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I commend the noble warriors committed to rating each and every item. That's a lot of work. I'm doing something simpler.
I've decided to go through the CMI thread and rate all the items by their names.
I will tell you what I expect from the item because of the name, and if the name made me want to read the rest of the item, left me neutral, or made me want to skip it.
I'm going to try to cover a page per post.
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Page 1
Windpath Razor
Expect: A chakram or a straight blade that creates friendly air currents for me and my friends, or blows away enemies.
Impression: Good name, makes me want to read more.
Rod of Versatile Channeling
Expect: Reverse polarity of channeling ala the Versatile Channeler feat.
Impression: Not excited, too straightforward.
Alchemist's Retort
Expect: Alchemy shield (I can't remember if that's really what I expected, but after seeing the item it makes a lot of sense).
Impression: You've got my interest.
Enlightened Jian
Expect: Monk sword, maybe has some meditation function?
Impression: Neutral.
Mail of Ash Woven Ramparts
Expect: Heavy armor that looks like a castle made of ash?
Impression: Not an elegant name. Shorten it, perhaps save "woven" for the description.
Grave-Nettle
Expect: Anti-fey dagger. Skyrim's Nettlebane is at fault for this.
Impression: Solid name, makes me want to read more.
Staff of the Vineyard
Expect: Nature stuff and boozing.
Impression: Vineyard is enough to get my interest in this case,
otherwise utilitarian in letting me know it's a staff.
Angazhan's Bloodthirsty Spear
Expect: A vicious spear.
Impression: I don't know who Angazhan is, and I shouldn't need to. Lose the name, find a better descriptive than "Bloodthirsty" which is somewhat trite.
Chrysalis Carapace
Expect: Bug armor. Maybe if I wear this, I can become a beautiful butterfly.
Impression: Good, it's missing something but I'm afraid I can't pinpoint it. But it is good.
Dirk of Treachery
Expect: Dagger of Backstabbing
Impression: Utilitarian but not attention grabbing. Easily gets lost among other backstab daggers.
Monastic Staff
Expect: A staff for monks. Maybe something to do with meditation?
Impression: Utilitarian name, but boring.
Skewer Shield
Expect: A shield with a long spike coming out of it that I can shield bash my foes with and lock them down.
Impression: Skewer is evocative, pretty good.
Catapult Ring
Expect: A ring that will help me operate siege weapons.
Impression: Eh, I don't really care about siege weapons in most games (Note: Very pleasantly surprised when I did read it).
Living Copperthread Net
Bonus Disclaimer: I read this as Copperhead every time. So I was expecting snakes. I'm probably the only one who did that, but who knows? It does read pretty similar.
Expect: A flimsy net that's animated with some electricity elemental maybe, shocks creatures it entangles.
Impression: "Living" was a bit of a buzzkill. I'd lose it or replace it with another word, as it doesn't excite.
Shield of Compassionate Radiance
Expect: Healing or buffing AoE.
Impression: Filler name. Doesn't excite, but doesn't look amiss in a book.
Jailbird's Sweetheart
Expect: Get-out-of-jail-free card.
Impression: Grandslam name, I want to know what this item does ASAP.
Weapon Trap Shield
Expect: A shield that steals weapons.
Impression: Utilitarian in a weak way. Slightly better would've been making it "Weapontrap" as one word. But there's so many ways to steal weapons, missed opportunity to inject flavor.
Ragathiel's Regalia
Expect: Royal emypreal vengeance.
Impression: So-so. Regalia doesn't tell me what kind of item this is (except by process of elimination due to this year's categories, but else I could've expected a wondrous item).
Perpetual Vortex Staff
Expect: Create vortexes and suck enemies/object/spells towards/into them.
Impression: Interesting name, don't like "Perpetual" though.
Raven Leather
Expect: Armor that gives me blackbird powers.
Impression: Utilitarian, not in a bad way as ravens are inherently interesting. But not a grandslam either.
The Wing Smasher's Hammer
Expect: A throwing hammer that brings down rocs (and everything else).
Impression: Makes me want to read it, but it could be more elegant. I'd prefer "Wing Smasher Hammer".
Courtier's Solitaire
Expect: Social skill bonuses, no idea what slot this is going to take though.
Impression: This name didn't draw me in. Maybe "Solitaire" is just too associated with the boring card game.
Staff of the Hidden Blade
Expect: Staff sword cane. Tricks and silence.
Impression: Utilitarian, sort of in a good way. Staves are tough to make exciting (though some Top 32 pulled it off in a big way).
Staff of the Entwined Elements
Expect: Elemental Admixture Staff.
Impression: Didn't excite. Maybe if it focused on a specific combination of elemental mixing, it could've had a cooler name.
Honeycomb Cuirass
Expect: BEE ARMOR?
Impression: I gotta see this bee armor, man.
Deadeye's Shepherd
Expect: Erastil bow. Maybe it creates boundaries to herd enemies in a certain zone?
Impression: While I came to Erastil Bow as an expectation, it took a few seconds for the cogs to spin to that, rather than an instant recognition. And I only got the bow part because of knowing about Erastil.
Rod of Ghost Teeth
Expect: Creepy spooky stuff. I don't know what this does.
Impression: Presents an interesting premise, solid name.
Grandmaster's Plate
Expect: Plate for the best Fighters. High tier combat maneuver stuff.
Impression: Solid name, I want to see what my new grandmaster powers do.
Sightstealer Rapier
Expect: A standing ovation, g$$*!&nit.
Impression: This is my item. I'm still not sure if adding "rapier" was good or not.
Thieving Buckler
Expect: A small shield that steals small things.
Impression: Utilitarian, missing a spark.
Dimensional Skewer
Expect: A ghost touch phase locking polearm.
Impression: Cool words, cool name.
Phantom Guardian's Ring
Expect: Summon a spiritual ally to defend you, or invisible manipulations of some sort that defend you.
Impression: Pretty cool.
Mummer's Slapstick
Expect: Jokes. A club that doesn't deal damage, but sends enemies flying.
Impression: This is a joke item, right? The name is otherwise alright, but I don't expect to take this seriously.
Stop beating yourself up over whether or not to add Rapier!
It was a good name either way!
Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9
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You aren't the only one who read "Copperhead".
Fun story: it was originally called the "Living Silverthread Net", and the net was woven with silver. My pit crew pointed out that if I'm using silver, does it count as a silver weapon? How does it interact with Lycanthropes?
I immediately decided to go with a different material to keep from putting too much into the item.
@Brigg -- and didn't even think of people reading it as copperhead. Oh well, sorry about that. :)
Glad I could surprise you, Petty. : ) (Heh; ironically, I'm listening to Tom Petty right now...)
And Thunderfrog is right. Honestly, I prefer it with rapier. Most of the specific weapons in the CRB have the weapon type as part of the name in some way.
Yeah, Sightstealer alone would sound better if it was a wondrous item. Or perhaps an artifact. I prefer it with rapier as well.
Thanks guys. Honestly I didn't mean this thread to stealthily beat myself up.
@Briggs: Perhaps Wireweave?
Credit goes to my pit crew for Windpath Razor. I debated between Djinn-Path Razor, Djinn Warblade, Air Render, Djinn Pathrender, Djinn Windslicer, and Windpath Razor. Anthony Adam, Curiagh, and Jacob Michaels helped me pick the best one.
However, I curse myself for not keeping the djinn tie-in on the item's physical description!
Petty. Let it be known that Catapulting Full Plate, was suppose to be Siege Mail.
Siege Mail's a great name.
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Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9
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Thanks guys. Honestly I didn't mean this thread to stealthily beat myself up.
@Briggs: Perhaps Wireweave?
That is so funny! "Wireweave" was a word I wondered would weld in well. Well, I wonder which way it wold have went if I went with wireweave...?
Yes, that was intentional. But seriously, I did think "wireweave" at one point.
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Page 2:
Riftcarver Bow
Expect: Bow that makes portals.
Impression: Solid name, read more.
Rerouting Shield
Expect: Redirects attacks.
Impression: Utilitarian, could see it in a book, but not excited.
Rod of Illusory Casting
Expect: Faking spells.
Impression: Naming rods is hard, this brings an interesting concept to the fore however. Could be better, but it's got my interest.
Dwarven Armor of Exploration
Expect: Dwarven = Stone armor, Stonecunning.
Impression: Nothing super exciting in the name. Serviceable.
Gnome Splat-Pelter
Expect: A catapult that launches gnomes into walls for comedic effect.
Impression: Evocative name, so it catches the eye. The more I think about Splat-Pelter though, the less I like it.
BLACK-AND-WHITE SWORD
Expect: Sword of Light and Shadow. A sword with two polar opposite aspects that serve one purpose.
Impression: CAPS. Tints alone aren't interesting enough.
Varisian Dancing Chain
Expect: A spiked chain or whip with the Dancing property, or some wondrous item like a belt.
Impression: I'm not too familiar with Varisia so I'm not sure what I'm getting into. Maybe this would be more exciting if I knew the region.
Springheart
Expect: Renewal, life.
Impression: A great name but I have no idea what sort of slot this item is going to be.
Raw Meat Hook
Expect: An Ogre Hook that embeds itself in foes.
Impression: Evocative but in a gross way. Why'd it have to be "Raw"? The squick discourages me.
Shield of the Fallen
Expect: A shield for characters seeking redemption, either for themselves or others.
Impression: Interesting idea, I want to see how it executes.
Betrayer's Blade
Expect: Dagger of Backstabbing.
Impression: Doesn't distinguish itself from all the other blades for rogues out there, I'm expecting more of the same.
Warbreaker's Staff
Expect: Someone's been reading Brandon Sanderson. If they haven't, then I expect spells to break up fights like Calm Emotions and walls.
Impression: Cool name, Sanderson cred. Lose the possessive.
Ring of the Clockwork Sentinel
Expect: Beep boop I no longer need to sleep, but won't someone wind me up?
Impression: Clockwork Sentinel is cool, let's see what's going on.
Talon
Expect: Deathclaw Gauntlets from F3.
Impression: Short and simple, but lacks a spark. I prefer it to long names that also lack a spark, but it's better to have a spark.
Celerity Blade
Expect: Sword of Haste.
Impression: As above, this is short and simple, but has a spark. Celerity is a cool word.
Outrider's Band
Expect: A ring for mounted scouting/harrying.
Impression: Utilitarian, could see it in a book but wouldn't be excited.
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It's been pointed out that the Judges asked most reviews to be kept to the CMI thread. Sorry about cluttering the board, not sure what to do about it now so I'm just trampling right on.
Page 3
Sleeper's Vessel
Expect: Hm, not sure. Something a sleeper agent would wear?
Impression: Cool name, not really sure what I'm getting but I want to find out.
Ring Of Utmost Need
Expect: A ring that helps you out when you need it most.
Impression: "Utmost Need" is very urgent, so I wanted to read it.
Cryohydra's Coil
Expect: A cold themed Cat-o’-Nine-Tails that grows more heads.
Impression: Very cool.
Arroweater Shield
Expect: A shield that protects from arrows. Maybe it actually gets charged by "eating" arrows.
Impression: Utilitarian, in a slightly positive way.
Thriving branch
Expect: A club that can grow bigger? Plant powers?
Impression: Somewhat interesting, but "thriving" might be better saved for the description text.
Breakaway Sword of Beguiling
Expect: A sword that gets lodged in the other person and...makes me their friend?
Impression: Contradicting name, let's see what it does.
Shillelagh of Legions
Expect: A druid's summoning (quarter)staff.
Impression: Shillelagh makes me think of nature and fey, Legion makes me think of a tightly organized army. They don't quite go together.
HERMETIC ARMOR
Expect: Sealed armor, protection from gas/liquid.
Impression: CAPS. Hermetic isn't a word that excites me, but I can see other people getting excited about it.
Page 4
Disruption Disc
Expect: A chakram that either destroys undead (per the disruption property) or messes with casters.
Impression: Pretty good name.
Traitor's Blade
Expect: Dagger of Backstabbing.
Impression: Blends together with all of the other Daggers of Backstabbing.
Rod of Resonance
Expect: Hm, some spell echo function probably.
Impression: Short and simple, but in an interesting way. Resonance is a cool thing.
RHEUMATIC ROD
Expect: What it says on the tin.
Impression: CAPS. And I'd rather not have rheumatism in fantasy. Not excited to see it here.
Mimic Skin
Expect: Sticky camouflage armor.
Impressions: Mimics are cool! I want to see this mimic item.
Norgorber's Lens
Expect: Spectacles.
Impression: I don't know who Nogorber is, so I don't know what this is going to be about.
Thundering Shield
Expect: Shield bash to bring the thunder! Sonic damage, deafening.
Impression: Utilitarian in a slightly positive way. But could be far more interesting.
Ring of forgotten acquaintance
Expect: A ring that tells me the name of that guy I met 20 minutes ago.
Impression: Alright, I'm not sure what this does, but I am kind of interested in finding out.
Tempest Bow
Expect: Wind bow.
Impression: "Tempest" is inherently cool as words go, so it's a good name. But it could tell me more about what I'm getting into.
Dynamic Staff
Expect: A staff that has changing functions, or maybe does transformations.
Impressions: "Dynamic" is a cool word, so it's a pretty good name.
Staff of Thin Air
Expect: When you're around this staff, it's hard to breathe. Fly high, magically choke enemies.
Impression: I like it, promises some originality. Let's see what it does.
Skywalker’s Cloth
Expect: A blindfold that'll teach me to use the force.
Impression: I can't get past Luke Skywalker on this one, sorry.
Springheart
Thank PA! I thought Sightstealer was pretty evocative myself.
These are great.
Page 5
Aegis of the Martyr
Expect: A shield that'll make me shield others.
Impression: Aegis is a cool word, but I don't like Martyr. Overall neutral.
Blade of Unabating Wounds
Expect: Cursed wounds that can't be healed/regenerated until there's some purification.
Impression: Not too exciting, utilitarian (though a little more edge than some other utilitarian names).
Chakram of Cyclic Existence
Expect: Hm, a Chakram that maybe phases in and out of existence of the material plane ala blink. There has to be a twist that makes this a good thing.
Impression: Intriguing in a good way. Good name.
Demonmaw Gnasher
Expect: A weapon with a lot of teeth, maybe some fire.
Impression: Cool name, visceral without being gross.
Serpentine Stave
Expect: Snake powers.
Impression: Utilitarian in a flat way. Not sure why Stave rather than Staff.
Staff of Strategems
Expect: Tactical powers (repositioning).
Impression: Stratagem is a cool word, enough to stand alone next to Staff.
Sarenrae’s Desert Caller
Expect: Fire, sandstorms. Could be a scimitar or a staff.
Impression: This name would work even if you lost Sarenrae, and I think it would be better without it. Could be Desertcaller ______.
Housebreaker Bow
Expect: Hawkeye causes massive property damage.
Impression: Cool name.
Blowgun of the Accursed Serpent
Expect: A blowgun that shoots cursed snakes. Or snake-curses.
Impression: Wordy, but still interesting. This could be more elegant.
Blade of the Dark Betrayer
Expect: Dagger of Backstabbing
Impression: I think I've already given some feedback on this one. The words are too generic in fantasy to excite, especially "Dark". Maybe focus on the unique value/function proposition for the name, rather than name it after those that are most likely to use it.
Page 6
The Pen of Mirado
Expect: A wondrous item.
Impression: I don't know who Mirado is, but I do know that pens aren't armor/weapons/staves/rods/rings. Unless it's comically oversized.
Motherly Love
Expect: Healing, protection. Probably in armor form, but maybe a ring.
Impression: Interesting, even though I'm not sure what slot this is going to take.
Axle of Sky and Storm
Expect: Metal and thunder. (If you've seen Fate/Zero, Iskandar's Chariot). Maaaaybe a rod?
Impression: It's a cool name, I want to see if it can sell the Axle as one of the contest item types.
Eremite Rod
Expect: *fires up dictionary.com*
Impression: Sorry, I wasn't familiar with this word before. I had no idea what sort of rod this was. I'd probably skip it in a magic item book unless someone told me I gotta check it out.
Hammer of Besting
Expect: A hammer that, uh, bests opponents? I think that's what all weapons are for, but maybe this gives a bonus to opposed checks.
Impression: Kind of weird to use "Besting" here. There's probably a better name.
Ephemeral Staff
Expect: Short duration conjurations.
Impression: Ephemeral is a cool enough word to stand alone next to Staff.
Staff of the Auraboros
Expect: Wait, is this a typo or a really weird pun? Ouroboros is clearly referenced, so snakes, cycles.
Impression: Assuming it's a typo, I'm expecting mistakes going into this entry.
Staff of the Twinned Path
Expect: Double your spell.
Impression: "Path" is probably a filler word, but it would be interesting if this isn't a spell-doubler and does have something to do with doubling paths.
Cuirass of Distortion
Expect: Armor of displacement
Impression: Utilitarian, doesn't excite.
Energizing Breastplate
Expect: Delete fatigue/exhaustion, maybe get some sparks flying in an elecrtic aura.
Impression: Fairly neutral.
I just wanna say this is a really awesome idea, as the name is the first thing people see, and can really turn people one way or the other before they see your item. Thanks for this!
Thanks, words like that motivate me to keep it coming!
Page 7
Rod of Gravimetric Attraction
Expect: Cause two objects to suddenly shoot at each other.
Impression: Neutral. The words aren't boring, but I don't know what "Gravimetric" is, so I'm assuming it's just gravity+metrics. What do metrics have to do with magic items?
Kudzu Wrap
Expect: Rapid growing plant armor.
Impression: Kudzu is super cool. Great name that tells me what I'm getting without using boring words.
Ring of Remembrance
Expect: Either a memento (what's the function then) or something to improve memory.
Impression: Sounds like an interesting item for a book, but not for a game.
Clangoring Chime
Expect: A wondrous item. Maybe the chime is on a rod or staff? It's gonna keep people up all night.
Impression: Interesting, but not captivating. Seems out of place outside of the wondrous item section.
Counter Shield
Expect: Block with the shield, get an AoO on the oppponent.
Impression: Flat name, not very interested.
Vestment of the Twin Soul
Expect: A robe that got converted into armor for this contest. For effect: Something that can tank death effects for you, maybe confuse scrying attempts?
Impression: "Twin Soul" sounds cool, but if this is armor, vestment falls short (I'm aware of the magic vestment spell).
O-yoroi of the Eternal Flame
Expect: Eastern armor that I'm unfamiliar with, fire damage and resist.
Impression: Eternal Flame is kinda cool, but O-Yoroi turns me off.
Freebooter's Longcoat
Expect: A wondrous item turned armor. Smuggle stuff?
Impression: Interesting for a wondrous item, misplaced outside of it.
Dagger of Dretch Dominion
Expect: Exactly what it says on the tin. Command Dretches.
Impression: Utilitarian, not an overdone concept, but not an exciting one either. I've never wanted to command dretches, a lot of games never even see the buggers.
Corpse Thicket Javelin
Expect: A javelin that turns dead bodies into vegetation.
Impression: Interesting name, could be fit together better though.
Ghastly Plate
Expect: Spooky heavy armor. Probably painted black.
Impression: Short and simple, kind of interesting. Could tell me more though.
Rod of Eldritch Horror
Expect: A rod for those that miss the Alienist PrC.
Impression: Kind of interesting, but also kind of feels like a cop-out to just say "Eldritch Horror" instead of describing it with a less used phrase. Can you imagine a shopkeeper saying "Oh yes, I also have this Rod of Eldritch Horror, 5% off!"?
Dreaming Star
Expect: Shuriken or Starknife that, uh, I'm not sure what it'll do.
Impression: A+ name would flip directly to item after seeing in table of contents.
Lash of Wild Roses
Expect: How do murderhobos express affection? By whipping you with a magically enchanted bouquet.
Impression: It's a cool name, makes me want to check out the item.
Foe Stitcher
Expect: A piercing weapon that ties enemies together.
Impression: Solid name, think it would be better as one word, or maybe hyphenated.
Didn't see this thread untill today. Funny how similarly we were thinking... when we JUST read the name of something.
Page 6
The Pen of Mirado
Expect: A wondrous item.
Impression: I don't know who Mirado is, but I do know that pens aren't armor/weapons/staves/rods/rings. Unless it's comically oversized.
Heh. Yeah. But I'm curious what you think of Lucus' point, especially what I've highlighted below? My explanation of where "Mirado" came from is also there, if you're interested.
Page 6 of Official Critique Thread
Pen of Mirado - Filler - [snip]...I think people would DQ this as a wondrous item, but I think the style of quill you're talking about could very much be used as a weapon, and in this case, it isn't just a case of a wondrous item that acts as a weapon or vice versa. This thing is combat-oriented and all about it being a weapon really. Tying the use of this thing as an effective weapon though to the bard's class ability ensures limited usefulness. All this combines to make this Filler, but its really interesting filler, so there is that.
[/snip]
Thanks for the review, Lucus! I appreciate that you consider this more a weapon than a wondrous item, although I suspect that more often than not it was considered the latter. My inspiration for the name was the Mirado Black Warrior pencil, of which I'd just bought two, and used one of them to write up the Pen. As I was concerned about IP infringement, I googled the name and found out that 'mirado' is also a word in Spanish which means "careful"; so, I thought I was OK on that score.
Thanks for the review, in any case!
Phil
Hey Phil,
I'd consider it a weapon if it was a short sword that also counted as a magically counted as a calligraphy tool (and could draw magic circles, or interact with Glyph spells?), rather than a pen that magically had a damage die.
I've never heard of the Mirado Black Warrior pencil (or maybe I have, I don't really pay attention to pencil names).
My greatest suggestion (disclaimer: I'm not an RPG industry professional, this is my feedback as a fan) is: Your name must be able to stand alone without further explanation. It should tell me what I'm getting, and it should do so in an interesting way. If I can't guess at the item's function from the name, the only reason I'd flip to it in a book is if the name was extremely interesting.
In your case, I feel like the name was designed for your home game, where you (as the creator) would be personally introducing the item to the players, then explain it to them.
For future RPGSS competitions, I highly advise people to avoid proper nouns in item names. It places a burden of knowledge on the reader, which means some people will be unable to connect with your item. And you want to connect with everyone.
In fact, I'm willing to brainstorm renaming items with anyone that would like to. Just PM me your full item in a spoiler, and let me know if you had any other name ideas. Or PM me your item without the name, and I'll tell you what I'd consider calling it. Whatever sounds good, but don't make me work to find your item because I'm lazy.
RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32
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Eremite Rod
Expect: *fires up dictionary.com*
Impression: Sorry, I wasn't familiar with this word before. I had no idea what sort of rod this was. I'd probably skip it in a magic item book unless someone told me I gotta check it out.
You should have searched the PRD. Then you would have found the eremite kyton, which I based the item on. One of the hazards of basing an item on something in the rules/setting is hoping the voters at least have a passing familiarity.
When I was looking up information about an item, I searched the Archives of Nethys, Pathfinder Wiki, and the PRD before looking to other sources. If I did use an online search, I made sure to include a +Pathfinder in the search.
I went to dictionary.com because "Eremite" sounds like a real word (probably because it is).
Devils and Demons are famous enough that you can count on players recognizing the Balor and the Pit Fiend, kytons are a passing familiarity.
Even knowing about the Pit Fiend, I wouldn't make the connection if you pitched me an item called a "Pit Rod". So there's a word of caution for naming items with actual words that are also used as part of a monster's name.
Balor Rod, sure (though not a good name, at least I know what I'm getting), Pit Rod, nope.
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Hey Phil,
I'd consider it a weapon if it was a short sword that also counted as a magically counted as a calligraphy tool (and could draw magic circles, or interact with Glyph spells?), rather than a pen that magically had a damage die.
I've never heard of the Mirado Black Warrior pencil (or maybe I have, I don't really pay attention to pencil names).
My greatest suggestion (disclaimer: I'm not an RPG industry professional, this is my feedback as a fan) is: Your name must be able to stand alone without further explanation. It should tell me what I'm getting, and it should do so in an interesting way. If I can't guess at the item's function from the name, the only reason I'd flip to it in a book is if the name was extremely interesting.
In your case, I feel like the name was designed for your home game, where you (as the creator) would be personally introducing the item to the players, then explain it to them.
For future RPGSS competitions, I highly advise people to avoid proper nouns in item names. It places a burden of knowledge on the reader, which means some people will be unable to connect with your item. And you want to connect with everyone.
In fact, I'm willing to brainstorm renaming items with anyone that would like to. Just PM me your full item in a spoiler, and let me know if you had any other name ideas. Or PM me your item without the name, and I'll tell you what I'd consider calling it. Whatever sounds good, but don't make me work to find your item because I'm lazy.
Thanks, Petty; good stuff. I've done a re-write based on the feedback I've gotten on these boards; The Vengeful Scribe's Penknife. Check it out if you like; feedback always welcome!
Cheers,
Phil