dead, the whole crowd roars with cheers and jeers! He scores 10 more points! Surely his cheating won't go unpunished? Hmm.

it's a little difficult to update the map on mobile right now, take note only the corner right two stirges are remaining.Mogmurch, Reta make a Will save please.

Bold may post

Poog 20
Reta 4
Mogmurch,chuffy 2

"Oy, youse cheated! Mogmurch doesn't need to cheat to be chief!" Mogmurch pulls out one of his bombs as he scurries across the planks. Hurling his bomb at the remaining bugs, he chuckles. "BOOM!"

Move 2 right, 1 diagonally up and right, and 2 up.
Will: 1d20 + 0 ⇒ (3) + 0 = 3

Acrobatics: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 2 = 15
Throw Bomb: 1d10 + 8 ⇒ (7) + 8 = 15
Damage: 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (1, 2) + 2 = 5 closer strige can save for half, DC 13 Reflex, farther strige takes 4, and can save as well.

Reta immediately pulls out her masterwork bow and shouting YOU CHEATSIES!! takes aim to the two stirges left and fires at one of them.

moving closer to be in range of the stirges that are left, expending all movement
Will Save: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (17) + 2 = 19

roll to attack: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (7) + 14 = 21
Attack 1: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

reflex,Stirge near: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (12) + 6 = 18
reflex,Stirge far: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (10) + 6 = 16

The crowd gets very rowdy as everyone breaks the rules! The an uproar of excitement and cheer!

The bomb blows up! But does not take down any stirge but almost immediately an arrow shoots at the closer stirge and takes it out! 2 points! What excitement!

Bold may post

Poog 20
Reta 6 -5hp
Mogmurch 2 -10hp
Chuffy 2

Last stirge -2hp

"My god help me. I no cheatsies. Dis boots smack all da buggies!" Poog laughs

Chuffy who has been observing, steps forward gingerly
Chuffy moves forward 4 squares / 20ft
Acrobatics: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (6) + 10 = 16

He then pulls out his handcrossbow and shouts out"IF SQUASH BUGS MAKE YOUSA CHIEFTAIN, THEN MISSA SQUASH BUG SQUASHER AND BE BIGGER CHIEFTAIN!"

He takes aim...and fires squarely at Poog's butt! Can I consider Poog to be flatfooted? Note that this is not meant to be lethal, Chuffy just wants to show all the goblins who's boss, so feel free to ignore the sneak attack roll
attack: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (18) + 7 = 25
dmg: 1d3 ⇒ 1
sneak attack: 2d6 ⇒ (2, 5) = 7

The Goblins in much anticipation see what Chuffy does. "Oooh Aaah."
Poog please make a reflex save, DC 10.Should you fail, you will fall off the stilts into the marsh.

As he is balancing himself, the crowd taunts him! "Fall! Fall! Fall!"

Going to disallow the sneak attack!

"You no bigger chief Chuffy! Me squash way more than one gobbo! See!" With that, Mogmurch hurls a bomb into the stands!

Bomb: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (2) + 8 = 10
Damage: 2d6 + 2 ⇒ (6, 5) + 2 = 13
Splash damage is 4

Reflex Save: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (4) + 6 = 10

Poog sticks his tongue out at Chuffy as he balances on the stilts. "You no messy with the servant of Zarongel Chuffy! Mesa his favorite

are there any creatures left for us to kill?

Reta shoots Poog because of the uncontrollable desire to be chieftan. She decides to eliminate the competition by getting him to fall into the water. non-lethal damage

I WILL BE CHIEFTAN!!!!!

Perception: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (4) + 14 = 18
Perception: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3

this is turning into anarchy

I'm assuming Mogmurch hurls the bomb into the crowd stands, which means the top right stirge is still at -2 dmg. Reta your rolls say perception. I don't think you can do non-lethal damage with arrows anyway, unless it's blunt?

The crowd scatters at the explosion in the stands, presumably to the next trial, Wise Mummy seems amused at the chaos and awards Mogmurch 5 points! But the challenge is not over! The single Stirge awaits his inevitable demise...

Bold may post actions!
Poog -1hp 20
Mogmurch -10hp 7
Reta -5hp 4
Chuffy 2

Amidst the confusion, Chuffy seizes the opportunity to attack the stirge!

acrobatics: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (4) + 10 = 14
attack: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (14) + 7 = 21
hand crossbow: 1d3 ⇒ 3
sneak attk: 2d6 ⇒ (1, 6) = 7

Yeah, the bomb was tossed into the audience. Whoo! 5 points!

Seeing all the confusion, and the arrows now being pointed at him, Poog decides to end the competition as soon as possible. He jumps twice to reach the stilt two to his right, and fires a single fire bolt at the remaining storage. "I show you what my god help me do. You can't even hurt me nothing."

Acrobatics: 1d20 + 2 - 2 ⇒ (10) + 2 - 2 = 10
Acrobatics: 1d20 + 2 - 2 ⇒ (16) + 2 - 2 = 16
Ranged Touch Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 2 = 22
Damage: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 1 = 6
Confirm Crit: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 2 = 7
Cit Damage: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 1 = 4

To GM, yeah that was an attack roll and damage roll. sorry for the confusion. my bad.
Also, voice of reason gang, should we continue this and see where this goes and potentially killing each other, or continue with the story. hahahahah

Well, if we are playing by PFS rules, directly attacking other players ( PvP) is forbidden.

Goblins get bored quickly. Now that the audience is running off and the stirges are dead, probably best to move on to the next challenge.

Under normal PFS rules, i'd disallow completely attacking each other, but for the sake of this scenario since we're goblins i allowed some "light" attacking cause you want to win, and knocking someone off balance disqualifies them from the game. But if you're purely attacking each other for the sake of it I'll disallow that. You still have to work as a team to successfully complete the scenario, and not completing it earns you no chronicle.

With expert precision Chuffy fires his bow at the last target while Poog also attempts to fire it! But Chuffy's arrow was lethal killing the poor helpless ugly thing earning him the last 2 points. Wise Mummy immediately halts the game and ask you to follow her to the last challenge.

As you walk back to the birdcrunchers cave, you smell the most foul but likely most delicious thing ever! As you approach the cave you see a giant bowl, inside it worms, cabbage, sugar, carrots, beef, mud, and all sorts of ingredients, it's the tribes famous bird pie!

Suddenly a swarm of goblins overcome you, tie you up, and throw you into the pie! Along with 4 helpless eagles. The last challenge, escape the pie, or be cooked alive!

You may only make one action only per round, to escape the ropes, make either a strength or escape artist check, to completely get out of the pie it's a move action. For this scenario, assume you are adjacent to everything in the pie, meaning your allies and the birds. Each round you remain in the pie, please make a fortitude save DC 10, if you fail you take 1 fire damage.

Bold may post
Poog -1hp 20
Mogmurch -10hp 7
Reta -5hp 4
Chuffy 2

Poog, realizing that he's tied up slips into a memory of being shut into a chest when he was younger. "Dis be not good." He says as he grasps for his holy symbol. " Zarongel! Help me show dem da power that you bring me!" Fearing being bound helpless with Eagles in a stew, Poog again channels Negative Energy.

Damage: 2d6 ⇒ (6, 4) = 10 DC 12 Will Save for Half

Fortitude Save: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (7) + 5 = 12

Chuffy squirms against the ropes while muttering "Meesa gonna get out...or PIE TRYING"

Escape Artist: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (14) + 10 = 24
Fortitude Save: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (8) + 3 = 11

Wait, don't I get any points for taking out the last stirge?

Oops, yes you are at 4 points. Everyone make will saves!

The energy wave weakens the bonds but does not break them. Chuffy however skillfully escape his bonds!

Mogmurch and Reta is up!

"Poog, no more burning! Wessa already inna pie!" Mogmurch is getting more and more shrill. "No pie! No pie!"

Will: 1d20 ⇒ 19
Escape Artist: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10
Fortitude Save: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (7) + 6 = 13

The channel should have affected the Eagles too so they don't come after me as I struggle to get out of these bonds...