stick finger in slime toilet to make the satisfying fart noise...
Convinces the DNC to run Darth Vader as a candidate for President. He's got the poll numbers, he's got the name recognition, and he's even undocumented. What more could they ask for?
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I tried convincing the RNC to run Darth Tater as a candidate for President, but they refused, concerned their base would see him as "too intellectual."
The RNC has Trump. ;-)
I understand that Cthulhu doesn't form parties, and he usually gets everybody else to run ... away from him.
Bananas well-being angles trollish on the magnet fluff.
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"Sir, do you hoots toward my wife?!"
"Sir, I do not hoots toward you wife, I merely hoots for joy. For your wife, I show nothing but a bevelled copper wedge"
"A wedge? Did you jesting? Are you joculate? Do you mock and chortle me like the beaming ape in glowing coat and hat?"
"No, Sir, you mistake at me. Your choler is rised and you undercrank. I am not ape, I am "
Ooo, the new season of Slaadton Abbey has already started!
Beware the flock of Norwegian Blue Parrots.
Red is the yellow bacon on tape with a picture tab.
There once were two Slaadi from Limbo
Who, on hearing Jim Reeves singing 'Bimbo',
With wild yelps of desire,
Both peed in the fire
Then rolled on the floor, legs akimbo.
Erase the number purple scissors twist.
Sheep shelves Sheen smells rye fee eeyore
Trump humps bumped stumps why knee flumphed spore
Spruce moose clam juice fry thee puce floor
Oh Toodles!
Sautéed frappé toupée soufflé nigh me no more
Glam glands glow low lung guns galore
Sticky!
Would chucks shucking wood chuck charcoal briquettes in the fire?
Bamboo.
Beef is Nifty!
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Dear Auntie Clamps,
My boyfriend wishes me to varnish him backwards, but I have a Milkypop up each nose instead. What should I do?
'Desperate'
Dear 'Desperate',
In having a Milkypop up each nose, you are making life very unpleasant for people with only one nose and have committed a dreadful 'Faux Pas', as the French say; I'm afraid that means, in English, that you're not his real dad, being a lettuce and iron Guyanan Screeching Bonnet, and are instead an unexpurgated copy of 'Planks I Have No Idea About' by the Ba'al Shem Tov, you beast.
I hope that helps,
Yours,
Auntie Clamps.
Walrpdanmurlap.
o)_(o
{belches, scratches self}
*scratches belch, selfs*
Sgnarbenfidplaart cnbopryfthhrs koylgem gnglwima jorfvgnim SPHAAAAARSHT!
grabs slaadlings by the shoulders and shakes them violently.
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We has violent shoulder shakings??? WEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
Do it again! Do it again!
* Slaadlings are shivering with antici...*
You can cut through a tank barrel with a banana, after bisecting 3bn peasants and writing a steamy romantic novel about a strong-willed, statuesque blonde multi-speed lathe that's in love with a naughty cowboy.
That's what she said!
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...pation!
* Slaadlings are surprised no one else said it first.*
Gmaaani fthzrka GAMGAMGAMFNAA!
picks up Slaadlings and tosses of them at Flute Slaad and the other at Sunomono Slaad
Then grabs Tossed Slaad by the shoulders and screams in his face
THEY TAKE AFTER THEIR MOTHER!!
♪ ♫ We been dancin' with
Mr. Spawning Stone
He's been knockin'
He won't leave me alone... ♩ ♬
Ooh fanglangalang, dinglelingleingding
Wangatangatang wossidgesausage fiddlefo
Billywillyillious integralschedule shangaloo
Honky donkey dang dang dang dong.
Now, boogie with Henry Kissinger or I'll spank you seventeen ways to next Winterval, see if I don't.
Quack.
*tappy tappy tap*
Quack.
*tappy tappy tap*
Bah Weep Grah Na Weep Ninnybong? {offers handful of cheez-its}
Adequate doesn't eat cheez-its, as they are disgusting. I agree with him on this. We differ on our preferred nibbles. He likes to eat grass, while I prefer the soles of the lawful. Especially if the soles have been well used and are starting to wear through at the heel. Yummm...so good.
*continues hiding*
Adequate doesn't eat cheez-its, as they are disgusting. I agree with him on this.
I can tolerate much, but slandering the crosses-all-alignments deliciousness of Cheez-Its is gastronomic heresy! Heresy!!!
Cheese Nips, on the other hand, are a cursed blasphemy engineered by the demon lord Treeshaver and manufactured by crack-addled gully dwarves living in a treant's butt.
*Dreams of Cheese Nips and Cheez-Its (wondering if there's a letter missing), fondly remembering his time as a tax-free cymbal and elbow set in a Swiss strip club. Slides. Squawks. Effervesces.*
*consults tome of slaadi legal code*
Tis true. Besmirching the good name and great taste of Cheese Its is a crime punishable by marination.
Hey, did you guys know we had a legal code?
Yeeeeesss. I rewrote it last week. It's probably due for a revision again. Someone get the paint and brussel sprouts, yeeeeessss.