Need advice

[wpbjr]

Does anyone have any experience writing their own campaigns?

If so would any over you be willing to look over my chapter one?

it is written four 3 or 4 players of little experience. I am hoping to have about 3 to 4 hours of game-play.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nsqU15kx14u7Bu1Jz8AXeF0Y28btsAGLot-Mjd9 nJpw/edit?usp=sharing

[Joynt Jezebel]

I tried to have a look but the address you give won't take me to the document. :(

[wpbjr]

Joynt Jezebel wrote:

I tried to have a look but the address you give won't take me to the document. :(

Tear

lets see if i can cut and paste it in.

[wpbjr]

I have maps in the original doc cut and past this link it should load my Google Doc for it.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nsqU15kx14u7Bu1Jz8AXeF0Y28btsAGLot-Mjd9 nJpw/edit?usp=sharing

Each of you have booked passage on board the J.H.S. Celeste. Her stated trip voyage is the Island triangle of the arperigo. You just departed the Elven Island of ___ and are headed South West with the dropping winds. They will carry you to the Human settlement of Harmens. once there the crew will unload the Elven wine and fine goods for the Raw materials gathered here. The settlers are always happy to see a traders vessels. It is a common practice to hire extra hands and to lay on extra gunpowder. Piretise have been known to harse ships traveling this part of the triangle as Elven goods are always highly sought after.
The Lady Celeste
Thus far the only true challenge has been the weather. The “Lady Celeste” as the crew calls the ship, has been riding the storm front for a week straight with strong winds and rain pushing her forward at a high clip. It has been a fortnight since anyone has seen the sun or stars but the navigalale spells say that you are well on course.
Conversations with the crew reveal --
We are well ahead of plan
Pirate activity has been worse this last season
There is a new monster being seem in storms as of late.
Make up random stuff about captain and or crew members

On day 8 as you take a very uneasy dinner in the galley a loud whistle is heard piercing the noise from the main deck. ( Kn: general / Profession: Salor Check: 10 )
Fail: The players do not translate the whistle
Pass: Players knows general quarters and battlestations was called.
02 ) The room erupts into madness as every crew men jumps up and runs for the door. Just as the players reach the door to the mess hall a large fireball hits the bulkhead of the mess hall. The starboard side of the ship splinters as the open sea is laid bare before you.

Battle Map One:

02a) the players need to make Acrobatics checks to reenter the Galley (Room 7). Dc 20 1d6 fire damage if fail. Check each round players are in room.
Perception check once while in room DC 1 -10 Fail
DC 11 -15 Faint squid like out line with bright red coloring
DC 16 - 20 A flash of lightning reveals a squid shape with Fireballs shooting forth from the mid section of the Squid.
DC 21- + same as above + men shapes crawling over the Squid shape and Leaping towards the Lady Celeste and attacking crewmen.
As the players run into the galley the rain and winds come pouring into the room. Only a handful of crew men remained in the room. No one has serious injuries.

02b) the Players Head into the Passenger rooms (room 4) to collect their gear.
Acrobatics Checks (DC 20) to remain upright and to collect any gear.
Nothing really happen in here. Not players should not have all their gear at dinner so if they do not collect their gear then they will not have it latter.

02c) Rooms 5 & 8 are locked. With no time to try and force them open. If the players do start to take the time 1d4 Pirates come from the Gally and Main door pinning the players in the hallway.

02d) This room is lagle empty holding a massive collection of maps and charts with a large table in the middle for display of said maps. Kn / profision (DC 15) check will allow the players to find 4 useful maps. 1. Overview of the known world
2. Overview of the Elven Archipelago
3. Overview of the Dwarven Archipelago
4. Overview of the Human Archipelago

02e) As the Players make their way onto the main deck if they had not made the Perception check from 02a then do so now. Also one last major Acrobatics cheek (DC 25) as the Squid Rams the Lady Celeste. Fail they are knocked down just outside the main door between the steps.
The sight greeting the players is a large hand to hand melee taking place as pirates ( 9 of them ) are engaged in combat with crew men of the Lady Celeste. You can hear the First Mate yelling orders on the winds as musket fire and steel clash before them. Without much warning the pirates fall onto the players attacking any that fell

(Pirate)
Half-orc rogue 3
NE Medium humanoid (human, orc)
Init +1; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +7
DEFENSE
AC 14, touch 12, flat-footed 12 (+2 armor, +1 Dex, +1 dodge)
HP 19 (3d8+6)
Fort +3, Ref +4, Will +2
Defensive Abilities evasion, orc ferocity, trap sense +1
OFFENSE
Speed 30 ft.
Melee rapier +4 (1d6+2/18-20)
Ranged mwk hand crossbow +4 (1d4/19-20)
Space 5 ft., Reach 5 ft.
Special Attacks sneak attack +2d6
STATISTICS
Str 15, Dex 13, Con 14, Int 10, Wis 12, Cha 10
Base Atk +2; CMB +4; CMD 17
Feats Athletic, Dodge, Storm-Lashed (see below)
Skills Acrobatics +8, Climb +8, Intimidate +5, Knowledge (local) +6, Knowledge (nature) +2, Linguistics +4, Perception +7, Profession (sailor) +7, Stealth +8, Swim +8
Languages Common, Orc, Polyglot
SQ intimidating, orc blood, rogue talent (ledge walker), trapfinding +1
Gear smoke sticks (2)
Other Gear leather armor, masterwork hand crossbow with 20 bolts, rapier, dice

(Crewmen)
Human rogue (smuggler) 3
CN Medium humanoid (human)
Init +6; Senses Perception +7
DEFENSE
AC 15, touch 12, flat-footed 13 (+3 armor, +2 Dex)
HP 20 (3d8+3)
Fort +0, Ref +5, Will +2
OFFENSE
Speed 30 ft.
Melee mwk scimitar +3 (1d6/18-20), sap +4 (1d6 nonlethal)
Ranged shortbow +4 (1d6/x3)
Space 5 ft., Reach 5 ft.
Special Attacks sneak attack +2d6
STATISTICS
Str 10, Dex 14, Con 8, Int 12, Wis 13, Cha 17
Base Atk +2; CMB +2; CMD 14
Feats Improved Initiative, Toughness, Weapon Finesse
Skills Appraise +7, Bluff +9, Diplomacy +9, Disguise +9, Intimidate +9, Knowledge (local) +7, Perception +7, Sense Motive +7, Sleight of Hand +8, Stealth +8
SQ briberyPOTIS, conceal itemPOTIS, distractionPOTIS, rogue talents (fast stealth)
ECOLOGY
Environment any oceans or coastlines
Organization solitary, pair, or team (3-5)
Treasure NPC gear (masterwork studded leather, sap, masterwork scimitar, shortbow with 20 arrows, potion of eagle's splendor, potions of invisibility [2], other treasure)
A Massive wave Washes the players into the sea. This happens at any point the players are completely overwhelmed by the pirates or right after the last one is defeated. The players then awake on the shore line of an uncharted Island.
Exp rewards breakdown total posible ( 10,000 exp )
1000 each for gathering gear and Skill checks
600 for each pirate killed
300 for each pirate faced but not killed
1200 discretion for good Role play or participation.

[avr]

Paizo's forums drop a space into any very long 'word'. You can get around it by creating a link, like this:

link

What level are the PCs? Also, note that if the pirates successfully set up a flank and your inexperienced players don't do something about it, a character dying is a definite possibility if you don't kick in the massive wave fast enough.

[Joynt Jezebel]

Shows promise.

If you want to work up to publishing an adventure path I think you need an ongoing plot and story however. As avr says, you need the level of the PCs. It needs a spell check/ edit but that is to be expected.

[wpbjr]

avr wrote:

What level are the PCs? Also, note that if the pirates successfully set up a flank and your inexperienced players don't do something about it, a character dying is a definite possibility if you don't kick in the massive wave fast enough.

I was hoping to use crewmen to avoid the pirats flanking the players.

I told everyone to roll up lvl 5 PC's. It has been my experience that these type of casual players get irritated easy with lvl 1 characters. They want to do the cool stuff that make each class special.

Since this is Chapter one of what I hope is 20 ish chapter story death would be bad.

[wpbjr]

Joynt Jezebel wrote:

Shows promise.

If you want to work up to publishing an adventure path I think you need an ongoing plot and story however. As avr says, you need the level of the PCs.

The goal is not publishing at this moment. Not to say later I might clean everything up. I am just Barry busy most days and a week will not be enough time to write a convensing narrative. So I am split it up into 20 or so chapters. This is Chapter one. The main story involves the squid ship hunting down an other ship the players find in chapter 3.

I am just concerned that I placed enough in this chapter. I played with the idea of having the players help fight the storm before the attack.

[Goth Guru]

With the extra levels at the start, you open the option of a PC being a selkie or other monster. You could also have a rumor being about one of the characters.

Occult classes might attract ghosts and suchlike.

[Pizza Lord]

I've never written out my own campaign (though I've had them in 3.5, just not all written out). I do edit such works, however. Yours definitely needs editing and spellchecking (I was tempted to do so as suggestions in the GoogleDoc, but without permission I won't).

These are all just observations, opinions, and suggestions. Don't take them to be harsh cut-downs or anything.
To save page space:

The galley:

Some thoughts, on ships like that galleon, I believe the Galley is more used as the kitchen than as a mess hall. I think it would mostly be for cooking and preparation and storing some foodstuffs, rather than as a dining area (though the cook or a couple crewmen could probably eat in there.) I believe most crew would take their meals on the main deck or (because of the storm) below decks (storage deck). The captain and passengers (at least the ones with their own cabins, like the PCs) will likely take their meals in those cabins. PCs are different however, so during the days or such leading up to this attack, you should probably gauge out how each one typically takes their meals (with the sailors, dining with the captain if they've made a good impression, in their quarters, etc.), noting that in this case inclement weather might prevent them from being on deck (but even then, some PCs are gung-ho). To that end, you need to plan for a PC being in a different location and what they might see or hear from that area.

The attack:

Since it's mealtime, it's probably still light out, but you should note the atmosphere (is it just stormy and dark, is it raining, is their thunder and lightning, high waves, etc.)

I would suggest changing the location of the attack (the hull breach) from the Galley (main deck, 7) to the Storage Deck cargo space beneath the main deck. You can do both if you really want. This way, you can catch any PCs eating in their rooms (they can see the hole and damage to the galley when they step out) and any dining or gaming with crewmen in the cargo hold. Otherwise, you need to catch the PCs at the exact time they're standing in line to be dished out food at the galley.

Pirate tactics:

There's not a lot to go on for the pirates' tactics or what the squid does or what the range is (nor how many pirates). I get that most of this is in your mind, so you tend to fill in the gaps and I also know that the number of pirates is left ambiguous to help move the plot along in case you need more or less to get the PCs to where you want them (the next chapter). Do all the pirates rush the ship or do 6 or so stay on the squid and fire their hand crossbows at targets on deck or visible through the hull breaches?

There should be notes on what the pirates are after: are they trying to kill the sailors, are they trying to capture the ship, are they just grabbing loot and cargo and getting back on the squid, are they trying to capture PCs or passengers for ransom, etc. For instance, will they generally ignore PCs that don't attack them if they're looting the cargo hold, only defending themselves if attacked?

Crewmen tactics:

Like the PCs, you should figure out what the crewmen will focus on doing. You have the initial stampede described. Is there a guy in a crow's nest? Are the ballista manned? What does the pilot do? Where is the captain, the first mate, the Officer on Deck, etc. and what do they say or do? Like the PCs, the crewmen shouldn't be armed or armored either, should they? Maybe a few on watch or on deck maybe (but it's a storm and mealtime for most). Their armor is quick to don, but will they take time to do so? If not, this should be noted in their stat-block that they shouldn't get the AC bonus. Granted, their weapons are likely kept in the cargo or space they sleep (and are likely eating at), so they may not need to go far (but I believe on typical ships, most crewmen are not armed (or allowed to be armed), maybe a knife or a gaff hook that could be grapped. Most weapons are stored in the armory under lock and key held by an officer (in case of attacks like this) to prevent easy mutiny. Even if that's not the case on this ship or instance, still need to plan the first few rounds of activity and such: donning armor, grabbing weapons, drinking potions, etc.

Pirate and crewmen stat-blocks:

I don't know what the Storm-Lashed feat does, but that's okay.

I generally avoid looking through stat-blocks, but I have to mention. There is way too much masterwork gear unless we are truly dealing with elite NPC squads. The pirates all have masterwork hand crossbows (which are super expensive). Second, none of them have the Exotic Weapon Proficiency to use them without penalty. Give them shortbows like the crewmembers and 20 masterwork arrows. Those will have the same effect without having a hugely unbelievable armory going on and won't require a feat change. Additionally (and this is opinion), a whole crew of half-orc pirates wielding rapiers while the crewmen use scimitars is a bit unusual (but there could be a reason). I would probably just make it scimitars all around (exact same stats and a whole lot cheaper, just not finesse-able, which is usually the point, but the half-orcs don't really benefit from that). Plus, they can't use the rapiers two-handed to benefit from Strength and a half damage when needed, which they can do with scimitars. Only a +1 damage, but that's just logical and makes sense.

Then you have the crewmen, all with masterwork weapons. I can see one or two, definitely an officer or first mate, but everyone? I'd recommend making them ordinary scimitars. Give them Weapon Focus (scimitar) and drop Weapon Finesse (because why?, scimitars aren't finesse-able). Also, give everyone a dagger or knife for a backup weapon. Easy, believable.

Then you have a selection of potions on the crewmen, I don't know if that's meant to be for most of them, but why are they carrying potions of eagle's splendor? I can see a cat's grace or even a bulls' strength. And two potions of invisibility each? I get that they're rogues and invisibility is great for sneak attacks, but if that's intentional, you definitely need a Tactics write-up explaining how they use them and what they try and do. Not even a potion of cure light wounds or a potion of certain grip; those would be more logical.

Squid tactics:

I assume it's fiendish or something. You should utilize the squid more effectively. What's it doing all this time? How far from the ship is it? Obviously it shouldn't just be submerged if it's got pirates on it, at least until they all board, but not if you are going to hold some back as missile support. What happens if the PCs damage it sufficiently (possibly manning the ballista and targeting it)? Does it keep firing fireballs and how much damage do they really do if a PC gets caught in one? I get that the hull breach is story and plot, so probably don't want it dealing as much damage as would really be needed to blast through that thickness of wood (after halving damage for energy and then hardness).

You need to at least plan out believable action to be on going and what the PCs see. For instance, maybe you note that it directs its first attacks (with the long tentacles) at the ballistae on the deck and anyone trying to reach them to prevent the siege weapons from being used against it. Maybe you also describe that there are two to four shorter tentacles latched onto the breach (maybe four at a large breach in the cargo hold, two at the galley), kind of like boarding hooks and grapnels would be used in an typical boarding action.

Then, even if the PCs can't attack the squid directly, you can have them hacking at the tentacles (this doesn't really hurt the squid in any way, they grow back and it has more if to latch on if you need to stretch the fight out). Damage to the tentacles shouldn't really harm the actual squid's hit points in this case. Every so often, you can have a free tentacle slip into a breach and sweep back and forth (like an area attack with a Reflex save to avoid, otherwise slight damage and knocked prone). Pirates in the area should be hit as well, but maybe they get a small bonus because they are aware of this tactic.

Also, you should consider having a few of the PCs' items survive: in a chest washed up on sure or maybe the shattered rear portion of the ship (assuming you have it destroyed) which housed their cabin is just visible off-shore on a reef or something where you can place a few important items, just in case a PC didn't legitimately have time to reach them (or the items are really important, like a spellbook). Otherwise, most can be damaged by the seawater if not properly secured, that's certainly fair.

[Goth Guru]

Is the squid some kind of submersible glamered to look alive?
Is it some kind of mutant with enough body cavity to fit crew quarters, like those space whales that aliens travel inside?

A Kraken that contains symbiotic orcs would be a fierce monster.

[avr]

I'm betting it's a spelljammer vessel actually. Probably a mind flayer run one. The galleon map is from TSR & I recognise the style.

[wpbjr]

avr wrote:

I'm betting it's a spelljammer vessel actually. Probably a mind flayer run one. The galleon map is from TSR & I recognise the style.

Guilty as charged thou I am not doing a Spelljammer campaign "yet"

The Ship is a Squid ship with heavy mods. thus the craft can not attack. the main Villain of my campaign is a LVL 20 Broodmaster Summoner. that i am still writing. He did not feel the need to be involved with this battle a simple grounding vessel is no match for his Ship.

Pizza Lord wrote:

Also, you should consider having a few of the PCs' items survive: in a chest washed up on sure or maybe the shattered rear portion of the ship (assuming you have it destroyed) which housed their cabin is just visible off-shore on a reef or something where you can place a few important items, just in case a PC didn't legitimately have time to reach them (or the items are really important, like a spellbook). Otherwise, most can be damaged by the seawater if not properly secured, that's certainly fair.

Chapter two starts with the players washed ashore and yes some gear and maybe NPC survive the players are heave melee so I might have a lvl one cleric survive just as a bone.

thank you Pizza Lord for the rest of your help as well. were it works (most of it) I will be writing and expanding.

Preview of Title Chapter Two : Awake the Zataran

[Pizza Lord]

wpbjr wrote:

The Ship is a Squid ship with heavy mods. thus the craft can not attack.

Aww... my scene was better! PCs hacking at tentacles, trying to free their ship while orc raiders balance and run over to the ship on them. Describing the scene where a tentacle rakes the hold and snatches a sailor to drag screaming out in the waves!

Quote:

thank you Pizza Lord for the rest of your help as well. were it works (most of it) I will be writing and expanding.

You are most welcome. It sounds like an exciting story. When you want to publish it and you want someone to pull their hair out and scream at their screen while spellchecking it and editing with OCD-like focus (and can pay my nominal per-word fee), you let me know.

Quote:

Preview of Title Chapter Two : Awake the Zataran

Zataran? Authentic New Orlean's cuisine? Oh, that's Zatarain's...

That almost sounds like 'zaratan' though; a giant turtle that resembles an island. Say, wouldn't that be a cool idea? If the island they ended up on was a... Oh... yeah. Your spelling... I forgot.
:p <--- (playful emoticon. Do you kids still use those?)

[wpbjr]

Zataran? vs zaratan

Two lousy letters My Dyslexia shows up in funny ways some times.
Pizza Lord if you think the type version is bad you should see the hand write copy.

Pizza Lord wrote:

Your spelling... I forgot.

:p <--- (playful emoticon. Do you kids still use those?)

ya My 15 and 16 year old talk using Emoticon all the type.

[wpbjr]

Chapter One: Fall of the Lady Celeste

I have done a major edit. I have add a few new NPC and a few new scenes.

Please feel free to leave comments on the Google Doc.